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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23937148">Surface Breaker</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shizuku749/pseuds/Shizuku749'>Shizuku749</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Character Development, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family, Fix-It, Found Family, Friendship, Gen, Healing, Hurt/Comfort, Moving On, Naruto deserves better and I'm gonna give it to him damn it, Naruto's love knows no bounds, Personal Growth, Sharing a Bed, Shikamaru Nara is a Good Friend, Shikamaru Nara is the OG, Shikamaru is Naruto's real BFF fight me, Strong Haruno Sakura, Sunshine and Shadows team up hell yeah</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-04-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 23:15:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>15</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>115,762</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23937148</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shizuku749/pseuds/Shizuku749</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>AU/Canon Divergence post-<i>Shippuden</i> 215. When Naruto nearly dies at Sasuke’s hands for a second time, he makes the decision to finally heed his dead master’s advice and let the Uchiha go. Healing and moving on are never easy, but luckily, Naruto has a whole village (and even those outside it) to aid and love him along the way.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>(mentioned) - Relationship, Haruno Sakura &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Hatake Kakashi &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Karin &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Konoha 11 &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Kyuubi | Nine-tails | Kurama &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Nara Shikamaru &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Tsunade &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke &amp; Uzumaki Naruto, Uzumaki Naruto &amp; Everyone</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>308</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>471</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Cast as Family</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Awakening</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>It's 2020, but I don't care! I am back on my Naruto bullshit! lol. This is a project I came up with just a few days ago, but I'm so passionate about it already (I've literally been losing sleep to my ideas, hahaha)!</p><p>The idea behind this is simple: while this is not meant to be a Sauske hate fic, I have always believed that Naruto deserves so much better than Sasuke and how much he suffers because of him, and he has that in the village - people who love him so much, would do anything from him, would die for him - and after ep 215, I wanted to see what would happen if Naruto finally realized that Sasuke can't be saved. <b>Fair warning:</b> this story is not going to have fighting as the focus. It'll focus on cutting ties and letting go, healing and moving on, and living well (which is the sweetest revenge) by building and rebuilding the healthy, wonderful relationships Naruto has with his friends and mentors in the village (and outside it, 'cause gotta include Gaara and the Sand Sibs and all, haha). <b><i>Correction (7/19/20):</i></b> while this is still true, due to a timeline mix-up on my part, I <i>will</i> be including the Pein Arc in this! (Can read more about this in Ch 5's top Notes! ;))</p><p><b>Canon Divergence start:</b> Different from the actual episode, Naruto and Sasuke's fight goes on a lot longer and is way deadlier. It ends up a fight to the death. The only reason they both survive is because Tobi swoops in to steal Sasuke away, and Naruto passes out a second later. That's where the fic opens.</p><p>If this is of any interest to you, I hope you enjoy this! There will be a lot more to come!</p><p><b>Fun fact:</b> <i>Shippuden</i> Opening 8, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P1yJ51DH-18">"Diver"</a>, illustrates my point perfectly (end 1:03-1:04; the rest reinforces the Sasuke stuff), so that is highly recommended viewing!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>“Naruto!”</em>
</p><p>He remembers coughing up blood, a lot of it, and then…his eyelids were so heavy…</p><p>
  <em>“I can’t… We have to…the village…”</em>
</p><p>He remembers hands on him. Warm and slick and…shaking…</p><p>
  <em>“Stay awake, Naruto…”</em>
</p><p>He remembers intense pain shooting through him, coughing up more blood…</p><p>
  <em>“Hold on!”</em>
</p><p>He remembers rushing paws, so many and so loud it became a roar…</p><p>
  <em>“Just a little farther! You can…”</em>
</p><p>He remembers being set on something soft and cold, tasting more blood…</p><p>
  <em>“Come on, Naruto… You’re…be Hokage…”</em>
</p><p>He remembers pounding feet and familiar voices barking orders…</p><p>
  <em>“Don’t you dare… Stay with me, you stubborn…”</em>
</p><p>He remembers machines screeching and a well of grudgingly-protective rage surging through him…</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Don’t give up, brat!</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>And then…nothing.</p>
<hr/><p>When Naruto wakes, it’s to sights, sounds, and sensations that are becoming more and more familiar over the years.</p><p>Machines beep into an otherwise silent, still room. Sterile floors and walls in dull colors that are supposed to relax and provide a sense of calm. Chemicals most might not be able to smell, the pinch of an IV, a few actually, in his arm. Slightly itchy white sheets and a starchy blue hospital gown that’s too big for his small frame. Bandages cover almost every part of him, and he thinks one of his arms might be in a sling – or at least, bound to his side temporarily. Some seriously strong pain meds must be in his system because, at least for the moment, he doesn’t feel even a fraction of the pain he’s sure he should be in. Sakura or Granny Tsunade, maybe both, must have ordered that for him. He’s grateful.</p><p>Giving his body a few minutes to adjust to being awake after…who knows how long, he turns his head slowly to look around. He almost regrets it when his vision swims, but something else he notices almost immediately takes precedence.</p><p>Body heat at his elbow. There’s…someone else here…?</p><p>For a split second, his heart rate spikes, but it calms just as quickly. His vision might not be clear yet, but he can tell from the steady heartbeat and gentle breathing that whoever it is isn’t here to hurt him. Besides, if the splotches of color he can make out are right, he thinks he knows who it is anyway, and in that case, he’s definitely not worried.</p><p>When he can finally see, Naruto can’t help but smile, what little he can manage anyway. He was right. It’s Shikamaru, fast asleep at his side with his face in his arms. Naruto breathes a laugh. It’s the same way he used to sleep in class at the Academy when they were kids. If he’s asleep, though, Naruto wonders how long he’s been here. He hopes not all night. Besides getting him in trouble with the nurses or, worse, Sakura and Granny Tsunade, leaning over on the mattress like that must be really uncomfortable.</p><p>All the same, he can’t help but soften. He never thought he’d wake up to find Shikamaru Nara, of all people, at his bedside, but he’s certainly not complaining. On the contrary…he’s happy and touched. Shikamaru’s a great friend, one he’s lucky to have, and he knows better than most that the genius doesn’t put his energy into anything he doesn’t believe in. So for him to be here…</p><p>Lifting his good arm experimentally, he finds it doesn’t hurt too much to use. Satisfied, he reaches over to rest a bandaged hand on Shikamaru’s shoulder and shake him gently. “Hey, Shikamaru,” he whispers, not wanting to scare his friend. “Wake up.”</p><p>Shikamaru instantly shifts and opens bleary eyes. Blinking a few times, he pushes himself back some and stretches, yawning so long that it leaves tears at the corners of his eyes. Wiping at them with his sleeves, he looks his way and freezes, blinking a few more times and even rubbing his eyes for good measure. “N-Naruto?” When he sees his friend really is up, he perks up instantly, face breaking into a wide smile, maybe his brightest Naruto’s ever seen. “Hey, you’re finally awake!”</p><p>His smile is contagious. Naruto’s isn’t nearly as big and bright as it normally is, but Shikamaru wasn’t expecting it to be. Not yet, anyway. “Y-yeah, I guess I—I am!” Naruto cringes and coughs at how raw and croaky his voice sounds from disuse, his throat dry as the Demon Desert. Shikamaru helps him sit up enough to drink some water, and Naruto sighs happily once he’s done. There’s more life to the smile he gives this time. “Thanks, Shikamaru! It’s good to see you, too!”</p><p>Shikamaru’s exhale is helplessly fond, the other’s voice and smile the last pieces he needed to know he really is okay – or, you know, going to be. He hangs his head with a heavy sigh, all the tension bleeding from his shoulders as his relief takes all his energy at once. “Thank goodness…”</p><p>Naruto, meanwhile, is silent, studying Shikamaru’s face. Now that it’s not hidden in his arms, his friend looks paler and definitely more tired than usual. There are some pretty dark shadows under his eyes, too. The blond’s brow furrows in concern.</p><p>“Shikamaru…are you okay? You don’t look so good…”</p><p>Shikamaru looks up, startled, and then he laughs, the action helping to further relax him. He can’t help it. He swears Naruto is the most selfless person he’s ever met in his life. “You’re one to talk. You’re practically a walking bandage roll.” Naruto doesn’t let up on his worried stare, though, not swayed by the joke and possible deflection, and Shikamaru sighs a bit, smile sobering along with him. “I’m fine. Just a little tired, is all.” He scrubs his hand down his face and then gives Naruto a semi-scolding look, smirking lightly. “You scared the shit out of us, you knucklehead.”</p><p>Naruto has the grace to look sheepish, rubbing the back of his head before he remembers that hurts. “S-sorry… But, uh…what exactly am I apologizing for…? How’d I get here again…?”</p><p>Shikamaru huffs a laugh. Honestly, this guy… “With how hard you hit your head, I’m not surprised you need a refresher.” He gets more comfortable in his chair and then fixes Naruto with a serious stare. “Depending on how this goes, this might not be the easiest thing to hear, so fair warning. Frankly, I’m glad you’re already lying down.” Naruto’s caught off guard for a moment, but he nods in the next one. Shikamaru takes that as a signal to start. “Well, for starters, you’ve been out for over a week.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, lips parting in surprise. He doesn’t think he’s <em>ever</em> been in the hospital that long before. “W-wait, really? How long?”</p><p>Shikamaru nods, resting his chin between his knuckles. “Eleven days, counting today.”</p><p>The blond pales a bit, good hand moving to the Seal on his stomach. He’s a little surprised that his immediate reaction is to worry about the Beast locked up inside him, but hey, stranger things have happened. To him, at least. He wants to try talking to it to make sure it’s okay, but he doesn’t want to freak Shikamaru out. Maybe if he explains it to him, he can try later.</p><p>As if reading his mind, Shikamaru offers, working to tread carefully, “I’ll get to the Nine Tails in a minute. But for now…what do you remember about what happened?”</p><p>Figuring the Fox is sleeping to regain its energy like he was anyway, Naruto takes a breath and does his best to think back. Everything’s so…hazy… He mostly remembers pain and blood and familiar voices…Kakashi-sensei, Sakura, and Granny Tsunade’s, specifically… Before that…—!</p><p>A face appears in his mind’s eye, and he bolts upright, Sasuke’s name on his lips, but the pain chokes it off and Shikamaru’s urgent, careful hands stop him halfway. It takes a moment for him to get his breath back. “Sa-Sasuke…! He was…!” Suddenly distracted by more important things, he doesn’t even register Shikamaru gently pushing him back down on the bed. “S-Shikamaru, is—Kakashi-sensei and Sakura—!” He swallows, blue eyes blazing as he breathes through the pain. He doesn’t want to even entertain the thought of being wrong. “A-are they okay?”</p><p>Shikamaru swears, no matter how old they get, Naruto’s insane devotion to his friends will always be one of his favorite things about him. He nods, a reassuring smile on his face. “They’re just fine. They made it back here with barely a scratch.” He pokes Naruto’s forehead gently. “It’s <em>you</em> we’ve all been worried sick about.”</p><p>Naruto’s whole body sags with the force of his relieved sigh, spring-coiled tension gone in a second. “Thank goodness…”</p><p>Shikamaru’s smile grows before he sobers again. “So, what <em>do</em> you remember? Let’s start there.”</p><p>Naruto narrows his eyes in concentration, and as the memories start to come back, he feels his stomach drop. “I-I remember…Kakashi and Sasuke about to fight when…S-Sakura tried to—“ he swallows, “—to take him out h-herself. Sasuke retaliated by—by t-trying to stab her with a—a k-kunai through the—” The last word turns to ash on his tongue, too awful to say, but he gestures to his throat with a trembling hand to finish the thought regardless. His words are shaky, horrified, more so as he goes on, and he swallows again, curling a fist in his sheets for purchase. “That’s—that’s when I jumped in. I-I saved her, and then…t-the three of us, all of Team 7, we…w-we <em>tried</em> to convince him to—to come back with us…b-but…” he breathes a laugh, a bitter, angry, almost scared thing, a like smile on his face, “…h-he was talking <em>crazy</em>… He said he—he killed Danzo and that h-he was—was going to k-kill <em>us</em> and then…<em>d-destroy</em> the Leaf to—to ‘cleanse the Uchiha name’…” His fist in the sheets tightens, though he tries to take a shaky breath to steady himself. “I’ve…I’ve never <em>seen</em> him like that before… It was…” he glances up at Shikamaru, knowing he’ll understand, “…it reminded me of the old Gaara, like he sounded when we stopped him from killing Lee all those years ago… <em>That’s</em> what he sounded like...”</p><p><em>Deranged. Unhinged. Totally unrecognizable from the person they knew. </em>Hell, those are being <em>generous</em>…</p><p>Shikamaru swears under his breath, frowning as he glares at the floor. He knew the Uchiha was a little sick in the head, but nothing like this…! Looking back up at Naruto, he asks, “Anything else?”</p><p>He thinks, but then shakes his head. “Everything after that is…a blur, really. Bits and pieces, a lot of blood and pain, but that’s it. Mind filling me in?”</p><p>Shikamaru’s frown deepens, but he sits up a little straighter nonetheless. He’s always been one to rip off bandages quickly. “You used your clones to stop Kakashi-sensei from interfering and then went after Sasuke yourself. Once you two started fighting, there was nothing Kakashi and Sakura could do but watch. There was no way in hell they were getting between you two.” He can only imagine how hard that must have been for them to watch. “The fight went on for a long time, and it got pretty brutal. Sakura had to look away after a while. She couldn’t stand to see you two hurt each other like that. The only reason it stopped without both of you dying was because some guy in a mask showed up and took Sasuke away. You wanted to go after them, but you ended up coughing up blood and passing out a second later. Kakashi and Sakura got you back here as fast as they could, and then Sakura and Lady Tsunade headed the three surgeries necessary to save your life. According to Lady Tsunade, though, it wasn’t just them who saved you.”</p><p>He nods toward Naruto’s Seal. “It was the Nine Tails inside you, too.” Naruto’s eyes widen, and he looks down at where the demon resides. “It used up a lot of its chakra to keep you alive after yours was depleted. That’s also why it’s taking you so long to heal. Since the pair of you are basically out of chakra, the Nine Tails can’t accelerate your healing like it normally would, so your recovery’s pretty much slowed to a crawl.” Taking a sip of his water, he continues, “Anyway, after you got out of surgery, you were still in really bad shape. All the doctors and nurses did their best to take care of you, and Sakura and Lady Tsunade even stepped in and did some special medical ninjutsu stuff where they could, but it was touch and go almost the whole time. Some days were better than others. We were all really afraid you weren’t gonna make it this time.” He rubs the back of his neck and sighs, mostly in relief. “But thankfully, you’re awake now, so that’s over. Thank goodness… I’m getting way too old for this stuff…”</p><p>When Naruto doesn’t immediately laugh and spout some quip about Shikamaru only being a few weeks older, the chunin looks up to make sure he’s okay.</p><p>He finds Naruto staring up at the ceiling, for once completely silent. His eyes are dull, a shade or two darker than they were a few minutes ago, almost listless. His expression is much the same, but Shikamaru can tell there’s a whole maelstrom of emotions playing behind both.</p><p>“Where’s Sasuke now?” Even his voice has lost most of its inflection. He sounds…exhausted, but it’s more than that. Almost...defeated.</p><p>Shikamaru swallows, trying to quell the worry starting to turn his stomach. He hopes it’s just the shock and maybe a reaction to the memories coming back. “Hard to say. According to Kakashi-sensei and Sakura’s reports, when that masked man came for Sasuke, it was like they just vanished into thin air. There wasn’t a trace of them left, not even a chakra signature. Kakashi has a theory that it was some kind of jutsu unique to that man. An ANBU team was dispatched to the area to see what clues they could find, if any, and they <em>did</em> find a red-haired woman who claims she was Sasuke’s…assistant or something, but as far as Sasuke goes…” He shrugs, next words riding on a tired sigh as he scratches his head. “For now, it looks like we’re back to square one.”</p><p>There’s a long, pregnant silence for several moments. The clock ticks by, but Shikamaru can’t bring himself to break it, waiting instead on bated breath for his friend’s response.</p><p>Naruto, for his part, heard everything, it’s just…it’s like there’s white noise playing in the background of his mind. He’s not sure if it has something to do with the Nine Tails’ weakness, his own, or maybe it’s all in his head. He’s trying so hard to process everything he’s just remembered and learned, but…it’s too much. All of it’s too much. He wishes it would stop, especially the static. It’s not helping anything. Maybe…he just needs more sleep. “I see…”</p><p>His voice is even more despondent than before, and that combined with the way he rolls over onto his side, his back to Shikamaru, sets the older boy further on edge. “Naruto…are you okay?” he asks softly. He’s well aware how stupid a question like that probably is right now, but he doesn’t care. He needs to know, and more than that, he <em>wants</em> to. This would be a lot to take in for anybody, but <em>especially</em> Naruto, who loves with absolutely everything he has in him, and <em>hell</em>, he basically fought his former teammate to the <em>death</em> (for a <em>second</em> time), so it makes sense that this would negatively affect him. Of <em>course</em> it does. It’s only natural. He remembers the last time Naruto shut down like this, after his first near-death fight with Sasuke in the Valley of the End. But still, this…it feels…<em>different</em> somehow. He can’t quite put his finger on why yet. He just hopes it won’t be <em>worse</em>. God forbid.</p><p>Finally, curling into himself a little more, Naruto answers, “Y-yeah…” His voice is so hollow and low that Shikamaru almost has to strain to hear it. The brunette swears he’s the worst liar in the world. He’s not even trying at this point. It only makes him worry more. “Hey…Shikamaru…?”</p><p>Said boy leans forward so he can hear better. “Yeah? What’s—?”</p><p>Suddenly, there’s a bandaged arm around him, and the next thing Shikamaru knows, Naruto’s hugging him. He couldn’t even sit up before without being in intense pain, but now, through sheer force of will, he’s <em>hugging him</em>. Shikamaru breathes an exasperated laugh. “Thank you, Shikamaru. For staying.”</p><p>It’s barely more than a whisper, but Shikamaru hears it like it’s the only thing that matters. Right now, to him, it is. He gets the feeling Naruto isn’t just talking about being here when he woke up either. He can’t help but smile and hug his friend back gently, not wanting to hurt him more than he’s probably hurting himself. He feels Naruto relax in his arms, and he holds him just a little tighter, letting his face tuck just slightly into the blond’s shoulder. He’s so, so glad he’s alive. “Don’t mention it. What else are friends for?”</p><p>Naruto actually does manage a chuckle at that, and Shikamaru considers it a personal victory. They stay like that for several seconds more before settling Naruto back in bed.</p><p>“H-hey, um…” Shikamaru’s steady, calm gaze never leaves the blue-eyed boy; he wants to help in any way he can, “…don’t leave?” Then, even quieter, “Please?”</p><p>The whirlwind in Shikamaru’s gut dies down, if only a little, and even though Naruto’s too embarrassed to look at him, feeling his request childish, he hopes he can feel the way his gaze softens. He leans back in his chair to get a little more comfortable. If the nurses want to throw him out now, they’re going to have to contend with Naruto’s word as well as his own. “I’m not going anywhere,” he promises quietly. “Sleep well, Naruto.”</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>“I’m going to kill all of you…”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“You never had a family! You couldn’t possibly understand!”</em>
</p><p>
  <em>“The Hidden Leaf will be destroyed by my own hand!”</em>
</p><p><em>Images of the Hidden Leaf in burning ruins pass by, nondescript screams and sobs piercing the air. Bodies everywhere—crushed, burning, impaled, cut in half, dismembered—so many there’s almost no open ground to be seen. Moving closer to the center, all of Naruto’s mentors and friends are lying on the ground, unmoving and unseeing. They’ve been killed, </em>murdered<em>, in chilling, gut-wrenching ways, each worse than the last. Those closest to Naruto were dealt the worst deaths by far.</em></p><p>
  <em>In the middle of it all, Sasuke holds a dying Naruto by his collar, grinning at him like a lunatic, eyes wild. He leans in close, his Magekyo Sharingan glowing an unsettling red. Naruto can see and smell the blood coating his lips and teeth, gushing from now-blind eyes. “I win…Naruto!”</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>“<strong><em>No</em></strong>! <em>Sasuke</em>!”</p><p>Naruto shoots upright instantly, screaming loudly enough to wake the rest of the patients on the floor.</p><p>“Whoa, hey!”</p><p>His good arm clutches at his chest where a huge hole was a second ago, he’s sure of it.</p><p>“Naruto!”</p><p>He’s shaking like a leaf, drenched in sweat, breathing and heart rate erratic.</p><p>“Damn it! Can’t you hear me?!”</p><p>Tears flow freely from blue eyes that can see nothing but the carnage and world-ending in his nightmare. Part of him knows it’s not real, but he can’t—he can’t <em>shake it</em>—!</p><p>“Hey, <em>Naruto</em>!”</p><p>Naruto snaps his neck to find Shikamaru standing at his side. He has a tight, tremulous grip on his shoulder, and the older boy’s looking at him like he’s afraid he’ll pass out or start screaming again any second. They’re both breathing hard, but for two very different reasons. Shikamaru, seeing the change in him immediately, lets out a shaky breath, worry pinching his brow hard. “Hey, hey…” He squeezes his shoulder a little more to hopefully help ground him in reality. “You with me?”</p><p>Naruto takes a minute to catch his breath and slowly ease his white-knuckled fist from his shirt so he can reach up to wipe his eyes and face and then rest it on Shikamaru’s. He nods. “Y-yeah…I-I think so…” Shikamaru doesn’t let up right away, not moving an inch, and Naruto tries to manage a smile for him. It’s pitiful, but it’s something. “S-sorry if I scared you…”</p><p>A few more cautious seconds, and like the string holding him up has been cut, Shikamaru’s whole body slumps and he takes a heavy seat on the edge of Naruto’s bed. He sighs wearily and buries his face in his hand, just trying to breathe. He shakes his head. “No, it’s…don’t worry about it…”</p><p>He says that, and yet his shoulders are trembling, just slightly. Naruto isn’t sure he’s noticed. He gets the feeling his friend might have had a tougher time waking him up than he wants to tell him. Suddenly worried he might have actually <em>hurt</em> him in his terror, he looks him over for any injuries, but doesn’t find any. He lets out a relieved, silent sigh of his own. Thank goodness… “I’m…I’m sorry…” He winces at the sound of his own voice. It’s even worse than when he first woke up. Probably from all the crying and screaming. “It was…” he looks away, embarrassed and ashamed to have caused all this trouble, voice falling, “…it was just...a nightmare…”</p><p>Shikamaru, while listening intently, takes a deep breath before letting it out slowly. He does that a few times before he lets his hand fall. It’s a calming exercise Asuma taught him years ago. It almost always works, and this is no exception. He’s grateful.</p><p>Turning back to Naruto, he hesitates a half-second ahead of reaching out to squeeze the blond’s fingers lightly. After so many years of being friends and as observant as he is, the notion that physical affection is something Naruto lives for hasn’t been lost on him. Never mind that he’s not usually especially physically affectionate himself, if he can give Naruto some comfort right now, damn it, he’ll do just about anything. “I know. I heard. About Sasuke attacking the village and killing everyone in horribly brutal ways, right?” Naruto looks at him like he’s grown two heads, and he explains, a tiny, wry smirk coming despite himself. “Unfortunately, your mumbles and screams didn’t leave much to the imagination.”</p><p>Paling, Naruto shakes his head roughly to get rid of the resurfaced images. “S-sorry…”</p><p>Shikamaru frowns. “Hey, stop that. This is <em>not</em> something you have to apologize for,” he tells him firmly. “After what you’ve been through, I don’t blame you for freaking out, even in your sleep. Any sane person would.”</p><p>Naruto breathes a laugh at that, somewhat relieved. Still, something in his expression is almost… haunted. ‘Sane,’ huh…? “So I’m not a drag, then?”</p><p>Shikamaru recognizes that look on sight. He used to wear it all the time as a kid, and it comes back once in a while when he’s reminded of back then. Hell, even just a few short years ago. His answering almost-snarl makes Naruto look up at him with wide eyes, but Shikamaru can’t help it. “<em>No</em>, of course not.” He doesn’t care if it’s been years. He still wants to punch all the ignorant bastards in this village who ever made Naruto feel like he was nothing but a worthless demon. He was a <em>child</em>, for God’s sake! “<em>You</em> are not a drag, idiot. You never could be.”</p><p>A heartbeat, and something in Naruto’s face and eyes softens, the shadows leaving his eyes, and a more believable, if still small, smile paints his lips. Shikamaru feels himself relax at that alone. “Got it. Thanks, Shikamaru.”</p><p>“You’re welcome.” It’s quiet for a good few seconds, and then, quietly, hesitantly, “So…do you wanna talk about it?”</p><p>Naruto blinks and then thinks. He could tell him what he’s thinking and feeling, but…right now, it’s all still kind of a mess inside, and that nightmare didn’t help. He might be able to help him figure out a solution, but he also gets the feeling that Shikamaru would tell him this is something he has to figure out for himself. With that in mind, he slowly shakes his head. “Not yet. I…I still need to…sort some things out. In my head and…my heart, too. How I’m feeling…you know?” Blue eyes leisurely move to meet brown. His tiny smile’s grown a bit. “But thank you. I’ll tell you when, okay?”</p><p>Shikamaru isn’t so sure he likes letting this lie, but…he trusts Naruto. He trusts that he’ll come to him if he needs someone to confide in. “Sure. Take your time. I’ll be here.”</p><p>Naruto softens, tries really hard <em>not</em> to think of the three clean-through sword wounds that traveled the length of Shikamaru’s midsection in his nightmare. He swallows, does his best to remind himself that the blood on his tongue isn’t <em>real</em>. His smile wavers, turns fragile, but then bounces back to be even bigger than before. “T-thanks, Shikamaru. You’re the best.”</p><p>Shikamaru’s cheeks color slightly at the compliment, not expecting it. Avoiding his gaze momentarily, he gently pushes Naruto back down on the bed. “Again, you’re welcome. Now…” he moves from the mattress back to his chair so he doesn’t crowd his friend, “…get some sleep. For real this time.” Sensing he’s nervous, he reaches out to squeeze his fingers again, leaving them there. If it’ll help him sleep and avoid any more nightmares for the night, he doesn’t mind. He offers a reassuring smile. “It’ll be fine, you’ll see. If I’m wrong, I’ll eat my words and do something we <em>both</em> know I think is a total drag.”</p><p>Naruto laughs, for real this time. It looks like some of his color’s finally coming back, too. That’s good. “A—” a big yawn interrupts him, and his eyelids start to droop; his exhaustion’s rushing back now that he feels warm and safe again, “—all right... Night…Shikamaru…”</p><p>He’s out like a light in just a few seconds, and that means Shikamaru can finally relax himself. He doesn’t plan on sleeping just yet, wanting to make sure Naruto really will be okay first, but he’ll get there eventually. Leaning back in his chair, head propped against the wall, he looks out the window at the clear, starry night sky. They might not be clouds, but they’ll do.</p><p>Something about all this tells Shikamaru that Naruto’s recovery won’t be as smooth as the last time.</p><p>But lucky for him?</p><p>This time, he has Shikamaru at his back.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>About Shikamaru here, just in case: while he might be less 'what a drag' than usual, I have my reasons for that. My thinking is that he was really freaked out when he thought Naruto was really gonna die (they all were), he's pissed at Sasuke, as he gets older and more mature (espec following Asuma's death) he says it less (as shown in later eps/movies, so applying it here, lol), and he knows (as much as he can,at least) how hard this must be on Naruto, so he wants to help in any way he can. Plus, helping his friends like this is one of the few things that isn't a drag to him.</p><p>Thanks so much for reading! Can't wait to hear what you think!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. The Right Decisions</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sometimes, you have to let yourself break in order to be rebuilt stronger than before.</p><p>Naruto comes to his decision, and Granny Tsunade pays him a visit.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Today was a very rough day (family dog sickness issues), but I was determined to get this chapter out because that was my plan last night, and I need something to distract me, so! It might not be perfect, but I did my best!</p><p>This is the Tsunade and Naruto's decision chapter! There is a Naruto-Sasuke relationship analysis in the middle (after the first line break), and while it's not bashing Sasuke, it doesn't exactly read favorably on their relationship either, so if you like Sasuke, read at your own risk! That said, hope it's all right!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>“Sasuke went to Orochimaru of his own free will. No matter what you do, he will not change…”</em>
</p><p>“B-but I…” Naruto murmurs in his sleep.</p><p><em>“Don’t delude yourself into thinking that </em>you<em> can bring him back. </em>You can’t<em>. It’s </em>hopeless<em>. It’s a </em>fool’s<em> errand…”</em></p><p>His fingers curl in the sheets. “I’m not a…”</p><p><em>“</em>Idiot<em>! Take a good look at the condition you’re in, and </em>he’s<em> the one who did it to you! Was </em>that<em> the work of a friend?!”</em></p><p>His grip loosens and fingers twitch in response to the pain pulsing through him. “Y-you’re right…b-but…”</p><p>
  <em>“What happened was destined to happen…”</em>
</p><p>“I…” there’s great difficulty in getting this out, something he hasn’t wanted to admit even to himself, “…I know, but…”</p><p>
  <em>“To be a shinobi, you need more than strength and jutsu. You must acquire the judgment to make the right decisions. You must become smarter...”</em>
</p><p>“But…what <em>is</em> right…?” A tear leaves his eye. “P-please, I don’t…”</p><p>
  <em>“You can’t help him, so you should forget about him. Dismiss him from your mind, and move on…”</em>
</p><p>Naruto’s eyes flutter open as another tear falls and Jiraiya’s last words echo in his mind. It takes him a good few seconds to even register that he’s awake. But there’s warmth at his elbow again, closer this time than when he woke up yesterday, it moves closer still, and then Shikamaru leans into his line of sight. He looks concerned. “Hey…you all right?”</p><p>Blue eyes drift to him, and Naruto slowly reaches up to wipe at his eyes and face. It takes him a moment to remember his dream, why it made him cry in his sleep, but once he does…he can’t decide if he’s happy or sad. Maybe it’s something in between. He’s sure it shows on his face, too, because he can feel Shikamaru’s patient, yet worried and discerning gaze gaining intensity.</p><p>“Just a dream…” he finally answers, voice slightly raspy from sleep and his frankly confusing mood. Opening his eyes again, he looks up at Shikamaru. He knows he’ll understand this, too, and he takes a moment to thank everything for him, offering a minuscule, reopened-wound smile. “It was just…something Pervy Sage told me…a long time ago…”</p><p>Shikamaru’s eyes don’t leave him right away, waiting for him to elaborate if he wants or needs to talk, but when Naruto seems intent on sticking to his ‘figure this out myself’ guns from last night, he doesn’t push him. Leaning back so as not to crowd him, he gives an acknowledging, future-encouraging hum. “Well, in any case, good morning.”</p><p>Stretching a bit, he yawns, and Naruto, returning the greeting, worries that and Shikamaru being awake <em>before</em> him means he woke him up again. He hopes not. He tunes back in when the older boy grabs a small bed-tray of hospital food from the nightstand and positions it for him on his lap. Shikamaru smiles gently, but it’s firm, too, almost like a mom’s would be. Not that Naruto would know what that’s like, of course, but it’s just what he’s always <em>imagined</em> a morning-mom’s to look like. “You haven’t eaten since you woke up yesterday evening. You should try to get something down, at least, even if it’s not much.”</p><p>Naruto peers down at the small plate of fruit, vegetables, and bread, and he feels his stomach go to war with itself, too. He wants to eat it, but…with everything weighing on his mind… “I’m…not really hungry…”</p><p>There’s a moment of silence, and then, “You know, when I'm upset, I can't eat either. I get it.” Asuma’s death was his most extreme example of that. Naruto’s gaze snaps back to him, surprise, relief, and empathy (because of <em>course</em> he read between the lines) in equal parts playing on his face. “I certainly won't force you. I'm not your—” he winces, catching himself too late; damn it, Shikamaru, bad choice of words – but luckily, when he looks over, Naruto doesn’t seem to have taken any offense, thank goodness, “—w-well, you know. But I'm just saying,” he offers a kind smile, “no matter how upset I am, once I do eventually eat something? I always feel better, and I can think more clearly." He taps his temple. "Your brain can’t figure out its half of this on an empty stomach, you know?"</p><p>Naruto, seeing the sense in his logic – because of course he does, of course it makes perfect sense and is brilliant, this is <em>Shikamaru</em> – looks back down at the plate and slowly picks up the small piece of bread. Once he does, he notices that it’s already been buttered just the way he likes it. He blinks. How did Shikamaru know that? Taking a half-bite, he glances up when Shikamaru stands to walk over to the open window. Scribbling a note, he whistles, high and clear, and a messenger hawk flies over a second later to land on the sill. Naruto figures it must have been waiting for him to get here so quickly, but he can’t imagine why. Slipping his message into its container, Shikamaru releases the bird with a “Go!” and watches it fly toward the Hokage’s office.</p><p>Satisfied, he turns back around to find Naruto halfway through his bread and staring at him with a half-raised eyebrow. Calmly walking back to his seat, the brunet says, “Explanation one, for the bread: we may not have gone on too many missions together, but the ones we have, I noticed that whenever you ran out of ramen, you always ate your bread like this.” He shrugs like it’s no big deal, but…to Naruto, it is. He’s not surprised that Shikamaru paid attention, obviously. He’s always been crazy observant. He’s just surprised Shikamaru chose to pay attention to <em>him</em>.</p><p>“Explanation two, for the message: I promised Lady Tsunade I’d alert her the second you woke up.” He winks. “<em>Technically</em>, I probably should have told her last night,” he puts a secretive finger in front of his lips, “<em>but</em> I didn’t want to overwhelm you when you first woke up. I wanted to make sure you had some breathing space first.” Warm affection spreads through Naruto’s chest. Shikamaru really is the best… “Hopefully, she won’t find out. Otherwise…” he grimaces just thinking about it, the blond doing the same, “…she’ll totally kick my ass and maybe even deny me my request, never mind that it was already put through… That really <em>would</em> be a drag…”</p><p>Naruto swallows his bite of food. “D-don’t worry, I won’t tell her, promise. My lips are sealed.” Remembering the tail end of what Shikamaru said, though, he tilts his head and asks curiously, “Oh, but wait, what request? Like, for time off or something?” Eyes widening, he sits up straighter and a small gasp leaves him. “H-hold on, you’re not sick or anything, are you? Is that why you’re so tired and pale and have those dark bags under your eyes?”</p><p>Shikamaru blinks wide eyes a few times, bewildered, but then he remembers who he’s talking to. Softening, he waves calming hands in front of himself sheepishly. He probably should have worded that differently… “No, no, nothing like that. It’s nothing for you to worry about, really.” Naruto’s worried stare only strengthens, however, and he melts a little more. “I’m serious, Naruto. I’m just tired. If it makes you feel better, I can ask Lady Tsunade to check me over so you can see for yourself.”</p><p>A few seconds more, and Naruto shakes his head, a small, relieved smile on his face. “You don’t have to do that, but thanks. I trust you, I swear. I was just worried, that’s all.” He moves to link his hands behind his head like he usually does, but he forgot his other hand isn’t working yet. He probably looks silly like this. Oh, well. He grins brightly. “Well, whatever you asked the time off for, even if it’s just a whole week of cloud-watching, I hope you have fun! You work hard, and you deserve a break!” He gives him a thumbs up. “So enjoy it, okay?”</p><p>Shikamaru can’t help falling tender. This knucklehead has no idea about the reason behind his request, does he? He supposes it’s just as well. “I will, thanks. Don’t worry. I have a feeling this particular reprieve will be just what I need to get my energy back.” (Or deplete it a few more times, but who’s keeping score, really?)</p><p>Naruto grins, and he pops the last of his bread in his mouth. Silence settles as he takes advantage of this time to really think through his dilemma, eating what he can of the rest of the food on autopilot. Shikamaru lets him be, reading over mission reports he brought to keep himself occupied until Naruto decides he’s ready to talk.</p><p>Naruto wants and needs to figure this out on his own, sure, but that doesn’t mean he has to <em>be</em> or <em>feel </em>alone while he does it.</p><p>There’s a big difference.</p>
<hr/><p>Naruto Uzumaki and Sasuke Uchiha…</p><p>Naruto never thought this day would come, when he’d have to <em>really</em> <em>think </em>about what they are to each other, but…then again, when he was younger, he never thought he’d have <em>friends</em> or anyone who cared about him at all, so…</p><p>When they were kids, he was jealous of Sasuke, but he wanted to be like him, too. He also felt a camaraderie with him because they were the orphans without anyone to care for them. They both knew what that gaping, aching loneliness was like. At least…that’s how <em>he</em> felt.</p><p>But Sasuke…</p><p>Now that he really, honestly, <em>truly</em> thinks about it…all Sasuke ever did was belittle him, push him away, always treat him like…well, like he was more than a bother, more than the worst Academy student, like…</p><p><em>Dirt</em> is the only word that comes to mind. Maybe less and worse than that.</p><p>Really, Sasuke was…the worst to him out of everyone. At the time, Naruto had thought it was just Sasuke being too proud to admit he actually gave a damn about anyone or anything except himself and his revenge…but thinking back on it now…</p><p>Did Sasuke ever talk to him civilly? Did he ever say good morning or goodnight? Did he <em>ever</em> say hi or see you later? Those are small things, he knows, tiny, insignificant things that almost no one else would give a single damn about, but to Naruto…to Naruto, they’re <em>everything</em>. And Sasuke should have known that – hell, <em>did</em>, he <em>had</em> to have, he’d <em>seen</em> Naruto light up every single time any of the others would say them to him – and yet…and yet…</p><p>Did he ever even say happy birthday to him? He never expected a present, of course, he wasn’t <em>that</em> delusional, but he didn’t think a happy birthday from his own teammate was too much to ask (especially when all the others had said it, something that had put Naruto over the moon – no one had <em>ever</em> said it to him before!). Naruto had wished <em>him</em> a happy birthday, had secretly slipped a present in his room (without Sasuke even <em>noticing</em>, which Naruto had counted as a personal win at the time). He’d never even gotten a ‘thank you,’ not that that was the point. It was just…the principle of the thing. And again, Sasuke <em>had</em> to have known how important that was to him…</p><p>And more than that, than <em>all</em> of that…when Sasuke left the village, made it abundantly clear that he didn’t want him around, to follow him, to <em>save</em> him, Naruto just thought it was the Curse Mark’s influence. But still, even <em>with</em> that excuse…Sasuke tried to <em>kill</em> him. You can dress it up any way you want – call it a friendly spat, an argument gone wrong, a battle of wills, <em>whatever</em> – but…at the end of the day, Sasuke’s intent was to <em>murder him in cold blood</em>, just for the sake of furthering his revenge. Naruto was on the <em>brink of death</em> when Kakashi-sensei found him. He completely <em>wrecked</em> his entire body. Even with his advanced healing, it took him half a week to recover.</p><p>Pervy Sage had warned him. What he’d said in his dream… It was the same speech he’d given him the day after everything. He <em>told</em> Naruto that Sasuke left of his own free will, that he was beyond saving, that a <em>friend</em> would never do this to him…but Naruto thought he knew better. Up until this point, he still did.</p><p>He just…he really thought, if he just trained hard and got strong enough, Sasuke would finally treat him like an equal, like someone worth his time and attention, and maybe…if he was really, insanely lucky, he could even persuade him to try coming back to the village. When he did, he’d see that Naruto was right all along – that revenge wasn’t worth trading every good thing in his life, that hatred would only taint and twist his soul until there was nothing left for him in the world at all.</p><p>That…that they could be <em>friends</em>…</p><p>Because, he’s just now realizing…they never really <em>were</em>.</p><p>A few tears fall, staining the sheets and the bandages on his hand, a shaking, white-knuckled fist curled in the cloth. He has to purse his lips as more rush to join them.</p><p>Maybe…he should have taken their entire lives growing up together as a hint. Maybe he shouldn’t have assumed they were one and the same and hid their pain behind the masks they showed the world. Maybe he should have known when they were teammates in life or death situations and he <em>still</em> didn’t care (that one time with Haku doesn’t count; Sasuke even said his body moved on its <em>own</em>). Maybe he shouldn’t have given him the benefit of the doubt so many times and actually started taking his words <em>and</em> actions at face value.</p><p>Maybe, if he did, then…he wouldn’t be in this situation right now.</p><p>Maybe he wouldn’t be in so much pain, physical <em>and</em> emotional.</p><p>Maybe he would have realized sooner that…to Sasuke, he’s just a means to an end. That’s all he’s even been, really. A goal to reach and then grind into dust in his climb to the top.</p><p>And now that he knows all this, now that he knows where they stand…</p><p>He remembers hearing something once: <em>love yourself enough to let them go</em>. He didn’t understand it then, never thought he would because he could never imagine letting one of his friends go anywhere he couldn’t (<em>wouldn’t</em>) follow.</p><p>But now…he thinks he gets it now. So much more intimately than he ever, <em>ever</em> wanted to.</p><p>Pervy Sage’s words echo in his mind again. <em>“To be a shinobi, you need more than strength and jutsu. You must acquire the judgment to make the right decisions...”</em></p><p>So, this is how it feels, then…? To make the ‘right decisions’…?</p><p>His shoulders quake with suppressed sobs as tears rain down, and he swears he’ll always be grateful for the way Shikamaru just reaches over and holds him through it.</p><p>This has been a long time coming.</p>
<hr/><p>Hours later, Shikamaru takes back the soaked washcloth he’d had Naruto hold under his eyes, silently noting that the blond already looks like he’s feeling better. He’s glad. “Where’d you learn a trick like that, Shikamaru?” Naruto asks curiously, raising an eyebrow.</p><p>The genius shrugs, laying that cloth out to dry while he hands Naruto a dry one. “Just something Ino taught me when we were kids.” He snickers. “Something about ‘don’t let the boys who reject you know you’ve been crying’ or some crap like that? Hell if I know, really.” He lays that cloth out to dry, too. “But what do you know? Turns out, it came in handy for somethin’. Guess I’ll have to thank her when I see her next.”</p><p>Naruto chuckles, and he opens his mouth to say something when muffled yelling in the hallway catches their ears. There’s a rush of footsteps getting closer in the next second. Both boys glance at each other, not sure what to expect. From the sound of it, it’s most likely either Sakura or Lady Tsunade.</p><p>The door slides open, and a bright, toothy beam leaps onto Naruto’s face. “Granny Tsunade! It’s you!” He laughs, rubbing the back of his head. “You sure made a commotion out there!”</p><p>When she doesn’t reply, just takes in every inch of him without a word, face crumpling more and more until she has to bite her trembling lower lip, his smile falls. Tears start in her eyes, and her hands ball into fists. “H-hey, Granny…are you okay?” he asks carefully.</p><p>A heartbeat, he blinks, and the next thing he knows, she’s throwing her arms around him in one fell swoop. She hugs him as tightly as she dares, one hand curling in his hospital gown and the other cradling the back of his head. His shoulder’s already wet with her tears, but he doesn’t mind. “You idiot…”</p><p>Naruto relaxes in her warm, protective hold, wrapping his good arm around her and burying his face in her shoulder with a smile. “I’m okay, Granny… I’ll…” he swallows, remembering his dream and the decision he came to, “…I’ll be okay…”</p><p>She holds him closer, so much that it kind of hurts, actually, but he’s guessing that’s on purpose because in the next moment, she’s pulling back and wiping at her eyes and face and poking him in the forehead hard. “<em>I’ll</em> be the judge of that!” He lets her check him over with her medical ninjutsu, used to it by now, and when she’s done, she sighs in relief and smiles. “Well, while your recovery is still going to take a while, I’m happy to report that you <em>are</em> healing nicely.”</p><p>“<em>All right</em>!” Naruto cheers, beaming and throwing his good arm in the air. Pain flashes through him, and he hisses and curses himself for forgetting that would hurt, instinctively pressing a hand to his chest where the pain is. When he doesn’t feel the cool edges of his crystal, be blinks and looks down. His eyes widen. He’s…not wearing his necklace… Thinking back, he doesn’t remember hearing the familiar <em>clink!</em> of his and Tsunade’s crystals colliding during their hug either. He pales drastically, a look of dawning horror on his face. “Oh, no! It’s gone!” He starts looking around frantically, lifting his pillow and the sheets, feeling around everywhere. “W-where’d it go?! I-It’s gotta be here somewhere!”</p><p>Tsunade and Shikamaru are thrown. “Whoa, what? What’s missing?” the Nara boy asks, looking around on the floor in case whatever it is just fell.</p><p>“Naruto, what’s gotten into you?” Tsunade demands.</p><p>“My necklace! The one you gave me, Granny! I gotta find it!” All of a sudden, he freezes as a terrible thought occurs to him. He pales even more. “W-what if I lost it in the fight?” Burying his fingers in his hair, he tugs at it in panicked frustration. “Oh, no! If it fell in the river or in the forest somewhere, I might <em>never</em> find it!” He turns to Shikamaru quickly. “S-Shikamaru, you said an ANBU team was dispatched there, right? Do you know if they found it?” He holds his fingers about two inches apart. “It’s a black cord with a sea-green crystal on it that’s about this long, two little metal ball things on either side! It’s my most prized possession!”</p><p>Shikamaru’s still bewildered, but now that he thinks about it, he remembers that necklace. He’s <em>seen</em> Naruto wearing it. Hell, the guy never takes it off. It’s practically a part of him. Frowning, he shakes his head, rubbing the back of his neck. “Sorry, I haven’t heard anything. I can go over the reports again, though, if you want.”</p><p>Naruto deflates and sniffs, looking so much like a kicked puppy that Shikamaru feels his heart squeeze. “No, that’s okay. With your crazy memory, you’d remember something like that, I’m sure. Thanks, though.”</p><p>A throat clears, and Naruto’s gaze snaps to Tsunade. Around her neck, he finds both necklaces, hers <em>and</em> his, and he brightens, pointing with a gasp. “There it is! Why didn’t you tell me you were wearing it, Granny?”</p><p>Tsunade smiles gently and reaches up to close her hand around the crystal, shaking her head. “Sorry, but…you can’t have this back. For the moment, it’s no longer yours.”</p><p>His smile immediately falls like a stone, his heart with it. Confusion and anxiety immediately crowd his chest, he pales even more than before, and his heartbeat accelerates as a few terrible explanations come to mind. He thinks he might be sick.</p><p>“Wait, Granny, you’re…” he hates the way his voice trembles and cracks, lowered finger shaking, “…you’re not…I mean…you wouldn’t…—?”</p><p>His vision blurs, but he isn’t sure if it’s because of tears or he’s about to pass out until a few droplets fall and burn down his cheeks. There’s a painful lump in his throat that’s too big to swallow, and his heart feels like it’s constricting in his chest.</p><p>Tsunande catches on almost immediately, and she can’t help the way her her heart breaks, horrified expression following. “Oh, <em>Naruto</em>…” Reaching out slowly, she freezes when Naruto flinches, half-raises his arm to shield his face like he’s expecting to be <em>hit</em> as he’s pushed away, cast out – an age-old, hard-learned defense mechanism if she’s ever seen one – and that’s it. Her heart shatters.</p><p>“<em>No</em>, Naruto,” she says, almost hisses, practically snarls, but there’s something so protective and fierce and <em>maternal</em> in it that, this time, Naruto isn’t afraid of it for a second. He lets her take him into her arms and wrap them around him as far as they’ll go. Propriety and favoritism and all that crap be damned. This child is <em>hers</em>, damn it! “Don’t you dare think that, not for a second. That will <em>never</em> happen, you hear me?” There’s a strangled something like a sob that slips from Naruto’s throat, and it <em>hurts</em>, but it’s relieved and happy and thank-God, too, and Shikamaru swears it’s the only thing that makes this even remotely okay. Having also understood what Naruto meant, better than Tsunade ever could, he’d barely kept himself from diving in first, grip on his knees so tight his fingers went white. Naruto nods, burying his face farther in Tsunade’s shoulder, and she curls her fingers in his hair, stroking rhythmically. “Your place in this village, your place with <em>me</em>, is not and never will be in question. You’re one of us, you always will be, and you <em>know</em> how I feel about you.”</p><p>The last bit is a statement, not a question, and Naruto lets out a shaky breath as he nods again, a small, happy smile painting his lips. Thank goodness…</p><p>Pulling away slowly, she dries his tears as she explains, “I only took the necklace off because I needed to get past it to save your life. I didn’t want to risk it getting lost or damaged, so in the heat of the moment, I put it on. Force of habit, I guess.” She shrugs and softens. “I can’t give it back yet because it’ll get in the way when your nurses change your bandages, but as soon as you’re well enough, it’ll go right back where it belongs. I promise.”</p><p>Naruto hums in acknowledgement. “I get it now. Thanks, Granny. That means a lot to me.”</p>
<hr/><p>They talk for a while about what’s happened since Naruto’s been out, and then, once that topic dwindles, Tsunade fixes Naruto with a knowing stare. Something’s been off with him all day. “Naruto…how are you feeling?” Before he can answer incorrectly, she clarifies, “And I don’t just mean physically.”</p><p>He closes his mouth, and somehow, <em>seeing </em>his bright blue eyes go dark and dull and fall victim to the devastation he’s feeling hurts more than just about anything. Shikamaru watches him closely, but it’s never overbearing. Just concerned and protective, steady and warm. “Granny…” Naruto’s voice is like it was last night, almost devoid of emotion, and yet it’s different, too, so full and <em>resigned</em> at the same time, “…can I ask you something? It’s really personal, and it might hurt…and I don’t <em>want</em> that, but…” he glares downward, curling a fist in the sheets, “…I <em>need</em> to know...”</p><p>Her gaze never leaves him, and after a moment or two, she nods. “All right. What is it, Naruto?”</p><p>He hesitates for a moment before turning back to her, looking her right in the eyes. “How…how did you let go of Orochimaru? How did you deal with it?”</p><p>Tsunade’s eyes blow open wide, her face loses all color, and she squeezes her hands white in an attempt to keep her temper in check. She looks like she’s doing her damndest to glare a hole in the wall. “Why the hell are you asking about that all of a sudden?”</p><p>“Because…” He falters, gaze falling and expression with it. Maybe…maybe he shouldn’t… He doesn’t want to reopen this wound for her. It’s…if it’s this painful for him and he’s just <em>starting</em>…</p><p>“I dismissed him from my mind and moved on.” Naruto snaps up, eyes wide. Those are…! “Jiraiya’s words, yes. When Orochimaru abandoned us and the village, I was angry and hurt, and I wanted to give up, but something in me held out the smallest bit of hope. Jiraiya was different. He was the ‘you’ of our team, let’s say. He wanted to fully believe in the friend we’d grown up with, always had every hope that he could convince him to come back to us. He tried time and time again to bring Orochimaru back, gave years of his life to that cause, and he had to learn the hard way that that just wasn’t going to happen. He was lucky to escape with his life.” She sighs. This is hard to talk about. She hasn’t in a long, long time for just that reason. “In the end…<em>he</em> was the one who finally got me to snuff out that last bit of hope before it dragged me under completely. That was the advice he gave me, and…it did the trick. It didn’t make it magically easier to get up every day and face the world head-on, but…it helped. It’s what’s gotten me to where I am now.”</p><p>A heartbeat, and then, “Now, are you going to tell me what this is all about?”</p><p>His heart shudders at the idea of actually saying it out loud, but…it’s only fair. He has to be strong, for himself <em>and</em> his friends’ sakes. “I’m…” she looks back at him at the tremor in his voice, not missing the way his good hand trembles; Shikamaru listens like his life depends on it, “…it’s…it’s time that I…” his fist curls so tightly, his knuckles crack; he knew this would be hard to say, but he didn’t think it would be <em>this</em> difficult, “…I give up on Sauske…”</p><p>The next several moments are so tense, they could be cut with a knife.</p><p>“Naruto…what are you talking about?” Tsunade asks carefully, eyes narrowing. “Where is this coming from?”</p><p>“I had a nightmare about Sasuke last night. A <em><span class="u">bad</span></em> one. Shikamaru can tell you.” He nods toward the older boy, and the brunet nods solemnly when Tsunade looks at him to confirm. “After that, this morning, I dreamed about...about Pervy Sage,” she winces at the nickname, eyes falling and biting her lip, “about what he said to me after the <em>first</em> time Sasuke did this to me.” He lifts his busted hand for emphasis, a bitter smile playing. “And I’ve been thinking on it a lot, hours and hours, and…I think I finally understand.”</p><p>“Understand what?” Shikamaru asks softly, patient and calm despite his own surprise. With Naruto’s nightmare, how he’s acted about Sasuke since he woke up, and <em>especially</em> after his breakdown earlier, the strategist figured his decision would be something like this. But anticipating something and hearing it in reality are two very different things.</p><p>“Sasuke’s…never cared about me. All he’s ever cared about is getting revenge on Itachi, and I’ve only ever been in the way of that. And even now that he’s gotten it, he’s still…” He’s pretty sure this is the hardest thing he’s ever had to say in his life. The words are lodging in his throat, threatening to choke him. He does his best to breathe through it. He doesn’t want them to burst out in an ugly rush. “I can’t…keep giving all of myself to someone who can’t be saved.” He breathes a laugh, but it’s mirthless and sad and so damn <em>hurt</em>, and that and the way his eyes swim make his friends’ hearts twist painfully. “He’s a lost cause, a-and I—I know that now. Hell, <em>look</em> at me…” The smile on his face is as broken as his laugh, and he’s not surprised when a few tears start down his cheeks. He sniffs. “Pervy Sage tried to tell me the first time, you know? He tried to save me from any future pain. But I…I didn’t listen…” he barely bites back a sob, “…and I can’t even tell him that hindsight’s a <em>bitch</em> and I know he’s <em>right</em> now because…” He has to close his eyes and purse his lips tightly as more tears sting and fall.</p><p>His shoulders quake. “I was <em>alone</em> for so long…but I’m not anymore. I have <em>so</em> many people in this village…and even in the Sand…I’m lucky enough to call my <em>friends</em>. They support and love me, no matter what…even when I screw up. They’re <em>precious</em> to me. I…I want to protect them…and show them the same care and love they’ve shown me…more than <em>anything</em> else in the world…” A few sobs escape he can’t hope to keep back. He’s never told <em>anyone</em> this next part before. “They…they <em>saved</em> me...”</p><p>Shikamaru’s heart beats like a drum in his chest. He always knew they were important to Naruto. He’d be the biggest idiot on the face of the planet if he didn’t know that. But somehow, hearing how <em>deep</em> that gratitude and devotion go (and knowing <em>why</em>)…it hurts and heals at once. <em>It’s the same for all of us, Naruto</em>, he swears. <em>We love you, too.</em></p><p>He swallows thickly, working to rein himself in. “I-I want…to focus on <em>them</em>, on the ones who love me for me and would never hurt me like he has…on—on <em>loving myself enough</em> to let him go and move on.” Wiping his eyes and face, he looks at them again. They <em>burn</em> with blue fire, and the smile he gives them is strong and hopeful and never-say-die. “I <em>know</em> I deserve that much, at least. I deserve <em>something</em>, damn it.”</p><p><em>No, Naruto…</em> they can’t help but think. <em>You deserve <strong>everything</strong>.</em></p><p>“And if I can have you and all of them?” he closes softly. “Then I have everything I’ll ever need,” he pats his heart, “right here.”</p><p>A heartbeat, two, three, and then Tsunade smiles, wiping her own eyes. “Like master, like student, I see.” She reaches forward to ruffle his hair feather-lightly, not wanting to hurt him. He laughs and leans into her touch anyway, pain be damned. “I’m so proud of you, Naruto.”</p><p>Naruto beams toothily. “Thanks, Granny!”</p><p>Shikamaru, for his part, takes a deep breath and sighs like it’s something he’s been keeping inside for years (and he has), his whole body sagging with the force of his relief. Looking back at Naruto, there’s a gentle smile on his face. “You know the rest of us wanted to take out Sasuke ourselves a long time ago. Sakura aside, we hold no love for the guy,” he clenches a fist lightly, fighting the urge to grit his teeth, “<em>especially</em> after everything he’s done to you. That said,” he sighs again, shorter and lighter this time, smile growing, “I’m really proud of you, too, and I’m happy for you.” He softens. “You <em>deserve</em> to be happy, Naruto, and I think this is the best way to start.”</p><p>Naruto’s beam <em>blinds</em>. “Thanks, Shikamaru! You’re the best!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Jiraiya's lines/advice about Sasuke from Naruto's dream that Tsunade later repeats are from <i>Naruto</i> episode 135, "The Promise That Couldn't Be Kept!"</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Close to Home</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Iruka takes Naruto's decision well. Kakashi and Sakura, on the other hand...are a little more complicated. (Part 1)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I meant to have this up <i>way</i> sooner, like 3-4 days after the last one, but one of our young family dogs started having <i>violent</i>, awful seizures out of <i>nowhere</i>, which freaked us the hell out, so it's been an <i>incredibly</i> stressful week over here! Lots of sleep deprivation, haha! Still, I did my best on this chapter, so really hope it's okay!</p><p>Since this is an emotional 'arc,' if you will, I didn't want to overwhelm anyone with an 8k+ chapter, so I decided to split it into two chapters! This is the first!</p><p>
  <i>A note on any possible weirdness in Sakura's characterization during-confrontation can be found at the end!</i>
</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Once things settle down, Tsunade has Naruto eat what he can of a healthy, light dinner and then gives him something to help him sleep. Naruto isn’t exactly thrilled.</p><p>“I know, all you’ve been doing is sleeping lately and staying still isn’t your forte,” hell, anywhere near it; Tsunade smirks all too fondly, “but right now, you need to heal, and good sleep is the best way you can do that. I’ve already given the nurses more with instructions to give it to you after dinner the next few days, and I’ll check you over again after that to see if it needs to continue.” She pokes his forehead, gentler this time. “And I’m serious, Naruto: if you need <em>anything</em>, no matter what or when, please don’t hesitate to ask.” She winks. “Being the Hokage has its perks, you know!”</p><p>The medicine she gave him works quickly, so while he hears everything and appreciates it a lot, he’s already yawning and his eyelids are drooping by the time she’s done. Tsunade helps him lie back down, and he smiles with a whisper-quiet “Thanks, Granny…”</p><p>The last thing he remembers before drifting off is her hand in his hair, her voice saying “Sweet dreams, Naruto,” and her kiss on his forehead.</p><p>He ends up sleeping through the rest of the night and the entire next morning. When he wakes up a few minutes after noon, he’s feeling better. Not by much, but it hurts a little less to move, and he’s less fatigued than he was before. Honestly, he’ll take what he can get.</p><p>He’s partway through his brunch when, once again, there are rapid footsteps in the hallway coming toward his room. He raises an eyebrow at Shikamaru, who shrugs in taking back his bed-tray and smirks easily. “You’re a popular guy, Naruto, and I told you how worried everybody’s been. I’m sure they’ll all be breaking down the doors to come see you soon enough.”</p><p>As if on cue, the door slides open so hard it ricochets, and a sweaty, heavily-breathing Iruka Umino steps into the room, leaning on his knees to catch his breath. He doesn’t look up for a second or two, almost like he’s afraid he won’t see what he desperately wants, but when he does, his eyes widen.</p><p>Naruto beams. “Iruka-sensei! Good morn—!”</p><p>He blinks, and Iruka’s standing in front of him, fists clenched at his sides and tears gathered at the corners of his eyes. He looks like he’s at war with himself, caught between hugging the crap out of him and giving him the lecture of his life. Naruto braces himself.</p><p>Figures he’d go for both.</p><p>“<em>You</em> <em>idiot</em>!” Naruto cringes. Yep, there it is. Shikamaru winces in empathy. “What the hell were you thinking, jumping into a fight like that?! You could have died! You almost <em>did</em>—!” The blond flinches at the crack in his voice, the way he’s started trembling, too. “Do you have <em>any</em> idea how worried I was? How worried we <em>all</em> were? You should have <em>seen</em> Kakashi and Sakura when they brought you in! Covered in blood, paler and more panicked than I’ve ever seen them! Kakashi is a silent panicker, but it’s there if you know what to look for, and once you were taken care of, he was on the verge of an attack! Hell, he might have given in to it after he disappeared to be alone, I don’t know! And don’t even get me <em>started</em> on—on how <em>you</em>—!”</p><p>His voice splinters again, he chokes on a sob, and that’s when a tear lands on Naruto’s sheets. The boy looks up to see that more of them have started flowing down Iruka’s face, and he feels a sharp pang in his chest. Sure, he knew this was coming, but that doesn’t make it any easier. He <em>hates</em> making him cry… “I-Iruka-sensei…I…—!”</p><p>He’s cut off when Iruka hugs him like there’s no tomorrow, just like he knew he would. It’s a little painful, but Naruto knows it’s just payback for scaring the crap out of him, so it’s pretty fair. It’s not like he’d ever <em>actually</em> hurt him anyway. He soaks up the comfort he offers like a sponge, returning the embrace as best he can. “I came every day…” his former teacher tells him softly, voice slightly raspy and wobbly, the way it always gets when he cries. “I waited here…for hours f-for you to wake up. I couldn’t…stand seeing you like that, w-when I couldn’t do anything to help you… I…I <em>hated</em> it…”</p><p>Naruto’s shoulder is wet again, way more than with Granny Tsunade, but he was expecting that, too. He doesn’t mind at all. If anything, he feels guilty and horrible for scaring him so badly, the others, too, but also so incredibly, indescribably <em>lucky</em> to be so loved. He wouldn’t trade interactions or moments like this for anything in the world. “I’m sorry…”</p><p>Iruka nods and sniffs, but keeps going.  He needs to get this out. He’s kept it in for far too long. “I was <em>so</em> worried… L-Lady Tsunade said you should wake up on your own, but…we’d never seen you like that… Y-you weren’t healing either, at least not—not like you normally do, so…w-we weren’t sure what to expect…” He swallows thickly. “But—but she’s the one who told me…you were finally awake… She told me your healing is still slow, but you’re—y-you’re going to be okay now…” His heavy sigh is shaky in its relief, a happy sob catching the end. His voice is barely more than a whisper. “<em>I-I’m so glad</em>…”</p><p>All things considered, Naruto takes it like a champ.</p><p>They stay like that for a good few minutes, just happy to be in each other’s arms again, to hold each other again. At their side, staying in his own lane as best he can, Shikamaru can’t help but smile. These two are pretty funny together, he’ll give them that. There’s no denying they’re good for each other, though, and as long as Naruto’s happy, that’s good enough for him.</p><p>When they finally pull away and compose themselves, the smile that comes to Naruto’s face is apologetic, but touched and adoring, too, a peculiar combination. “Yeah, I…I’ve heard about how worried everyone was… I’m sorry. I never meant to scare anyone. I just…all I could think about was protecting Sakura and Kakashi-sensei…and…” his voice drops, “…and trying to… convince Sasuke to come home…” His smile, while still pained, shifts partway into accepting and determined, and while Shikamaru is proud, if hurting for him, Iruka is surprised and concerned. “But…I know how stupid I’ve been now. Sasuke…he’s not coming back, and I’m…working on accepting it…”</p><p>Okay, <em>now</em> Iruka is worried. “The Naruto I know wouldn’t say that…let alone take it so well...<em>if</em> at all…” he says, brow furrowing slightly. He takes a heavy seat on the bed at Naruto’s side. “Is there something you want to tell me?”</p><p>Naruto half-freezes and hesitates for a long moment, and Shikamaru double-checks the mostly-open set of his shoulders and the nervous (not scared) look in his eyes before deciding he’ll be okay without him. Standing up, he does his best to be discreet in heading for the door, but Naruto leans around Iruka anyway to call, “Shikamaru! Where you goin’?”</p><p>The shadow user looks back over his shoulder, a reassuring, part-teasing grin on his face. “I’ll be right outside if you need me, but I’m not about to intrude on this. I know better than anyone that father-son heart-to-hearts are nothing to mess with.”</p><p>Iruka instantly goes red and speechless, mouth dropping open slightly. Naruto cocks his head, not really getting it, but then he gasps a second later and squawks, “W-wait, <em>what</em>?! Did you just call Iruka-sensei my <em>Dad</em>?!”</p><p>Shikamaru smirks. Of course he did. He’s not an idiot, after all. He’s known since they were kids that there was more to their relationship than just a teacher-student bond. He’s a genius who holds <em>all</em> the cards – so he will gladly lay them down as he pleases.</p><p>This is one of those times.</p><p>Already on his way out the door, he gives a lazy wave without looking back. “I know what I said!”</p><p>The door slides shut, and with that, they’re officially alone. Silently thanking Shikamaru for this, Naruto takes a deep breath.</p><p>Well…here goes nothing.</p>
<hr/><p>Somehow, getting everything out a second time, while still hard and painful as hell, is easier, if just slightly. He doesn’t cry nearly as much this time either. Naruto calls it progress.</p><p>“I see,” Iruka says once he’s finally done, and Naruto’s grateful to find nothing but thoughtful acceptance in his tone. Despite Shikamaru’s reassurances, there’s always the worry in the back of his mind that the others will be pissed and hate him for his decision. “And you’re <em>sure</em> about this?”</p><p>Naruto gives him an utterly baffled look. “What’d’ya mean? I thought you’d be happy...”</p><p>The chunin waves his hands in front of him sheepishly, a nervous laugh escaping him. “O-oh, I am! You have my full support, don’t worry!” He sighs a bit, some of the tension leaving his shoulders. “To be honest, when you two were kids, I never imagined things would turn out like this. I knew there was a rivalry between you two, at least on your side, and I could tell he had some problems, but nothing that would incite him to…” he gestures to Naruto, the action and what it means making his stomach churn, “…do <em>this</em>.”</p><p>Naruto gives a sardonic huff of a laugh. “You’re tellin’ me…”</p><p>Iruka nods. “And I admit, as you’ve grown, it’s always terrified me, the way you chase after him. I lie awake sometimes and worry that, one day, when you leave the village…you won’t come back. You’ll <em>keep</em> chasing him, to the point where I’ll never see you again…or….” Given their situation, he can’t bring himself to say the other option aloud. This was already way too close for anyone’s comfort. He shakes his head to clear it and gives his charge a small smile. “I’m happy about your choice, though, I promise. Relieved as hell, actually. I just…” his smile slips, a more serious expression overtaking it, “…I want to make sure this is what you <em>want</em> and that you won’t change your mind later. This is…a big decision, after all. If you go back on it after this…” He doesn’t even want to to <em>think</em> about how Naruto’s friends would react, namely Sakura and Shikamaru.</p><p>Naruto’s eyes flash, his expression perhaps more earnest than Iruka’s ever seen it. “I <em>won’t</em>. I <em>never</em> go back on my word, remember?” Of course, that makes him think of his promise to Sakura, and he cringes, but he pushes that aside with a clenched fist. He’ll tackle that later. “I’m <em>serious</em>. I’m not going to change my mind. I’m done giving everything for someone who doesn’t want anything to do with me.” A heartbeat, and then he shakes his head and softens, a small smile blooming. “I want to be here for you and Shikamaru and the others. You’ve always been there for me, and Sasuke…he never even made it to the starting line.” A cleansing breath, and he melts further, smile growing. “I love you guys too much to worry you anymore, good intentions be damned. I’m really sorry I ever did it in the first place.”</p><p>Iruka pulls him into another hug, this one much softer. “Don’t you dare apologize. You have <em>nothing</em> to be sorry for, son.” Naruto’s eyes widen at that last, heart stutters in his chest, tears sting his eyes, but he doesn’t bring attention to it. It’d ruin it. He just hugs him back as tightly as he can and burrows into his chest. Iruka rests in Naruto’s bright blond hair, a small smile on his face. “You wanted to help someone you considered a friend. You thought you could save him from the darkness. There’s nothing wrong with that. You don’t think Master Jiraiya was wrong for trying to save Orochimaru, do you?”</p><p>Naruto shakes his head quickly. “No, of course not. He was…”</p><p>“Just doing the same thing as you? Exactly.” One hand starts to card through the tiniest of blond waves at the nape of Naruto’s neck. Kushina’s influence, he’s sure. “Despite what some enemies may say, there’s nothing wrong with having a good heart, Naruto,” he holds him a little tighter, “and <em>you</em> have the biggest, best heart of all.” He presses a kiss to his hair, unable to help himself. He’s just so, <em>so</em> happy he’s alive. “That’s something to celebrate. Everyone who loves you certainly does.”</p><p>Naruto sniffs and smiles wider, nodding into his safe, warm chest. He wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. “Thanks, Iruka-sensei… You’re the best.”</p><p>Iruka’s not surprised at the sudden compliment, but a light blush still dusts his cheeks. He chuckles happily. “Y-you’re welcome. Thank you, too.”</p><p>They keep talking while Iruka makes sure Naruto finishes his meal, and then, around 2:30 in the afternoon, Iruka reluctantly tells him he has some business to finish at the Academy before evening, so he has to go. Before he does, though, Naruto has a favor to ask.</p><p>“Iruka-sensei? If it’s not too much trouble…would you mind telling Kakashi-sensei and Sakura that I need to talk to them? I…” he fixes his eyes on his sheets, curls a light fist in them; his heart pounds at the very idea, “…I need to tell them…w-what I’ve decided…”</p><p>The man is about to respond when someone flashes into the room. “No need, Naruto,” the newcomer says, clicking his book shut. There’s an amused tone to his voice. “I’m already here.”</p><p>Naruto brightens. “Kakashi-sensei!”</p><p>Iruka laughs, rubbing the back of his head. He <em>thought</em> he’d sensed Kakashi’s presence materialize in the tree outside a few minutes ago. “H-hello, Kakashi. It’s good to see you.”</p><p>The jounin nods in polite greeting. “Iruka. Good afternoon. You don’t have to worry about Sakura either, by the way. I’ve already sent Pakkun to fetch her. I appreciate the offer, though.”</p><p>Iruka nods. “Of course!” Then, though, he remembers, “Oh! But didn't you just get back from helping the ANBU a few minutes ago? Don't you want to eat and get changed first?”</p><p>Kakashi hums noncommittally. “Eventually,” he concedes with a shrug. “But—” he plops a hand on Naruto's head and ruffles his hair, making the boy beam and laugh, lean into it, “—my number-one knucklehead of a student is more important.”</p><p>Naruto’s learned to read his sensei over the years. He can hear the warm smile in his voice, see the way his good eye’s closed in his joyful amusement. It just makes him smile more.</p><p>Iruka melts, seeing this. They’re so different, but they make a good team. “Understood. If you need anything, you know where to find me.”</p><p>Kakashi nods. “Got it. Thank you.”</p><p>Shikamaru, who’d sneaked back in during Kakashi-sensei’s arrival (a Kakashi clone had told him it was okay), just watches with his chin in his hand, expression helplessly adoring. Naruto really is the sun... Everyone always revolves around him.</p><p>Iruka bows politely. “Forgive me, but I really should get going.”</p><p>Kakashi raises a hand in farewell. “Good luck with your grading. From what I’ve heard, you have quite the rowdy class this year.”</p><p>Iruka laughs tiredly. “That’s an understatement… And here I thought Naruto and his class were a handful…” Naruto and Shikamaru trade glances and fist bump each other, snickering and huff-laughing respectively. Turning back to Naruto, the man smiles sympathetically, pride there, too. “All right, Naruto, I’m heading out. Take it easy, and listen to Tsunade and the staff, you hear me? I’ll hear about it if you don’t, and you won’t like how I come down on you.” Backing up toward the door, he stops and promises with a big grin, “Oh! And once you’re well enough, we’ll go to Ichiraku Ramen together! My treat to celebrate your recovery!”</p><p>“<em>Woohoo</em>! You’re the best, Iruka-sensei!”</p>
<hr/><p>Once Iruka’s gone, things go quiet. Naruto’s eyes fall, and his chest feels tight, like he’s afraid to take a full breath. He’s…nervous, to put it mildly. Not as much about telling Kakashi-sensei as Sakura, but…there’s still some fear of backlash.</p><p>“So…how much did you hear out there?” he asks quietly, not really feeling like beating around the bush. Hell, maybe this still counts as that, but…well, he wants to know anyway.</p><p>Kakashi doesn’t react to Naruto sensing him outside. He’s not surprised. Instead, he reaches up to scratch his head with the corner of his book in thought before slipping it into his pouch. “I got here when Iruka was…telling you not to apologize? For what, I’m not sure.” He shrugs, leaning back against the wall. “I could hazard a guess, and I’m confident I’d be right, but to be honest, I’d rather hear it from you. We should wait for Sakura to get here, though. I sent Pakkun for her when I heard things winding down in here, so she should be here soon…” he pauses, looking to the side and crossing his arms over his chest, “…I hope, at least.”</p><p>Naruto’s ears perk at that. He narrows his eyes in confusion. “Wait, what’s that mean? ‘I hope’?” An awful thought hits him, and he sits up a little straighter and clenches his sheets some, eyes going wide. “H-hold on—she’s not hurt or anything, is she? Shikamaru said you two got out fine, so—”</p><p>Kakashi waves calming hands toward the floor, doing his best to keep his voice low and comforting. “Whoa, whoa. Calm down, Naruto. We’re both in perfect health, no need to worry. We were barely touched in the fight, and what few scrapes and bruises we had healed in a few days or so.” He smiles gently. “But thank you. We appreciate your concern.”</p><p>Naruto sighs in relief, shoulders sagging with it. “Thank goodness…”</p><p>Kakashi’s smile grows a smidgen before it fades. He returns his hands to his pockets. “I only meant that Sakura’s been holed up in her house ever since that day. She refuses to speak to any of us, and according to her parents, she’s been irritable and crying. She hasn’t been eating or sleeping well either. Basically, I think…she’s having trouble processing everything.”</p><p>“Something like this would be hard for <em>anyone</em> to process,” Shikamaru offers, rubbing his head; he’s been trying to stay out of this, Team business and all, yet some outside perspective seems like it might be beneficial here, “but especially for a teammate in a situation like this.” Naruto’s gaze snaps to him, and the blond can’t help softening. He doesn’t know what it is, but...something about Shikamaru always makes him feel at ease. Always has, really, but…he’s noticing it more and more the older they get. (And don’t think for a second Kakashi doesn’t notice.) “I can’t imagine Choji or Ino turning on me, for example, and I’m sure it’s the same for them. Honestly?” He fixes normally-sharp brown eyes, now soft and concerned and almost reverent, on Naruto’s bright blues, a small, kind, protective smile on his face. “I don’t know how you do it, Naruto.”</p><p>A heartbeat, and Kakashi nods. “Shikamaru’s right. After what Sasuke tried to do to her, what she witnessed him do to you without hesitation, having you nearly die more than once under her care… While there’s no doubt she’s an amazing medical ninja, we also know she’s always been more emotionally sensitive than most. This is, for lack of a better word, a special case that hits very close to home, to her heart, in a few different ways. So, all that being said…” he sighs, “…I’m just not sure if she’ll actually come. She might throw Pakkun out or slam the door in his face, maybe the window if he goes that way.” He shrugs. “I wanted to warn you, Naruto, because I didn’t want you to be too disappointed if she doesn’t show.”</p><p>Naruto looks down at himself, at all the bandages, remembers what Shikamaru told him about how Sakura helped save his life, and he smiles sadly. “Don’t worry, I understand. If she doesn’t come today, then…” his smile grows the way it does when he’s trying to be positive while his heart’s hurting, “…I’m sure she will eventually! She’s strong and smart like that! She’ll figure it out!”</p><p>As if on cue, the door slowly slides open, and Pakkun comes through…with a dazed-looking Sakura. She’s even paler than usual and definitely doesn’t look like she’s been eating or sleeping well at all from the dark bags under her red-rimmed eyes and the slight indent to her cheeks, but honestly, Naruto was afraid she’d be a lot worse. Kakashi, too.</p><p>Naruto smiles softly and waves his good hand in greeting, not wanting to bother her with his usual loudness. “Hi, Sakura.”</p><p>Sakura perks up at the sound of his voice, green eyes lighting up a bit. “N-Naruto?” Looking around, she only just seems to realize where she is, and when she sees Naruto, everything stops. Tears invade her eyes, start down her cheeks, and the next thing he knows, she’s hugging him like crazy. Like teacher, like student, indeed. “<em>Naruto</em>!”</p><p>He manages a laugh through the very tight, also painful hold she has on him, wrapping a gentle arm around her. “H-hi, Sakura… L-long time, no see…”</p><p>Naruto’s keen ears pick up on Kakashi and Pakkun talking near-silently behind them, and while he’d like to know what they’re saying since it’s almost certainly about Sakura, he does his best not to eavesdrop. He can always ask after she leaves or something. Not that he <em>wants</em> to talk about her behind her back, but…if she won’t tell him, he needs to find out how she’s doing somehow.</p><p>“I-I was so <em>worried</em>…” Naruto tunes back in when he hears her voice, tightening his hold some when he feels her shaking. “I-I was so afraid… I-I’ve been—having nightmares…about—about Sasuke and…a-and you… I’d wake up screaming…a-always your name…c-crying my eyes out… E-every time, I close my eyes, I…I see you dying in—in my arms again—!” She breaks off on a sob and has to take a minute to cry to get her breath back. Naruto just holds her, rubbing her back in a way he hopes will soothe her. “I-I wanted to…I wanted to come see you e-every time, but…it was past visiting hours, and I…b-by the time my parents got me back to sleep, I…I was too afraid to c-come during the day…a-afraid my nightmares were real… It was…it was <em>awful</em>—!” Her voice drowns in another sob, and he shakes his head, swallows, holds her closer. “I’m—I’m so sorry…”</p><p>Eyes snapping open wide at that, Naruto draws back just enough to stare at her. “<em>What</em>? What are you apologizing for? Sakura, without you, I <em>would</em> be dead! Even with Granny Tsunade’s help, she might not have been enough by herself! The way I heard it, it took you, Granny, <em>and</em> the Nine Tails to keep me alive! You’re <em>amazing</em>!”</p><p>For a moment, Sakura looks like her world’s just been rocked, but given another, she smiles through her tears. “Thanks, Naruto.”</p><p>Naruto’s expression goes soft and empathetic. “If it makes you feel any better…I had a nightmare about Sasuke the other night, too.” He nods toward his bedside companion. “Shikamaru had to wake me up and calm me down.” His smile warms with gratitude and adoration just looking at him, and it shows in his voice, too. “He was the <em>best</em>.”</p><p>Shikamaru’s cheeks color instantly, and even as he looks away to hide his embarrassment, he can’t help the small, shy, happy-touched smile that paints his lips.</p><p>Sakura breathes a laugh, more than she has in days, they’re sure, and it sets them at least a little more at ease. Thank goodness. “I’m sorry you’ve been having nightmares, too. But still…I’m even happier that you’re okay. I’m…” she has to choke back another sob, but he doesn’t mind, “…I’m <em>so</em> happy…”</p><p>Shaky legs unable to support her anymore, she sits down heavily on the bed and hugs him again as she finally breaks down. He holds her a little tighter, reaching up to sift his fingers through the ends of her hair. Letting her get it all out now will probably help her in the long run. “I’m glad you’re okay, too…” he whispers. So much more than she knows. “I was worried about you and Kakashi-sensei…”</p><p>They stay like that for several minutes, and once she’s cried herself dry, she composes herself as best she can. When she smiles again, it’s still tiny, but bigger than it was before, so Naruto counts it as a win. “Now…Pakkun said you have something important to tell us. What is it?”</p><p>Instantly, Naruto’s smile and mood plummet, his heart and the color in his face, too. Shikamaru reaches over to set a strong, knowing hand on his shoulder, and when Naruto looks at him, so anxious and uncertain, even scared, it tears at Shikamaru’s heart something fierce. He only feels worse for him when Naruto reaches up to squeeze his fingers for strength and purchase with shaky ones of his own.</p><p>Steeling himself to be the rock his friend needs, Shikamaru flips his hand over to return the squeeze with a stronger one and offers an encouraging smile and nod. <em>I’m right here</em>, he tells him silently, steadfast and unflinching.</p><p>Finally, Naruto takes a deep, if tremulous, breath and, returning his smile and nod, swallows before turning back to face them.</p><p>“It…it might be hard to hear, but…just hear me out, okay…?”</p><p>It goes about as well as he expected.</p><p>He’s barely finished the last word when Sakura’s <em>leaping</em> from her seat like it’s burned her, fists trembling with rage at her sides, unable to even look at him. Naruto tenses sharply. “What the <em>hell</em> are you talking about, Naruto?!” Her voice is a low growl, not the sharp yell he was expecting, but this is almost worse.</p><p>“S-Sakura, I—!”</p><p>She snaps up, eyes furious and fierce and blinded by tears that are already streaming down her face. “You promised you’d bring him back to me! You <em>promised</em>! I thought your Ninja Way said you’d never go back on your word! Where’s that now, huh?”</p><p>Naruto flinches at that, even if he already knew it was coming. She’s not wrong, after all, not…really. <em>This</em> is exactly what he was afraid of, though, that she’d take it just like this. He remembers the first time he failed to bring Sasuke back, how she pretended everything was fine even through his many apologies, and it…it <em>hurt</em>, even more than her yelling at him now does. He thinks it’s because she was lying to him then, closing off her heart instead of being open with him, like she didn’t <em>trust him</em> anymore, and now… They’re older and stronger and hopefully wiser, and she knows she can’t try to run off to fix it by herself this time, so…she’s done pretending. As messed up as it is, he thinks…he might <em>prefer</em> this.</p><p>“Sasuke is part of Team 7! How can you even call yourself his <em>friend</em> if you give up on him like this?” He winces, looking away. “How can you just <em>abandon</em> him?” He cringes, closing his eyes. “How can you just be a—a promise-breaker because things <em>got too hard</em>?!” Naruto clenches his teeth so hard that they groan, curls his good fist so tightly that nails start to bite into skin. “He’s lost his way, he talks crazy, but that doesn’t mean he’s beyond us! We can still—!”</p><p>“<em>He tried to </em>kill<em> you</em>!” Naruto bursts out in an almost-roar, unable to take her berating anymore, her defense of Sasuke no matter what. That stops her tirade in its tracks, the whole room and what feels like the whole world coming to a standstill. He grits his teeth to try to hold back the rage he still feels at that, blue eyes on fire. “He <em>would have</em> if I hadn’t been there! Kunai <em>straight</em> through your neck—!” His voice breaks. He wants to be sick at the very thought.</p><p>It’s like a reality-slap to the face for her. She steps back, trembling, but only half with rage this time. She—she knows that, remembers that, but—!</p><p>“He was <em>never</em> our friend, Sakura!” he implores, voice a touch softer now, looking her right in the eyes, blue on green. She wants to look away, but his gaze is too compelling. “<em>Think</em> about it – and I mean, <em>really</em> think about it. Did he <em>ever</em> say we were anything but annoying and pains in the ass? Did he ever tell us happy birthday? Did he ever even say <em>hi</em>?” Shikamaru blinks, understanding dawning. He was confused about this train of thought at first, but now he thinks he gets it. This must have been part of Naruto’s own thought process in coming to his decision about Sasuke. Smart. “He saved me once and you a few times, I’ll admit that, but was that <em>really</em> for your benefit or because <em>he said</em> his body moved on its own like he did with me?” No answer, but her lower lip trembles as more tears flow. That’s what he thought. “Did he <em>ever</em> treat us well at all, like <em>friends</em>, even a little bit? Because I was there the whole time, and if he did, <em>I</em> don’t remember it. How about you?”</p><p>Sakura shakes her head vehemently, tears flying. “That’s not— h-he didn’t know how to interact, connect! H-he was alone, orphaned young! How could he—?!”</p><p>“So was <em>I</em>!” He laughs bitterly, almost offended that she would even use that excuse. “I was even more alone than he was! He had a family for a few years, at least, and even when he didn’t, everyone still liked and admired him because he was handsome and always so good at everything! Meanwhile, <em>I</em> grew up <em>completely</em> alone with almost the entire village hating my guts and wishing me dead just for <em>existing</em>!” He has to take a moment to catch his breath after that, chest heaving. Shikamaru reaches over to rest his hand on his white-knuckled fist. There’s obviously still a lot of pent-up rage and pain there, not that Shikamaru expected any different. Hell, he still wants to kick the villagers’ asses himself. He squeezes. A heartbeat, two. When Naruto speaks up again, he’s quieter, a little calmer. “I’m not saying that to compete with him like this is some kind of sick competition. I’m just saying that we were <em>both</em> alone, and you don’t see <em>me</em> trying to carve out your voicebox.” The younger two flinch at the imagery in the pissed-off fury of his voice, Kakashi looking away guiltily.</p><p>“<em>How</em> can you still defend him, Sakura? How can you still <em>trust</em> him? <em>How</em> can you still want to say you’re—you’re <em>in love</em> with him after what he’s done?!” Tears gather in Naruto’s eyes and begin to streak down his face. He looks as heartbroken as Sakura feels. It’s the first time since this started that he’s shown just how broken these pieces of himself really are. “I told you I’d bring <em>Sasuke</em> back. That was the promise I made you, wasn’t it?” A tense silence. “Well, I can’t do that now. The Sasuke we knew doesn’t <em>exist</em> anymore! You know that, too, don’t you? You just can’t admit it to yourself!”</p><p>
  <em>WHAM!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Drip…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Drip…</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Drip…</em>
</p><p>Pain explodes in his nose, red dyes the sheets, and Naruto’s world comes to a grinding halt.</p><p>Shikamauru and Kakashi are on her like a shot, the brunet stepping between her and Naruto and trapping her with his Shadow Paralysis jutsu before she can blink. "Sakura, what the <em>hell</em> do you think you're doing?!" he demands, all snarls and protectiveness.</p><p>At her side, Kakashi has <em>tight</em> hold of her wrist and is glaring <em>hard</em>. It’s clear to all who know him that he’s <em>pissed</em>. “Sakura. That’s <em>enough</em>.”</p><p>That seems to snap her out of her livid haze, and her eyes widen when she gets a good look at what she did. Naruto’s nose…! She…she just <em>broke</em> <strong><em>Naruto’s</em></strong> <em>nose</em>…! The blood rushes from her face, tremors overtaking her. She…she hurt her <em>teammate</em>…the teammate who <em>saved</em> her life…whose life <em>she</em> saved in turn…! She’s a <em>medical</em> ninja! She’s—she’s supposed to be the support and <em>save</em>, never <em>hurt</em>! What is she <em>doing</em>…? What did she just <em>do</em>…?!</p><p>“N-Naruto, I…” For a moment, she forgets she’s caught in a jutsu. She tries to reach for him, but Shikamaru’s shadows don’t let her move more than a millimeter, if that. It’s still enough to make Naruto flinch away from her in a way he never has before, dulled eyes fixed on the small, but growing blood pool in his lap, and it all hits home in a way that makes her want to be violently sick. She purses her lips as tears start falling, struggling against the paralysis and managing to pull just slightly on her wrist. She <em>does</em> have Tsunade’s monster strength, after all. “Let me go,” she begs, pulling harder. “Let me <em>go</em>.” It’s weaker this time. “Please…” it drops to a shaky whisper, “…<em>let me <strong>go</strong></em>.”</p><p>Kakashi and Shikamaru lock eyes, and with a second’s silent conversation, they back off as one. She’s gone in a flash.</p><p>There’s a tense, pregnant silence in the room, all of them still shocked at what happened. Kakashi watches Sakura run off down the street, while Shikamaru immediately drops onto the bed beside Naruto with tissues in hand, surprisingly gentle fingers guiding his head back and helping him apply light pressure to his nose to try to staunch the bleeding.</p><p>As for Naruto himself, he closes his eyes and does his best to let the tension leave his shoulders as he sighs heavily, heavier than they’ve ever heard. Shikamaru’s still-pounding heart sinks even lower in his chest, and even <em>that's</em> nothing compared to the shadowed expression on his face. “You okay?” he asks, scarcely above a whisper.</p><p>“Yeah…” The word is quiet, slow, and meticulously measured, and even if it weren’t, he’s in a room with two geniuses adept as hell at reading people. They know he’s lying, and he knows they know. But they don’t push. If he needs to talk, he will. They can wait.</p><p>It’s quiet for a good few minutes while things calm down. Then, a deep breath.</p><p>“This is messy, but it’s real,” his voice is soft and low, a little raspy from the yelling and crying, “and that's...part of the healing process, too.” A heartbeat, and he breathes a laugh, a tiny, half-sad, half-nostalgic smile coming to his face, tears he has to swallow back stinging at the corners of his eyes. Shikamaru can’t help but immediately empathize, already knowing what this is. Missing your master… He understands better than anyone else ever could. “At least, that's what I try to tell myself… Something else Pervy Sage taught me…”</p><p>“It’s good advice,” Kakashi encourages. Shikamaru nods in agreement, concentrating on keeping Naruto’s nose elevated. He’s made peace with the fact that he’s an open book when it comes to Naruto a long time ago, so there’s no need to go to the trouble of repeating himself.</p><p>“Yeah…” the blond agrees quietly, “…it is. When Pervy Sage wasn’t being a creepy old man, he could be really wise.” He chuckles, looking out at the setting sun. “Sakura…she’ll come around eventually. She just…needs some time. I believe in her.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>About Sakura's characterization here (<i>no</i> hate on Sakura/SasuSaku ship is intended, but just in case!): I struggled with writing her argument for continuing to try to get Sasuke back for two days before I realized why I was having so much trouble - <i>because Kishimoto himself never rationalized it</i>! He just banked on 'loving Sasuke' being enough and his excuse of being unable to write women as butt-cover, which...means I had to navigate that illogical mess myself! lol. So, I did my best, and hopefully it's good enough!</p><p>Also, my month-long work leave is coming to an end as of today, so sadly, I have to return to my 2.5 'essential' jobs tomorrow. T__T That said, I don't know if I'll be able to keep up my motivation and energy enough to update <i>as</i> regularly as I have been, but I promise I'll do my best! I'm so excited for this fic, already have a lot of future scenes planned out! Just wanted to warn you guys, though, in case I suddenly don't/can't update as often! Hopefully you understand!</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0004"><h2>4. From the Root</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ino pulls a despondent, wayward Sakura inside for a good, long talk. Sakura, like Naruto, comes to grips with a few things that have been a long time coming. (Part 2)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is the 'Sakura figures her shit out' chapter! lol. I tried to make her realization as organic and real as Naruto's, but obviously there's a different kind of weight to hers since she's 'in love' with Sasuke, so...hopefully I succeeded! There <i>is</i> a Sakura-Sasuke relationship analysis toward the end-ish, and again, while it's not bashing Sasuke, per se, like with Naruto's, it doesn't exactly read favorably on their relationship either, so if you like Sasuke or SasuSaku, read at your own risk! That said, hope it's all right!</p><p>Don't worry, we'll be getting back to the Kakashi stuff in the next chapter! ;D (Originally, I was going to have the Kakashi stuff and the resolution to Sakura's 'arc' in this chapter, too, hence this chapter taking so long ('cause I was working on that stuff, too), <i>but</i> that was fit to turn into a 9-12k monster, and I didn't want to subject you poor readers to that, haha, so I broke up the chapter <i>again&lt;</i> to leave two hopefully-about-equal parts. On the bright side, that means a good chunk of the next chapter is already written! lol. To think that last chapter, this one, and the next were originally supposed to be short scenes in the same chapter! Hahaha! ;))</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Sakura finally stops running about halfway through town, lungs on fire and fit to burst. She doesn’t pause to catch her breath, though, just keeps walking. She needs to cool off somehow. Besides…</p><p>Her fists, tightly-balled at her sides, are still shaking, but not out of blind rage anymore. It’s out of shame, fear, and anger at <em>herself</em> now. One of the shop’s lights brings attention to something bright red on the back of one, and she slowly uncurls it to get a better look.</p><p>There’s <em>blood</em> on her hand. <em>Naruto’s</em> blood.</p><p>Her hand shakes even more, and she’s not surprised when a few tears fall on it. She feels sick.</p><p>She still can’t <em>believe</em> she did that… She broke her teammate, her <em>friend’s</em>, nose…! What the <em>hell</em> was she <em>thinking</em>? No matter how pissed she was, he didn’t deserve that! She…she’s a bitch and a total disgrace to the role of medical ninja…! She’s a total disgrace to <em>Lady Tsunade</em>…! She pales when she thinks about what her teacher’s going to do to her when she finds out. She totally deserves it, though…</p><p>What did Naruto even <em>say</em> that upset her enough to make her snap like that? It’s not like he wasn’t telling the truth, not…really... The Sasuke they grew up with and the one they saw weeks ago…they <em>weren’t</em> the same person. Sasuke’s always been dark and goal-oriented, yes, but…not like <em>that</em>. That was…he was talking <em>crazy</em>, and that’s…not even counting that he…he tried to…—!</p><p>“Hey, Sakura!”</p><p>Sakura freezes mid-step and snaps up to see Ino waving at her from her clan’s flower shop across the street, dressed in her shop apron with a few pots scooped in her arm. She must be on shift right now. She’s grinning widely, and something about that and the flower shop’s calming aura draw Sakura in.</p><p>“You sure are a sight for sore eyes!” Ino reaches up to wipe some sweat from her brow, her gardening gloves leaving a streak of dirt across her forehead. Sakura can’t help but snort a bit and point, and Ino reaches up a little farther to get it with her sleeve, thanking her before getting back on task, hand on her hip and beam in place. “I haven’t seen you out and about in almost two weeks!”</p><p>Sakura breathes a laugh and gives a small returning smile, but they’re shadows of her usual. “Yeah…” she replies, barely above a whisper. Her gaze falls to the wayside. Maybe…coming over wasn’t the best idea… Ino’s bright and boisterous…reminds her almost too much of Naruto right now…</p><p>A lightly-calloused hand closes around her wrist, and she hears a <em>tsk</em> as she’s pulled forward. “You look like something the cat dragged in, you know that?” Before she can protest, Ino cuts in, “And don’t you try to deny it! You know it’s true!”</p><p>Puffing out her cheeks, she pouts. “Maybe, but you don’t have to <em>say</em> it…”</p><p>Ino chuckles, stopping once they get to the cash counter so she can put the ‘Closed’ sign out. Gently pushing Sakura down onto a stool, she reaches under again to pull out some makeup and hair accessories with a grin. “If you’re not gonna take care of yourself, <em>someone</em> has to!”</p><p>Half an hour later, Sakura is slowly polishing off a plate of fruit and cookies Ino put out while waiting for her friend to finish her work. It’s more than she’s eaten in a while, and she’s grateful. She already feels a little better, like she can think a little clearer. Blotting one more spot under her eye, Ino finally draws back with a triumphant “<em>And</em>…done!” Flipping open a compact, she holds it out so Sakura can look at herself. “Here! What do you think? I think you look great!”</p><p>Sakura takes it and blinks wide eyes. “<em>Wow</em>, Ino…!” She turns her head from side to side to get a better look. Ino’s worked hard to give her skin back some of its natural color and added the tiniest bit of blush to her cheeks, covered up the red puffiness around her eyes and the dark shadows under them. The red hairclip taming her most unruly fringe is a nice touch. “You’re right! I look better than I have in days! Thank you so much!”</p><p>Ino laughs delightedly, sticking her tongue out. “See? I know what I’m doing!”</p><p>Taking the compact back, she packs up the rest of the supplies and puts it away, grabbing more food before sitting back down. Don’t think she hasn’t noticed how malnourished Sakura is, her cheekbones more prominent than she can ever remember seeing. She knows all about what’s been going on with her, too, or at least as much as Sakura’s parents have been able to tell her in short bursts. Besides Kakashi-sensei, she was the first one to try to visit her when this whole mess started.</p><p>Leaning on her arms, she fixes her childhood best friend with a gentle, but serious stare. “So, now that we have you <em>looking </em>better, how about we get you <em>feeling</em> better, too?”</p><p>Sakura pales, and her heart sinks in her chest. She drops her gaze again. She’s not sure she wants to get into it so soon. She’s still…so ashamed…</p><p>A poke to her forehead. She looks up. “Should’ve known you couldn’t fool <em>me</em>, billboard brow,” Ino admonishes with a wink, a proud, yet still gentle, smirk on her face. “I <em>saw</em> that look before you came over, you know. You’re miserable, and I want to know why.” Sakura winces and wilts in one, and Ino knows to keep going or she’ll clam up entirely. “As your best girl friend, it’s my job to notice these things! Then, of course, hear you out and cheer you up,” she waves dismissively, “maybe chew you out if need be. So, spill.” She points at her, narrowing her eyes. “I mean it. I’m not letting you leave here without getting it off your chest.”</p><p>Sakura gulps. Hell, she wouldn’t put it past Ino to use her novice-but-still-promising Psycho Mind Transmission jutsu on her if it came to that…which just reminds her of how pissed and protective Shikamaru was when he used his Shadow Paralysis jutsu earlier… Sheesh… Talk about a couple of watchdogs. She hasn’t seen that kind of behavior from Choji herself, but she’s heard he can be protective as hell when he wants to be, too. She supposes that’s just another reason the three of them make such a good team.</p><p>Taking a deep breath, she sighs heavily. There’s obviously no way she’s getting out of this, and she knows from Inoichi’s work that the easy way is <em>much</em> more preferable. It’s now or never.</p><p>“Well…I don’t know if you know yet, but…Naruto’s awake…”</p><p>Ino gasps and leans forward, an ecstatic grin on her face. “Wait, he is? Are you serious?” Sitting back, she puts a hand over her heart as she sighs in relief. “Oh, finally! Thank goodness! He’s never been out <em>this</em> long after a fight! I was really starting to worry he’d <em>never</em> wake up!”</p><p>Unable to help smiling a little, Sakura nods. Ino’s always cared a lot about other people, especially her friends, and she finds it really sweet that she was so worried about Naruto. She feels a little bad about not being around to comfort her.</p><p>“Yeah, he’s…he was awake and seemed totally coherent, so…that’s good, I guess …”</p><p>Ino brightens even more. “<em>What</em>? You mean you already got to <em>see</em> him?” Then, she laughs at herself, waving a hand. “Oh, wait, what I am saying? Of <em>course</em> you did! You’re teammates, and you <em>know</em> how worried he must have been when he remembered what happened! I’m sure he asked for you and Kakashi-sensei first thing!”</p><p>Despite herself, Sakura smiles some and softens. “Yeah, he…he did…”</p><p>The blonde snaps her fingers. “<em>Ha</em>! Knew it!” Sobering, she leans forward again, fingers fidgeting the way they do when she’s thinking about having to perform medical ninjutsu. “And he really looked okay? You mean it?”</p><p>Sakura blinks. She doesn’t think she’s ever seen Ino this earnest about a recovery before. Then again, this is one of the only times they’ve ever had one of their own so close to death. Her eyes fall back to Ino’s hands, and she softens further. The fidgeting… She really wants to help Naruto, doesn’t she?</p><p>She nods, smile growing a bit and even breathing more of a laugh, spurred on by Ino’s kind heart. She waves her hands in her own defense. “Yeah, he really did, I promise!  He’s still pretty banged up since his healing, advanced or otherwise, is mostly at a crawl, but he doesn’t seem to be in that much pain. Lady Tsunade and I are keeping him on some pretty high painkillers, and she’s making him sleep as much as possible.” Her gaze drifts, smile slipping a smidgen. “It…looked like Shikamaru’s been taking really good care of him, too.” Unlike her…</p><p>At the reminder that her teammate’s been camping out at Naruto’s side these past weeks, Ino can’t help but giggle, shaking her head fondly. Really, that boy… “Oh, that doesn’t surprise me at <em>all</em>.”</p><p>Sakura raises an eyebrow and tilts her head. Is…she missing something? “What do you mean?” She knows they’re friends, but she didn’t realize they were so close…</p><p>Ino mirrors her head tilt and shrugs. “You know, with how much Shikamaru admires him and all.” Suddenly, that thought in mind, an idea strikes, and she gasps and springs to her feet, giggling excitedly. Looking around at her huge selection of flowers, she waves at her friend to get her to continue, mind whirring a mile a minute. “Keep talking, keep talking! I just had an <em>awesome</em> idea!” She rubs her hands together, unable to contain her joyful relief. “I’m so happy he’s doing well!”</p><p>Sakura’s still confused about this apparent connection between Naruto and Shikamaru, but she can ask about that later. She knows if she doesn’t get to the heart of her funny mood soon, florist-brain switched on or not, Ino will get impatient, and an impatient Ino is <em>never</em> fun.</p><p>“Yeah, so, anyway, when I went to see him earlier, he was quieter than usual,” she smiles a little and laughs a bit more, “but I think that was for my benefit. He could probably tell I wasn’t feeling my best. He was…” she softens, “…really sweet, though, held me so gently and let me cry as much as I needed to.”</p><p>Ino snorts a bit. “Don’t tell me you’re surprised! He’s your teammate and one of your closest friends, and he’s always been pretty sweet when he wasn’t yelling about being Hokage.” She chuckles. “His long-standing crush on you aside, he really loves you, Sakura. Of course he’d be that way with you when he finds out you’ve been hurting, too. I’m sure all he was thinking about was how much he wanted to be there for you.”</p><p>Ino’s facing away from her, so she can’t see the way Sakura is visibly feeling worse and worse the longer Ino goes on about how good a friend Naruto is. She’s right… She’s totally right… Which just reinforces the fact that she’s <em>really</em> gonna get it when Ino hears what she did…</p><p>“Y-yeah…I know…” Ino’s not an idiot. She can hear the unease and apprehension in Sakura’s voice. But she doesn’t stop or turn around, just lets her go. She wants to know what’s going on, and she knows the fastest way to do that is to let her get it out. “Anyway, then I remembered Pakkun saying Naruto needed to tell Kakashi-sensei and me something, so I asked about it. He…got really nervous and scared all of a sudden, and then after Shikamaru calmed him down…he said…”</p><p>She falters here, biting her lip. Ino was her rival for Sasuke’s affections when they were younger, sure, but she’s moved on since then, and she was also one of the ones who wanted to go after Sasuke and take him out herself. So…maybe she shouldn’t say…? But then again, if she doesn’t tell her herself, she’s going to find out on her own terms, so… <em>Geez</em>…</p><p>Ino, for her part, just keeps gathering what she needs, trusting her to talk when she’s ready. Finally, there’s a shallow, shaky breath.</p><p>“He said…he wants…” she can barely breathe past the weight of these words; no wonder Naruto had so much trouble getting them out, “…to give up on Sasuke…”</p><p>Ino freezes, nearly dropping the flowers in her hands in shock. <em>Oh</em>…! Well, that’s…<em>not</em> at all what she was expecting… “Okay…so…what’d you do?” She’s careful to keep her voice even and low. She doesn’t want to freak her out or make her think she’s judging. She won’t pass judgment until she knows all the facts. That’s something her Dad taught her a long time ago.</p><p>“I…I…”</p><p>Sakura mumbles something, but Ino doesn’t hear what. “Sorry, I didn’t hear you. What’d you say?”</p><p>“I…I hit him…” Ino goes still again, but for a very different reason this time, her protective instincts buzzing at light speed under her skin. Sakura’s voice shakes as she clenches her fists tightly, digging her nails into her palms. “I…I <em>broke his nose</em>, Ino…”</p><p>It’s silent for a long few furious-flower-picking seconds, and Sakura doesn’t dare break it, doesn’t even dare to breathe.</p><p>“You did <em>what</em>?!” Ino finally shrieks. Sakura flinches. She was expecting it, but still.</p><p>
  <em>BAM!</em>
</p><p>“<em>Ow</em>!” Sakura clutches her head. “Hey, Ino!”</p><p>Ino glares down at her, chest heaving. “How’s that feel? Not good, huh?” Sakura blinks. “And <em>you</em> deserved it! <em>Naruto</em> didn’t!”</p><p>Sakura reels back, hurt, yet also effectively chagrined. She doesn’t say anything, though, at least not yet. She can tell Ino’s not done, and she knows better than to interrupt.</p><p>“The rest of us gave up on Sasuke a long time ago! Are you going to hit <em>us</em>, too?”</p><p>Sakura’s eyes widen, and she shakes her head quickly. “N-no, I—of course not!”</p><p>Ino turns on her heel in a huff, fists clenched tightly. She brings out an orange vase and starts putting the flowers in, arranging them just so. Besides her sense of purpose feeling renewed in this endeavor for her injured friend, she also needs something to do with her hands so she doesn’t wring her best friend’s neck. “Honestly? I'm relieved as <em>hell</em>, and I know the others will be, too! It always scared the crap out of us, what might happen to him one day, you know?”</p><p>This time when Sakura doesn’t respond, it’s more out of not <em>knowing</em> what to say. It’s always scared her, too, but…she always thought he’d succeed and bring Sasuke back one day, so… Was she…was that selfish of her? Naïve? She looks down at her now-clean hands, remembers the way the blood, <em>Naruto’s</em> blood, turned the water red as it washed down the sink. Her stomach churns, and she has to bite her lip hard to keep it from trembling.</p><p>Ino’s own hands slow in their work as she thinks back over the years, glancing over at Sakura as she makes her next points. She doesn’t miss her guilty fixation on where Naruto’s blood stained her skin. “When Sasuke first left the village, I thought it was temporary, you know? That once Naruto got to him, he’d use his Emotional Intelligence jutsu and get him to come back.” Ino chuckles, even more so once Sakura’s incredulous look comes into play. “Sorry, that’s just something the others and I’ve nicknamed his thing where he talks to our enemies and makes them realize they’re wrong. It was actually Shikamaru’s idea of a joke that just…kinda stuck.”</p><p>Clearing her throat, she sobers. “I’m serious, though. I really thought that would be the end of it. I think we all did. But then, when Naruto came back beaten to hell with a huge <em>hole</em> through his chest, on the verge of <em>death</em>, and we found out <em>Sasuke</em> was the one who did it to him…” she frowns deeply, brow wrinkling, and she has to actively remind herself not to crush the innocent flowers in her hand in her protective rage, “…that’s when we decided that was it. Sasuke wasn’t one of us anymore. We were done.”</p><p>A heartbeat. Her voice lowers, a light, warm, almost reverent quality to it Sakura’s seldom heard. The smile on her face matches. “Shikamaru was the first. It was like a knee-jerk reaction for him, instinct or in his bones or something. I’ve known him my whole life, and I’d seen him angry before, of course, but never like <em>that</em>… It was actually pretty scary. He was like a demon out for blood or something. The only other time I can remember him being that scary since was…” her voice dips some more, “…after Asuma-sensei was killed…”</p><p>Sakura sits back, taking it all in as best she can. “I…I never knew about that…” It all makes so much more sense now, why the others would be so ready to go after Sasuke and put him down themselves, why <em>Shikamaru</em>, of all people, would be the one to resolutely stay by Naruto’s side.</p><p>Ino shrugs. “We didn’t exactly want you to know. We knew how you and Naruto still felt about Sasuke, so…we didn’t want to upset you. Honestly?” She sighs a bit. “We thought you guys would’ve given up on him way before now…”</p><p>Sakura looks away again, shoulders slumping. It feels like everyone’s against them – or just her now, it seems… “I see…”</p><p>It’s silent for a few long moments while Ino gathers her thoughts. Then, quietly, gently, but also sternly because she knows this is something her friend needs to hear, “Chasing Sasuke like this…it’s not healthy. It never has been. You know that, right?” Sakura curls into herself a little more. She…on some level, she does, but…she can’t… <em>How</em> can she just…? “<em>Especially</em> for someone like Naruto.”</p><p>Sakura snaps up at that, eyes wide, and instead of seeing Ino and her little flower shop, she sees her memories of Naruto replaying in her mind’s eye. Naruto, who’s always been alone, who’s so touch-starved it actually <em>hurts</em> to see, who’s always yearned for even the tiniest shred of attention and affection and love, who’s always been the kind to all-too-willingly drag himself through the fires of Hell and back if it means he can save someone he loves.</p><p>“It was always going to lead here. It was always going to end up this way,” Ino goes on. “Look at the signs, <em>really</em> think about it. Remember how Sasuke was growing up, what you <em>saw</em> in him that day he and Naruto fought right in front of you. There wasn’t a single thing that was ever healthy about <em>any </em>of this.” A heartbeat, blue eyes bearing into green. Just like with Naruto… “Even <em>you</em> have to know that.”</p><p>Turning back to her flowers to give her friend time to reflect, Ino takes them out to cut the stems, and then puts them back in the now-watered vase. She fluffs them a bit, wanting to make sure her babies look their best for their intended person.</p><p>Sakura…isn’t sure how to feel, what to do. Ino has a point. A few of them, actually. Really good ones. It’s hard enough admitting that. So…what does that mean…? Is she as wrong as all this makes her sound? Has she…her promise really put that much horrible pressure on Naruto? She knows that’s not the only reason he’s kept going after him, it was for himself, too, but...she’s at least halfway responsible. Does this…make her love for Sasuke wrong, too…?</p><p>“Personally,” Ino pipes up after a few minutes, nothing but adoration and relief in her voice, “I'm really glad Naruto finally understands the way things are, even if it <em>did</em> take him nearly dying <em>again</em> to see it."</p><p>Sakura stiffens at that, heart beating faster. She clutches the small table between them till her knuckles turn white, yet she’s still careful to be mindful of her strength. No matter how pissed she is, she doesn’t want to add property damage to her list of mistakes tonight. “‘The way things <em>are</em>?!’” she repeats, tone sharp and biting. She glares fiercely, denial flashing white-hot through her veins. “What the hell is <em>that</em> supposed to mean?”</p><p>Ino turns to her, but doesn’t answer right away. She studies her expression and body language and purses her lips. She’s guessing this is how she was with Naruto, too. Leaning back against the counter, elbows cradled in her palms, she says, “Can I ask you something?” Momentarily thrown out of her ire by the sudden question, Sakura raises an eyebrow, but nods. “What made you fall for Sasuke anyway? What did you like about him?”</p><p>Sakura’s eyebrow just climbs higher, even more confused now. “What do you mean? He was super smart and hot and the coolest boy at the Academy. You remember, don’t you?”</p><p>Ino nods a few times, waving a hand. “Well, yeah, of course! But those are givens!” She flips her hair. “What else?”</p><p>Sakura opens her mouth to respond, but then has to close it. She opens and closes it several times for a good thirty seconds, wracking her brain for something, <em>anything</em>, she can say, but…she ends up not saying anything. She can’t. No matter how hard she tries, she finds she doesn’t…<em>have</em> an answer…</p><p>Thinking back to when she was a kid, even when she was on a team with Sasuke, there’s…nothing but what she just named. Sure, she was infatuated with him, but…in the Academy, she hardly ever talked to him out of shyness for the first few years, and once she finally started, all she did was fawn over him. She was no better than those other fangirls of his, really. And even then, it’s not like he ever gave her or anyone else the time of day. Even back then, he was focused entirely on getting his revenge.</p><p>Even when they were both assigned to Team 7, she still fangirled and wanted to be around him all the time because she thought he was so cool. But…he still never really paid attention to her in return, not the way she wanted him to, at least. All he ever did, even on missions, was call her annoying and stay as far away from her as he could.</p><p>Looking back on it, on her side…she never took the time to get to know him for <em>him</em>. She never asked how he was feeling, never thought about the pain he must be feeling, never made an effort to try to help him with his grief. Of course, she highly doubts he would have told her anything or let her get close anyway. He probably would have bitten her head off for even attempting. She remembers the one time she was stupid and ignorant enough to say Naruto was only a brat because he didn’t have his parents around, Sasuke blew up at her and stormed off. He was right that time, but still… She thinks…that might be the longest, most meaningful conversation they’d ever had…</p><p>So…what <em>was</em> she ‘in love with,’ then, if it wasn’t his personality or his heart, his soul? Was it all talk? Was <em>she</em>? With no basis for it that she can see…</p><p>“I…I don’t <em>know</em>…!” she admits softly, semi-tremulously. She feels like her whole world’s been turned on its head. First with Naruto, and now all this… “I don’t think it was so much <em>him</em> as…what I <em>thought</em> he was, how…cool he was in my head. I thought…I thought…” she rests her head on her knees, draws them closer to her chest, feeling her heart sink lower with every (<em>true</em>) word, “…if I could show him how much I cared about him, I…I could change him…make him forget about his revenge… I thought…he’d become what I…who I thought he <em>could</em> be, who I…<em>wanted</em> him to be…” God, she sounds so selfish and deluded…but at least she knows better now… Damn it, what is <em>wrong</em> with her…?! “But…” she swallows thickly, not even realizing she was about to cry until a few tears make their way down her cheeks, “…I was <em>wrong</em>…!”</p><p>Ino finishes picking the last of her flowers and, after tying a bright blue ribbon around the orange vase and a pink ribbon around the new bunch, comes over to sit down beside her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. Sakura takes the offer of comfort gladly, resting her head on her best friend’s shoulder as the tears keep coming. And here she thought she’d already dealt with the trauma… “He…h-he tried to <em>kill</em> <em>me</em>, Ino…! Y-you should have <em>seen</em> the look in his eyes… I-it was like he—he didn’t even <em>care</em> that we were teammates… He just—he wanted to take out the Leaf and everyone in it… It didn’t matter to him…w-who or why… A-all he could see was his goal, and he…” a harsh sob leaves her as this last realization hits her, what Naruto said to her echoing in her head, “…he let revenge taint his soul… H-he <em>chose revenge</em>…o-over the Leaf…over <em>us</em>…a-all those years ago…a-and <em>this</em> is the result…!”</p><p>With all this weighing on her mind, it’s only natural that she’d also look back at the other end of the spectrum. Naruto…</p><p>Sure, he was an obnoxious idiot back in the Academy, but she knows now that that was mostly just for the attention. He’d take any attention he could get, even if all it did was make Iruka-sensei yell at him and the other kids groan. He just…wanted to be acknowledged, remind anyone who would listen that he was more than just the Nine Tails’ vessel, that he was a <em>person</em> with a heart and dreams and feelings. When he wasn’t doing that or (hilariously badly, now that she thinks about it) flirting with her, though, and especially once they were put on Team 7 together, he was…always nice and supportive, there for her. <em>Saving</em> her.</p><p>Even now, years beyond all that, he’s <em>stayed</em>, never left her side, and that’s…something Sasuke’s never done. Throughout all their years together, Sasuke’s really…<em>never</em> stood by her at all, never mind at her back. That was always <em>Naruto</em>…</p><p>Ino lets her cry it out for as long as she needs to, not caring that her shirt and apron are getting wet. They’ll dry, and helping Sakura is more important. This realization has been a long, long time coming, and frankly, she’s relieved it’s finally happening. She’s sure Naruto broke down similarly, not that Shikamaru would ever tell her for fear of betraying his trust. In the end, she’s sure the two of them will come back stronger and better than before, together <em>and</em> apart.</p><p>Forty-five minutes later, Sakura finally starts calming down. Ino hands her a few more tissues and rubs her shoulder, but she can’t stop herself from quietly advising, “You don't meet a great guy like Naruto every day, you know. Maybe you should try not taking him for granted for once, billboard brow.” She pokes her forehead once more, gentler this time, to drive the point home.</p><p>Sakura sniffs and isn’t surprised when a few extra tears fall. Combined with what she was thinking about before…she really has…taken Naruto <em>completely</em> for granted all this time, hasn’t she…? The one person who’s never left her side, never left her hanging, has always done everything in his power to be there and keep every promise he’s ever made to her, even when they’ve almost gotten him killed… The <em>truest</em> friend she’s ever had…</p><p>She’s the <em>worst</em>…</p><p>Letting Sakura think on that, Ino gets up, grabs both bunches of flowers she picked out, and comes back to carefully balance the orange vase of flowers in her friend’s lap. “You go back there and apologize and give him these. Shikamaru will know what they mean.” Ino crosses her arms and points at her, eyeing her seriously. “You’d <em>better</em> get down on your knees and <em>beg</em> for his forgiveness, or so help me!”</p><p>Sakura breathes a laugh despite herself and waves her hands in front of her. She knows Ino’s not kidding, but… “I-I will! I was already planning on it!” She really was, too, she’s not just saying that. Remembering the way he flinched away from her, though, she frowns, arms tightening around her knees. “But…even if I do apologize…” She looks down at her hands. “Ino, after what I did…” She glares, closing a tight fist around the tear that lands in her palm. “All I’ve ever done with these hands is hurt him… Sure, I saved his life this time, but today…you should have seen how scared he was of me, of what I did, at least... I wouldn’t blame him if he didn’t accept my apology...if…” her voice drops, and a few more tears fall, “…if he never wants to see me again…”</p><p>Ino tilts her chin up with gentle fingers, an encouraging smile lighting her face. “Hey, don’t look so sad. Just start with ‘I’m sorry,’ and I’m sure the rest will fall into place. If you really work hard to show him how sorry you are and how much he means to you, I’m sure you guys can patch things up!” She wipes away her tears with careful thumbs. “Besides, this is <em>Naruto</em> we’re talking about. He loves you, Sakura. You’re one of his best friends, one of the most important people in his life. There’s no way in hell he’d <em>ever</em> turn you away like that. Just have some faith in him, okay?”</p><p>A heartbeat, two, and Sakura breathes a cheered-up laugh, a small, warm smile coming as she picks up the orange vase and holds it close. “I really hope you’re right… <em>Thanks</em>, Ino…”</p><p>Ino walks her to the shop’s edge and makes sure to hand her the bouquet with the pink ribbon, too. “These are for you.” She hugs her best friend tightly, and Sakura returns it as best she can with her hands full. She’s missed her more than she thought. “Feel better, okay? It’ll be fine with Naruto, I promise. Just don’t be a stranger from now on, you hear me? We miss having you with us.”</p><p>Sakura softens. Ino really is so kind… She nods dutifully, a brighter smile than she’s given in recent memory lifting her lips. It feels good. “Right! Thanks, Ino. I will. I’ll let you know how it turns out, I promise.”</p><p>“You’d better!” Ino play-shoves her in the direction of the hospital. “Now get outta here! Visiting hours are just about over!”</p><p>Hurrying down the street, Sakura half-turns to wave over her shoulder. “Have a good night! Thanks for everything!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Chapter title references how it not only takes place at a flower shop, but Sakura's named after a flower (tree flower, but still, lol) <i>and</i> they're getting to the <i>root(s)</i> of her problem (you also pull out <i>weeds</i> (in this case, Sasuke) by the root, so :P). :D</p><p><i>Question:</i> What do you guys prefer? A short 5k chapter or a longer chapter? Asking for the next chapter. Opinions would be wonderful! Thank you!</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0005"><h2>5. Those Who Stay</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Hours earlier, back at the hospital, Kakashi decides it's time to finally do right by Naruto and let loose some very important truths. Alternately: Even senseis need comforting sometimes. (Part 3)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>First things first! I published <b>chapter 4</b> of this fic on <b>May 22nd</b>, the day after all this AO3 server maintenance/email crap-out started, so if you didn't get the update email for and, thus, read that one, if you wouldn't mind reading (and maybe commenting to let me know how it was, if you feel so inclined?) that one before this one, that would be much appreciated! Thank you so much! ;)</p><p>Now that that's out of the way, this chapter has been a bitch and a <i>half</i> (which you might have noticed by how long it took me and the higher-than-usual word count)! lol. I ended up rewriting parts of it, like, three or so times! LMAO! I think I'm finally happy with it, though, so here you go! This <i>was</i> meant to be the last part of this 'arc,'  but...yeah, that didn't happen (and I <i>still</i> didn't fit in everything I wanted to address either! Pfft! Maybe I'll fit it in somewhere later or smth). The <i>next</i> chapter will be the conclusion to this 'arc,' and then we can get to other exciting things! &gt;:D Excited for that! Hopefully work doesn't kill me too much this week so I can work on it more peacefully than I could this chapter! lol. Thanks <i>so</i> much for your patience! Much appreciated! Hope you enjoy this chapter!</p><p><b>Important note for this chapter/this whole fic, really:</b> I got the timeline a bit skewed in my head. In my defense, I haven't watched the majority of Naruto in at least two years. lol. Anyway, I could have <i>sworn</i> the Pein arc happened <i>after</i> ep 215, and yet, I found out recently that it's the other way around... But by that time, I already had most of this chapter written and I already had kickass plans for this fic <i>involving</i> the Pein arc, so...whoops? lol. <i>So</i>, I'm gonna be switching things up a tiny bit as far as that goes, just FYI! Mainly in the sense that, in this AU, instead of the Pein arc having already happened <i>pre</i>-ep 215, it <i>will</i> happen in the future in a few months' time, <i>post</i>-ep 215!</p><p><i>But</i> this way, the way I have it planned, at least, Naruto will have time to master Sage jutsu completely this time (or more completely? lol.), he and Kurama will have made some interesting relationship progress, he'll know who his Dad is on sight (IF that still happens, we'll see), there won't be nearly as much destruction and death, and man, do I really hope you guys like my plans for this arc 'cause they are gonna <i>wreck your feels</i>! Just fair warning! (Won't be implementing it for a while, probs, but still!)</p><p>Any (not rude) thoughts on that idea/those plans would be appreciated! Thank you!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Meanwhile, hours earlier back at the hospital, Naruto’s been pretty quiet since Sakura left. Neither of his friends expected much else, though, and they trust him to talk when he’s ready. On the bright side, much to Shikamaru’s relief, they’ve finally gotten his nose to stop bleeding with a few pointers from Kakashi.</p><p>“Where’d you learn that, Kakashi-sensei?” Naruto asks curiously, wiping off the last of the blood with the damp tissues Shikamaru hands him.</p><p>Kakashi huffs a laugh in that quiet, half-hearted way Naruto’s learned means he’s accidentally touched a repressed-memory nerve, and his heart pangs. He hates doing that. It felt the same way when he asked him who the White Fang of the Leaf was during their mission to rescue Gaara. Kakashi rests his head against the wall to stare upward, at the ceiling or maybe somewhere far above it, just like back then, too. Naruto wonders what he sees, what he’s looking for, when he does that. “Just…something an old friend taught me.”</p><p>Naruto smiles softly and nods, but stays quiet, understanding. He has questions – he’s <em>always</em> wanted to know more about his introverted sensei – but he doesn’t want to bring up any more painful memories for him.</p><p>Shikamaru takes the pink-tinged tissues from his hand, and that reminds Naruto that he never actually heard what Kakashi-sensei thought of his decision. His smile falls victim to his nerves, but he takes a silent breath and does his best to steel himself. At the very least, he knows Kakashi-sensei won’t hit him.</p><p>“Kakashi-sensei?” The man looks over at his soft, careful voice. “I…you never said…how <em>you</em> feel about…” He trails off, eyes falling as he bites his lip, his worries for once getting the better of him. He’d hate it if…if Kakashi-sensei was angry with him, too…</p><p>“About you giving up on Sasuke,” Kakashi finishes, a statement, not a question. Naruto hesitates a half-second, holding his breath, but nods. His teacher sighs, scratching his head. “Honestly, Naruto, as complicated as this looks, for me, it’s not.” A meaningful pause, in which Kakashi’s black eye locks tight with Naruto’s bright blues. A small, reassuring smile comes. “Do you remember the first lesson I taught you?”</p><p>Naruto blinks at the sudden question, but nods immediately, even as his brain hurries to catch up. “Y-yeah, of course.”</p><p>“And…?” Kakashi prompts, a sort of sing-song. His tone might make him sound amused, but Naruto knows he’s serious. He’d never poke fun at his Ninja Way. Neither would Naruto.</p><p>“‘In the ninja world, those who break the rules are scum. That’s true. <em>But</em>…” he smirks something fierce, eyes glinting with resolve, “…those who abandon their friends are <em>worse</em> than scum.’”</p><p>Kakashi’s smile grows, heart warming at the fact that he even remembered it word for word. This kid... “Correct!”</p><p>Naruto beams at even that small praise, and at his side, just silently observing, Shikamaru can’t help but smile softly in turn. So that was their first lesson, huh? Seems like something Kakashi would instill in them, and he absolutely expects Naruto to latch on to something like that with everything he is. It just makes the blond even more charismatic, in his opinion (<em>and</em> endearingly troublesome, a new kind he’s surprised to find he honestly doesn’t mind). Shame it fell on deaf ears in Sasuke’s case, though.</p><p>As if reading his mind, Kakashi goes on. “That said, Naruto, I mean it when I say I’m happy and relieved as all hell about the choice you’ve made. I’m also very proud of you. Not everyone would choose the path you have. Most that I’ve seen in your position abandon everything for the one they’re chasing, don’t take the time to look around at what they have, those who’ve stayed, and choose <em>them</em> over the deserter.” He softens a little more, voice with it, maybe turns the slightest bit pained and nostalgic, while his smile grows fonder. “It’s admirable. It really is. You don’t know how much.”</p><p>To say Naruto is relieved is an understatement. He just stares at Kakashi for a long moment, so touched he can’t even speak. Then, a slow, toothy grin lifts his lips, and he’s not really surprised when tears sting the corners of his eyes for a different reason than before. He feels like he can breathe again, like a huge weight’s been lifted off his chest. “W-well, I can’t say it was an easy decision, but…I’m—I’m really happy you approve, sensei.” He has the grace to look sheepish as he scratches his cheek, smile matching. “You were the one who tried to tell Sakura and me that Sasuke wasn’t the person we knew, that his intent to kill was…” he glances down at himself and gestures for emphasis, a wry laugh leaving him, “…undeniable… I didn’t want to believe it, I guess…and then, when things went bad, I just wanted to protect you guys…but still…”</p><p>He looks back up at him, guilt hollowing out a sharp space in his chest. He remembers what Iruka said about the panic attack Kakashi could very well have suffered on his behalf. “I’m so sorry for all the trouble I caused. I didn’t mean to scare you, I swear.” He bows as low as he can in his current state, pain be damned. “Thank you so much for staying by me all this time, sensei.”</p><p>Kakashi blinks a wide eye, but then breathes a laugh and shakes his head. He gives Naruto a soft smile. “You have nothing to apologize for, Naruto. That kind of change in a person… It’s hard to believe until you see it for yourself. I don’t blame either of you for being in denial, for thinking you could still save him even then.” He melts a little more. “You don’t have to thank me either. I’m your sensei. It’s my job to be here for you.” His eye narrows and words slow a bit as a thought suddenly occurs to him... “But even if it weren’t, I’d still…do my best to be here…”</p><p>It could be Naruto’s imagination, but he swears he feels something in the room, maybe the world, shift all of a sudden, like a deadbolt sliding into place. He’s not sure what it is, but…it feels <em>big</em>.</p><p>Gears turning in Kakashi’s mind, he straightens from his lean against the wall and looks at Naruto with a kind of <em>fire</em> in his eye. The boy’s eyes widen. He feels like he’s being <em>charged</em> with something...</p><p>“<em>Which</em> is why…” he sighs heavily, rubbing the back of his neck, “…I need to apologize to you, too, Naruto.” Naruto opens his mouth, wanting to protest, but Kakashi holds up a hand. “I broke my own rule. You’re my student, yes, but you’re also my comrade and my friend, and in focusing on training Sasuke years ago, I effectively abandoned you. It won’t excuse anything, but…if you’ll let me, I’d like to explain.” A big-picture plan is starting to come together in his mind, and he can’t keep back a wicked smirk. “Actually, there are <em>many</em> things I’d like to explain,” his eye flits between them, “<em>if</em> you boys don’t mind indulging an overworked, under-rested sensei.”</p><p>Shikamaru, for his part, leans back in his chair, fingers locked behind his head. He has no idea what this is about, but he can feel it’s big, too. Excited, mischievous anticipation buzzing under his skin, his smirk matches Kakashi’s. “This oughta be good.”</p><p>Glancing at him out of the corner of his eye, Naruto follows him in relaxing. He’s confused, but he trusts Shikamaru, and he trusts Kakashi, too. If he says he has something important to tell him, he knows he does. He nods. “Okay, sensei. I’m listening.”</p><p>Kakashi takes a deep breath, deeper than he has in a long time. He’s quiet for a long few moments as he thinks, thumb and forefinger curled at his chin. “To be honest, I’m not sure where to start. There are so many things I need to tell you...” He hums. “But I suppose the best place would be to finish what I started.”</p><p>He fixes his eye on Naruto again. “Like I said, I need to apologize to you for the way I focused on training Sasuke for the Chunin Exams. You probably thought I was just worried about him facing the old Gaara.” Naruto nods, but raises an eyebrow. That must mean there was more to it, but…he can’t imagine what. Kakashi guiltily appreciates his innocence, almost wishes that was really how it was. “While that <em>was</em> part of it…it was more than that.”</p><p>He stands a little taller. “Despite what you went through growing up, despite having every reason in the world to hate this village and its people, you were such a <em>good</em> kid at heart, Naruto. You had people you cared about who cared about you, and I knew those bonds were something you wouldn’t throw away for anything. I was more than confident I didn’t have to worry about <em>you</em> falling into darkness.”</p><p>Naruto looks away shyly, a happy, touched smile painting his lips. Shikamaru, watching, softens. He’s got that right…</p><p>“But Sasuke…” Kakashi frowns deeply, “…he <em>wasn’t</em> like you. He didn’t accept any of the bonds offered here, even with his own teammates. All he saw were the bonds he lost, the sullied bond of revenge with Itachi the only one he saw as worth anything. <em>He</em> worried me like nothing else, so I put almost all of my time and effort into trying to keep him from straying.” He mentally kicks himself for this for the thousandth time, curling into himself some. “I didn’t realize at the time how badly I was neglecting you and Sakura. You both had to find teachers of your own because I wasn’t there for you the way I should have been…” He sighs wearily, scrubbing a hand down his face. “In short, I wasn’t a very good sensei to you, nowhere near what I should have been, and I’m sorry.” He bows as low as he can. “I’m so sorry. I don’t expect you to forgive me, but…I just needed you to know.”</p><p>There’s a long moment of stretching silence. Naruto’s pretty sure he’s forgotten to breathe. Then, “What…what are you <em>talking</em> about?”</p><p>The sheer shock and incredulity in his voice make Kakashi snap up, eye wide, and he slowly straightens as Naruto elaborates.</p><p>“Kakashi-sensei, if I really thought you had anything to apologize for, if there was anything at all to forgive, I’d tell you. But there’s <em>not</em>. The fact is, what you did…” He looks down at his bandaged hand and closes his eyes, can’t help falling tender. Shikamaru watches him closely. He’s remembering Master Jiraiya a lot lately. He hopes it heals more than hurts. When Naruto looks up at Kakashi again, his grin is bright and gentle at once. “I got to spend some of the best years of my life training with Pervy Sage, and Sakura finally got to channel her strength and smarts into something she loves with Granny Tsunade. It ended up being the best possible thing for us.” He chuckles. “No offense, but you couldn’t have taught us what they did. It would’ve been pretty funny to see you try, though.”</p><p>Kakashi, even as shell-shocked as he is, can’t say he’s really <em>surprised</em>. This is <em>Naruto</em> they’re talking about, after all. He’s always seen things a little differently, and especially in situations like this, maybe it’s for the best. He chuckles and finds himself smiling. “Yes, I suppose you’re right about that. I’d look ridiculous trying to spit toad oil…”</p><p>Naruto snickers right along with him just imagining it, Shikamaru joining in.</p><p>“Besides,” the blond continues after a moment, “Sakura and I are still here, right? If we really hated you for all that, we wouldn’t be.” His smile turns a bit sad, maybe a little guilty, but it’s empathetic to the utmost, too. “The truth is, sensei…Pervy Sage told me a long time ago that it was always going to be this way with Sasuke. He said it was destined to happen, and…looking back…I think he was right. All the signs pointed that way. I just…didn’t want to listen, and apparently,” he points to his nose, a small laugh escaping, “Sakura’s even worse than me.” Blue eyes kind, his expression turns gentle, yet firm. “So please, don’t blame yourself for Sasuke’s mistakes. It <em>wasn’t</em> your fault. It would have happened with any of the other senseis, too. I’m <em>sure</em> of it.”</p><p>He tilts his head a bit, his loving, devil-may-care beam coming back in full force. “I wouldn’t want anyone else for a sensei anyway. You’re the only one I’d ever accept. I’m so happy and grateful to have you in my life.” A heartbeat, and then the <em>softest</em> look overtakes his face, voice following. “I <em>love</em> you, Kakashi-sensei. Thank you for <em>everything</em>.”</p><p>A split second, there’s a flash, and the next thing he knows, Kakashi-sensei is hugging him. <em>Kakashi-sensei</em>. <em>Hugging</em> him. He can’t remember if he’s ever done it before, but in his defense, he’s pretty sure his brain is overloading with disbelief and joy. Given a moment or two, Naruto finally snaps out of it enough to hug him back as tightly as he can, burying his face in his middle and breathing him in.</p><p>“I…I…l-love you, too…Naruto…” Kakashi whispers, and if Naruto feels the desperation and maybe even senses some touch-starved tendencies in his embrace, he won’t tell a soul. He just curls a light fist in his vest and holds his teacher closer. Who knows if he’s going to get an opportunity like this again any time soon, if ever?</p><p>Once Kakashi’s composed himself a few minutes later, he doesn’t leave. Instead, he sits right there on the bed at Naruto’s side, and the look in his eyes is even more of an inferno than before. “I’m going to tell you every last thing Lord Third ever wanted kept from you.” Naruto’s eyes widen, heart starting to pound at the weight to those words, but he just swallows and nods. He knows Kakashi will tell him what he means by that without him asking. “At the time, it was mostly to keep you safe and partly because, if you’ll recall, you were something of a loudmouth.”</p><p>Shikamaru smirks and can’t help but tease, elbowing his friend gently, “Yeah, and that’s being <em>generous</em>.”</p><p>Of course, all Naruto can do to that is smirk right back and snicker mischievously. He <em>was</em> the terror of the village with his pranks, all right.</p><p>“Yes, well…” Kakashi concedes, “…you had good reasons for them.” Shikamaru nods, expression softening and darkening at once. No denying that. “I’m making the executive decision to tell you now because you’re older and more mature than you were during Lord Third’s time. You’ll take it better and won’t go popping your mouth off about it like you might have then. About this, anyway. I also know that Lady Tsunade, as much as she cares for you, would <em>want</em> you to know. ”</p><p>Naruto takes all that in for a few seconds and then nods. “O-okay… So…what’s all this about, sensei?”</p><p>Kakashi takes a deep breath, even deeper than the last one, and Naruto swears yellow lightning flashes across his eye. “Naruto…you are the son of the Fourth Hokage, Minato Namikaze.”</p><p>Instantly, the room goes dead silent. A wide-eyed Naruto forgets to breathe—hell, he thinks he may have forgotten <em>how</em>. Shikamaru’s much the same.</p><p>“I’m…I’m <em>what</em>…?” he whispers, barely even that, after a few more seconds, trying to wrap his mind around it. This is…he’s always wondered about his parents, but…but <em>this</em>…?!</p><p>Shikamaru sits as straight as a ramrod, eyes narrowing and hands clutching his knees so tightly, his knuckles go white. “Wait, sensei…are you…you’re being <em>serious</em> right now?”</p><p>Kakashi nods. Naruto doesn’t think he’s ever seen him <em>more</em> serious. “I am. With everything in me. I swear on my Ninja Way, you <em>are</em> Minato’s son.”</p><p>Naruto gulps, sitting back, possibly in even more shock than he was before. He knows Kakashi-sensei would never lie about this, especially if it meant soiling something so precious to him. “W-wait, but—how do you know? Did you know him or something, sensei?”</p><p>Kakashi takes another breath and sighs lightly, crossing his arms and looking up at the ceiling again. He closes his eye while he thinks. It’s been so long since he’s deliberately thought of all this. He feels increasingly nauseous and afraid, silly as that might seem, but…he promised to tell him… “He was…he was my sensei…”</p><p>Naruto gasps, an excited, ecstatic beam springing to his face, Shikamaru mirroring it. He doesn’t want to hurt his sensei – he’s using that voice that says it hurts to talk about this – but he has to admit, this really is incredible! Of all the people in the world who could have turned out to be his father…! Despite his own wants, though, he swallows and does his best to rein himself in, expression gentling. “I know this is hurting you, sensei, so…we can stop. I don’t want to bring up any bad memories for you. I…I appreciate you telling me what you have already.”</p><p>Kakashi blinks, and then softens. This kid, honestly… He shakes his head. “I appreciate that, Naruto, more than you know. But this is something I have to do for you…” he glances upward and smiles softly, never mind that it’s half-pained, “…and for myself, too.”</p><p>He’s so, <em>so</em> tired of lying to this poor boy. Naruto deserves better, and damn it, he’s finally going to do <em>right</em> by him. He’s wanted to for a long time, he just…wasn’t strong enough. This won’t be easy for him, he knows, but he meant what he said. He’s not going to back out now, not when this is just the first step in making things right with Naruto.</p><p>He won’t make excuses. But in his heart, he hopes his sensei and Kushina will understand and forgive him for taking so long.</p><p>Naruto watches him for a few more seconds to make sure he’s really okay, then nods. “All right, if you’re sure.” His smile widens, never condescending, just kind. “If it gets to be too much, though, you can stop whenever you need to. I won’t mind, I promise.”</p><p>Kakashi nods, smile growing. “Right. I’ll keep that in mind.”</p><p>Naruto responds in kind, and then gets back to business. “So my—my Dad really was your sensei, sensei? For real?” His blue eyes shine just thinking about it. Beside him, Shikamaru’s brown eyes are bright and attentive, laser focused.</p><p>Knowing that just hearing about it won’t be enough to satisfy the two boys, Kakashi’s already reaching past his vest into a specially sewn-in secret pocket of his shirt to pull out a small, old photograph he carries with him everywhere he goes. He’s worked hard to keep it in good condition. There’s a bigger copy on his nightstand at home.</p><p>It’s his old team photo, the first and last he ever took with them. It’s his most prized possession alongside his Sharingan and the specialized med kit Rin gave him all those years ago.</p><p>Both boys look like kids on Christmas, but especially Naruto. He looks like he’s about to cry, but keeps it back. He points a shaky finger at the grinning blond man in the middle of the photo, unable to take his eyes off of him. “Is that…is that him?” he whispers, voice slightly thick, almost not daring to hope or believe. “Is that…?”</p><p>“Your father, yes,” Kakashi confirms gently, fondness in every note.</p><p>He can only stare for a long couple moments before wanting to know, “What…what was he like?”</p><p>Kakashi hums in thought, looking up at the ceiling again. It hits Naruto that maybe he’s looking up toward Heaven, toward his parents and the others he’s lost. Maybe it makes him feel closer to them. “He was the best sensei I could have ever asked for. I was five years old when I made genin and was assigned to him, but he never treated me like I was anything but an equal. I appreciated that more than anything. He was the strongest ninja I’ve ever met. He perfected the Second Hokage’s fledgling Flying Thunder God Technique, calling it the Flying Raijin, which lets a user mark weapons or people or anything else he wants and get there in a flash, almost like teleportation. It was incredible. He used it to be as fast as a flash of lightning across the sky. He saved my life with it once. That’s how he earned the nickname ‘Yellow Flash of the Leaf.’”</p><p>He smiles even more. “Of course, while that might have made his enemies quake in their boots and the village adore and respect him, that wasn’t what made his peers and students like me love him so much. Minato was kind and patient and insanely smart, a brilliant tactician. He was so loving, too. Sometimes, I thought that might be the only thing in him, there was so much of it. I wish…” he pauses, realizing he was letting his heart lead the conversation instead of his head; his smile falls tender, “…I wish I’d had more time with him…”</p><p>Naruto is quiet while he processes all this, does his best to burn it into his memory. He just keeps staring at the image of his father in his beloved sensei’s hand, though there’s a different white-haired, red-painted face there, too, in his mind’s eye. “I know the feeling…” he tells him softly, peering up at Kakashi with deep blue eyes that communicate empathy beyond words. There’s a tiny, kind smile on his face. “I wish you did, too, sensei…”</p><p>Kakashi can’t help the warmth in his returning grin. “Thank you, Naruto. I wish you could have met him.”</p><p>Naruto melts a little more and hums in agreement, and then he perks up like he just remembered something important. “Oh! What—what about my mom? Who was she? She must have been an Uzumaki, right?”</p><p>Kakashi nods, and there’s something suddenly soft, more so than with Minato, in his expression. He breathes a laugh. “Yes, she was. Her name was Kushina, and she had hair as red as could be. She was known for it, alongside her temper and strength. The way I heard it, ever since she was a little girl at the Academy, the boys used to make fun of her round face and red hair, calling her ‘tomato,’ so she beat them all up. It wasn’t long before she earned the nickname Red-Hot Habanero.” He laughs, unable to help himself as he remembers some of the stories she and Minato used to tell him growing up. “She was one of the strongest and most skilled shinobi in the village, right alongside your father. She was the best sealer we had, and she taught Minato everything she knew.” He eyes Naruto pointedly, voice lowering some sensitively. “She was <em>also</em> the Nine Tails Jinchuuriki before you.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes go wide and a light gasp leaves him, his mouth dropping open some. At his side, Shikamaru looks between him and Kakashi, eyes narrowing. “So, wait, was it a lineage thing? Is that why Naruto was chosen to be the next vessel? But then why choose the day he was born? Seems a little cruel to inflict something like that on a newborn baby, don’t you think?”</p><p>Kakashi sits back a bit and scratches his head with a heavy sigh. He’s been doing a lot of that today, and he thinks he’ll be doing a lot more of it before this is over. “That…is where it gets complicated…”</p><p>He tells them all about the night Naruto was born – how a masked man stole into the village to extract the Nine Tails from Kushina and release it onto the Leaf, how every option she and Minato had to deal with the Fox <em>except</em> seal it inside Naruto was cut off, how they shielded Naruto with their own bodies when the Nine Tails overheard and attacked, and, after sealing the Fox inside him with the Eight Trigrams Seal, told him that they believed in Naruto and his ability to control the Nine Tails one day, choosing to spend their last moments showering him with all the love they had inside them.</p><p>Shikamaru is speechless. He knew about the Nine Tails’ attack on the village and all, but he never knew it went down like <em>that</em>. Never knew it involved Naruto directly, though thinking about it now, it makes a lot of sense. Glancing over at Naruto, though…he swallows, heart sinking. He wants to reach over to comfort him, but…he’s not sure he should.</p><p>Naruto’s bandaged hand is curled tightly in his hospital gown at his stomach, just over his seal, and while tears are streaming down his face, it’s hard to tell if he’s angry or sad or horrified. Maybe it’s all three. Hell, maybe he’s not sure how to feel. Shikamaru wouldn’t blame him for that. He’s only <em>listening</em>, and he’s not entirely sure himself.</p><p>Shikamaru’s not wrong. Naruto…doesn’t know how to feel at all. Ever since he learned of its existence, he’s always felt resentment for the Nine Tails. It was the reason the village hated him and he didn’t have <em>anyone</em> for so long. And now, given he just learned it <em>killed</em> <em>his</em> <em>parents</em>, too…he wants to hate it. Viciously, all-encompassingly, no holds barred.</p><p>But…he <em>can’t</em>. Its chakra has pulled him out of some truly tough spots, and this time…it used its own chakra to save his <em>life</em>, putting its own on the line in the process. He remembers the flash of protectiveness he felt in that moment, never mind that it was done with dragging paws. It might have only been because they share a body, and if Naruto dies, it does, too, but…then why the protectiveness at all? Why…why feel anything for him but disdain and disgust? Why tell him not to give up, which seems like something one would only say to someone they care about? It just…doesn’t make sense to him…</p><p>But maybe…he can at least start to find out when he talks to the Nine Tails himself.</p><p>They give him a few minutes, and when he finally wipes away his tears and sniffs, he nods at Kakashi. “I-I see…” his voice cracks, but he figured it would. He gives a barely-there, conflicted smile. “Thank you for telling me, sensei.”</p><p>Kakashi nods, wishing this didn’t have to be so painful for him. “Of course… You deserve to know.” Suddenly, a thought hits him that he hopes will cheer him up a little, and the man offers a small, semi-amused grin. “I bet you’ll never guess who the ANBU security detail was while your mom was pregnant.”</p><p>Naruto blinks at the abrupt topic change, but still tries to think of anyone in the ANBU that he knows. “It couldn’t have been Sai ‘cause he wasn’t born yet…and Captain Yamato wasn’t part of the Hokage’s ANBU, so…”</p><p>Kakashi chuckles. “Nope.” His smile grows. “It was <em>me</em>.”</p><p>Naruto gasps, pointing at him. “W-wait, for real? <em>You</em>, Kakashi-sensei?”</p><p>He nods. “Mm hmm! I was Minato’s top student and a captain in the ANBU at the time. Things in the ANBU were getting a little rough for a thirteen-year-old, so he wanted to give me a breather. Besides, being trusted with something as important as watching over the woman who was practically my mother <em>and</em> being able to care for you and make my surrogate father proud at the same time…” He basks in the glow of that memory’s feeling for a moment. “What more could I have asked for?”</p><p>Naruto looks at him like he’s just hung the starting moon outside, practically with stars in his eyes. “<em>Whoa</em>…! So, you’re, like, my guardian angel or something, huh, sensei?”</p><p>Kakashi flushes at the comparison, raising his hands feebly. “W-well, I…don’t know if I’d go <em>that</em> far, but…I appreciate the sentiment.”</p><p>Naruto just grins sunnily before turning back to the picture. “Okay, so I know that’s you.” He points at the obviously younger Kakashi, grumpy and side-eyeing the black-haired boy to his left. He chuckles. “You were a really cute kid, sensei,” he can’t help but tell him.</p><p>Kakashi blushes a little more, an embarrassed laugh escaping him. “T-thank you…”</p><p>Naruto’s finger moves to the girl at the bottom, in the middle of Kakashi and the other boy. “Who’s she? She’s your teammate, right?”</p><p>Kakashi melts, that soft, fond, nostalgic tone coming back to his voice. “Remember that friend with the medical expertise I mentioned? This was her. Her name was Rin Nohara, and she was one of the kindest people I’ve ever met.” He winks. “Alongside you and Obito, that is.”</p><p>Naruto smiles shyly, but brightly, flushing at the high compliment. He’s not sure who Obito is, but he’s guessing he’ll find out. Shikamaru breathes a laugh, unable to keep from melting as he watches Naruto. That’s probably the truest core assessment he’s ever heard. Naruto points at the medical ninja armband Rin’s wearing in the photo, an old style they’ve updated for the new generation. “Hey, wait, so does this mean she was your team’s medical ninja?”</p><p>Kakashi grins with pride. “Yes. Yes, she was. She was only thirteen, but she was the most advanced medical ninja in our class, especially for her age.”</p><p>Naruto gasps excitedly, eyes shining. “Wait, so she was like our Sakura? That’s so <em>cool</em>!”</p><p>Kakashi laughs, this one more genuine. Naruto’s relieved to see his smile matches. “Yes. Less brash and violent—besides defending us on missions, I don’t think Rin had a mean bone in her body—but essentially, yes. To be honest, I rarely got hurt in the field, but—” he breathes a laugh; he’s saying more than he means to, really, but he blames the nostalgia <em>and</em> the fact that he hasn’t talked about his old team openly in…longer than Naruto’s been alive, he thinks, “—she wanted to make sure someone else knew at least some of what she did beyond the basics in case we were ever separated or she got hurt or taken out on a mission.</p><p>“Mostly for…” his finger drifts a few millimeters to land on the goggles-wearing boy with spiky black hair beside Kakashi, “…<em>his</em> sake. His name was Obito Uchiha, and he…” his voice goes softer here and keeps going, probably without him realizing, expression following with some sadness sneaking in, too, “…he was my rival and, admittedly, the closest thing I had to a best friend. The closest thing I’d <em>let</em> myself have, anyway, at the time.”</p><p>Naruto can’t help but notice that Kakashi seems so…conflicted about this Obito guy, so sorry and grateful at once. Could it be something like him and Sasuke? Or…is it more than that? He doesn’t miss the way he keeps saying ‘was’ about both him <em>and</em> Rin, so…</p><p>“Like I mentioned before, he was another of those kindest people I’ve ever met, so loudly friendly and adoring and not caring who knew it. He was perpetually late to everything because he was always helping out the elderly in the village. They adored him. Looking back, it was cute, honestly.” He laughs, remembering it. “Like you, he was loud and proud and dreamed of being Hokage someday. And on top of that, he was so in love with Rin, ever since they were small, it was almost sad. Sweet, but sad because…” he blushes and chuckles, a bit embarrassed to admit this part, even all these years later, “…w-well, he…knew how she felt about me…”</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru’s eyes go wide at that, and they look at each other with matching enthused grins. “<em>Whoa</em>! No way! Kakashi, <em>you</em> had a girlfriend?! She was so pretty and smart, just like Sakura! You’re so lucky!” Naruto praises.</p><p>Shikamaru chuckles and smirks. “I gotta admit, sensei, I never really pictured you with anyone besides your dirty books, but someone like her? She doesn’t seem like she’d be too needy or naggy, so,” he shrugs, “I can see it.” He winks. “Good job.”</p><p>Kakashi waves his hand, turning almost red. “Whoa, whoa, boys! I appreciate the support, but that’s actually…<em>not</em> what happened.” They both blink, raising twin eyebrows. “I didn’t…share her feelings. Not because there was anything wrong with <em>her</em>, of course not. On the contrary, I would have been damn lucky to have someone like her by my side. I just…well, it was complicated on my part. She understood my reasons, though, and did her best to care for me regardless. As for Obito…” he softens again, “…all he wanted was her happiness, so even if it ended with him hurt, he did his best to be there for her and even encouraged her feelings for me.” He breathes a barely-there laugh, appreciating and heartbroken at once. “It was…admirable. Yeah… That’s what it was.” His gaze slides to Naruto. “It actually reminds me a lot of you with Sakura and Sasuke.”</p><p>Naruto blushes brightly, and Shikamaru snickers, unable to help himself. Once he shakes that off, he looks back to his sensei, expression serious. “So…what happened to him?” he asks quietly, gently, not wanting to open anything if he doesn’t have to. He’s trying to give him an out, honestly, not that he thinks his teacher will take it.</p><p>Kakashi’s eye falls, and he goes silent. The room around him, too, the very air, is suddenly devoid of sound, Naruto swears. He also thinks it’s gotten at least a few degrees colder. It lasts for a good minute or two until Kakashi, staring at his team photo, at Obito in particular, says, voice barely above a whisper, “I’m not an Uchiha.”</p><p>Naruto cocks his head, a small “Huh?” leaving him. “Well, yeah… Of course you’re not…”</p><p>Shikamaru, on the other hand, clues in almost immediately. “And yet you have a Sharingan.”</p><p>Kakashi’s eye flicks back up, voice a little stronger this time. “And do you know how that’s possible?”</p><p>Shikamaru thinks, Naruto looking to him because he’s still confused, but also honestly intrigued. “The only way a person can have a Sharingan if they’re not born with Uchiha blood is…” his sharp eyes snap up to meet Kakashi’s, “…transplantation.”</p><p>A nod. “Exactly.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and he turns back to Kakashi. “W-wait, so…your Sharingan… You’re saying it’s…it was someone <em>else’s</em>?”</p><p>He feels like an idiot, like he should have already known that, and maybe he already did on some level. But figuring something for years and finding out it’s true are two completely different things.</p><p>A long inhale through his nose, and Kakashi holds it while he moves his crossed leg the tiniest bit so it’s touching Naruto’s. Even that small source of warmth helps ground him. He exhales slowly through his mouth. It’s a calming exercise Rin taught him years ago, and it always helps. He’s still so grateful. “Yes, Naruto. It was…” he glances down at the photograph, voice lowering again, “…it was Obito’s…”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, drifting to the picture again. For Kakashi to be the only one of his Dad’s students left to protect his Mom…he must have been young, really young, when all this happened, right…? He feels his heart and stomach sink, and he can’t help swallowing before asking, “Are you…sure you want to tell us? You don’t have to, really. I don’t...” He shakes his head and starts over, a sweet smile coming as he reaches out to cradle Kakashi’s photo hand with his. “The last thing I’d ever want to do is to hurt you, sensei…”</p><p>Kakashi’s gaze finds Naruto’s, and a helpless, easy smile rides his tiny sigh. He still has no idea how far he’d really go for him, does he? Compared to that…this is nothing. Bringing up his other hand, he sandwiches Naruto’s between his and squeezes. “I know, Naruto,” he tells him softly, so much more grateful than he will probably ever understand. “Believe me, I know. But this will be good for you two as well as me, I promise. I haven’t…I can’t…remember the last time I talked about Obito and Rin when I wasn’t visiting their graves…and they deserve more. Better.” He smiles. “Maybe…you can help with that.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, understanding the weight he’s putting on this. “O-of course, sensei…”</p><p>At his side, Shikamaru nods, rare conviction he’s only found recently lighting his eyes. “We’re all ears, sensei.”</p><p>Sitting back a bit, Kakashi lays his photo on the bed and crosses his arms, tilting his head back to look at the ceiling again as he thinks. “In order for all this to make sense…I suppose I’ll have to start at the beginning.” He takes a deep breath. This…is going to be difficult. “About six months ago, Naruto, you learned that the White Fang of the Leaf was my father. His real name was Sakumo Hatake, and he was one of the strongest ninja in the Leaf.”</p><p>He goes on to tell them about his father’s top secret mission behind enemy lines that he abandoned in order to save his captured teammates during the Third Great Ninja War, how the village and those same comrades vilified and ostracized him for it, and how the emotional and physical toll it had on him were so great that, eventually, he took his own life…and Kakashi, still just a little boy, was the one who found him.</p><p>Naruto sheds a good few tears, but he’s also curling a tight fist in his sheets and gritting his teeth. He wants to argue for Kakashi’s father’s sake, but—they undoubtedly already know how he feels, and especially in Kakashi’s case, he knows better than anyone how awful and unfair and <em>wrong</em> that was. Besides…he knows it would be easier for Kakashi if he’s able to get it all out at once. Swallowing, he nods for Kakashi to continue.</p><p>“After that…I stuck to the ninja rules like it was life or death. Because, to me…it<em> was</em>. Even when I was on a team with Minato-sensei, Rin, and Obito, I didn’t lighten up at all. Obito and I fought over it constantly.” He chuckles. “We were always at each other’s throats. Minato-sensei tried to help me, but…nothing could sway me. I was <em>sure</em> that was the only way to survive in this ninja world.” He takes a deep breath. “And then…<em>that</em> day came…the day that changed my whole outlook on life and,” he reaches up to rest delicate fingers over his Sharingan eye, other eye deep in his memories already, “gave me this eye.”</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru both swallow thickly, mouths dry and hearts already starting to pound. Kakashi, for his part…without these two here to ground him, no matter how many years it’s been…he’s not sure he’d be able to get through this. He thanks everything for them.</p><p>“It was a mission that, if successful, would eventually lead the Hidden Leaf to victory in the war. While Minato-sensei was securing a place for our men elsewhere, the three of us were to take out Kannabi Bridge, the epicenter of the enemy’s most important supply route, which was guarded by a group of Stone ninja.”</p><p>He tells them every last detail about that mission. How Rin was captured and Obito wanted to go after her, but Kakashi refused because it would be breaking the rules; how Obito told him he believed Kakashi’s father was a great hero and he’d go after Rin just like he did his teammates no matter what; and how he repaired and revived Kakashi’s long-broken, dead heart with what would eventually become his Ninja Way.</p><p>“As much as I tried to deny it out of fear of losing them like I lost my father, I <em>did</em> care for Rin and Obito, so much more than I was ever brave enough to let on. I was a coward, the <em>worst</em> kind…”</p><p>He tells them how he went after Obito to save Rin and lost his eye saving him, and then how Obito awakened his Sharingan returning the favor. “It was the first time he’d ever actually taken a life, but he was the kind of person who would do anything to protect his friends,” he smiles gently, proudly, at his charge, “not unlike you, Naruto.”</p><p>He goes on about how they managed to save Rin, but…that’s when things went horribly wrong. How one of the Stone ninja brought the whole cave down on top of them, how Kakashi was knocked out for just a few seconds when a rock hit his bad eye, but…it was enough. His voice shakes here, and he curls shaking hands into white-knuckled fists. He feels almost sick retelling this part, but he presses on. He tells them how Obito ended up saving him, but couldn’t save himself from the boulder the size of a building, how it crushed his entire right side, how…how he was <em>dying</em> right in front of them, but all he had to ask was if <em>they</em> were okay…</p><p>Naruto’s never seen his sensei cry before. Honestly, he never thought he would. Maybe that was stupid and naïve of him. To be fair, Kakashi isn’t crying much yet, just a few tears here and there, but…still. Not that Naruto would ever judge him for that. Of course not, especially when he doesn’t have any room to talk himself. He’s crying much more than his sensei, harder than he even normally might be by now if it weren’t for seeing his teacher cry.</p><p>Kakashi, for his part, is just staring at his palm where his tears have landed in shock. He’s…crying…? He hasn’t cried in… The last time he cried was…when Obito…and Rin…and then when Minato-sensei and Kushina…but not…not <em>since</em>…! He…actually forgot how it felt to cry, how gross and vulnerable and raw it makes him feel. No wonder he repressed these memories and the emotions tied to them so much. But still…now that he’s started, he doesn’t think he can hope to stop. Thankfully, he knows Naruto and Shikamaru would be the <em>last</em> to judge him for something like this.</p><p>Tears or no, he forges ahead to tell them about how Obito said he wanted to give him his gift for making jounin and squad captain before he died, that he hadn’t before not out of spite or malice like Kakashi thought, but because he couldn’t think of anything good enough for the boy he secretly admired. Kakashi told them how Obito had praised and believed in him fully, how, at Obito’s behest, once the transplant was done Kakashi used his gift to defeat the enemy outside so he and Rin could escape, and then…how he and Rin had <em>stayed</em> by Obito’s side until the last possible moment.</p><p>Kakashi’s broken a good bit more by this point, shoulders trembling, head hanging, many more tears falling than before. Naruto’s tears are absolutely flooding his face while his shoulders quake horribly, but he’s biting his shaking, white-knuckled fist so his sobs don’t interrupt. Shikamaru has a hand on his back, rubbing it in a way he hopes will soothe him, at least a little.</p><p>Once they both calm down a little several minutes later, Kakashi keeps going with the last stretch. It’s Rin’s turn this time, and…Naruto can’t help the way his stomach sinks even lower. He can tell dredging up all this is taking a toll on his sensei. He’s just…not sure what kind. He seems like he’s tearing himself asunder, and yet…he also seems…better for it, too? The way he holds his head and shoulders just a tiny bit higher than usual, the light in his dark eye slowly getting brighter than he thinks he’s ever seen it.</p><p>Shikamaru gulps. He’s seeing an incredibly vulnerable side of Kakashi here that he never thought he’d see. He almost feels like he shouldn’t be here, like he’s invading a ridiculously private moment, but…if he didn’t want him here, Kakashi would say so, and he thinks he wants him here for Naruto, too. Hell, maybe it’s to help ground them <em>both</em>, seeing as he’s the only one able to keep his head between the three of them. Not that he’s saying there’s anything wrong with crying like they are, of course. Being a ninja and keeping an open heart…like Kakashi said, it’s a difficult thing, but man, is it admirable. If anything, this is just another example of why Naruto’s methods, while unorthodox, can touch and change other shinobis’ hearts so easily. Still…he wishes he could do more.</p><p>Kakashi tells them about how, months following Obito’s death, they were nearly done with a top secret mission when Rin was captured by Hidden Mist ninja, who sealed the Three Tails inside of her and planned to unleash it on the Leaf the second she stepped foot inside the village. How Rin begged him to kill her to protect the village, but Kakashi vehemently refused because that would be breaking his promise to take care of her to Obito and vowed to find another way, how they were ambushed by more Mist ninja, and then…how Rin chose to die…</p><p>A sharp jolt, and a lurching, pained sob suddenly leaps from Naruto’s throat, loud and strangled and ugly. It makes them all jump, Naruto, too, not even realizing it was coming, but he just lets his raining tears fall and clutches the right side of his chest opposite his heart, gritting his teeth against more harsh sobs. At first, they’re worried, thinking something might be wrong, but then they look closer and realize...</p><p>That side of his chest…that reaction to what Kakashi’s Lightning Blade must have felt like…the <em>pain</em> in his expression… Shikamaru’s face goes <em>dark</em>, his hand on Naruto’s shoulder tightening as he bites back a curse, while Kakashi squeezes teary eyes shut for a moment, a strangled sound escaping him as well.</p><p>Sasuke’s Chidori…a copy of Kakashi’s Lightning Blade, at the time corrupted by Orochimaru’s Cursed Seal of Heaven…left a similar hole in Naruto’s own chest just a few years ago…</p><p>His reaction just drives it all home to Kakashi, who was already on the precipice of breaking entirely, and as his own tears threaten to become a river, Naruto looks up at him with a deep, gasping breath, the end a choking sob. Lifting his good arm, he waves him forward, almost begging, but he’d never force him. They both know that. And yet...</p><p>The next thing Kakashi knows, he’s reaching forward to let himself be pulled into Naruto’s strong, warm, safe hold. He feels like a child again, like <em>he</em> should be the one offering comfort to his precious student…but he also can’t imagine any other way this could go or anywhere else in the world he’d rather be.</p><p>“Y-you did <em>well</em>, sensei…” Naruto whispers, voice thick and cracking and splintered, but he doesn’t care. He curls warm, gentle fingers in silver hair. “Y-you’ve <em>done enough</em>…<em>s-so</em> much more… You—you can<em> rest</em> now…”</p><p>That’s all it takes. Kakashi shatters, utterly and completely and entirely unceremoniously.</p><p>Through it all, Naruto <em>stays</em>.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0006"><h2>6. Flower Language</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Sakura and Kakashi's loose ends are finally tied up. (Part 4/Kakashi-Sakura arc conclusion)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>I meant to have this up <i>way</i> sooner, but this was (obviously) another long one (8.9k exactly this time! LMAO!), work has been kicking my ass, and I also have an almost hilariously (cruelly?) coincidental quick anecdote! While working on this chapter, I had a (I thought) good friend of almost 7 years cut me off out of pretty much nowhere, so...yeah, that sucked. I was pretty pissed and devastated, to say the least, and thus, I needed to take a few days to myself to sort out how I felt. In the end, though I do hope we can be friends again in the future, I do think it's for the best, and I've mostly made peace with it. On the <i>bright</i> side of things, I now know even more intimately how Naruto feels in this fic, haha ('cause from the start, I was always the one trying to save my friend from her own darkness), so that just gives me an even <i>better</i> perspective on how he's feeling for this fic! So hopefully that will help me channel even more realistic feelings into my writing! :D Still, apologies for the delay!</p><p><i>One particularly emotional section of this fic (you'll know it when you see it) was inspired by a review left on FFN:</i> “Naruto really is the only one that can understand how Rin felt, not just the death by raikiri, but the desperation that drove her to protect the village from the beast she now harbored. If his seal broke, Naruto probably figures he might very well opt for that, as well.” (CREDIT: TigrezzTail)</p><p>Hope you enjoy this chapter! ;D</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s over an hour later, nearly two, before Kakashi finally stops crying. Naruto only stopped just before he did.</p><p>Kakashi feels…lighter, like he can breathe easier, than he has in <em>years</em>, he’s sure. So many. Maybe since…since he lost them. His heart no longer sends excruciating pain through him every time it beats, reminding him that theirs no longer can. He feels…<em>free</em>. Not entirely, of course—he expects the survivor’s guilt to always be there, at least in some way or form—but…it’s still so much better than he’s felt in…forever. He thinks the last time he felt this unburdened was…back when he was a child with his father alive and well.</p><p>It only dawns on him then that he’s still holding Naruto and vice versa. Both of them are much more relaxed now, but their holds on each other are still strong, tight and gentle at once, reluctant to let go and just wanting to <em>be</em> there. It’s nice, honestly. Really nice. They know they can’t stay like that forever, though, no matter how much they might want to, so they finally pull away after a few more seconds, though Naruto, as usual, doesn’t hide his feelings at all on why he does so so slowly. “Your hugs are really nice, sensei…”</p><p>Kakashi blinks, heart stuttering while light pink dusts his cheeks. He’s…never been told that before. Then again, the last time he hugged anyone was Kushina and Minato-sensei, and technically, they initiated it. A shy smile comes. “T-thank you, Naruto. And yours…” He softens in remembrance, voice following. He can’t help it. “Yours remind me of your parents’, protective and strong, yet warm and comforting at the same time. Of course, that’s not to say they’re not your own, too.” His smile grows, and the adoration and respect in his voice are practically palpable.<strong> “</strong>That’s where your love comes in. You have even more love in you than your father. I’d even go as far as to say you overflow with it.” He chuckles. “Not that I’m surprised. You…” He melts, more than he thinks he has in front of anyone in forever, and it surprises him more than a little. He attributes it to how much better he feels. “You are the most loving person I’ve ever met in my life, Naruto. Temari was right when she said you have the power to change people with your open heart and love alone.” Hell, look at how Naruto’s gotten <em>him</em> to open up. No one else has ever been able to do that. Well, no one still alive, anyway. His voice lowers further still, soft and warm and reverent as hell, expression with it. “It’s amazing… It really is.”</p><p>Touched tears crowd the corners of a stunned Naruto’s eyes. Shikamaru pressing a tissue into his hand snaps him out of it enough to wipe them away, and then he smiles widely, if shyly, at his sensei, rubbing the back of his head. “I-I don’t know about all that, Kakashi-sensei. I think I just…get lucky, that’s all. But thank you so much.” His grin grows, and he blushes pink. “I’m really happy you think that!”</p><p>Shikamaru, watching him with his chin nestled between his knuckles, can’t help but scoff lightly, so fond, he’s actually surprised he held it back this long. “He’s right, ya know,” he chimes in. Naruto looks at him, blinking wide blue eyes while his blush deepens. Shikamaru takes the opportunity to keep going before his friend can deny it again. “You know what it’s like to be without love, without friends or anyone to care for you,” just saying that makes his throat constrict in fury and guilt, “and you don’t want anyone else to ever feel like you did. That’s why you make friends with almost everyone you meet as easily as breathing. It just comes naturally to you to touch people, to change them for the better, even our enemies.” Hell, look at how he’s changed Shikamaru himself over the years. He smiles at Naruto, startlingly fond and admiring as anything. Naruto doesn’t miss it, swallows as his heart pounds in his chest. Shikamaru reaches forward to rap his knuckles there, at his heart, brown eyes never leaving Naruto’s. “You’re one of a kind, Naruto Uzumaki. Don’t forget it.”</p><p>Naruto is struck speechless, particularly at those last words, echoes of what he used to say to the villagers as a kid so they wouldn’t forget he existed. Now Shikamaru’s using it on <em>him</em>… He doesn’t miss the significance, doesn’t know how he could. When he finally finds his voice again, thick with emotion, he softens with that same shy smile still playing. “I-I still think you’re giving me <em>way</em> too much credit here,” Shikamaru huffs a laugh and cocks an eyebrow in that way of his that Naruto <em>knows</em> means he can stuff it, “but…” he bumps their fists together, smile growing, “…I’m really happy to hear that, too. <em>Thank you</em>, Shikamaru.” He gives Kakashi a fist bump, too, making him chuckle. “You guys…!” He looks between them, beam and happy flush coming back in full force. “You really are the best!”</p><p><em>Only because you are to us first</em>, they think as one.</p><p>On that note, Kakashi takes a breath. “If you’re ready to hear it, now that you know about my old team, I have some final parts to my explanation.” Naruto’s confused, trading a glance with Shikamaru, but he nods and pays rapt attention regardless. “After I lost everything, I felt like I was wandering in darkness for years. If it weren’t for Gai, Asuma, Kurenai, and eventually, you kids, who knows what would have happened to me?” He breathes a wry laugh. “I held on to those bonds like a man drowning, but when I saw Sasuke wanted no part of any new bonds here, he reminded me so much of myself back then that I wanted to be there for him, to try to steer him back toward you and Sakura and the rest…” He sighs a bit, shoulders slumping. “But we all know how that turned out...” He does his best not to blame himself like Naruto asked, but he suspects he’ll always feel at least partially responsible.</p><p>Taking another breath and clearing his throat, he keeps going. “On the other side of that, <em>you</em> were so much like Minato-sensei and Obito in so many ways, and the reminders…” he looks away guiltily, “…were too much for me a lot of the time. It’s…it’s why I…wasn’t around while you were growing up, too, never mind that my mental state at the time was…fragile, at best.” These explanations don’t stop him from clenching a fist, angry at himself. “I turned away from you in an effort to escape my own feelings… I was a coward…” he bows his head low, “…and I’m so sorry.”</p><p>There’s a long moment of silence, and then, “You’re not a coward, sensei.” Kakashi’s ears perk at that, at Naruto’s soft, sort of confused, yet matter-of-fact tone, and he looks up. “Anyone would feel uneasy and scared around someone who reminds them of people they’ve lost. That makes total sense!” He rubs the back of his head sheepishly and laughs. “It’s why Sakura and I weren’t the nicest to Sai when he first showed up, remember? ‘Cause he reminded us too much of Sasuke, and we weren’t ready for him to be replaced yet.”</p><p>He shrugs. “To be honest, I don’t really see how you <em>could</em> have been there for me growing up. You were probably terrified of being reminded of my Dad and Obito, and the idea of getting attached to me and possibly losing me like everyone else you ever loved?” He’s doing his best to be sensitive about this, he really is, but he can’t help the point he’s making. He huffs a small, incredulous laugh. “Forget it. There was no way.” He locks firm, empathetic eyes on his beloved teacher. “If you ask me, there was nothing cowardly about any of it, Kakashi-sensei. It’s natural, just being human. No one can fault you for that.” He grins, toothy and bright. “Besides, you’re here now, right? So you’re already making up for it!” He chuckles. “Not that there’s actually anything <em>to</em> make up, in my book.”</p><p>Kakashi can’t help but stare at Naruto for a few moments, the little tension left in his shoulders easing as a helpless, hopeful smile lights his face. He hopes Kushina and Minato-sensei are watching. Their son… He really is something else. Something incredible. “<em>Thank you</em>, Naruto.”</p><p>Naruto just nods. “Of course!” Then, remembering something that’s been bothering him, he perks up a bit. “Oh, and by the way?” He crosses his arms as best he can, his good arm over his chest, at least, cocking his head. “After going through all that, Old Man Third was a <em>jerk</em> for putting a team like ours on your shoulders.” Shikamaru and Kakashi blink wide eyes, the former unable to help sputtering a laugh at his bluntness. Naruto flashes him a tiny smile before going on. “I mean, come on! He knew I was your sensei’s kid and my mom was like your mom, he knew I was a lot like Obito, and he must have known that Sakura had medical ninja potential. Plus, he knew Sasuke was an Uchiha, so he’d also remind you of Obito, <em>and</em> he had to have known how you’d feel about Sasuke’s trauma and the darkness surrounding him. There’s no way he <em>didn’t</em> know all that. And even if he didn’t put together <em>all</em> those things, he knew enough to realize how unfair it would be to you. Hell, he’s lucky it didn’t traumatize you even <em>more</em>.”</p><p>He curls his good fist in his hospital gown till his knuckles crack, grinding his teeth. If Lord Third were still around right now, he’d give him a piece of his damn mind. “He could have given our team to <em>anyone</em>, but he gave it to you. I mean, <em>I’m</em> grateful, and I know Sakura is, too, because like I said, you’re the only sensei I’d ever <em>want</em>, but still…” His eyes burn low with righteous fire. “Honestly, Kakashi-sensei, given the circumstances? I think you did the absolute best you could with what you were given. And I think the rest of us turned out great! Sai, too!” He softens. “You’re really amazing, sensei. I know it was hard for you, and I wish it wasn’t, but…” he bows as low as he can, “…thank you so much. For <em>everything</em>.”</p><p>Kakashi is surprised to have to swallow a lump in his throat and feel tears burn the back of his eyes. He wonders if he’s a little more emotional than usual because of the circumstances or because of the closure he’s received. Maybe it’s a combination of both. Either way, he reaches out to touch Naruto’s shoulder so he looks up and straightens some, then leans forward slowly to rest his forehead on Naruto’s.</p><p>The boy’s eyes widen and he forgets to breathe for a moment, the cool metal of his teacher’s headband making this all the more poignant for him, but then he just smiles and relaxes, following Kakashi in closing his eyes. They stay like that for a moment or two before Kakashi finally whispers, “You’re pretty amazing yourself, Naruto. Thank you, too…so much.”</p>
<hr/><p>Naruto’s dinner comes a short time later, and even though he doesn’t really feel like eating, mostly because he knows after that he’ll have to take Granny Tsunade’s sleeping medicine and he still wants to wait for Sakura, he remembers Shikamaru’s advice from yesterday and does what he can. After a few minutes, he goes quiet and eats a little slower as something else that’s been bothering him, something he’s not sure he should talk about, weighs on his mind. His friends notice the change in him, of course, but they don’t say anything. He’ll talk when he’s ready.</p><p>About ten minutes later, barely halfway through his meal, Naruto can’t take the uneasy anticipation churning his stomach anymore. He doesn’t want to bring this up, hates that he even has to <em>think</em> about it, but he also feels like he’s going to jump out of his skin if he doesn’t. Slowly setting down his chopsticks and wiping his mouth, he gathers his resolve. He’s…not really sure how to approach this, but…he feels like he <em>has</em> to. For <em>them</em>.</p><p>“What happened with Rin…and my mom…” he starts at last, coming to rest a hand over his stomach, the Seal drawn there. The thought of something happening to his village, his friends, because of him…it’s always been one of his biggest fears, the stuff of most of his nightmares, and having even more proof that that fear isn’t unfounded…it <em>terrifies</em> him. “It could—happen to me someday, too. It…i-if I weren’t here in the village, and even then, it…it might have already.” His hand shakes, clenches a bit in his hospital gown. “Itachi and that—other Akatsuki guy already came to the village looking for me once, after all.”</p><p>Neither Kakashi nor Shikamaru knows where this is going, but they’re listening like their lives depend on it. They know this isn’t the sort of thing Naruto would bring up if it weren’t of utmost importance.</p><p>“Shikamaru told me the Nine Tails helped save me after what Sasuke did to me. I—I remember, when it happened, it told me not to give up.” A sardonic laugh leaves him. “Can you believe it? Specifically, it said, ‘Don’t give up, <em>brat</em>!’, but still… It…it still <em>saved</em> me. I know it might have only done it because it had to, because I’m its host, but…I don’t know how to explain it. I…I <em>felt</em> something more there, almost like it…it <em>cared</em>, even just a tiny bit, about what happened to <em>me</em>, I swear…” His gaze drifts to his bandaged hand. “Knowing it killed my parents and remembering how I was treated growing up because of it don’t exactly paint it in the best light, but…” his face scrunches, “…I’m…<em>confused</em> about how to feel about the Nine Tails…”</p><p>Kakashi nods, wishing he was at less of a loss here. “With all that, I think anyone would be.”</p><p>Shikamaru scratches the back of his head. “That’s an understatement.” He eyes his friend pointedly. “So, what are you thinking, Naruto?”</p><p>Naruto purses his lips, then bites the lower one. “I’m…I wanna try talking to the Nine Tails. I’ve done it before, a few times.” A chill goes down his spine at the memories, which makes Shikamaru’s hairs stand on end. He isn’t sure he likes this idea. “I…I want to thank it for helping me, but…mostly, it’s because there are some things <em>about</em> it saving me that don’t make sense. I’m hoping…maybe…we can work something out. It could…take a while, maybe a long time. Months or years. Hell, it might not work at all. But if it does, maybe we could even become…allies or something. Close to it, anyway. I don’t know…”</p><p>The two at his side blink. He wants…to make <em>friends</em> with—with the <em>Nine-Tailed Fox</em>…? They’re not…quite sure what to say to that… After a few more shocked seconds, Shikamaru recovers first. “Okay… I admit, I have questions and concerns, but they can wait.” His eyes narrow. “You haven’t told us <em>why</em> yet.”</p><p>Blue eyes fall at his scrutinizing gaze. “I…well…” He curls his hospital gown tighter in his fist, skin crawling and stomach sloshing again at the idea of telling them. He knew he’d have to, it just…still feels so sudden… He doesn’t feel ready. His voice follows his eyes. “You won’t…like it…”</p><p>The two geniuses trade a look instantly. “Tell us anyway,” they say in unison, doing their best to mentally prepare themselves for, well, what could be just about anything.</p><p>Of course, nothing could have prepared them for what he actually <em>says</em>.</p><p>Naruto takes a deep breath, then looks up at them both, eyes fierce and bright and bold. They don’t think they’ve <em>ever</em> seen him this serious. “I’ve lost control of the Nine Tails a few times already. Not <em>completely</em>, but close enough that I lost my sense of self and things got <em>bad</em>. You and Pervy Sage managed to intervene those times, sensei. I know he’s the one who warned you about it and gave you the sealing tag that helped stop me on our mission to rescue Gaara.” Kakashi nods. Shikamaru doesn’t know what they’re talking about, but he can ask Kakashi to fill him in later.</p><p>Naruto has to visibly steel himself before he says this next part, taking another deep, shaky breath. The room seems to drop several degrees at once while his eyes are set ablaze. “If it happens again and I lose control completely…if there really is <em>no</em> way for you to get me back…” his lips tremble, but he forces his way through, “…I <em>need</em> you to <em>take me out</em>.”</p><p>“<em>Absolutely not</em>.”</p><p>Shikamaru’s response is an immediate snarl, teeth bared, brown eyes alight with white-hot fire. Naruto blinks. He doesn’t think he’s ever seen him so pissed off and defiant. Not since Asuma’s death, anyway. He doesn’t know, maybe this outclasses that, considering Naruto’s still alive and Shikamaru’s fighting to keep him that way.</p><p>“Shikamaru’s right, Naruto,” Kakashi says, much more calmly, glancing at Shikamaru, but there’s some steel backing his words, too. He <em>refuses</em> to lose another loved one to a Tailed Beast. “We’ll find another way. It doesn’t mean you have to die.”</p><p>“You can’t honestly think we’d just let you go that easily! Do you really think so little of us, of <em>yourself</em>, that you’d rather die than let us <em>try</em>?” Shikamaru presses, grinding his teeth at the very thought, mostly in an effort to keep back the bile threatening at the base of his throat. He can’t even think beyond the fact that Naruto is a complete <em>idiot </em>to ask this of them or he really might be sick. He can’t. There’s no way in hell.</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and he reels back as if struck, hurt blooming in his chest as he blinks in confusion. “<em>W-what</em>? N-no! <em>No</em>, I—I just—if you <em>can’t</em> get me back, if there <em>is</em> no other way, you might not have a <em>choice</em>! I’m—I’m trying to <em>prepare</em> you for that!”</p><p>Shikamaru opens his mouth to fire back, hackles effectively raised at the very notion of losing Naruto for good, especially to something that’s <em>not his fault</em>, has <em>never</em> been his choice, of having to do so by his<em> own hands</em>—but Kakashi holds up a hand, black eye stern. Grudgingly, the younger man swallows his words and defers to his superior, though he defiantly takes tight hold of Naruto’s hand, threading their fingers together and squeezing.</p><p>“I understand where you’re coming from, Naruto. More than anyone else ever could, I do,” Kakashi reassures. He doesn’t want him to think he’s alone in this. After all, Rin asked the same thing of him when he was much younger. The last thing he wants is for this to become a repeat of that. “But I <em>need</em> you to tell us exactly what you’re thinking. Maybe there’s something you haven’t thought of yet.”</p><p>Naruto raises a skeptical eyebrow, but Shikamaru squeezes his hand again, silently begging, and he sighs. “Back when…Pervy Sage and I were training, at one point, he wanted to try to help me control the Nine Tails’ chakra. It…” his eyes fall to his bandages, face crumples, and he holds Shikamaru’s hand a little tighter for purchase, “…it went bad, and…I leveled an entire building, the yard around it, a huge part of the forest. I…I <em>hurt</em> him…” He swallows. “When I woke up, we were both really badly hurt and recovering in the hospital…”</p><p>He knows he probably shouldn’t, knows Pervy Sage held no fear or ill will toward him at all afterward, but he still feels really guilty for that. He glares at his sheets before peering up at his friends again.</p><p>“I don’t want to hurt anyone <em>ever</em> again. I <em>never</em> want to kill anyone. If I ever did, even while like that, even if it wasn’t technically my fault…” He squeezes his eyes shut for a moment and shakes his head vehemently. “Hurting Pervy Sage <em>once</em> was bad enough. If he wasn’t him, I probably <em>would</em> have killed him. <em>That’s</em> how bad it was.” He <em>needs</em> them to understand. This isn’t just something he’s come up with out of the blue. “If it ever happened again, if my Seal broke completely, and there was no one around to stop me like he did, if you or Captain Yamato weren’t here, Kakashi-sensei…” he feels sick at the truth to his words, remembering how much it hurt Pervy Sage just to <em>laugh</em> after that time, “…I-I couldn’t take it.”</p><p>He fixes hard, absolutely unyielding eyes on them. It’s <em>scary</em> and hurts like hell to talk about this, but it’s <em>necessary</em>, damn it. He <em>needs</em> to know he’s not going to be a danger to the people he loves. He couldn’t live with himself. “You <em>know</em> me. You <em>know</em> that’s the truth. This isn’t something that’s just come up suddenly either. I’ve—I’ve been thinking about it for <em>years</em>.” Kakashi and Shikamaru’s hearts pang something fierce, devastation clawing at their insides. The younger man barely bites back a curse. Naruto’s eyes smolder, even while his words start to tremble and break. “<em>Please</em>… I’m <em>not</em> kidding around here. I’m—I’m <em>begging</em> you…”</p><p>Shikamaru unconsciously squeezes Naruto’s hand tighter, as tightly as he can, not even realizing it might be painful until his friend squeezes back. When he does, he immediately loosens his grip and locks eyes with Naruto, silently apologizing and just trying to communicate how…<em>wrong</em> this feels. He’s the guy who always goes over all the angles, every possibility, but right now, that can all go to hell. Why are they even discussing this? Like <em>hell</em> they’ll ever let that happen. Shikamaru will <em>die</em> first, and he already knows Kakashi feels the exact same way. The others, too, any of them.</p><p>Naruto’s way out… It’s <em>not</em> an option.</p><p>Not one he’ll accept, anyway.</p><p>Shikamaru looks to Kakashi next, taking a deep, if shaky, breath. He knows he’s usually not as emotional a thinker as all this, and yeah, okay, <em>realistically</em>, he <em>knows</em> why they’re having this conversation. Naruto’s not an idiot, after all. The only way he’d ever propose something like this is if he were dead serious, if he really <em>had</em> been thinking about it for years, maybe since Master Jiraiya was hurt.</p><p>To be honest, he’s not really sure <em>what</em> has him so worked up about this. Yes, Naruto’s his friend, he loves him, he would fight and die any second of any day from now till the end of time to protect him, and he’s had an idea forming in his head about <em>staying</em> by his side for a good half-year now, maybe longer…but still… Maybe it’s the thought of losing someone so close to him again. He doesn’t know if he can take another Asuma. That’s why he’s…he <em>needs</em> Kakashi-sensei to temper his upset and ground him right now. His hold on Naruto’s hand tightens again, consciously gentler this time.</p><p>Kakashi, for his part, is quiet. He’s disturbed by this information, too, deeply so. Not the part about the incident where Master Jiraiya was hurt, that he already knew, but…the fact that Naruto’s been grappling with the reality that his last day could come at any moment, that he’s had something like this weighing on him for <em>years</em>… He wonders if Master Jiraiya knew. Given how close and alike he and Naruto were, he’s guessing so. He wonders if he ever talked to Naruto about it. Hell, maybe…maybe that was one of the things he’d wanted to discuss with Lady Tsunade after he was meant to return from his mission to the Hidden Rain village. It’s a morbid thought, but…it makes sense. Plus, given how similar Naruto and Rin are, how much they love their village and their friends, it also makes sense that Naruto would be <em>willing</em> to make the same sacrifice Rin did, even if he didn’t necessarily <em>want</em> to. Because he <em>knows</em> Naruto doesn’t want to die. He has far too much he wants – <em>needs</em> – to live for…</p><p>But like Shikamaru said…that almost makes it <em>worse</em>…</p><p>And yet, despite any reservations or misgivings he and Shikamaru may have…this isn’t about them. At the end of the day, this is about <em>Naruto</em>. <em>He</em> comes first.</p><p>That’s why he finally takes a breath and says, “Let me talk to Captain Yamato and Lady Tsunade about this first. Then, we can think up a game plan. Between the three of us—and Shikamaru, too, if you’re up for it—” the boy immediately nods, zero hesitation, “—I’m sure we can come up with something that will make you feel safe <em>without</em> giving us early heart attacks.” He reaches out to ruffle his student’s hair gently, though there’s a weight to his hand that Naruto doesn’t miss. He leans into it all the same, actually presses up into it a little insistently, almost like a cat would. A tender smile and chuckle escape as Kakashi obliges, though he turns protective and serious again a moment later. “But no matter what we decide, please know this: your friends and I, your<em> family</em>, will <em>not</em> let you go without the fight of our lives. That’s a <em>promise</em>.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, heart skipping in his chest. Tears sting, but he just sniffs, chokes back a happy sob, and nods, grinning toothily. “R-right…!”</p>
<hr/><p>After their talk, Naruto’s appetite is a little better than before, so he eats what he can, and that’s all Shikamaru can ask. He refuses his sleeping medicine afterward, though, wanting to wait for Sakura, just in case, and Shikamaru agrees on the condition that he take it once visiting hours are over at the latest. Naruto’s more grateful than he can say, though he’s pretty sure Shikamaru understands with how bright and fond his smile is. He’ll take it.</p><p>By the time Sakura’s presence actually registers in the tree outside Naruto’s room and then the girl herself appears at the foot of Naruto’s bed, it’s well after dark. She’s breathing hard and sweating. She must have run the whole way in her rush to make it in time. The flowers in her arms don’t escape Shikamaru’s notice. So that’s where she’s been.</p><p>“You know it’s after visiting hours, don’t you?”</p><p>Sakura jumps at the sudden voice, though she’s not surprised when she turns toward it to see Shikamaru still sitting vigil by a sleeping Naruto’s side, glaring with arms crossed over his chest. Kakashi’s still here, too, leaning against the wall across from them, just silently observing for now.</p><p>“Technically, Hokage’s student or not, if I were to sound the alarm, you’d be thrown out.” There’s flaying ice in his tone, not that she can blame him. Honestly, he’s being nicer than she expected, than she thinks she deserves. She’s sure he’d agree. “I’m sure you’re also well aware that there are shadows all around you. So tread carefully.” She knows what that means: <em>I won’t hesitate</em>.</p><p>Effectively chagrined, she winces, gaze slipping to the side. “I know…” she acknowledges softly. “But I couldn’t go home without making this right. Or at least…” she lifts the flowers in her hands for emphasis, “…apologizing, <em>if</em> he lets me. I’m…” her grip on the flowers tightens some, doubt dragging down her expression, “…not sure he’ll actually want to see me, though…”</p><p>Sighing roughly, Shikamaru lets one of his arms fall between his knees as he leans on them. This girl’s just lucky she’s Ino’s best friend and one of Naruto’s, <em>and</em> that whether she <em>deserves</em> to be the latter isn’t for him to decide. “Oh, he wants to see you, all right. He made me wait until visiting hours were over to take his sleeping meds, and even then, he was really bummed when you didn’t show up. He wanted to wait a little longer, but I reminded him he promised, and, well,” he shrugs, something in it and the way he looks at her unrepentantly sharp and jagged, “you know how he is about <em>promises</em>.”</p><p>Sakura flinches at that, but…he’s not wrong. She deserves that. Much worse, actually. Frankly, she’s surprised he’s letting her anywhere near Naruto at all. He’s probably only going along with it because he wants to put Naruto’s feelings before his own. Ino was right. A guarding shadow-lion, indeed. Swallowing, she holds the flowers for Naruto a little tighter and nods. “You don’t…have to worry about me anymore. I…I get it now. I’ve been horrible to him…and I <em>know</em> it shouldn’t have taken something like this to understand just how badly I screwed up, but...” she bows as low as she can, “…I really am sorry.” Her green eyes are full of fire when they climb back up. “And I’m <em>ready</em> now, I swear. I’m ready to let Sasuke go and do whatever it takes to make it up to Naruto. <em>All</em> of it, no matter how long it takes. I don’t care.”</p><p>Shikamaru regards her quietly for a few good, long seconds. He freely admits he’s partly doing it to make her squirm. It’s the least she deserves after what she pulled. He’ll have to thank Ino for talking (and, knowing her, smacking) some sense into her later. He can feel Kakashi’s calm, steady gaze on him, waiting to see what’ll happen from here. In the end, he sighs again, gentler this time, and levels with her. “Naruto’s done his part to make this as easy for you as he can, Sakura. Now you have to do yours.”</p><p>Giving that a moment or two to sink in, he slowly sits back in his chair and crosses his arms again, nodding toward Naruto. “He’ll probably be a little groggy, but we just gave him his meds about ten minutes ago, so he shouldn’t be too hard to wake up. Don’t know if he’ll be able to <em>stay</em> awake, though, unless you can temporarily slow the effects or something. Of course, I’m sure I don’t need to tell <em>you</em> that, being a medical ninja and all.” He shrugs.</p><p>She nods, taking that as the permission to come closer she knows it is. “I can. Slow his medication, I mean.” Making sure she has his okay to do this, too, she hesitates before reaching over to let her hand glow green over Naruto’s chest for a few seconds. She stays standing after pulling back, though, and she’s worried about shaking him awake after earlier, even carefully, so Shikamaru does it for her.</p><p>“Hey, Naruto.” The younger boy whines a bit, and Shikamaru can’t help but snicker. “Wake up, sleepyhead. Sakura’s here.”</p><p>Sakura’s name makes it through his formerly-medicated haze, and Naruto’s eyelids flutter open just seconds later. “Wha…? S-Sakura…?” he asks, raspy and slow and dragged out by a yawn as he rubs at his eyes.</p><p>A tiny smile tries to sneak onto her face, but she’s not sure she should let it. She can barely make herself look at him right now. “R-right here, Naruto…” she announces softly.</p><p>Shikamaru helps him sit up, and when Naruto sees it really is her, he seems surprised to see her for a few ticks before he grins brightly, sweetly, like he never lost faith in her for a second. “I told ‘em you’d be back!”</p><p>Sakura, forgetting to breathe for a moment, can’t help it when she laughs and touched tears sting her eyes. Wiping at them with the back of her hand, she shakes her head, the smile on her face growing. “I-I really don’t deserve you, you know that?”</p><p>She has a feeling that if Naruto weren’t here or at least awake, Shikamaru and maybe even Kakashi-sensei would have something to say in agreement with that, but as it is, they hold their tongues. She appreciates it. Naruto, for his part, blinks wide eyes and flushes, waving his hand in front of him in embarrassment. “W-whoa, wait, what? W-where’d that come from, Sakura? That’s not true at all!”</p><p>Her smile turning small and sad, she steps forward to set the flowers Ino picked out for them both on his bedside table. “Yes, it is.” Whether he’s in denial or, more likely, genuinely doesn’t see it that way, she knows she’s right, no matter how much she wishes she wasn’t. Her gaze comes back to his. “You’ve always been there for me, no matter what. You’ve never raised a hand against me, even when you could and <em>should</em> have. You always do everything in your power to protect me. You cheer me up any way you can, and you always keep your promises, even ones that only ever get you <em>hurt</em>—”</p><p>Her voice breaks off in a sob here, and a few tears fall. She supposes she shouldn’t be surprised. She <em>is</em> something of a crybaby, after all. “Y-you’ve <em>never</em> left my side, all this time, and I—I realized I’ve been taking you for—for <em>granted</em>…e-ever since we were kids…” She sniffs and swallows back the rest of her tears. She doesn’t want to cry through this. “You shouldn't even be letting me <em>see</em> you after what I did, let alone talk to you. You <em>definitely</em> shouldn't forgive me. I don’t deserve it, so I wouldn’t blame you at all.”</p><p>She wants to smack some sense into her younger self, feels nauseous at just how ignorant and plain awful she’s been. Realistically, despite Ino and now Shikamaru’s reassurances…she doesn’t know for sure if she and Naruto <em>can</em> fix this. She wants to, and she meant it when she said she was willing to put in the work, but…their relationship was pretty broken right from the start, all because of her. Like she said, she wouldn’t blame Naruto if he came to that conclusion himself and wanted nothing to do with her anymore.</p><p>She bows as low as she can—hell, she gets down on her knees and lets her forehead touch the floor. Ino <em>did</em> say she had to grovel, after all. Whether she meant it literally or not doesn’t matter to her right now, and that’s not why she’s doing this anyway. She’s doing this because it’s what Naruto deserves. He deserves way more than anything she’s given thus far, and from now on, she’s going to make sure he gets it. “I’m sorry. I’m so, <em>so</em> sorry. For tonight and everything else. I know this doesn’t make up for any of it, but…I swear, I’ll spend the rest of my life trying!”</p><p>Naruto, for his part, is left reeling, eyes wide and heart pounding in his chest. He wants to say something, anything, at least get her off the damn floor because it’s <em>killing</em> him to see her like this. He wishes his legs were in better shape so he could get down there with her. There’s no way he can reach her from here either. Frowning in distress, he instantly turns to his friend. “S-Shikamaru, help me out here!”</p><p>Already figuring what he wants, Shikamaru easily slides off his chair to a crouch in front of Sakura without protest. “Sheesh…” He gently takes her small hand and deposits it in Naruto’s waiting one, the blond immediately encasing it in his strong grip. Sakura finally lifts her head, surprised, and Shikamaru pokes her forehead. She blinks, and he finally smiles at her, tilting his head. “Don’t be so dramatic.” Her eyes follow him as he moves back to his seat. “You know, Asuma used to tell us that the closer you get to something, the tougher it is to see it,” he eyes her pointedly here, “so <em>never</em> take it for granted.”</p><p>It takes Sakura a second to understand his meaning, but when it hits her, she doesn't know how she didn't see it before. She took Naruto for granted, and she and Naruto were so close to Sasuke that they couldn’t see how unhealthy their relationships with him were. She gets it now. This is Shikamaru’s way of saying their slate’s clean as long as she really does make it up to Naruto from here on out. Swallowing, she nods imperceptibly to show she understands. Shikamaru smirks, satisfied. Good. She’s learning.</p><p>Getting to her feet, she wipes her eyes and face with her free hand before turning back to Naruto. She points at him with a stern expression. “I’m <em>serious</em> about letting me make it up to you, okay? I won't accept any other way of fixing this!”</p><p>Naruto blinks, but seeing he doesn't have anything to counter that with, he smiles shyly, wondering what she might have cooking up in that big brain of hers. “W-well, okay...but you don't have to go all out or anything, all right? It's just me.” His grin turns toothy as he chuckles. “It's not like I'm exactly hard to please.”</p><p>Despite himself, Shikamaru can't help snorting and chiming in, “Yeah! You could probably just stuff his apartment full of instant ramen, and he'd call it even!”</p><p>Naruto’s joining laugh is raucous and bright. “Hey, you're not wrong!” Looking back at Sakura, he softens and squeezes her hand, sad and happy at once. “Look… This whole thing – letting Sasuke go, and looking at our relationships with him and each other and realizing things weren’t what we thought – has been a long time coming. I think we both know that now. It was bound to be emotional and scary, and I’m sorry if I went about telling you what I decided the wrong way.” He chuckles. “‘Course, I’m not really sure there’s a <em>good</em> way to bring up something like that, you know?” Sakura breathes a tiny, relieved sob of a laugh despite herself and nods. That’s very true. Kakashi marvels at how much he sounds like Kushina.</p><p>Naruto strokes the back of her hand with a gentle thumb and melts. “I accept your apology, and even if you say I shouldn’t, I <em>do</em> forgive you. I understand <em>why</em> you hit me,” he rubs a finger along the bridge of his nose, only to hiss and pull back when it hurts; right, right, broken, “even if that <em>doesn’t</em> make it okay or right.” She winces and nods, and he squeezes her hand again, then threads his fingers securely through hers. “We’re good, okay? I’ll let you make it up to me whatever way you want, but nothing’s changed between us. You’re still one of my best friends. Nothing’s been done that can’t be fixed. Okay?”</p><p>Sakura beams, squeezing his hand as tears sting her eyes. She feels almost lightheaded with relief. “<em>Thank you</em>, Naruto!” Leaning forward slowly, making sure he’s okay with her being this close to him after before, she hugs him carefully and presses a kiss to his cheek. A bright blush paints his face instantly, and her smile only grows. “You’re the best friend I’ve ever had. I promise I’ll be worthy of that someday.”</p><p>She can tell he wants to protest that last part, but he stops when she makes to reach toward his face. Remembering how he flinched away from her before, she stops, too. Swallowing, mint eyes find sky. Sensing the gravitas in her, Naruto just waits for her to say what she needs.</p><p>"Would you...could...my first step be...healing your nose?"</p><p>Beside them, Shikamaru stiffens the tiniest bit despite himself. Her tone is soft and low, nervous and guilty, but full of conviction, body language the same. There’s no trace of the rage or blame from before. He thinks Naruto will be safe this time, but he also remembers how Naruto freaked earlier. All the same, he glances over at Naruto. In the end, it's his decision.</p><p>The blond meets his eyes, and after seeing that Shikamaru’s feelings match his own, he slowly nods. He knows this isn’t like before, and this is his way of showing her that he still trusts her. He meant it when he said that that wasn’t going to change over something like this. Not for him, at least. He hopes this will also help her trust <em>herself</em> again. He smiles. “Yes, please.”</p><p>Sakura is thankful as all hell, shoulders giving way beneath her relief as she sighs and beams like the sun. "<em>Thank you</em>!"</p><p>His nose is fixed in record time, not that he expected any less. He takes a deep breath through it and laughs out loud in delight, throwing his good arm in the air. “<em>All right</em>! Good as new!” He grins widely. “Thanks, Sakura!”</p><p>She scoffs and waves a hand dismissively, meaning it for once. “D-don’t thank me! It’s the <em>least</em> I could do!” Honestly, she wishes she could do more. Perking up when she remembers something, she snaps her fingers. “<em>Oh</em>! That reminds me!” Grabbing his vase from the bedside table, she hands it to him. “These are for you!”</p><p>“<em>Wow</em>…!” Naruto gasps, lighting up like a kid on Christmas at the sight of the pretty bouquet. “They’re for me? Really?” He takes the vase with careful fingers. “I’ve never gotten flowers before, especially not <em>Ino’s</em>!” He chuckles delightedly. “They’re beautiful! Thank you, Sakura!”</p><p>He pats the bed beside him, and she slowly sits down, a warm, grateful thrill going through her. This is another way he’s showing he still trusts her. There’s no way she’s going to waste it. “Ino sent them with me after spending forever picking them out and making them look perfect. She was so happy and relieved to hear you were finally awake and doing well. I’m sure she’ll be by to see you as soon as she can.”</p><p>Naruto admires all the different flowers, smile growing. “That was so nice of her! If you see her before I do, tell her thanks so much for me! I don’t know much about flowers, but these are so pretty!” He bounces a bit in his seat, like he’s been given the most special gift in the world. “She’s the best!”</p><p>Sakura softens. He’s not wrong about that. She really is. “I will, don’t worry.”</p><p>Beside them, Shikamaru can’t help but laugh. He finds Naruto’s reaction sweet, honestly. Expected, knowing him. “Ino didn’t tell you what the flowers meant, though, did she?” Sakura shakes her head. He smirks. “Figures.” Sitting back in his chair, he points them out one by one. “The Blue Salvia means she’s thinking of you, the Pink Rose means joy, the Dwarf Sunflower’s adoration, the Morning Glory’s affection, the Amaryllis’ pride, the Yellow Tulip means there’s sunshine in your smile, the Bluebell’s loyalty, the Geranium means true friendship, the Edelweiss is courage and devotion, the Lotus means enlightenment and rebirth, the Chamomile means patience in adversity, the Larkspur means remember to have fun, the White Hyacinth means she’s praying for your recovery, the White Carnation’s good luck, the Valerian means she’s ready and waiting if you need her, the Honeysuckle means bonds of love, and the Peony means she’s wishing you a happy life.”</p><p>“<em>Wow</em>…! How’d ya know all that, Shikamaru?” Naruto asks, amazed and impressed.</p><p>He shrugs. “When you have the daughter of florists for a teammate, you tend to pick things up between the girl talk, you know?”</p><p>Naruto laughs. “Oh, right. Yeah, that makes sense.”</p><p>Looking back at the flowers, something catches the brunet’s eye. “Hey, look. There’s a tag, too.”</p><p>Sakura tilts her head. “There is? Huh. I never noticed her writing one.”</p><p>Shikamaru reaches in to pull it out. “It says, ‘Get well really soon, you ramen-loving knucklehead! Love, The Konoha 11.’” He chuckles, shaking his head. “Typicao Ino.”</p><p>Naruto rubs the back of his head and chuckles, impressed as hell. “No wonder it took Ino so long to get those flowers ready. That’s a lot of different meanings, and she even included a nice card, too!” He beams, feeling giddy and important. “I feel so special!”</p><p>Sakura, Shikamaru, and Kakashi soften. <em>Because you </em>are<em>, Naruto.</em></p><p>Unable to help noticing the other flowers on his bedside table, Naruto can’t help but ask, intrigued now, “Whose flowers are those, Sakura? Are you visiting someone else, too?”</p><p>Looking over to see what he’s talking about, Sakura remembers and flushes a bit. Grabbing them, she explains, “O-oh, no! Ino handed me these right before I left. She said they’re for me.”</p><p>Taking a look himself, Shikamaru does a double-take before he just barely smothers a wheezing laugh. The others look at him, confused, and he waves a hand. “S-sorry, sorry,” he says. He is <em>so</em> going to laugh his head off once he’s alone! This is too good! Ino is the best, he swears! “I-I’m guessing Ino didn’t tell you what <em>those</em> meant either, huh?” His smirk only grows when she shakes her head again. “W-well, sorry to disappoint, but I’d rather not repeat <em>those</em> particular insults in current pleasant company. <em>Man</em>, you must have <em>really</em> pissed her off.”</p><p>Sakura is shocked for a moment or two, Naruto, too, but then she laughs sheepishly and deflates. “That’s fair… I deserve that…”</p><p>Naruto opens his mouth to protest, but Shikamaru holds up a hand to stop him. A gentle smile comes to his face, and he points out three flowers in the very middle of the bunch. He knows for a fact Ino put them there on purpose. “This White Tulip means forgiveness, this Daffodil means new beginnings, and this Bell Peony means good luck and best wishes.”</p><p>Sakura brightens back up with a joyful, relieved smile, like a flower blooming after it’s rained. Her teacher and friends are glad to see it. “Then I won’t let her message go to waste!”</p>
<hr/><p>They talk for a while longer before Sakura starts nodding off. Her first instinct is to fight it like she has every other time in the last few weeks, but...she stops. Naruto’s awake and here with her, Kakashi-sensei and Shikamaru, too. They’re close and warm and safe. Something tells her she won’t have to worry about nightmares while they’re around. Making sure to undo the impediment she put on his sleeping medicine first, though it won’t take effect for a few minutes, no one is really surprised when she does fall asleep, head resting on the bed at Naruto’s side. Naruto just softens, tender fingers stroking her hair. “We should let her sleep,” he whispers, “since she hasn’t been getting much lately.”</p><p>Kakashi nods in agreement. He’s still so proud and thankful everything turned out so well with his kids. Thank goodness. “That’s probably a good idea. She seems a lot more at ease sleeping here than at home, at least from what her parents told me. I know you’ve probably been wondering what Pakkun and I were talking about earlier, after he brought her in.” Naruto nods, and Kakashi sighs a bit. “Mostly, it was just an update on what I already told you, but this time, it seems she hasn’t slept in at least three days. The nightmares got too bad, so she fought her body’s need to sleep like it was the only thing keeping her going.” He watches her closely, voice lowering. “No sleep was preferable to what she faced when she closed her eyes.”</p><p>Naruto eyes her anxiously. Did she not tell him how bad the nightmares were because she didn’t want him to worry? Was it a pride thing? Did she just not think about it—not <em>want</em> to think about it?</p><p>“<em>But</em>,” Naruto looks back up at the smile in his sensei’s voice, and he doesn’t miss the way he’s watching their resident medic with hope in his eye, “now that she’s got her head and heart sorted on Sasuke <em>and</em> she knows you’re okay, Naruto, it seems her fear of sleep has faded. For the moment, at least. Let’s hope it lasts.”</p><p>Naruto smiles. There’s a thoughtful beat of silence, and then,</p><p>“She’s already totally out. If we try to take her home, she’ll just wake up again,” Shikamaru cautions.</p><p>Kakashi pushes off the wall to come closer. “That was my thought, too. So…” Crouching down, he ever so carefully picks Sakura up and lays her on the bed beside Naruto.</p><p>Said boy jerks away instantly, as far away as he can, face going bright red. The pain from the sharp movement doesn’t even register. “<em>K-K-K-Kakashi-sensei</em>! What the hell are you <em>doing</em>?!” he hisses, scandalized. He shakes his head vehemently and points at his teacher. “Y-you can’t just put a—a <em>girl</em> in my bed! Especially not <em>S-Sakura</em>!” His voice turns to a whine. “She’ll totally kill me when she wakes up, and it’s not even my fault!”</p><p>Kakashi chuckles, and Shikamaru can’t help but do the same. They always figured Naruto was a gentleman, at least for the most part (any student of Master Jiraiya would have to be a <em>bit</em> of a philanderer, at least; it was practically part of the job description), but seeing it is honestly adorable. Kakashi waves calming hands. “Now, now, just listen for a second. Like Shikamaru said, if we move her, she’ll wake up, and she might not sleep well once she’s home, if at all. But if she stays here with you, I’ll bet she’ll sleep like a baby.” Naruto, uncurling a bit as his teacher’s explanation sinks in, doesn’t even realize that he’s getting close to Sakura again. Kakashi, though, does, and he also sees something else that makes his smile grow. “Case in point.”</p><p>Following his gaze, Naruto’s eyes widen as he sucks in a breath and turns even redder. Sakura, curling into his side, rests her head on his chest, right over his racing heart. He gulps and doesn’t dare breathe. His warmth and heartbeat in her ear just seem to comfort her, though, even send her into a deeper, more restful sleep, and Naruto releases his breath painfully slowly. “All—all right, but…” he points warningly at his sensei, “…if she wants to kill me when she wakes up, I’m siccing her on <em>you</em>.”</p><p>Kakashi, for one, prays that doesn’t happen. Her strength is genuinely terrifying… “F-fair enough…”</p><p>That settled, Naruto can feel his sleeping meds kicking back in, so he pulls the blanket up around Sakura and wraps an arm feather-lightly around her shoulders. She curls into him a little more at that, and he can’t help smiling shyly through his blush this time. Her warmth is comforting to him, too. He yawns then, and his eyes move between his friends, lids drooping. “Night, Shikamaru… Night, Kakashi-sensei…” He yawns again, eyes finally closing while his fingers play with the ends of Sakura’s hair. “Love you…”</p><p>He’s out like a light.</p><p>The two left awake look at each other and can’t help but laugh again. Their number one knuckleheaded ninja really is cute as hell. Not wanting to wake them, they stand silent vigil in case of any nightmares.</p><p>Once half an hour’s passed, Kakashi walks over to Naruto’s other side to card his fingers through his hair. Just like Minato’s… He wanted to wait to make sure his kids would be all right before heading home, and now that he is, he thinks he’ll take his leave. Today’s been exhausting for a good many reasons, and honestly, it’s been a long few weeks for him, too.</p><p>But before that…</p><p>He glances up to see Shikamaru watching Naruto thoughtfully, and the older man can’t help but finally say something that’s been on his mind for years, even more the last six months, and especially the past thirteen days.</p><p>“You’re good for him. The way he looks at you… You’re good at grounding him – keeping him on his toes, but not slapping him in the face with harsh reality either. It’s a good balance, not unlike your cloud-watching habits.”</p><p>Shikamaru regards him quietly, eyebrow raised, for a good few moments. “That might be the weirdest connection I’ve ever heard,” he finally returns, chuckling, his gaze falling back to Naruto as his smile turns warm and grateful, “but I’m glad, too. I want to be there for this knucklehead…” his voice lowers, “…no matter what it takes.” There’s undeniable conviction in every note, and Kakashi knows he means every one. “I’m glad you approve,” he tells him, coming back for a moment; he keeps his stare clean and certain, “<em>not</em> that it would make any difference if you didn’t, for the record. I’m here for <em>him</em>. That’s all.”</p><p>Kakashi laughs. “That’s about what I expected from you.” He softens. “I know you’ll be good to him, and that’s all I want. So, thank you.”</p><p>Shikamaru smiles helplessly and shakes his head. “Don’t thank me.” The fondness he fixes Naruto with here is something Kakashi thinks will stay with him forever. He prays Minato and Kushina are watching. They’ll want to see just how loved their boy really is. “He’s the sun, after all. The shadows were bound to be drawn in at some point.”</p><p>Kakashi blinks. Quietly poetic when he wants to be, isn’t he? He just grins, melting when his own gaze drifts back to Naruto. Shadows, indeed…</p><p>“Truer words, Shikamaru. Truer words.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Hopefully this was a satisfying conclusion to this arc! Next chapter, either Gaara or Choji's, will hopefully be shorter! lol. I love this fic, but these long chapters just, well, take too long to write/edit, especially when I'm so busy with work! Haha! Hopefully they're not a bother for you guys to read because I really, really appreciate it! &lt;3</p><p>Also, one of the flowers named in this fic, the 'Bell Peony,' is <i>actually</i> called the Bells of Ireland Peony! But since Ireland obvs doesn’t exist in this world, I changed the name slightly. Haha!</p><p>Also again, as a little Easter Egg: what Shikamaru tells Sakura to say their slate's clean as long as she makes it up to Naruto is a reference to the Asuma-Shikamaru <i>Shippuden</i> opening (Opening 4, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmL3EuiiWXM&amp;t=3s">"Closer"</a>)! The line from the song is, "You know, the closer you get to something, the tougher it is to see it; So I'll never take it for granted", and I adjusted it <i>just</i> slightly to fit with what I needed! I <i>love</i> that opening, and I felt that line could fit really well here! ;D</p><p>Sakura's planned development in this arc/fic reminds me of one of my absolute favorite endings, <i>Shippuden</i> Ending 12, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=67xzoWFas-0">"For You"</a>! Just thought that could be a fun little bit of trivia, if you will, for this fic! lol.</p><p><b>ALSO, an important note that's <i>relevant to this AU</i>, though maybe not necessarily this fic:</b> in this AU, Obito <i>stays</i> dead. He really did die that day on the Kannabi Bridge mission, and someone else is Tobi. Maybe Madara himself, someone actually named Tobi, IDK. lol. Just not Obito. 'Cause frankly, Obito was a sweet, good boy (pre-crazy, yk), and he deserved better, damn it! Plus, it defeats so much of Kakashi's character development/work to move on and heal from that, espec in this fic, if he's been alive this whole time, so I say screw that (one of my most hated things about that 'actually not dead' trope, TBH *side-eyes the Lisanna storyline from Fairy Tail*)! lol. Hope that change is okay with everyone!</p><p>Thanks so much for reading! Can't wait to hear what you think! :D</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0007"><h2>7. Connections</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Naruto tells a few more friends of his decision, during which he gets a little help realizing why exactly Shikamaru hasn't gotten tired of hanging around him yet. (Part 1)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Yooo! Guess who's been working on this <i>and</i> the next chapter virtually every single spare moment between my 2.5 jobs since I last posted? I say that because they were <i>originally</i> going to be <i>one</i> chapter, but haha, <i>yeah</i>, that was before it became a 12k+ <i>monster</i>. Not only was my sanity not having it, I didn't want to kill any of you lovely readers with a chapter that long, so I took mercy on <i>all</i> of us and broke it into two parts! lol. That actually took a lot of agonizing because (not to brag or anything, but) I <i>love</i> how I tied all the different parts in these two chapters together, <i>but</i> it was just getting too long and too stressful, so I cut it. lol. <i>Hopefully</i>, someone still notices at least some of the (admittedly sometimes subtle) connections strewn throughout connecting both chapters, but we'll see! lol. Hoping to have the next chapter, part 2/conclusion of this arc, out tomorrow or close!</p><p>Thanks <i>so much</i> for your patience, guys! Really appreciate it!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s early the next morning, around seven, when there’s a <em>tap, tap!</em> at Naruto’s window.</p><p>Shikamaru wakes almost instantly, and he slowly moves from his chair toward the window with a yawn. He wonders if whoever’s there knows what time it is. The sun’s barely up. Naruto wakes up a few seconds later, pushing himself up against the pillows to try to see who it is. Whoever it is, they’re wearing black. An ANBU member maybe? But why?</p><p>Rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, Naruto asks, voice raspy and slow, “Shikamaru…?” He yawns as well. “W-who is it? And why so early?”</p><p>Shikamaru does a double-take when he gets up close and sees who it is. He half-snorts, a small smile coming. “Figures…” Lifting the latch on the window, he answers, “It’s Sai.”</p><p>Naruto blinks, confused. “Sai…?” Why would he be here?</p><p>Shikamaru nods. “Uh-huh.” With one more yawn and a late lazy wave in greeting, he opens the window and steps aside so Sai can come in. “See for yourself.”</p><p>As promised, the ex-Root ANBU member jumps inside, the Ink Bird he was riding poofing a second later. He raises a hand, a small smile on his face – a pretty big one for him. “Good morning, you two! Kakashi told me you were finally awake, Naruto, so I thought I’d come see you!”</p><p>Cheerful this morning, isn’t he? Another yawn escapes Naruto, this one so long that tears spring to the corners of his eyes. He rubs them again once he’s done. “I appreciate it, but…did you have to come so early? This barely counts as morning…”</p><p>Shikamaru gently raps the back of Sai’s head on his way back to his chair, making the older boy blink in surprise. “Seconded. Some people around here actually sleep <em>past</em> sunrise, you know…”</p><p>It takes a moment before his faux pas registers (Kakashi and Captain Yamato talked to him about this a while ago, when he showed up for a mission or two when they themselves hadn’t even woken yet), and when it does, his eyes widen, and he bows. “My apologies!” He turns immediately toward the window, stepping up onto the sill to head out. “I’ll come back later.”</p><p>Startled, Naruto reaches out. “W-wait, Sai! Hold on!” The pale boy looks back at him, clearly confused, and the blond rubs the back of his head, a sheepish, but also amusedly fond smile on his face. <em>Geez</em>… He can’t help but breathe a laugh. “Sorry, I didn’t mean you had to <em>leave</em>. We’re already up, so you might as well stay, right?” He pats the spot next to him, just an offer. He doesn’t think Sai will take it, of course, not as comfortable with non-combat physical closeness just yet, but it’s there if he wants it. His smile grows. “I’ve actually been wanting to talk to you anyway. I’ve been wondering where you were.”</p><p>Sai blinks a few times and tilts his head a bit. “You wanted…to see <em>me</em>?”</p><p>He nods. “Well, yeah, of course!” His expression softens. “I know you weren’t involved with everything like Sakura and Kakashi-sensei, but I still wanted to make sure you were okay.”</p><p>Sai isn’t entirely sure what the warmth is that spreads in his chest. There’s the tiniest bit of heat in his cheeks, though, and he can feel himself smiling, so…he’s pretty sure he’s very <em>happy</em> that Naruto wanted to check on him. The fact that Naruto thinks it should be <em>obvious</em> somehow makes it even better. “I’ve been just fine, thank you. I’ve been helping Kakashi, Captain Yamato, and the ANBU gather what clues we can find in relation to Sasuke and the masked man who whisked him away the day you fought.”</p><p>Despite himself, Naruto perks up at that. Shikamaru watches out of the corner of his eye. The blond works his mouth like he wants to ask for more details, but doesn’t let himself. He worries his sheets, blue eyes somewhat clouded. He wants to know, but…is it just habit? Does he really even <em>want</em> them to find Sasuke? If they do, next time, it might not end like this one did. Next time, he could end up dead – or worse, one of his <em>friends</em> could. He wants to move on, he’s <em>ready</em> to let go, but…if the two of them meeting again is inevitable…</p><p>His fist curls tighter, though he does his best to take a deep breath, too. He’ll have to sort this out on his own later. Maybe Shikamaru can help him.</p><p>He snaps up when said brunet speaks. “If you’re here and Kakashi was the one who told you about Naruto being awake, I’m guessing that means you haven’t found anything helpful.” A beat. “Otherwise, you’d be out there searching.”</p><p>Naruto blinks. It’s like Shikamaru read his mind, knew what he wanted to say and how before he did. Of course, by now, he’s mostly unsurprised. He softens, gratitude clear as day on his face.</p><p>Sai shakes his head. “Nothing helpful, anyway. Like Kakashi and Sakura said in their reports, it’s like Sasuke and that masked man just vanished into thin air. I think Kakashi was right about that man’s jutsu being something all his own. I’ve never heard of something like that… Not even the Flying Raijin comes close…” He shrugs. “The last thing we found that’s provided us with anything substantial is that redheaded woman Kakashi picked up, but since she spent the first week recovering from the vital wound she claims Sasuke gave her <em>and </em>nearly-depleted chakra levels, she wasn’t able to give us much information. Her healing factor is incredible, though, so she should be better by now. I’ve heard she’s already freely offered some amazing intel, though I don’t know the exact details. Lady Hokage’s put everyone on a need-to-know basis as far as that goes. I only know what Kakashi and Captain Yamato have managed to tell me.”</p><p>Naruto nods. Now he’s even more curious about this mysterious woman he keeps hearing about. Not even because she was with Sasuke (though he’d be lying if he said that wasn’t part of it), just…she sounds confusing, but interesting, and he always likes meeting new people! It’s an opportunity to make a new friend! He really hopes, if he’s lucky, he’ll get to meet her soon.</p><p>He smiles up at his teammate. “Thanks for the update, Sai!”</p><p>Sai blinks, surprised, but then returns the smile a little, a light pink tint to his cheeks again. He likes feeling useful. “Of course!”</p><p>This conversation reminding him, Naruto’s eyes shift to Shikamaru. “Oh! Hey, speaking of updates, Shikamaru, where’d Sakura go?”</p><p>Shikamaru, starting at the sudden topic change, thinks back, and he laughs. “Oh, right. You were still asleep. She left about an hour ago, saying something about needing to tell Lady Tsunade what she did yesterday and accept her punishment. She said she wanted to get it over with. She told me to tell you she’ll be by later, though, <em>if</em> she isn’t too busy with whatever her punishment turns out to be.” He shrugs, leaning back a bit and closing his eyes serenely. “As far as I could tell, she seemed to sleep just fine through the night, though, no nightmares,” he opens one eye to grin at Naruto, “so I’ll count that little experiment as a win.”</p><p>Naruto grins brightly, and Sai doesn’t miss the way Shikamaru softens at the sight. It’s definitely one of his favorites. “That’s great! I’m really happy sleeping here helped that much!” He flushes some. “Honestly, it was really nice having her here. Too bad we can’t do that more often.” Remembering the part about her punishment, though, he shudders in empathy. “I really hope Granny Tsunade isn’t too hard on her. She can be even scarier than Sakura when she’s angry…”</p><p>Sai just looks between them. “I’m sorry, but…” he tilts his head, eyebrow drawing together a bit, the tiniest amused curl to his lips, “…what exactly did I miss?”</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru end up locking eyes for a moment or two before turning back to Sai. The blond sighs. It’s too early for this… But at least he doesn’t have to worry about Sai blowing up at him. Plus, he was gonna find out eventually, and technically, it <em>does</em> directly affect him and his now-definitely-permanent place on Team 7, so…</p><p>They end up explaining everything about Naruto’s decision and how Sakura reacted, then apologized and ended up sleeping beside Naruto to get a good night’s rest for once. Sai listens intently the whole time, curling his fingers at his chin when he gets a little more thoughtful toward the end.</p><p>He nods. “I see… So that explains why Sakura looked so much better than she has lately when I saw her training with Lady Tsunade this morning…” He cocks his head. “Although Lady Tsunade certainly seemed angry and was yelling a lot of profanities for supposed ‘training’…”</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru instantly pale and gulp, trading a glance. Oh, boy… So <em>that’s</em> what her punishment was… Lady Tsunade’s probably pushing her half to death. It’s a good thing Sakura’s strong <em>and</em> has experience in that area, even if her actual years of training weren’t <em>as</em> intense…</p><p>Given a moment, Sai puts it together and laughs behind his hand. “Oh, wait… That must have been the punishment you mentioned… How unfortunate…” He snorts a little, something that makes Shikamaru and Naruto blink. He’s never laughed like that before. He looks surprised himself, cheeks turning almost red, especially when he sees how <em>delighted</em> it makes Naruto. He clears his throat. “R-really, I think Sakura’s the only one who could take a beating like <em>that</em> and walk away smiling.” He glances over at Naruto with a small smile. There’s…admiration and pride in it… “Well, besides <em>you</em>, Naruto.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and his heart skips at the idea of inspiring such feelings in his friend. “T-thank you…?” Thinking back to what he said about Sakura, he grins. “I’m glad she seemed okay! Thanks for letting us know!”</p><p>Sai nods. “No problem.” Then, remembering something, he turns a little more serious. “So…Kakashi told me you might want to know what <em>I</em> think about your decision to give up on Sasuke.”</p><p>Naruto stills, realizing he’s right. He never heard what Sai thought about everything. They got on that tangent about Sakura, so… Swallowing a bit, he nods. “Well, y-yeah…” He shrugs uncomfortably, looking away. Shikamaru shifts so his knee is touching Naruto’s, and the blond sends him a small, grateful smile. He doesn’t like feeling so nervous about everyone’s reactions, but…he supposes it comes with the territory. He takes a breath and looks back at Sai. “I just…want to make sure everyone’s okay with it, you know? Since he…” he winces, “…<em>was</em> one of us and all…”</p><p>Sai tilts his head, brow furrowing. “But…it’s <em>your</em> decision. I don’t see what anyone else’s opinion has to do with it. Especially considering, at least as far as I’m aware, the others have been over Sasuke’s bullshit for years.”</p><p>Shikamaru and Naruto both stare at him, stunned speechless, for a good few seconds before they suddenly burst out laughing. Shikamaru’s is stronger, Naruto subconsciously reluctant, but his soon rises to join him. They end up laughing so hard that tears crowd their eyes. Sai can only look between them, obviously terribly confused.</p><p>When they calm down a couple minutes later, Shikamaru wipes his eyes with the back of his hand. “So, let me guess: you heard that from Ino.” Sai nods, and Shikamaru barks another laugh, rolling his eyes and shaking his head. “Why am I not surprised?”</p><p>Naruto takes mercy on an increasingly baffled Sai, grinning despite himself and waving his hand dismissively. “You’re definitely not wrong!” It’s still weird for him to talk about cutting Sasuke off, and he feels even weirder for laughing about it, but…if he’s being completely honest, it feels <em>good</em>, too. For now, he figures he’ll make the most of it. Taking another breath, he softens, voice following. “Thanks for the laugh, Sai. I needed that.”</p><p>Shikamaru smiles at Naruto proudly, the look he gives Sai appreciative. The black-haired boy blinks and flushes a little, still confused, but sort of getting it, so he just decides to roll with it. Even if he doesn’t quite understand the relationship Sasuke had with the rest of Team 7, he knows this decision is hardest on Naruto, so…he wants to help in any way he can. He offers a small smile in turn. “O-of course! I’m glad I could help.”</p><p>Naruto softens further, over most of his shyness by now. “I’m really glad you’re okay with what I decided, Sai. I know you never really knew Sasuke anyway, and maybe…” his eyes flit away, expression falling a little; Shikamaru reaches over to squeeze his shoulder, making him smile some before coming back, “…maybe that was for the best, but…I wanted to know your opinion anyway. You have a point about not caring what the others think, too, except…to me, it’s the principle of the thing, so I’m still gonna run it by ‘em, see what they have to say, at least.” He breathes a laugh over it, which Shikamaru considers progress. “I’d just rather all of us were on the same page, you know?”</p><p>This part, Sai can understand. Intelligence is a key part of being a shinobi. If one part of a team doesn’t know something vital, everything can fall apart. “That makes perfect sense. I think I get it now.” He smiles and offers a thumbs up. “Good luck, then, Naruto!”</p><p>The blond laughs. “Thanks!” Of course, that grin of his sparks something in Naruto’s mind, and he sits up a little straighter. “Oh, right! Sai, I remembered what I wanted to talk to you about!”</p><p>Sai gives him his full, undivided attention with a small “Hmm?”, and suddenly, Naruto feels a little shy for some reason. Maybe because what he’s about to ask feels private, and he knows Sai isn’t particularly known for sharing that stuff just yet, even with his Cursed Tongue Eradication Seal gone. He wants to choose his words carefully, knowing the Foundation and the abuse he suffered are…complicated subjects for Sai, but when he can’t think of anything except what comes naturally, he decides to just go for it. If Sai doesn’t want to talk about it, Naruto would never force him.</p><p>“So…I know Danzo wasn’t a good guy. He did a lot of horrible things to you and your brother and the others from the Foundation, including Captain Yamato. But…he was still kind of like a sensei or a master to you, even if he didn’t deserve to be called either.” His gaze drifts back to Sai, empathy and a metaphorical outstretched hand there if he wants or needs them. “I just…wanted to know how you’ve been feeling, if you’ve been okay. Since Danzo’s death, I mean.”</p><p>That was probably the clumsiest way he could have asked that, and it kind of makes him want to smack himself, but…well, he tried.</p><p>Sai, on the other hand, is staring at him with wide eyes, lips parted in shock. Clearly, he wasn’t expecting <em>that</em> to be what Naruto had in mind. He looks down at his hand, the hand he’s used to kill so many under Lord Danzo’s order, as if it will give him all the answers he’s seeking. Trying to pin down exactly how and what he’s feeling about Lord Danzo’s death… It’s like using a needle to pin down a leaf in a hurricane.</p><p>“I don’t…know how I feel…” he answers at last, quiet and clearly frustrated with himself if the way he’s glaring at his hand is any indication. “I think there’s…relief, ultimately, some residual anger and…guilt for so much blood on my hands, but…the rest…?” He shrugs helplessly, looking back up at Naruto. If nothing else, he knows he’ll understand. “You know I’m still getting my emotions back, so…”</p><p>Naruto nods, a small, empathetic smile playing.</p><p>“I get it, believe me. After learning some things recently about Old Man Third, I’m…not sure how to feel about him either…” Shikamaru watches him closely, frowning in agreement. It hasn’t escaped him, the way Naruto doesn’t call the Third Hokage ‘Lord Third’ anymore, probably because he’s lost a good amount of respect for him. Honestly? He’s in the same boat. He wonders if there was anything else kept from Naruto that even Kakashi doesn’t know about. For the old man’s sake, dead or not, there’d better not be.</p><p>Sai can only stare. He never <em>officially</em> met Lord Third, and Lord—er, <em>Danzo</em> never really spoke of him, but he knows they worked together often. As far as he could tell, Danzo did Lord Third’s dirty work. But if Naruto and Shikamaru are in agreement here, he knows there must be a reason. Shikamaru is one of the Leaf’s smartest, doesn’t let emotion rule his decisions, and Naruto, while emotional for a ninja and not the brightest in everyday circumstances, doesn’t dislike anyone without a damn good reason. Even his and Sakura’s dislike of him when they first met made a lot of sense once he knew why (not that he made it terribly easy on them either, to be fair).</p><p>Interesting new information aside, he can tell that Naruto is trying to share in his pain, as he’s so often wont to do, and he definitely appreciates it. He smiles gratefully. “Thank you, Naruto. I’m glad you understand.”</p><p>Naruto brightens. “Sure! If you ever need to talk, you know where to find me. I don’t think I’m goin’ anywhere for a while, so,” he grins toothily and gives Sai a thumbs up, “keep Team 7 rolling for me in the meantime, will ya?”</p><p>Sai’s eyes widen, and his heart thumps hard in his chest. He swears his whole world is rippling with some kind of profound change. Naruto is…trusting him with Team 7…! Is this…is this what being truly accepted feels like? Is this what making a real, emotional connection with someone feels like? Does this mean his heart is <em>finally</em> reopening at last?</p><p>He can’t help it when he finally beams, pearly teeth bared for all to see, and he’s only mostly surprised when he feels tears stinging his eyes. Naruto and Shikamaru don’t think they’ve <em>ever</em> seen a smile like this from him before, but it’s incredible. They hope to see it again.</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Thank you</em>
  </strong>
  <em>, Naruto…!</em>
</p><p>“I-I will! Of course!”</p>
<hr/><p>Sai doesn’t stay too long after that, having promised Captain Yamato some early training, but he promises to stop by as soon as he can. “If I get lucky, maybe Sakura and I will end up coming together! It’ll be a New Team 7-plus Shikamaru gathering!”</p><p>After saying their goodbyes, Naruto and Shikamaru sleep for a few more hours. Naruto’s medicine will make him sleep until late morning, if not around noon again like yesterday. Since sleep is an important part of his recovery regimen, Shikamaru doesn’t want him missing much if he can help it.</p><p>As expected, Naruto wakes up for good a little after twelve. For whatever reason, the first thing his eyes are drawn to after the clock is today’s circled date on the calendar. He does a double-take when he sees what day of the week it is. Double-checking the time to make sure he’s not wrong, his gaze falls to Shikamaru, still dozing at his side.</p><p>He softens. He’s sleeping so peacefully that he hates to wake him, but…he knows Shikamaru will hate himself for missing this even more, which will just make Naruto feel guilty. So, reaching over, he gently shakes the older boy awake. “Hey, Shikamaru. Wake up.”</p><p>Shikamaru, having already had his sleep interrupted twice, takes a few seconds longer to wake up than he normally would. Regardless, he glances up at Naruto first thing on instinct. Brown eyes meet blue, assessing and reassuring at once. “W-what’s up?” He yawns. “You okay?”</p><p>Naruto can’t help but chuckle, softening further. He really is so kind. He squeezes Shikamaru’s shoulder and nods. “Yeah, I’m fine. Don’t worry about me.” He points toward the clock and calendar. “I just didn’t want you to be late. Today’s when Kurenai-sensei has her baby checkup, right? Isn’t it usually around now?”</p><p>His words take a second to register in Shikamaru’s mind, but once they do, any residual drowsiness disappears instantly. Wide eyes darting to check the date and time, he shoots to his feet. “Oh, <em>crap</em>, you’re right!”</p><p>Looking back at Naruto, he studies him with a bemused smile. “Wait, how’d you even know that? You only went with me the one time…”</p><p>Even then, though, the fact that Naruto would remember something like this…it’s not surprising. Not at all, really – not when the brunet knows intimately that things that seem small or insignificant to others aren’t at all to Naruto.</p><p>Something as small as bringing flowers when he’s in the hospital, as holding him while he breaks down, as <em>being there</em> when he wakes from a nightmare…as <em>smiling</em> at him, <em>crying</em> for him, telling him how much he <em>means</em> to them…things that others would see as normal or the least they could do, things most people would take for granted…they’re <em>everything</em> to him.</p><p>The reason Naruto remembers these things, sees them as so precious…it all comes back to love. To him, they’re proof he’s not hated anymore – not <em>alone</em> anymore. It means he has people in his life he loves more than anything—and the best part is, <em>they</em> love <em>him</em>, too!</p><p>Love is all it’s <em>ever</em> been about for him.</p><p>And for all Shikamaru knows that, has always known that somehow, in the back of his mind, even years ago when they were kids…he can’t help but melt. ‘Something else’ doesn’t come <em>close</em> to describing him, he decides.</p><p>Naruto, oblivious to the complex goings-on in his friend’s head, just grins toothily, satisfied with himself. A mischievous chuckle leaves him. “Hey, I pay attention!” Given a moment, his expression and voice gentle. “That was the day you helped me start to move forward again after Pervy Sage...” His smile falters here for a moment before pained acceptance washes over, and when he looks up at Shikamaru again, his smile’s grown, gratitude there in spades. “So, of <em>course</em> I’d remember something like that, you know?”</p><p>Touched empathy burns in Shikamaru’s chest. He’s not quite shocked when he has to swallow the smallest of lumps in his throat. He thinks hanging around Naruto almost exclusively for so long is making the guy rub off on him. He’s getting more emotional as the weeks pass, he swears. He nods, a warm smile coming. “Yeah, I get it.” He glances toward the door. “You sure you’ll be okay here by yourself while I’m gone?”</p><p>Naruto waves him off with an even wider grin. “I’m not a baby! Go, go!”</p><p>Shikamaru smirks teasingly. “You say that, but <em>you’re</em> the one who used to sneak out of the hospital all the time.”</p><p>Naruto sticks his tongue out at him, grin never leaving. “Hey, sue me! It’s boring!”</p><p>Shikamaru laughs, then hurries for the door, waving and calling over his shoulder, “Thanks, Naruto!”</p><p>Naruto waves back. “No problem! Say hi for me!”</p>
<hr/><p>Naruto’s pretty sure he forgot <em>just</em> how boring being stuck in the hospital could be.</p><p>His mind has been wandering ever since Shikamaru left. He tried sleeping more, but his body wouldn’t let him, so he’s been reading over the mission reports that Shikamaru brought with him. Or, well, trying. Like he said, his mind’s been everywhere.</p><p>He wonders if this intense boredom is another reason Shikamaru wanted to stay with him.</p><p>When he was younger, he’d always sneak out to train or eat ramen when he was bored, but…with his legs not quite in working order yet (Granny Tsunade tried to explain it to him – not only does he have some broken bones, but also some kind of severe weakness in his legs from Sasuke managing to mess with his chakra network there and the chakra depletion not helping?), he can’t really do that this time. Not that he thinks he would – he’s grown up since then, after all – but if he got desperate enough, well… Who knows, really?</p><p>That <em>is</em> something he’s been wondering about, though. He gets Shikamaru staying with him while he was out since his health was so touch-and-go, also coming to be with him at night because of the nightmares, but now that he’s awake and okay, even if the nightmares are iffy…why stick around? Doesn’t he have missions and stuff he should be doing – or, hell, cloud-watching with Choji during their downtime?</p><p><em>Not</em> that he’s complaining! On the contrary, Shikamaru’s been incredible, so much more than he really thinks he deserves, honestly. He loves having him here, getting to spend so much time with him. He can’t remember the last time they were really able to do that, without a mission or enemy hanging over their heads, at least. Maybe the day Shikamaru helped him start to move on after Pervy Sage’s death, but that was months ago.</p><p>He just doesn’t want Shikamaru to be missing out on money or getting in trouble with Granny Tsunade for not going on missions. Plus, Choji’s his best friend, Ino’s one, too, and he knows he’s pretty close with his parents, especially his Dad. He doesn’t want to keep him from his loved ones, from people who’d miss him if he’s not around.</p><p>He hopes it’s not because of that time off he asked for. He knows Shikamaru said he wasn’t sick, and he really does trust him, but he <em>did</em> say he was exhausted, so… He just hopes he’s okay.</p><p>Maybe, one of these days, when he can find the right words, he’ll ask him about it.</p>
<hr/><p>At some point, he <em>must</em> have fallen asleep again because when he opens his eyes, the sun is starting to go down. Huh... Knowing Shikamaru must be back by now, he looks to his left—and blinks a few times when he doesn’t see him. That’s weird. Maybe he read his mind and went to go have a night with his family for once or something.</p><p>But then, he notices a note left on his nightstand. Recognizing Shikamaru’s mostly neat, but somehow still messy scrawl, he reaches over to see what it says.</p><p>
  <em>Naruto,</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Hopefully you’ll still be asleep when I get back so you won’t have to read this, but just in case, I went to go get you something to eat that’s not hospital crap. Be back soon.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Shikamaru</em>
</p><p>He can’t help but laugh. He <em>has</em> been getting sick of the hospital food, but he thought he’d been pretty subtle. It’s good and nutritious, sure, but it’s just not what he’s used to, you know? He softens, neatly folding the note and carefully tucking it in between his flowers, right beside Ino’s tag. Most people would probably find notes like these a small thing, nothing important enough to keep, surely. But they’re way more than that to him. They’re sweet, well-wishing notes from his amazing friends, and he’s not just gonna throw them away. Anyone who thinks he would doesn’t know him at all. He knows Shikamaru would understand.</p><p>He really appreciates Shikamaru doing this. He didn’t have to. He would’ve been fine sticking with just hospital food till he’s out of here. Sure, that’ll take a while, but like he said, it’s not like the food’s bad. He’ll pay Shikamaru back whenever he gets here.</p><p>
  <em>Knock, knock!</em>
</p><p>Naruto looks to the door. That can’t be Shikamaru. He would know he doesn’t have to knock, and if it’s because he doesn’t have hands for some reason, he’d use his leg or something smart like that. Maybe it’s Sai or Sakura again? “Come in!”</p><p>The one who cautiously steps inside isn’t at all who he expects, but Naruto brightens immediately all the same. “<em>Choji</em>!”</p><p>Choji gasps in turn, beaming. “<em>N-Naruto</em>!” The blond can already hear the tears in his voice, so he’s not surprised when they appear a second later. Normally Choji would hide his face so no one would see his tears, but he knows Naruto is the last person who’d ridicule him for crying, especially when he’s <em>happy</em> and <em>relieved</em>.</p><p>The next thing Naruto knows – something he’s getting used to by now, honestly – Choji’s hugging him. Unlike the rest who’ve hugged him so far, more like Shikamaru’s that first night, he’s as gentle with him as can be. Not that Naruto expected anything else. Choji’s always been the gentlest of them. But this time, it’s almost like he’s <em>afraid</em> to touch him, like he thinks he’s made of glass or something.</p><p>Returning the embrace, Naruto just breathes the tiniest sob of a laugh. He’s touched that anyone would think he’s <em>that</em> worth saving, worth protecting. “You’re not gonna hurt me, you know,” he reassures softly. “Trust me, if Granny Tsunade, Iruka-sensei, and Sakura can’t hurt me, <em>you</em> definitely can’t.” As if to prove it, he hugs Choji a little tighter, only one arm be damned, and nuzzles into his friend’s shoulder. His voice drops to barely above a whisper. “I missed you, too, Choji.”</p><p>That seems to open the floodgates. The tears are really coming now, soaking his shoulder, but he doesn’t mind. Choji starts doing that sobbing-snort thing he does when he’s really worked up. Naruto rubs his back to try to soothe him. “I-I was so—so <em>worried</em>…! Shikamaru always updated me whenever I asked—a-and I knew he was with you, so you weren’t <em>alone</em>, but—but still…! You’ve been hurt before, but never like—!” A big shudder runs through him, and Naruto just holds him tighter. His voice is a little quieter, weaker, when he speaks next. “I-I was with Shikamaru, you know, w-when you were in surgery... I-I got here as f-fast as I could, and we waited for hours... W-when Lady Tsunade finally—when you were okay…!” He shakes his head. “I-I hadn’t felt that kind of relief in—<em>f-forever</em>…!”</p><p>Naruto just listens closely. This is all news to him. He didn’t know that, that he and Shikamaru were outside while he was in surgery, that they waited for him. Is <em>that</em> why Shikamaru stayed? Because he needed to see for himself that Naruto was going to be okay? But then…why stick around now? Just to make sure?</p><p>“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I didn’t mean to worry you, I swear.” He feels like he’s repeating that a lot these days, but well, he has a lot of apologies to make.</p><p>Choji just shakes his head again, tightening his own hold on Naruto. He sniffs. “D-don’t be... You were p-protecting your teammate and sensei…t-the Leaf besides… N-no one can fault you for that, n-not really…”</p><p>Naruto hums thoughtfully. So Choji, Kakashi-sensei, and Shikamaru, while worried, have the same opinion on this, huh? They’re more level-headed in their thinking than the rest of the Konoha 11 and company, so it makes sense. Plus, knowing their gentle hearts and personalities, it makes even more.</p><p>“I just wish— S-Sasuke almost—” A strangled whine escapes, a small growl, too. “<em>Again</em>—!” Choji’s having trouble getting his thoughts in order, feeling too many things at once. Naruto just holds him and waits, nuzzles in a little more. He can be patient when he needs to be, and his friends’ comfort will always come first. After a few minutes, Choji takes a deep, shaky breath. His voice is brittle and wobbly, almost haunted, when he speaks up, so quiet that Naruto might not have heard it if not for his enhanced hearing. “You could’ve <em>died</em>…”</p><p>Naruto is quiet for a long moment. As the Nine Tails’ vessel, contemplating his own mortality isn’t exactly new for him, but he doesn’t expect Choji (any of his friends, really, sans the ones who were here for yesterday’s conversation) to think of that. Of course not. Instead, in an attempt to cheer his friend up, he tacks on one of his trademark never-say-die grins and offers, “We’re ninjas. It’s an occupational hazard.”</p><p>Choji snorts wetly in surprise, then pulls back to throw his head back and laugh out loud through his tears. Naruto beams and chuckles triumphantly, handing his friend a few tissues while he sinks into the mattress at his side. “You always were funny like that…” Choji sniffs, wiping his face. “Always good at cheering me up when the other kids made fun of me…”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, cheeks flushing a bit. He didn’t think he remembered that. He rubs the back of his head, a shy smile and laugh playing. “Nah, that was mostly Shikamaru! I just did what I could when he wasn’t around or when you guys needed backup! I figured it was better if the other kids picked on me instead!”</p><p>Because Naruto was used to it and didn’t mind if it meant protecting them…</p><p>Choji just stares at him, realization dawning. Of course… Of <em>course</em> that’s why he did it. He thinks he kind of understood it as a kid, at least partly (Shikamaru understood the whole thing, he’s sure), but now…now, he really does.</p><p>Oh,<em> Naruto</em>…</p><p>He breathes a laugh and smiles at Naruto in such a soft, endlessly <em>kind</em> way that it makes the blond’s heart skip and his blush deepen. “<em>Thank you</em>, Naruto.” He beams. “For being such a good friend all these years.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen again as he turns even redder and his breath leaves his lungs. His heart stutters in his chest, and he has to swallow back touched tears, though he can still feel the tiniest sting at the corners of his eyes. Oh, well. He knows Choji, of all people, won’t mind. He mirrors the other’s expression, giving a thumbs up on top of it. “Right back at ya!”</p><p>A comfortable silence falls between them, and for a few moments, things are nice. Of course, then Choji’s worries and even anger about Sasuke and what he did to Naruto float back into the blond’s mind, and blue eyes drift to his bad arm, the one he can’t move, never mind his busted legs. He supposes he should tell him now, while he can. He’s…maybe Choji already knows about his decision, being Shikamaru’s best friend, one of Ino’s, too, but…just in case… He doesn’t want to assume anything.</p><p>He takes a reedy, still steadying breath. At least with Choji, being as kind and loving as he is, he doesn’t think he’ll have to worry about him having a bad reaction. But still...he wants to be careful, with <em>all</em> his friends’ hearts and feelings. The change in him doesn’t escape Choji’s notice, but he just waits. He can tell Naruto’s about to get whatever it is off his chest.</p><p>“So…do you already know? Did…Shikamaru tell you?” the blond asks slowly, hesitantly, keeping his eyes averted. He doesn’t think Shikamaru would do that, not really into sharing others’ mindsets without their consent, but still. If he did, it would save Naruto some of the heartache he goes through every time he tells another friend. Of course, Naruto’s sure that’s partly the grief talking, the pain. At least, that’s what he figures it is. This is…his first brush with this stuff, after all. Honestly, part of him wishes the shadow wielder was back already. It’s been really nice, having his support through telling all the others so far. “What I decided about...Sasuke, I mean…”</p><p>Choji tilts his head a bit, concerned. “I know it’s <em>about</em> Sasuke, but as far as specifics go, I don’t know anything. Shikamaru and Ino said it wasn’t their place to tell me that part, just that I should be prepared. They figured you’d tell me on your own.”</p><p>Naruto takes another deep breath, through his nose and out his mouth this time. He’s picking up Shikamaru and Kakashi’s calming exercises, it seems. He’s grateful to find it really does help. “I see…”</p><p>He goes on to tell Choji everything, and he’s a bit surprised, but also happy when he doesn’t cry too much this time. And when he does cry, though Choji tries to hold it back to try to be strong for him, <em>he</em> cries, too. It makes Naruto feel like less of a baby, so he appreciates this odd little camaraderie they have going.</p><p>The next thing he knows, the Akimichi boy’s pulling him in for another hug, even tighter than the last, and Naruto’s shocked for a few seconds before he returns it, burying his face in Choji’s shoulder. “I know this is hard for you… I can’t imagine how much…”</p><p>
  <em>—!</em>
</p><p>Naruto swears those words go straight through his heart. His breath hitches in his throat as heat flares behind already-teary eyes, filling them to the brim and overflowing. He blinks at the sting, a lurching sob escaping without warning. No one’s really…acknowledged that yet…so it hasn’t really sunk in till now... It <em>hurts</em>… It <em>really</em> does, <em>so</em> much… What really kills him, too, is he knows now…that Sasuke isn’t truly <em>worth</em> this much pain…</p><p>“But…” Choji squeezes him gently to get his focus back, “…I think you’re doing the <em>right thing</em>, Naruto… The <em>best</em> thing you can. I mean that.”</p><p>Slowly, gently, he pulls away so he can look his friend in his bright blue eyes, and while he has his attention, he takes the time to wipe away a stunned Naruto’s tears with tender thumbs. “You’ve always deserved someone more like you, but different, by your side, and Sasuke… He’s not it.” Grinning, he snorts and teases, “Hey, maybe it’ll be Shikamaru! You and I can share him like a bag of chips!”</p><p>Naruto blinks wide eyes, and it takes him a few seconds longer than it usually might to understand that Choji’s joking, so caught up in the emotion of it all. But when he does, his smile is bright and jubilant, much like the laughter that comes with it, and Choji will stand by it being a sight to behold.</p><p>Drying his eyes a little more, Naruto softens lovingly at his friend. “Thanks, Choji. I think I needed that.” He sniffs. “And I’m glad you’re…okay with it, everything. I really appreciate the support.”</p><p>Choji snorts. “After all this? I wouldn’t be a good friend if I weren’t!” Naruto flushes happily at that. Another comfortable silence falls, and after a minute or two of looking around to make sure he’s not missing anything, Choji finally asks what’s been on his mind since he walked in. “So, speaking of Shikamaru, where is he anyway?”</p><p>Naruto perks up, remembering. “Oh, yeah! While I was asleep, he left a note saying he went to get me something that wasn’t hospital food,” he has the grace to look sheepish, “since I’ve been getting kinda sick of it lately.” He waves his good hand in front of him. “I-I didn’t tell ‘im that myself,” he shrugs, “but you know how perceptive he is. He should be back soon, I think.” He tilts his head, a warm, knowing smile coming to his face. “You probably came looking for him, right?”</p><p>Choji nods. “Partly, yeah. His mom sent me to tell him to come home once in a while. She misses him.” He chuckles while Naruto’s brows knit together some. His mom…? “The other reason was to see you. I figured, two birds, one stone.” He scratches his cheek. “I was actually surprised when I walked in and didn’t see him.” He snorts. “To be honest, I didn’t think <em>anything</em> would make him leave you.”</p><p>Naruto blinks dumbly. “W-wait, what? What are you talking about?”</p><p>Choji opens his eyes wide. “Wait, you mean he didn’t tell you?” Then, realizing what he’s saying, he snorts and snickers. “Oh, right. Of course he didn’t.”</p><p>Leaning forward to give the illusion of privacy, never mind that they’re the only ones here, he tells Naruto, “The truth is, Shikamaru hasn’t left your side since you were brought in. Kakashi-sensei and Sai have been helping the ANBU look for Sasuke, and Sakura was holed up in her house till last night, but Shikamaru’s stayed here this whole time. He hasn’t left once.” He shrugs. “Till now, apparently. He even risked Lady Tsunade’s wrath by calling in a special favor to be temporarily relieved of assignments, at least until you’re better.”</p><p>Leaning back, Naruto can only sit there in shock and stare, blue eyes wide. He doesn’t… For <em>him</em>…? But…<em>why</em>…?</p><p>As if Choji can read his mind, he says softly, “To Shikamaru…<em>you</em> were more important.”</p><p>Like a stone making ripples on a still lake, that does it. Naruto is reeling. It actually leaves him breathless, the idea of being that important to someone.</p><p><em>This</em> must be what Shikamaru meant before when he talked about his special request. That…also explains the secret little smile and laugh he gave him afterward…</p><p>When he first woke up to find Shikamaru here, he remembers being so appreciative because he knows that the brunet doesn’t put his time and effort into anything he doesn’t deem worth it. And yet, he’s been here for…today makes two weeks? Of that, there were ten, almost eleven, <em>entire</em> days where he must have been bored out of his mind. Hasn’t he missed his family? Hasn’t he missed hanging around Ino and Choji? Hell, how have his neck and back not been aching like crazy from sleeping against the wall or leaning on the bed for so long? Maybe they <em>are</em>, and he just hasn’t said anything.</p><p>But still…the <em>why</em> of it…—!</p><p><em>That’s</em> when it hits him.</p><p>Back when he was wondering if Shikamaru missed being with the people he loves while he’s with him…</p><p>He never considered—never <em>realized</em> till now, not truly, friends or not—</p><p><em>He</em> is one of the people Shikamaru loves, <em>too</em>…</p><p>He looks at Choji like he’s told him the best news he’s heard since he woke up from his sort-of coma, taking a deep, almost gasping breath as touched tears spring to his eyes. He breathes a laugh, the beam on his face rivaling the sun outside his window.</p><p>“I love him, too…” he says softly, all too happily, not that he thinks Choji doesn’t already know. Of course he does. Anyone who sees them together knows it. Naruto loves his friends – his <em>family</em> – more than anything else in the entire world, and Shikamaru’s always been a special case. Hell, he’s not even sure he’s really <em>telling</em> Choji anything so much as…just stating a fact.</p><p>Choji softens. He’s so glad Naruto and Shikamaru have each other. From what he’s seen and heard, Naruto’s going to need someone strong and dependable, but also kind and caring to lean on through this.</p><p>And in Choji’s opinion? There’s no one better than Shikamaru.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>All of you who take the time to comment on these chapters I work so hard on/put my soul into, <i>thank you so much, from the bottom of my heart and soul</i>! I know I have a lot of quiet readers, too, and thank you so much for reading as well! I love you all!</p><p>That said, I'm always curious to know what my fics make people think, and I realized I hadn't asked this yet, so I'd like to take a moment to open the floor to ask if there's anything I can do to improve my writing! Is the fic boring at all? Does the present tense turn anyone off? Maybe the (increasing, despite my best efforts) chapter length? How's the plot/pacing? Is the characterization wrong/not good enough/missing something? I will take any insight you have to offer (just please be kind about it)! Even emojis and keyboard smashes are amazing! If you want to leave more kudos, but can't, you can always leave a heart in the comments! Whatever floats your boat! lol. Thanks a lot!</p><p>(Sidenote: If anyone gets the "How to Train Your Dragon" reference, I love you!)</p><p>Thanks so much for reading, as always!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0008"><h2>8. Eat Ramen with Your Friends</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Choji, Shikamaru, and Naruto eat dinner together, and Tsunade comes to give Naruto some good news. That night, Naruto proposes a new sleeping arrangement. (Part 2/Arc conclusion)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>This is days later than planned, lol, but I ended up being busier this week than I thought, so I'm just glad I got it done! Hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>Shrrrrt!</em>
</p><p>About half an hour later, around mid-sunset, the door slides open. Shikamaru walks inside with a big white bag in one arm, closing the door behind him with his other hand. He blinks upon seeing his best friend sitting at Naruto’s side. “Oh, hey, Choji!” Then, a second later, “Naruto, you’re awake!”</p><p>Naruto beams, raising his good hand in greeting. “Hey, Shikamaru! You’re back!”</p><p>Choji doesn’t miss the way Shikamaru smiles when he sees Naruto up and about <em>or</em> the way Naruto’s eyes light up when he sees Shikamaru come in. He files those away to laugh about with Ino later.</p><p>Shikamaru moves to set the bag on the nightstand, smirking fondly. “I told you I’d be back as soon as I could, didn’t I?” He doesn’t have to ask to know Naruto found and read his note.</p><p>Naruto nods, knowing exactly how lucky he is. He asks excitedly, “So, how’d it go? How’s Kurenai-sensei? Is the baby doing okay?”</p><p>Shikamaru softens at Naruto’s enthusiasm. “It went well, as always, thankfully. Kurenai-sensei only has a little while to go till her due date, but she’s still bustling right along.” He rubs the back of his neck, tired and exasperated in one. “I keep trying to tell her to let me help more, but she’s stubborn.” He chuckles. “Figures Asuma would go for <em>that</em> type.”</p><p>Choji laughs, too. “Yeah, that’s true. Though in his defense, they liked each other since the Academy.”</p><p>Shikamaru sighs resignedly, though the smile never leaves his face. “Fair point.”</p><p>“What about the baby?” Naruto presses, bouncing a bit with anticipation to know more. “Does she know if it’s a boy or a girl yet?”</p><p>Shikamaru pauses, confused, but then laughs delightedly. “Oh, that’s right!” He turns to face Naruto fully, crossing his arms comfortably over his chest. “<em>She</em> is just fine! Kurenai found out it was a girl a little over a week ago, while you were still asleep. Sorry, I forgot you didn’t know.”</p><p>Naruto shakes his head, too excited to care. He’s never had a friend have a baby before! Even if she’s a sensei and he doesn’t know her very well, he’s still excited! There are practically stars in his eyes. Shikamaru can’t help but melt. “Does she have any names in mind yet? Did—did she and Asuma-sensei pick any out?”</p><p>He might not know much about babies or couples and that stuff, but he knows that’s something they do when they’re going to have a baby! He hopes that isn’t a touchy subject. Shikamaru tilts his head as he thinks back. “Kurenai said they’d picked out a few for each sex, but she said their plan was to decide when they saw the baby for the first time, so…” he shrugs, smile a little pained at the knowledge that his sensei won’t get to be part of it, but ultimately happy and proud, too, “…she’s sticking to that.”</p><p>Naruto blinks. “Huh. I didn’t know you could wait that long to name a kid…” He grins. “I’m sure whatever Kurenai-sensei comes up with, it’ll be great! And if it’s a girl, maybe she’ll turn out super pretty like her! <em>Ooh</em>, maybe with Asuma-sensei’s super cool energy!” He gasps excitedly. There are <em>definitely</em> stars in his eyes now. “Once she’s old enough, maybe she could even use his chakra blades!” He mimics some of Asuma’s motions with his good arm. “That’d be <em>so cool</em>!”</p><p>Shikamaru and Choji can both see it now. Kurenai’s eyes and hair with Asuma’s facial structure and signature weapons. “<em>Definitely</em> awesome!” they agree as one, grinning at each other after a moment of surprise.</p><p>Both of them can’t help but soften at Naruto, how excited he is about all this. He barely knows Kurenai and hardly knew Asuma (through no fault of his own; none of the other senseis tend to interact with each other’s kids), but he’s still this excited about their baby. Really, they suspect he’d be like this with any friend’s baby, but still. He really is a sweet guy… It’ll be interesting to see how he is with the baby once she’s born.</p><p>Almost forgetting about Naruto’s dinner in all the excitement, Shikamaru turns back to the task at hand. Taking a carefully-packed box out of the bag he brought in, he opens it.</p><p>The smell that instantly fills the room is one that Naruto would know <em>anywhere</em>. His eyes widen, and he gasps as his stomach growls furiously, looking up at Shikamaru like he hung the damn sun in the sky. Choji barely holds back a laugh, especially when he swears he sees <em>tears</em> in his eyes. “You—you got me <em>Ichiraku</em><em> ramen</em>?”</p><p>A light blush paints Shikamaru’s cheeks, and yet he can’t help but laugh anyway. Honestly, he’s so easy to please... The smile he gives Naruto is fond as hell, a bit teasing besides. “What kind of friend do you take me for? It’s your favorite, and you’re in the hospital, for God’s sake. I’m not gonna just get you <em>anything</em>.” Glancing back in the box, Shikamaru blinks, brow furrowing. “Huh. That’s weird…”</p><p>Naruto cranes his neck to try to see. “What? What’s weird?”</p><p>Shikamaru reaches in to pull out an extra-large, still-steaming bowl of ramen, two smaller bowls, and three sets of chopsticks. “Since when does Ichiraku give you all this with an order?” He snorts. “What, do they really think <em>you</em> would have leftovers?”</p><p>Naruto is equally confused for a split second before he lights up and shakes his head as vigorously as a dog getting water out of its fur. “No, no! I get it!” He laughs, beaming, and points at both his friends. “Teuchi knows I love ramen best when I get to share it with people I love! He put those bowls in there for you guys!” He chuckles, glancing at the Akimichi clan member. “Though I don’t know <em>how</em> he knew <em>you’d</em> be here, Choji.”</p><p>Shikamaru and Choji blink, but they can’t say they’re surprised. Not at all, actually. This is <em>Naruto</em>. Of <em>course</em> he’d be sentimental like that.</p><p>Choji snorts. “Just luck, I guess!” Rubbing his hands together, he licks his lips. “Oh, boy! I haven’t had Ichiraku’s in forever!”</p><p>Shikamaru starts doling out their portions, leaving the biggest one for Naruto, of course. Despite any protests he might try, <em>he’s</em> the one recovering. He needs to keep his strength up more than the rest of them. Still, he snorts in turn, unable to help smirking. “That’s only because, somehow, you <em>never</em> get sick of barbecue!”</p><p>“Well, do <em>you</em> ever get sick of cloud-watching?”</p><p>A beat, after which Shikamaru sighs and hands off his share. “Shut up and take your bowl already.”</p><p>Choji cheers. “All right! Thanks, Shikamaru!”</p><p>Hearing that, Naruto perks up the smallest bit as he remembers. “Oh, yeah! Shikamaru, how much was it?” Looking around, behind his pillow and under his covers, too, he frowns. “As soon as I find my clothes, I’ll be able to find my wallet and pay you back…”</p><p>Shikamaru glances up from filling Naruto’s bowl. “Oh, right. I almost forgot.” He grins. “Teuchi and Ayame said it’s on the house and to feel better soon! They told me to make sure to tell you that they miss their favorite customer and they’re so glad you’re awake and going to be okay!” He chuckles, affection for the two coming through. Anyone who loves Naruto is more than okay in his book. “I’m not kidding either when I say Teuchi <em>cried</em> when I told them why I was there. Ayame and I were both worried he was going to pass out from relief!”</p><p>Shikamaru passes Naruto his bowl before sitting down in his chair with his own. Naruto, for his part, smiles warmly, almost nostalgically, into his ramen. “Thanks, old man…” he offers quietly before blowing on it and starting to eat. It’s the tiniest bit crowded with all of them eating within a few inches of each other at best, but honestly? Naruto couldn’t be happier if he tried, and that’s all that matters to his friends. This is <em>exactly</em> what he had in mind.</p><p>They eat in silence for several minutes, just enjoying the ramen and each other’s company, and they all must have been hungrier than they thought because their food is gone in record time. Even Naruto’s, and he had the biggest portion, not that they’re particularly surprised.</p><p>The only thing left in Naruto’s bowl is, perhaps appropriately, a little <em>naruto</em> fish cake, and he can’t help but feel sentimental again. He’s never told anyone this story, but…</p><p>“You know, when I was little, I ran out of food and money a lot.” Shikamaru and Choji look up, startled, and while they’re not entirely sure what brought this on or where it’s going, they listen closely regardless. “All the time, really. Not that I didn't try to be careful, of course,” he chuckles a bit, smiling, though it’s a little sad, too, “but when you're a growing kid with a freaking demon fox sealed inside you, you’re always hungry, so you eat more.” He rubs the back of his head. “I don’t think Old Man Third really took that into account in the budget…”</p><p>Choji doesn’t really understand that last part, but Shikamaru has to bite his lip to keep from cursing, grip on his bowl tightening. The more things he learns about the way Lord Third treated Naruto, the more his true character comes to light – and Shikamaru <em>doesn’t</em> like what he’s finding.</p><p>“Anyway, I think I was…maybe four or five at the time, and I hadn't had anything to eat in two days when these older kids tried to gang up on me after Academy classes got out. I tried to fight back, but I was weak and tired, so eventually, I tried running instead. They were really good, though, and they definitely wanted a piece of me. Not that I wasn't <em>used</em> to that by then, but still, you know?” He breathes a sardonic laugh. Choji and Shikamaru wince, the older clenching a fist and gritting his teeth. “I was desperate to find a place to hide because I knew I wouldn't be able to get away, but everywhere I tried, they threw me out, sometimes literally. It was raining really hard by then, and I was soaked to the bone.</p><p>"Finally, I ducked inside a tiny ramen shop that I prayed somehow didn’t know who I was and hid until the bullies gave up and left. I was going to make a run for it, but...then I smelled the best thing I’d ever smelled in my whole life. I knew I needed to go home and change before I got sick, but I couldn’t make myself move. I was just so <em>hungry</em>…” He chuckles. “And then, all of a sudden, Teuchi waved to me and tried to call me over. I thought he wanted to hurt me, too, so I bolted, but then I happened to hear him say, ‘Oh, no…I scared him away… Poor kid…’”</p><p>Naruto breathes a wry laugh, playing idly with the fish cake sitting soaked and alone at the bottom of his bowl. His expression is the haunted one Shikamaru hates to see so much, but there’s hope in it, too, gratitude and light, and…Shikamaru desperately wants to know why, what it means. How it got there. Who to get down on his knees and thank.</p><p>“At the time, I-I didn’t know what that meant. I didn’t know what pity was, and I didn’t know what sympathy was either. I’d only ever been <em>hated</em> by everyone in the village before that. Called names, pushed around, chased, beat up.” Shikamaru’s knuckles crack, and Choji’s aren’t far behind. “But…I knew I needed to eat, that I might not even make it home otherwise, and I realized I didn’t really have any other choice, so…I went back. Teuchi actually looked…<em>relieved</em> when he saw me. He said, ‘Oh, good! I was hoping you’d come back!’ and set a giant bowl of ramen just like this in front of me.”</p><p>He laughs slightly, but it’s obvious there are still some painful memories attached to what he says next. “It smelled and looked so <em>good</em>, and I wanted to eat so <em>badly</em>, but…I was <em>terrified</em>. I couldn’t trust that it hadn’t been poisoned, after all, since that had happened a few times before.” Hearing sharp gasps, he snaps up to look at his friends. <em>Shit</em>. He forgot they didn’t know. Shikamaru’s tense and looks like he’s going to break his bowl with how hard he’s clutching it, while Choji’s chalk pale and looks like he might lose the dinner he just ate. He kicks himself. Hoping to fix it, he waves his good hand calmingly and then pats his stomach. “Oh, d-don’t worry, though! The Nine Tails always sent his chakra through me to purge it, so I was fine! I mean, yeah, it felt like being burned from the inside out, but still! I was never in any real danger, I promise!” Of course, without the Nine Tails sealed inside him, he wouldn’t have been poisoned in the first place, but that’s not exactly the Nine Tails’ fault either, in his opinion.</p><p>“A-anyway—Teuchi must have seen how scared I was because he reached over and tested the broth for me to show me it was okay. Ayame helped dry me off with a few towels, too!” He laughs, a more genuine sound this time. Shikamaru and Choji are glad to hear it. “I ended up eating three bowls before the rain slowed down enough for me to go home, and Teuchi told me to come back whenever I wanted, money or not!”</p><p>His smile is reminiscent and a little sad, but softer and stronger, too. Better for it. "So that's why I love Ichiraku ramen so much. It saved me. <em>They</em> did. It was…” he melts a little more, “…the first time anyone had ever really been kind to me, you know? I learned that day that not <em>everyone</em> in the village hated me or was out to get me.” He grins toothily. “And over the years, Ichiraku’s has gotten even more special for a lot more reasons, too!"</p><p>Shikamaru and Choji are rather…speechless after all that. They just sit there and reflect while Naruto finally eats his last little fish cake. Finally, Shikamaru breaks the silence with a pensive hum, eyes moving to the once delicately, meticulously packed box. His voice is soft and low. “So that’s the reason, huh?” He always did wonder…</p><p>Naruto nods enthusiastically. “Mm hmm! Ichiraku’s is mine for life!”</p><p>His friends quirk twin brows. His…? Of course, given a moment, it hits them. Of <em>course</em>.</p><p>Anything that touches his heart, a person who’s kind, someone or something that’s significant to him in any way at all…he claims it as his, and he <em>won’t</em> let it go without the fight of his life. That must be a big part of why this whole thing with Sasuke is so hard on him…</p><p>They’re brought out of their thoughts when they catch Naruto looking between them and chuckling. “What are you laughing about?” Shikamaru asks. His fond tone and even fonder smirk don’t escape Choji.</p><p>“I was just thinking.” Once again, he points at them both. “You two are the kindest people in the Hidden Leaf, so of <em>course</em> it makes sense that you’d find each other and be friends!”</p><p>The two in question blush something fierce. Where in the hell did that come from? All the same, after a moment, Shikamaru’s grin widens, and he laughs himself, exasperatedly doting. He holds up his own set of fingers. “You mean <em>three</em>.”</p><p>The blond cocks his head, raises an eyebrow of his own. A small “Hmm?” leaves him.</p><p>“<em>You</em>, <em>too</em>, Naruto.”</p><p>Naruto blushes to his ears.</p>
<hr/><p>Choji doesn’t stay too much longer after that. After delivering Yoshino’s message to Shikamaru (which earned him a sigh, a tired “Yeah, yeah, mom…” in response, and a thanks), he offers to take the bowls back to Ichiraku on his way home. Promising he’ll be by to visit again soon, he heads out into the evening.</p><p>Naruto yawns, which makes Shikamaru snicker. “Can’t sleep yet.” He waves the now-familiar pills at him. “You know the rules. Gotta take your sleeping meds first. Lady Tsunade’ll have my head if I don’t make sure you take them.”</p><p>“You’re damn right I will, Nara!”</p><p>Shikamaru jumps and looks over, sighing in relief when he sees who it is. He nods politely. “Evening, Lady Tsunade.”</p><p>Naruto, as expected, gasps and lights up when he sees her in the doorway. “Granny Tsunade! You’re back!” He yawns again. “How are you…?”</p><p>Softening as she walks over to him, she ruffles his hair gently, making him beam and laugh while he leans up into it. It only makes her soften more. “Just fine, Naruto. Thank you.” Purposefully moving to the side of the bed opposite Shikamaru, she sits down. “How are you feeling?”</p><p>Naruto just grins and gives a thumbs up. “Great!” She raises an eyebrow, and he has the grace to look sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck. “I-I mean, don’t get me wrong, it’s boring sometimes, and you know how I feel about being cooped up,” she smirks a bit; that’s what she thought – his shining eyes and smile come back twofold, “but Shikamaru and the others have been <em>amazing</em>!” He chuckles delightedly. “I’m so lucky to have such incredible friends!”</p><p>Tsunade and Shikamaru can’t help but melt. Honestly… They all feel the exact same way about him. <em>So</em> much.</p><p>The Hokage just smiles. “Good. I’m glad to hear it.” A heartbeat, and then her expression and voice gentle. “How about here?” She pokes his heart. “As far as I know, Iruka, Sakura, Kakashi, Choji, and Ino, through Sakura, know about your decision now. Seeing as you’ve started making your rounds, so to speak, I’m guessing that means you haven’t changed your mind.”</p><p>Not that she wants him to. <em>Hell</em>, no. Of course she’d rather have Sasuke taken care of—he’s a loose cannon who attacked the Kage Summit and has it out for the Leaf, someone <em>Gaara</em> considers to be off his rocker, for God’s sake—but she can put literally anyone else on his tail. Preferably someone <em>without</em> a personal stake in the situation.</p><p>Naruto… Like he said himself, he deserves <em>better</em>, damn it. And if she can, if he’ll let her, she’d like to give it to him.</p><p>So, she’s relieved as all hell when he shakes his head with a little smile. Heartbroken as it might be, it’s resigned, <em>resolved</em>, too. “No, I haven’t. You don’t have to worry about that, Granny, I promise. I wouldn’t tell anyone else, put them through that, if I wasn’t absolutely sure. Kakashi-sensei and Sakura most of all.”</p><p>Some of the tension in her shoulders loosens at that, and Tsunade’s smile warms. Leaning forward, steadying him with fingers gently curled at his chin, she kisses his forehead before resting hers there. “I’m so proud of you, Naruto.”</p><p>She knows she told him that the other day, but…it bears repeating.</p><p>Naruto softens and closes his eyes happily, reaching up to hold the hand at his chin. “Thanks, Granny.”</p><p>After another moment, they separate, and Tsunade announces, suddenly more upbeat, “And on that note, Naruto, I came because I have some good news for you!”</p><p>Hope reflexively flares in Naruto’s chest, first instinct being maybe they found Sasuke. But he squashes that like a bug. He’s not supposed to care anymore, remember? He shakes his head quickly, but neither Tsunade nor Shikamaru miss the truth. “R-really? What is it?”</p><p>Her smile warms. “Based on what I saw in my exam the other day and your vitals this morning, we should be able to remove your binding-cast. That means you’ll be able to use your right arm again!”</p><p>He gasps and beams, thrilled. “Really? You mean it?” He throws his good arm in the air. “Woohoo! <em>Finally</em>! Thanks, Granny!”</p><p>Tsunade is beaming as well by now, laughing. She can’t help it. Not only is his enthusiasm contagious, but if he knew <em>why</em> he was getting it off…! She tries to bite her lip to keep from smiling <em>too</em> much, lest she make them suspicious, but sadly, she forgets who she’s with.</p><p>Naruto scrutinizes her while she double-checks his arm’s progress with her medical ninjutsu. “You’re hiding something, aren’t you, Granny?” he accuses playfully. Excitement trills in his chest.</p><p>She makes a point of not looking at him while she works to school her expression. She doesn’t entirely succeed, but sue her. Despite her initial reservations all those years ago, it’s been proven time and again that she <em>loves</em> this boy, and she wants nothing more than to see him happy.  “Oh, really? And what makes you say that?”</p><p>Naruto just grins. “Nothing, really!” A moment later, Tsunade blinks when he pokes her forehead gently, making her look up at him. “I just know you too well!”</p><p>Tsunade can only stare up at that blinding smile. She remembers a white-haired old fool who used to say the same thing. For a moment, she swears she sees his face in place of Naruto’s, hears his voice, too, years younger, back when they were just dumb kids with no clue what the future held in store for them. Her gaze falls, and she closes her eyes to take a deep, slightly tremulous breath. No tears, not now. She smiles some, maybe a bit sadly, though she does her best to hide that part. “I suppose that’s true…”</p><p>“<em>Ha</em>! See?”</p><p>Looking back at him, Tsunade smirks. “I’m afraid I can’t tell you what it <em>is</em>,” Naruto deflates with a whine of her nickname while Shikamaru is just as bummed, and she raises an eyebrow, “but I <em>can</em> tell you you’ll like it. Very much, if I do say so myself.” She winks. “So be patient and take your medicine so you sleep well tonight. You’ll need it.”</p><p>True to her word, Tsunade deems his arm healed enough to do without the binding-cast, so she works on taking it off while catching up on the last two days. She’s relieved and happy, encouraged and encouraging both, to hear how well Sai and Choji both took Naruto’s decision. Not that she’s really surprised. The Konoha 11 have always rallied behind Naruto far more than they ever have Sasuke, especially after the first time Sasuke pulled something like this with Naruto.</p><p>“Sai told us he saw you and Sakura training really early this morning. He said you seemed…” Naruto shudders a bit in sympathy for Sakura, having been on the receiving end of Tsunade’s temper many times, “…p-pretty pissed.” His expression shifts to be more earnest, eyes alight with righteous fire. “I know Sakura can handle herself, but…she <em>did</em> come out okay, right? You weren’t <em>too</em> hard on her, were you? She really did apologize for breaking my nose, brought me flowers and everything, and she promised she’ll make it up to me. I believe her. Shikamaru and Kakashi-sensei do, too. So…everything’s okay now, right?” He swallows. “You’re not still mad?”</p><p>He waits on bated breath for her answer, and after a moment or two of appraising him, she sighs. Honestly… “At this point, I’m pretty sure it might <em>actually</em> kill you to worry about yourself for a change…”</p><p>Shikamaru snorts. “You’ve got that right.”</p><p>Naruto pouts. “Hey, whose side are you on?!”</p><p>The older boy raises an eyebrow with a smirk and nudges his knee. “Whichever side keeps you alive, dumbass.”</p><p>It’s Tsunade’s turn to snort. “Yes, well…” She begins expertly examining his now-free arm. “To answer your question, Naruto, no, I’m not still angry with her. I berated and pushed her to her limits for almost a full day, and that should be punishment enough. Honestly, she took it like a champ.” She raises a soft eyebrow at Naruto. “She must really be sorry for what she did.” She and Shikamaru can’t help but think, <em>She’d better be</em>. “But you don’t have to worry about her. She’s probably bruised and exhausted, but otherwise, she’s just fine. She’s my student, after all.” Naruto nods, understanding that, of course, but he’s still relieved.</p><p>Pausing her work for a moment, she cups his cheek, and his breath catches at the undoubtedly loving way she’s looking at him. “I’m sorry for the way she reacted. I know it was hard enough for you to come to that decision, let alone tell her and Kakashi. She should have been more mature about it…” she sighs a bit wearily, resting her chin in her hand, “…but then again, maybe I’m not the best to talk about maturity.” She bites her lip before continuing, looking away. “When Orochimaru deserted the village and Jiraiya insisted on going after him…I turned my back on everything I’d ever known to become a gambling loser…” She chuckles, though it’s a bit sardonic. “I did much worse than punch Jiraiya in the face, emotionally and physically, though he probably didn’t see it that way. So, I guess, in the grand scheme of things, she’s <em>still</em> doing better than me...”</p><p>She points at Naruto sternly, a sharp, yet still soft edge to her now. “But that <em>doesn’t</em> make what she did to you okay. No matter her reasons, she broke a cardinal rule of being a medical ninja, and she knows now that there will be <em>dire</em> consequences if she <em>ever</em> does it again.” Namely, she will no longer be able to call herself Tsunade’s student. But that’s for master and student and no one else. Besides, now that she’s laid down that law, she has faith she’ll <em>never</em> have to make good on it. Not with her, anyway. “To be a shinobi, you need more than strength and jutsu. You must acquire the judgment to make the right decisions. You must become smarter.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, breath hitching in his throat. That’s—!</p><p>“Jiraiya’s words, yes.” Tsunade is quieter now than she was a second ago, and Naruto clams up so he can listen. “He said them to you when you still wanted to go after Sasuke after he nearly killed you the first time, isn’t that right?” Naruto’s shocked and confused about how she knows that, but nods anyway. Then again, it would make sense that she and Pervy Sage talked before he took Naruto with him. “They’re what helped you come to your decision.” That last part isn’t a question, and Naruto nods again. Seems <em>she</em> knows <em>him</em> too well, too. “It’s time Sakura learned them, too, learned to internalize them like you have.”</p><p>“Maybe, even if it came about in a way we didn’t expect, this <em>is</em> her way,” Shikamaru offers.</p><p>Lady Tsunade hums, a soft smile coming. “I was just thinking the same thing.”</p><p>Naruto nods, grinning brightly. “Yeah!”</p><p>Chuckling, Tsunade finally rests Naruto’s free arm at his side. “All right, there we go. Now try moving it around. Let’s see how it feels.”</p><p>Naruto does, experimentally lifting it a foot or so off the bed at first, then raising it all the way up and swinging it back and forth in a big wave before moving it forward and backward, then in a circle like he’s rotating his shoulder. He tries a few more things, too, just to cover all the bases, and he beams Tsunade’s way first thing. “It feels great, Granny! Good as new!” Putting both of his hands together, mostly just because he finally can, he bows his head low. “Thank you so much! You’re the best!”</p><p>The remaining tension leaves Tsunade’s shoulders, and she softens, a tender smile painting her lips. “Of course. I’m so glad.”</p><p>Shikamaru grins widely. “All right! One more step toward recovery!” He reaches over for a high-five. “I’m happy for you, Naruto!”</p><p>Naruto laughs happily, knowing exactly what he’s doing and appreciating it. He returns the high-five with his now-free hand. “Thanks, Shikamaru!”</p>
<hr/><p>Tsunade doesn’t stay much longer, needing sleep after a long day as Hokage. Administering his sleeping meds before she goes and promising to visit soon, she winks on her way out the door. “Have fun tomorrow!”</p><p>The boys look at each other and shrug, still not sure what that means, but they figure they’ll find out soon enough. Naruto yawns as Shikamaru settles back in his chair to get comfortable for the night, and his realization with Choji earlier filters back to the forefront of the blond’s mind. Seeing Shikamaru yawn himself, he figures now’s as good a time as any. “You’re gonna be really sore if you keep sleeping like that.” Shikamaru smirks a bit and opens his mouth to say he’s open to suggestions when Naruto pats the space beside him. “Come up here with me, if ya want.”</p><p>Shikamaru instantly flushes despite himself, glancing from Naruto to the bed and back. He shakes his head. “N-no way. You’re still recovering. What if I kick you and just make it worse or something?”</p><p>“What if I have another nightmare and smack you in the face?” Naruto counters. Shikamaru blinks. “See? We both have con—” he’s cut off by a yawn, longer than before, “—concerns… But knowing you, you’ll sense me and <em>won’t</em> kick, and knowing me, having you here will comfort me enough that I won’t have any nightmares.” He shrugs. “There. Problems solved.”</p><p>He yawns again, and Shikamaru knows that means he won’t be awake much longer. Reluctant as he is to admit it, Naruto makes some good points…and it <em>would</em> be nice to wake up without his back and neck killing him for once (not that he’d ever tell Naruto that, ‘cause then he’d just worry)...</p><p>Finally, he looks back at Naruto and sighs a bit, smiling softly. “All right, knucklehead, make some room.”</p><p>Brightening, Naruto pulls back the covers and scoots over, letting Shikamaru slip in beside him before pulling them back over. Even with both of them in the bed, there’s still plenty of room to move if they need it. A perk of both of them being small, Shikamaru figures. That said, it only occurs to him now that he’s never slept in a bed with someone else before. He feels like he should be nervous or…embarrassed, maybe? And he is, a tiny bit, but…nowhere near as much as he thought he’d be. Seriously, it’s barely anything.</p><p>Given a moment, he laughs at himself. He really shouldn’t be so surprised. This is <em>Naruto</em>, after all. Besides his teammates and parents, there’s no one else he feels more at ease with. So, of course even something as supposedly intimate as sharing a bed wouldn’t feel weird with him. Honestly… He really is something special. He has no idea how much.</p><p>Seeing his friend is about to lose his battle with sleep for real, Shikamaru shifts a little closer and threads their fingers together. If he’s going to do this, he wants to do everything he can to keep the nightmares at bay and make Naruto feel as adored as he deserves.</p><p>Naruto smiles over at him sleepily. “Night, Shikamaru… Thanks…for staying…”</p><p>Shikamaru blinks at that, once again getting the feeling he means more than just the last few days, but before he can ask, Naruto’s light snores fill the room. The brunet softens. Remembering that Naruto and Choji had a lot of time to themselves today, Shikamaru’s guessing that means his little secret is out.</p><p>Chuckling, Shikamaru makes sure to pull the blankets up to his charge’s neck and squeeze his hand. He settles in to watch over him while he sleeps. “No need to thank me. Sweet dreams, Naruto…”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Since some people were asking what the "How to Train Your Dragon" reference was in the last chapter, figured I'd tell you now! It was the "We're ninjas. It's an occupational hazard" that Naruto says to cheer Choji up and make him laugh, mirroring Hiccup saying it to Stoick (obviously replacing 'ninjas' with 'Vikings') in HTTYD movie 1. ;)</p><p>Also, this chapter has a reference, too! The chapter title references "Fruits Basket" reboot's season 2, episode 2, which is titled "Eat Somen with Your Friends!" (Also Shigure Sohma's line(s) from the ep, where the title comes from, which is "Sure, you'll still get anxious sometimes, but...when that happens? Just take a little break! Read a book, watch some TV, and...if all else fails, eat somen with your friends!")</p><p>Also-also, the little story about Ichiraku Naruto tells was inspired by the child!Naruto and Teuchi interaction in <i>Shippuden</i> ending 34, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pU6dj4e9zl0">"Niji no Sora"</a>. I embellished on it a bit, adding the bullies and the previous poisonings! ;D</p><p>Next is the <i>long</i>-awaited (mostly by me, lol) GAARA CHAPTER, which I'm <i>so excited</i> to show you guys! (Warning: it might be a long one, been planning it since I started this fic, basically, lol!)</p><p>Thanks so much for reading, as always!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0009"><h2>9. Heatwave</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Naruto's mysterious surprise arrives by sandstorm. (Part 1)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Hello, everyone! I am <i>so sorry</i> this chapter is this ridiculously late (not that I really had a timeframe or schedule, but still)! The day after I finished the last chapter and was ready to jump on this one, I ended up coming down with a really bad headcold that lasted for weeks! Last week was the first week I finally felt well enough to write, so I banged this out as soon as I could (for your sake and because I was <i>dying</i> to write the entire time, and it killed me to wait that long, lol)!</p><p>This is another chapter I had to split into two parts because, without even stitching all my ideas together, it was already over 9k, and I didn't want to subject you poor readers (let alone myself, lol) to an 11k+ chapter, so I took mercy on all of us and cut it! lol. On the bright side, that means the next chapter already has a good chunk written! Yay! lol.</p><p>Not sure if anyone noticed, but I <i>meticulously</i> planned events in the previous chapters so <i>three days</i> (how long it takes to get from Hidden Sand to Hidden Leaf and vice versa) would pass, and since today's Day 4, <i>bam</i>! Sand sibs have arrived! &gt;:D</p><p>For the sake of a funny, cute scene in this fic, let's pretend that Naruto's never seen Kankuro without his puppet makeup, okay? Okay! Good!</p><p><i>Two sections of this chapter were inspired by two different readers' reviews on AO3!</i> <b>ThePageisTorn on AO3</b> helped inspire/reinforce my own ideas for the Shikamaru section! - "It almost seems that while genuine, Shikamaru's friendship and protective nature is perhaps his own guilt of not being there for Naruto when they were younger and how Naruto had to turn to a toxic friendship he has with Sasuke in order to feel less of that loneliness he felt throughout his life." (Thanks so much! Was a lot of fun to write!)</p><p><b>riversmoon416 on AO3</b> inspired the section about Naruto apologizing to Gaara for telling him he still chose Sasuke after the Five Kage Summit (like I said, it's been forever since I've seen most of Naruto, so some details have been forgotten, lol). (Thanks so much for reminding me, haha! Was fun to delve into the feels!) (On a somewhat related note, please note that Sakura 'confessing' to Naruto in that arc never happened in this AU 'cause, frankly, that was some gross, manipulative <i>bullshit</i>, Kishimoto!)</p><p>Hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Early the next morning, Shikamaru wakes leisurely, a lot more than he normally would. It takes him a few extra seconds to register that he’s lying comfortably in a bed and not sore from hunching over in a chair, and he only remembers why when he glances down to see Naruto latched on to his arm, nuzzled in like it’s a teddy bear or something. He can’t help but breathe a laugh at that, softening as he gently ruffles his hair.  </p><p>Turns out, the kid was right. He didn’t have any nightmares, and Shikamaru doesn’t remember moving much at all in his sleep. Just getting closer to Naruto, if anything. Actually, if he’s right about how Naruto slept, they both slept better than they have in a long time. It was…really nice.</p><p>It’s <em>still</em> really nice.</p><p>Letting his head fall back on the pillow again, he curls around Naruto, partly burying his face in blond hair and drawing him closer with an arm around his shoulders. Naruto gives a quiet, happy growl, more of a purr, really, in response (the Nine Tails’ influence?) and presses his face decisively into his chest. Shikamaru can’t help the beam that instantly spreads across his face, the small laugh that vibrates through his chest.</p><p>Honestly, Shikamaru’s feeling a little spoiled.</p><p>He has the sun on his face, he’s warm, comfortable, feels more than a little adored (just what he expected from Naruto, to be honest), and Naruto is alive and well (mostly, getting there) at his side. He feels…so content like this, more than he ever thought he could.</p><p>He’s not just talking about sleeping beside Naruto either. <em>Being</em> beside him, <em>staying</em> beside him… It’s something he’s been thinking about for a long time now. Gentle fingers absently card through Naruto’s hair as his tired mind wanders. This kid…</p><p>Ever since they were kids, being around Naruto has made him <em>happy</em>. He’s never really been able to explain why, not to the extent he wishes he could, but he’s always felt drawn to him, always wanted to be nearby, watch over him and protect him if he could. Not that Naruto made it easy. He could be loud and obnoxious and annoying (mostly for the attention, Sihkamaru suspected then and knows for sure now), and he wondered why the blond always pulled all those pranks when it only made the adults hate him more. He understood the part about getting the villagers’ attention and acknowledgement, but now that he’s older, he thinks he understands even more intimately than the rest of their friends.</p><p>He did it because…at least the pranks gave them a <em>reason</em> to hate him. So he could, at the very least, put a <em>name</em> to it. Because without that, being hated for seemingly no reason at all besides merely <em>existing</em>… Honestly, it’s a miracle and a testament to just how golden-hearted Naruto really is that the kid <em>didn’t</em> go rogue and kill them all. They would have deserved it, no question. Shikamaru would have even gone so far as to call it poetic justice, even if he’d never say such a potentially treasonous thing out loud.</p><p>As for the rest of their time growing up, it’s not like he and Naruto were ever buddies or anything, not like he and Choji at least, but…he still always wanted to do what he could for the blond when the opportunity arose. He mostly worked in the shadows – telling Iruka-sensei nine-year-old Naruto was tricked into going into the back hills where he was almost killed by those enemy ninja, scaring that shopkeeper who shoved and threw a festival mask at an innocent Naruto’s face so he bled into never trying anything like that again, watching out for Naruto back when Gaara was a total nutjob out for blood – but still…</p><p>To this day, he wishes he could have done more. He wishes he could have known the truth about why the rest of the village hated Naruto so much, about just how bullied and lonely and miserable he’d been so he could have helped—done something, <em>anything</em>, to make it better. Been a better friend, <em>more</em> of one. When he thinks back on it now, all he wants to do is shake his younger self by the shoulders and tell him, “You’re a genius, aren’t you?! Open your damn eyes!”</p><p>It hurts, experience telling him worse than a knife twisting in his gut…and Shikamaru is man enough to admit that that guilt and anger at himself are part of what drives him to be here for Naruto now. But he also knows that, from talking with the others over the years, that’s true for <em>all</em> of the Konoha 11. None of them <em>really </em>knew what was up with Naruto growing up, just that almost all of their parents and the rest of the village didn’t like him and told them to stay away, too. But once they were old enough to make their <em>own</em> decisions and see that Naruto <em>wasn’t</em> the demon they made him out to be, they chose to be with him and shower him with the affection and love he's <em>always </em>deserved, that they wish now they could have always given him.</p><p>And honestly? Shikamaru is convinced, with as perceptive and people-smart as Naruto is, Naruto <em>knows</em> that, just doesn't care. He doesn't blame them for any of it. He understands completely. After all, it’s not like they could just go against their parents like that without getting in serious trouble, and he’d never want that for them. Plus, as far as he’s seen, kids tend to believe what their parents tell them, and if their parents painted him in a bad light and never let them get close, how were they supposed to know or learn they were wrong?</p><p>In the end, he knows they’re his friends not because they want to absolve themselves of their guilt, but because they’ve gotten to know and love him for <em>him</em>, and that’s everything he’s ever wanted. He’ll never question what they have because, in his mind, there’s no rhyme or reason to, and he’s not the kind to overthink things like that.</p><p>He might have been alone before, but now he’s not. He has people he loves who love him, who he’d fight and even die to protect. That’s enough for him.</p><p>For him, their love will <em>always</em> be enough. So much more than.</p><p>And really, after all he and Naruto have been through together, after everything in the past two weeks especially, everything Naruto’s struggling with right now? It’s just solidified Shikamaru’s  want to stay by his side. Except…it’s more than that. It’s been a yearning, a driving force for him. Almost a need, but not quite.</p><p>It’s…his <em>dream</em>.</p><p>Yeah, that’s it. It’s perfect.</p><p>With that name in mind, Shikamaru closes his eyes to let himself fall back to sleep for now, but not before reaching down to rest his hand over Naruto’s again, the other still buried in his hair.</p><p>He’ll hold this dream of his close until it becomes reality. Just watch him.</p>
<hr/><p>Naruto wakes up earlier today, around 9 AM, and Shikamaru hopes that’s a small sign that the meds don’t have to work as hard, that he’s slowly getting better. He’s just finished his breakfast when there’s a soft knock on the door. They look at each other, neither of them expecting anyone, of course, but they just shrug. Really, it could be any of their friends. With a knock like that, maybe it’s Choji again. “Come in!” Naruto calls.</p><p>They never could have guessed who would step through the door.</p><p>Naruto can’t believe his eyes, squinting skeptically. “Shikamaru, are the pain meds messing with my head…” he points, “…or is that <em>Gaara</em> in front of me?”</p><p>Shikamaru, wide-eyed and speechless, hedges a few extra blinks and a pinch for good measure before replying, “Nope, that’s the Kazekage, all right.” Remembering himself in the next moment, he bows his head low. “G-good morning, Lord Kazekage.”</p><p>Gaara, for his part, just patiently crosses the room with a small, gentle smile. He looks Shikamaru’s way when he gets to him and nods in polite greeting. “Good morning, Shikamaru. I appreciate the courtesy, but there’s no need for formalities here. Just ‘Gaara’ is fine.” Shikamaru’s eyes widen, knowing the weight of such a request, but he nods regardless. Glancing over at Naruto and then back, Gaara softens. <em>Thank you for looking after him</em>, he silently says, and Shikamaru blinks before nodding again, a tiny smile of his own coming. Guess he doesn’t have to wonder how much Lady Tsunade’s told him, then.</p><p>Naruto is further convinced that Gaara’s really here by the second, brightening more and more. He closes one eye at the gentle, teasing way Gaara’s sand caresses his cheek (one of the redhead’s seldom known, quirkier ways of showing affection).</p><p>That’s all it takes.</p><p>He <em>lights up</em> instantly, bursting from the inside out like a firework.</p><p>“<em>Gaara</em>!”</p><p>Shikamaru blinks. He thinks this might be the happiest he's seen Naruto since he woke up and came to his decision. Naruto waves Gaara closer excitedly and doesn’t hesitate to hug him as tightly as he can the second he’s close enough. “I can’t believe you’re really here! I’m so happy to see you!”</p><p>Gaara isn’t surprised in the least by the affection. He hugs him back slowly, at his own pace, knowing his friend will understand, a small smile and laugh escaping him. Besides his siblings, Naruto is the only one he allows to hug him like this. “It’s good to see you, too, Naruto.” Given another moment, he relaxes further into the embrace, holding him a little tighter. “I’m so glad you’re all right.” He presses his face into his shoulder just enough for the pressure to register, maybe a touch more, which is saying a lot for him. “I was worried.”</p><p>Naruto breathes a laugh and softens, curling a light fist in Gaara’s clothes. “I’m really sorry I worried you. I never meant to scare anyone, especially you.” He can feel a lump forming in his throat, but he swallows it as best he can. He’s just so touched and feels so blessed to have such wonderful people in his life. “I’m so lucky to have such amazing friends looking out for me.” He laughs a little more, a tiny, happy sob at the start of his next words. “I-I still can’t believe you came all the way here from the Hidden Sand just to see me. Y-you really didn’t have to, but…” he nuzzles in just the slightest bit, not wanting to overstep anything, “…you really are the best, you know that?”</p><p>Gaara chuckles, smile growing. “You, too, Naruto.”</p><p>A comfortable silence settles for a few long moments as they just hold each other. Naruto doesn’t want to let go yet, and if Gaara’s being honest, neither does he. He’s enjoying the physical affection quite a lot, but only because it’s Naruto. If it were anyone else, there’s no way he’d be so at ease. Besides, just a few days ago, he didn’t know if he’d ever get the chance to hug his friend again. In light of that, any opportunity he gets, he’ll take gladly.</p><p>Shikamaru just watches quietly. He’s pretty sure they’ve basically forgotten he’s here, but he doesn’t mind. Honestly, he’s not the least bit surprised. Their bond is something else, something Naruto will never have with anyone else. Jinchuuriki have a capacity for love and hate unlike anything Shikamaru’s ever seen, and he’ll always be grateful that Naruto was able to turn Gaara toward the former, if only because their friendship has turned into such a sanctuary for them both. He’s just glad they’re happy, that they’re enjoying themselves. If anyone’s earned a little happiness, a little reprieve, it’s the two of them. No question.</p><p>Eventually, Gaara is the one to pull away. It’s probably for the best. Naruto would hug him all day if he could, any of his friends. Hell, he’d fall asleep like that no problem. Not that that would be the best idea, especially if Gaara has to leave for Kazekage business. That thought branching out to a similar concnern in his mind, Naruto tilts his head. “Hey, you’re not gonna get in trouble ‘cause of me, are you? I mean, you are the Kazekage now. I’m sure you can’t just leave the village whenever you want.” He winces. “Were your Council guys mad? They can be scary when they wanna be…” Nowhere near as scary as Granny Tsunade, but still…</p><p>The redhead shakes his head, a gentle smile on his face. “I’ll be fine, don’t worry. As you said, I’m the Kazekage,” he smirks some, playful and warm, “so even <em>if</em> the Council argued, I’d still be here. But as it turns out, I got lucky, too. They gave their blessing.”</p><p>Naruto heaves a relieved sigh, hand to his chest, while Gaara settles on the bed at his side. He smiles. “That’s good. I’m really glad to hear that.”</p><p>Gaara nods, agreeing. “By the way, Lady Tsunade told me everything, so I understand why and how you got here. You have nothing to apologize for.” He softens, smile growing. “As usual, it comes down to your strong bonds with the people precious to you. I’m not surprised at all.”</p><p>Naruto blushes, smile turning shy as he looks away. Seriously, his friends give him <em>way</em> too much credit… “T-thanks… That…means a lot,” he looks back over, melting himself, “especially coming from you.”</p><p>Gaara’s eyes widen, heart stuttering in his chest and a blush rising in his cheeks. Naruto… He’s…proud of him, of how he’s grown… Gaara can’t help but grin widely, a lot for him, the biggest Shikamaru thinks he’s ever seen. He’s only a little surprised when he has to swallow back sudden pinpricks of tears. He’s just…so happy…! “<em>Thank you</em>, Naruto…!”</p><p>Naruto, understanding the kind of effect this would have on Gaara, just beams right back, pride and joy in every note. “Any time!”</p><p>Two birds, one black and the other a sand-yellow, suddenly flap noisily past the open window, and it reminds Naruto of something he’s been wondering. “Oh! Hey, Gaara!” He brightens with excited hope. “Are Kankuro and Temari here, too?”</p><p>As if on cue, Temari laughs warmly as she walks inside. “Hello, Naruto. It’s nice to see you, too.”</p><p>Kankuro, ever at her back, enters after her and waves with a smirk as he leans against the far wall. He and Temari had sent Gaara on ahead while they caught up on a few more things with Lady Tsunade. “You sure had us worried, you know that? But I don’t think anyone could beat my little brother’s worrying.” There’s a teasing edge to his voice, smirk widening. “He gets real quiet when he’s doing mental gymnastics, you know.”</p><p>Gaara tries to be indifferent, but there’s the smallest hint of color to his pale cheeks. “Worrying about someone is just another way to show you care.”</p><p>Kankuro breathes a fond little laugh. “You’re not wrong…”</p><p>The puppet master looks back at Naruto to say something else, but the kid’s…staring at him, squinting as if he can’t see him properly. It’s kind of weirding him out. “W-what? What’s up?”</p><p>Naruto rubs the back of his head. “It’s just…uh…” He points at the brunet, head titled some. “Gaara, did you bring someone new with you this time?”</p><p>Shikamaru sighs. He figured as much. “That’s Kankuro, you idiot. He's just not wearing his puppet master makeup."</p><p>Naruto barks a laugh, in denial. “What? <em>No</em>! Kankuro doesn't wear makeup! He's—it just—” Suddenly, he sees the way the 'new' guy's smirking at him, almost wolfishly, like he’s fighting the urge to bust out laughing, and he squeak-deflates with realization before freaking out and pointing. “Oh, crap, it really <em>is</em> him!”</p><p>Gaara and Temari chuckle more politely while Shikamaru facepalms and sputters and Kankuro doubles over, laughing out loud. Naruto defends, pouting, “Well, how was I supposed to know it was makeup? I thought it was just how his face was, like Kiba with his tattoos or something. I didn't want to be rude and assume anything.” Shikamaru hums, dropping his chin into his hand. He’s got a point there. Turning back to Kankuro, Naruto tells him excitedly, “You look really good without it, you know? Like, <em>wow</em>! I had no idea you were hiding a face like that under there! The girls back in your village must go as gaga over you as they do Gaara!”</p><p>Kankuro's eyes widen, and he blushes, turning away to scratch his cheek. “W-well, since this wasn't a diplomatic mission and we had a long journey and early start, I thought I'd just leave it off...” He grins. “Plus, in your defense, I <em>am</em> less recognizable like this. I appreciate the vote of confidence!” He turns to stare pensively out the window. “But really, there's someone I've got my eye on already, so anyone else's affections don't really faze me.”</p><p>Naruto has stars in his eyes. “Wow! So cool!”</p><p>Temari takes that opportunity to come rest a hand on Gaara’s shoulder with a laugh. “You also weren’t wrong to be surprised to see all of us. The truth is, our Gaara has been <em>beside</em> himself with worry ever since we got Lady Tsunade's missive that you nearly died fighting Sasuke Uchiha and things were looking grim.” Truth be told, she and Kankuro were, too, but they hid it as best they could to be strong for Gaara. “So, when we got the new message three days ago that you were awake and going to be all right,” Temari shrugs matter-of-factly, “the Council practically <em>begged</em> him to take a few days off to come see you!” She grins, a loving arm moving around Gaara's shoulders. She's not nearly as much of a stickler for propriety when it’s only them. “So, he gets to relax <em>and</em> visit his favorite person in the world while he's at it! It's a win-win for everybody!”</p><p>Naruto splutters at that last part, blushing like his life depends on it, but Gaara doesn’t seem embarrassed in the slightest. He’s smiling, in fact, even more once he sees Naruto’s blush. It’s true, after all. Shikamaru just shakes his head and softens. These guys, seriously…</p><p>Once Naruto comes down from that high, he rubs the back of his head. He feels guiltier with these three than he has the others who’ve visited so far. “I’m…really sorry you had to come all this way just for me.” Then, realizing how that might sound, he waves his hands in front of him. “<em>Ah</em>—! N-not that I don’t appreciate it! I do, so much! It’s really great to see you!” He beams. “It makes me really happy, I promise!” In the next moment, some of his guilt creeps back in to dilute his smile. “But you ran yourselves ragged for three days just to get here, and I’m sure you didn’t stop to eat or anything before coming to see me. You must be exhausted. Even before all that, too, I made you worry a whole lot. And Gaara, I know we already talked about this and you said it’s fine, but you’re the Kazekage now. You can’t really afford to just drop everything for one person when you have a whole village that needs you.”</p><p>Still, all that aside… Looking at them now, he can’t help but melt as he bows as low as he can. “I know it must have been a lot for you, even if you say it wasn’t, and I really can’t thank you enough for everything. I promise, I’ll do my best to make sure I never scare you like that again.” Lifting his head, he beams for all it’s worth, happy tears clinging to his lashes. “I love you so much!”</p><p>That’s it. Temari can’t wait anymore.</p><p>Before anyone realizes what’s happening, Temari surges forward to wrap Naruto in a firm, yet still gentle hug. The boy is shocked, frozen. She’s…never hugged him before, not even close. But it feels…safe. Warm and almost…motherly, but in a different way than Granny Tsunade’s. Maybe this is what having a big sister feels like. He’s always wondered.</p><p>“It doesn’t matter,” Temari tells him softly, but sternly, tightening her hold on him a bit as she shakes her head. “<em>None</em> of that matters, okay?” Naruto’s eyes widen and his breath leaves his lungs when he hears the barest hint of tears in her voice. Why is she…getting emotional about <em>him</em>…? Kankuro and Gaara watch her closely, surprised and not at once. They know how worried she was about Naruto, no matter how strong she tried to be. “All that matters is you’re <em>alive</em>. You’re safe and in one piece. You’re <em>home</em>, with people who love you and want to take care of you. That’s <em>all</em> that matters, you hear me?”</p><p>One of her hands moves to his hair, fingers start to run through the tiny waves at the nape of his neck, and he can’t help closing his eyes. It just feels so nice… Finally getting over his shock and relaxing into her embrace, he hugs her back carefully. He hesitates before nuzzling into her shoulder a tiny bit, careful not to tread too far. Temari doesn’t seem to mind, though. In fact, he feels her hold him a little closer and smile into his shoulder. She takes a shaky breath and sniffs. “You reckless idiot…”</p><p>Slowly, half-reluctantly pulling back, she cups his cheek, and Naruto can only stare, eyes widening and heart thumping. The gentle look she’s giving him is the same one she fixes Kankuro and Gaara with when she’s worried about them, mostly when she thinks they’re not looking. After another moment, he leans into her warm, soothing touch. This is all new, sure, but certainly not unwelcome. “It’s good to see you smiling again, Naruto.” Her thumb caresses his cheek. “The last time we saw each other, you seemed so sad…”</p><p>For a moment, he’s confused…but then he remembers. After Sasuke crashed the Five Kage Summit, when…he told Gaara he still chose Sasuke… His expression falls, guilt and shame burning his chest. “R-right…” Taking a shallow, partly shaky breath, not for lack of trying to breathe deeper, his smile returns, even if it’s obviously hard on him. He reaches up to place his hand on hers. “I’m—I’m better now, I promise. You don’t have to worry about me, okay?”</p><p>Temari can’t help falling tender. She’s finding herself increasingly powerless in the face of his heart. “Sorry, but that’s not possible.” She winks. “That’s just what big sisters are for, you know?”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, heart hammering in his chest. Is she…is she saying…? Before he can read into it much more, Gaara, who’s been seemingly lost in thought the past minute or so, looks as if he’s remembered something. So Naruto clings to his hope—that Temari really meant it, that he’s somehow, someway, beyond all odds, been accepted more than he could have ever hoped or dreamed, as a <em>little brother</em>—with everything he is.</p><p>Then, he turns to help his friend. “Gaara? What’s up?”</p><p>Gaara glances up and smiles a little at having been noticed (of <em>course</em> he noticed) before wondering how he should start. He’s a little nervous about bringing this up, but from what he’s heard, Naruto would probably end up telling them eventually anyway, so he’s hoping this will make it easier for him.</p><p>“Lady Tsunade told us you came to an important decision regarding Sasuke Uchiha. She wouldn’t tell us what, said it was more your place than hers, but it’s been troubling you.” A heartbeat. “She didn’t tell me that last part. She didn’t have to. I can see it in your face. Your eyes, too.” His expression becomes more earnest, hands balling into light fists, then tighter ones, as he takes in Naruto’s battered body for the hundredth time since coming in. “If there’s anything I can do, Naruto, I want to help.” He looks his friend in the eyes. “Please. Will you tell us what’s going on?”</p><p>Naruto feels like he’s been shoved into a freezing lake—and he knows from experience how jarring that feels. And yet, just like he knows Gaara, it only makes sense that Gaara would know him, too. Shikamaru reaches over to thread the tips of a few of their fingers together, and the warmth of it shocks him out of his stupor. Glancing over at him, he smiles and squeezes in thanks. Then, turning back to the others, he surprises himself by breathing a laugh, a small, sad, but still adoring smile coming through. “I guess this is what Captain Yamato meant when he talked about ‘the mortifying ordeal of being known,’ huh…?”</p>
<hr/><p>Naruto is more than a little surprised at how little he cries this time. He still does, of course, but it’s nothing compared to how much he cried with the others so far. His heart still aches something fierce, and his stomach still churns, but it’s…<em>easier</em> this time. Maybe it’s because they’re not from the village. They don’t know Sasuke nearly as well as the rest, so there’s very little to no chance of them getting angry or feeling betrayed. Whatever the reason, he has to admit, it’s a nice change of pace.</p><p>“I see…” Gaara isn’t judging. Frankly, anyone who dares to hurt Naruto this way, let alone <em>twice</em>, had better <em>pray</em> he doesn’t end up on the receiving end of his sand one day. He’s still kicking himself for letting Sasuke get away at the Summit. If he hadn’t, maybe Naruto wouldn’t have gotten so hurt. He—they, all of them—might not have come so close to losing one of their most precious friends.</p><p>Of course, Sasuke Uchiha has always been a special case, even to him. In some ways, they’re so similar, but so very different, too. Like him, Sasuke was drenched in darkness, both of them finding a purpose in killing (a brother versus anyone Gaara pleased)—but the difference came in the form of sunshine and blue skies and a blinding smile.</p><p><em>Naruto</em> was the difference, the only one who reached out to both of them, offered a hand and that smile, true friendship and everything it came with. A lonely boy with whiskers on his cheeks, who knew Gaara’s pain of being a vessel, a living weapon, of being feared, hated, targeted, and nearly killed several times for something beyond his control. Someone who had been through so much pain, but still found the strength to smile and fight for what he believed in. Someone who taught Gaara that, even if he couldn’t live for himself, if he couldn’t find a reason to keep going just for him, then he could find that reason in his bonds with the people around him, his siblings and any friends he could manage to make. He didn’t have to be <em>alone</em> if didn’t want to be, not anymore. He could have people he cared about who genuinely cared about <em>him</em>, too—if he just <em>let</em> himself.</p><p>Hell, that first bond could be with <em>Naruto</em> if he wanted, if he just came around. He’d take Gaara <em>gladly</em>.</p><p>One of them heeded those words, allowed them to touch his heart and nurture it until he and his bond with Naruto got to the incredible place they are today. The other…burned them with his Amaterasu.</p><p>Still…the similarities between them are…unsettling, to say the least.</p><p>“Naruto…” The blond looks at him, a small “Hmm?” coming. He’d let Gaara gather his thoughts while he answered Temari and Kankuro’s questions about how Sasuke was during their fight. Gaara’s fists tighten again, and Naruto sees he’s almost pursing his lips, too. He’s nervous. He’d wonder why, but he thinks he’s about to find out. “Years ago, when we first fought…I almost killed you, too…” Naruto’s eyes widen. <em>What</em>? Is <em>that</em> what he’s worried about? But he doesn’t interrupt. He knows this is difficult for Gaara, so he’ll let him finish. He just did the same thing for him, so it’s only fair. “Sasuke and I were—are?—so similar… It…disturbs me…” He glares down at white-knuckled fists. “I know I’ve grown since then…but still…”</p><p>Temari’s hands are folded politely in front of her, but her knuckles match his. “Gaara…” Kankuro watches silently, pensively, from his place near the door, frowning as his chest pangs for his little brother.</p><p>But just like always, Naruto is there to stop him in his tracks. Reaching out, he tilts Gaara’s chin up with gentle fingers, blue eyes firm and blazing. “No way. Don’t think that for a second. I know where you’re going with this, and you’re <em>wrong</em>.” Gaara blinks wide eyes. Naruto takes a breath, and he’s calmer as he continues. “You are totally different, Gaara. You may have been lost in the darkness like Sasuke was, but after our one fight, you saw the light. You understood. You <em>wanted</em> to change, and you did. You worked so hard. The proof is in where you are and what you're choosing to do with your time <em>right now</em>.” He grins softly, voice following. “So don't go comparing yourself to him anymore, okay? You're amazing. You have nothing to worry about. I promise you that.”</p><p>Gaara is shocked speechless, lips parted slightly, but he realizes he shouldn't be. This <em>is</em> Naruto, after all. He’s always been wise beyond his years when it counts. It’s almost funny, how much things have changed in just a few short years. He wouldn’t trade how things have turned out for anything. The tension that’d been coiled in his shoulders like a too-taut spring releases at last, and he nods, a like, grateful smile on his face. “Thank you, Naruto. I'll remember that.”</p><p>Naruto nods, happy he could help reassure his friend. “Of course!”</p><p>Temari and Kankuro feel like they can breathe again, their hearts no longer smarting in their chests. He doesn’t talk about it too often, but they know Gaara still feels immense guilt for the way he behaved in the past. Of course, it’s hard to completely blame him when their father was the way he was, but…still. The way he treated them and the lives he so stoically took still weigh on his soul. He does his best to make up for it every day, though, and they’re proud of him. <em>So</em> proud. They always try to reassure him and build him up when he expresses his regret, but they know only so much of it gets through.</p><p>But with Naruto, it’s <em>different</em>. It always has been. They’re not sure why the blond can get through to him so easily, but they attribute it to being a fellow Jinchuuriki and…mostly, they’re convinced it’s simply because of Naruto’s heart. Maybe it should make them angry or jealous, but it doesn’t. On the contrary, they will never, ever be able to thank him enough for always being there to help Gaara in ways they can’t.</p><p>As they look upon their brother’s savior now, they can’t help but love him more. They really don’t deserve him…but they’ll happily thank everything for him regardless. He’s a godsend, truly.</p><p>Naruto, meanwhile, rubs the back of his neck and looks toward the window, other hand fiddling with the sheets. Talking about all this has only reminded him of his own misdeeds… His voice is quiet when he speaks up. “Speaking of…things we regret…” He swallows. “About…what happened after the Summit…”</p><p>Shikamaru raises an eyebrow. He read over the reports from Naruto’s little excursion to the Land of Snow. He knows they met up, but he doesn’t remember there being anything about Naruto and Gaara getting into a disagreement.  Or…was it actually more of a fight? That’d be a first. Well, since becoming friends, that is.</p><p>Naruto can’t make himself look Gaara in the eyes, at least not yet. “After the Summit was interrupted, you came to see me. I...I told you I still chose Sasuke…” He takes a breath before finally forcing himself to meet Gaara’s eyes. His own are open, bright and sad and ashamed. Utterly apologetic. “I’m—I’m <em>sorry</em>.”</p><p>He’s surprised to find his voice raspy all of a sudden, tears stinging his eyes. He’s not sure why the hell he’s getting emotional <em>now</em> and not before. Maybe it’s because he’s realized Gaara was <em>right</em> about Sasuke, and it’s—it reminds him <em>so</em> <em>much</em> of Pervy Sage, and he’d rather die than live with the same regret with his friend that he does his master. He sniffs as a few more tears fall, curling his fists decisively in the sheets. Shikamaru has to blink back his own hints of tears as his heart squeezes. He can read between the lines, and he understands better than anyone.</p><p>“Y-you were right all along, but I…I didn’t want to hear it…” He swallows, eyes piercing. “I-it was the same with Pervy Sage, too, y-you know…? Kakashi-sensei, Granny Tsunade, and s-so many others…” He’s a little surprised at himself when he breathes a tiny laugh, manages a small smile. “I-I guess I just needed a good beating from the jerk himself to wake up. Pretty pathetic, huh…?”</p><p>Gaara only softens, maybe even smirks a little, before reaching forward to use his sleeve to gently wipe away a touch-stunned Naruto’s tears. “I don’t know about that. I seem to remember a misguided boy who needed a similar beating to see that he and his life were worth more than he’d been shown.” Naruto blinks. Seems it’s his turn to be wide-eyed and speechless. Gaara’s cool eyes melt further. “Don’t sell yourself so short, Naruto. You saved me. I owe you everything. Sasuke made his choice. You are not to blame for his failure to listen or any consequences that may result from his ignorance. Don’t confuse the two. All right?”</p><p>Given another moment or two of shock, Naruto softens in turn, even if it’s the tiniest bit sad, too. There’s acceptance there, though, and Naruto looks happier, somehow lighter, as he shamelessly nuzzles into Gaara’s hand, making the redhead blush happily, and Shikamaru appreciates it like nothing else. “You’re right. I…I know that now.” Then, even softer, “<em>Thank you</em>, Gaara.”</p>
<hr/><p>By the time Naruto’s dinner comes hours later, the blond is a little worried. He’s seen Kankuro yawn at least five times in the last few hours, and with the sun starting to set the way it is, Gaara is looking more raccoon-eyed than usual (he says that with love). Temari’s stomach growls embarrassingly loudly when she lays eyes on his food. Geez, these guys…</p><p>“You guys should go get some food and rest for the night,” he suggests suddenly, startling them.</p><p>“He has a point,” Shikamaru backs up. “Seriously, you guys look like you’ll fall over from exhaustion or hunger any minute. Maybe both.”</p><p>The siblings look at each other, a silent conversation passing. Temari and Kankuro come back resigned. “We were in such a hurry, we didn’t even think about breakfast,” the blonde confesses.</p><p>“And we haven’t exactly been getting much sleep lately…” Kankuro supplies.</p><p>Gaara is the only one who doesn’t speak up, eyes never leaving Naruto. He doesn’t want to leave him yet. He’s a little afraid that, if he does, then…—!</p><p>Naruto reaches out to thread his fingers through Gaara’s, a bright smile playing. “What’s that look for, huh? It’s only for the night! Knowing you, you’ll be back first thing in the morning! Besides, you said you’re staying two or three days, right? That’s plenty of time to catch up and have fun!” He shifts their fingers around so his pinkie is firmly wrapped around Gaara’s. “I promise, it’ll be fine! Trust me!”</p><p>Gaara stares for another moment before he relaxes. ‘Trust him,’ huh? Well…he supposes that’s something he can do. It’s always worked out for him in the past, after all. He smiles softly, righting their hands and returning the pinkie promise readily. “I’ll hold you to that, as future Hokage.”</p><p>Naruto chuckles.</p><p>“Fair enough!”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Temari and Kankuro deserve more credit for being sweethearts, damn it! I love them as badasses as much as the next guy, but my favorite scenes of them are when they're being sweet, protective siblings to Gaara and cuties to Naruto (Shikamaru, too)! So I told myself I'd give it to them in these Sand sibs chapters! Hope you liked what you saw of them here 'cause there'll be more in the next one! :D</p><p>The example moments in the first section where Shikamaru looked out for Naruto as a kid (telling Iruka-sensei to go after Naruto and the shopkeeper pushing Naruto and throwing the festival mask at him) are from <i>Shippuden</i> episodes 177-178, which technically are filler and break canon, but they're some of my faves (I'm a sucker for kid!Naruto being bullied and getting some solace, lol), and two moments from that ep (not mentioned-graveyard scene and mentioned-shopkeeper scene) are later made canon, so I figured it was okay to include! lol. Anyway, because it breaks canon (in that Iruka and Kakashi acknowledge and start to care for Naruto way earlier than in canon - in this AU, they still save Naruto, but keep themselves very distanced), I finagled Naruto's age in the ep, added how the mask being thrown at him made him bleed, and also added how Shikamaru scared that jerk shopkeeper later.</p><p>Also, hoping that Shikamaru's reasons for being there for Naruto now are understood? I think so, but I just want to make sure: he's <i>not</i> helping him out of a want to make up for not being there before - like he says in <i>Shippuden</i> episode 383 during the War Arc, he didn't know what Naruto went through back when they were kids, not really, and he hates it, feels guilty and angry at himself, yes, but now that he knows, all he wants is to make sure he never goes through anything like that again. He wants to make sure he never feels <i>alone</i> like that again, and I think that's especially important given what Naruto's going through with letting go of Sasuke now. Hopefully that's clear if it wasn't already before? LMK if I just made it worse. lol. ;D</p><p>Not sure if anyone noticed, but I dropped another Fruits Basket reboot reference in this chapter! lol. Kind of! The last line of Shikamaru's section, where he says he'll make that dream a reality, just watch him, it's referencing Shigure Sohma's lines in s1e10 "It's Valentine's, After All", "I want to give it form and make it mine. I <i>will</i>. ...Just watch. ...I'll make that dream eternal." I could have sworn the line was more like what I wrote, but close enough! lol. (I feel like, while not as wickedly devious as Shigure, Shikamaru has a lot of traits similar to Shigure, like being swift and cunning and always a hundred steps ahead of everyone else, and for this chapter, wanting to make his dream a reality no matter what, so made sense to me to include that line (though in Shikamaru's case, it's much more lighthearted, lol)!)</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0010"><h2>10. Hourglass</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The Sand siblings catch up and share a few surprises with their favorite shadow and ray of sunshine. (Part 2/Sand Sibs conclusion!)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><i>All right</i>! Finally, this chapter is <i>done</i>! I am <i>so excited</i> for and <i>proud</i> of this chapter, you guys! <i>So</i> thrilled to get to share it with you! I actually meant to have it up yesterday, but real life things got in the way, lol, so I waited till today so I could make sure it's up to my usual standard! This is the longest chapter yet! I definitely thought about splitting it, but the second half didn't have enough content to really warrant its own chapter, and it flowed better as one, so hope it's okay that I left it! Really hope you enjoy it as much as I do, but as always, please be honest! Haha!</p><p>I know Gaara technically isn't a Jinchuuriki anymore as of this point in canon, but for the sake of several points in this chapter, let's just pretend that he and the others still basically consider him (an honorary?) one since he's a <i>former</i> Jinchuuriki and still knows how they feel and all that. Okay? Okay! Thanks!</p><p>Special thanks to <b>Malaya on our KidgeonPost Discord</b> for inspiring the section regarding Shikamaru's exhaustion: "I could imagine them saying something about Shika looking more tired than ever or something" (Was really cool and fun to write! Thanks a lot! You're the best!)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>As promised, Gaara, Temari, and Kankuro all return the next morning, right after Naruto’s breakfast.</p><p>This time, Temari leaves Gaara to his own devices with Naruto, instead moving to lean against the opposite wall by Shikamaru. The shadow wielder hadn’t wanted to crowd the two friends, wanted them to have a little more privacy this time, so he’d moved. He’s sure they wouldn’t have minded if he’d stayed, but still. It’s the principle of the thing.</p><p>In all the excitement yesterday, Temari didn’t realize she and Shikamaru never got to talk. She always enjoys her chats with the brunet. She finds him interesting, even if his laziness and reluctance to put in effort confuse and frustrate her sometimes, and she knows he genuinely enjoys her company, too. They’re able to poke fun at each other without it being taken to heart and even, as few times as it’s happened, be vulnerable with each other without being judged.</p><p>It’s nice, having a real friend for once, someone besides her siblings she knows will always be here for her. The fact of the matter is, her brothers and Lord Baki aside, she isn’t terribly close with anyone back home, being the former Kazekage’s daughter and the current Kazekage’s eldest sibling. She thinks a lot of the Sand’s citizens find her too intimidating to get close to, or maybe she’s too guarded and suspicious of them to let them get close. Maybe it’s a complicated combination of the two.</p><p>But that’s exactly why she appreciates Shikamaru so much. He’s never cared about her status and isn’t put off by her brusque nature. Hell, they were enemies at first, but that never mattered to him once it was all squared away. He was only ever interested in getting to know her for <em>her</em>—and then he stayed.</p><p>She’ll <em>always</em> be grateful for that.</p><p>“So, how's my favorite crybaby doing?”</p><p>Shikamaru sighs, smirking. He knew she’d greet him with something like that. “I'm never gonna live that down, am I? Figures. That's the last time I show emotion around <em>you</em>, demon woman of the Sand...”</p><p>She laughs, unfazed by the faux-derisive nickname. She knows he doesn’t actually mind. After all, the warmth in her voice is obvious to anyone who knows her well. Leaning her hip against his chair, she crosses her arms easily over her chest. It’s quiet for a long moment, and then she tells him in a low voice, expression going fond as she watches her baby brother be drawn in by some story Naruto’s telling, “Gaara did, too.” Shikamaru glances over at that, confused and a bit concerned at her soft, worried, but mostly settled tone. “Cried, I mean, when he found out Naruto was going to be okay. I’m sure you can imagine how he must have felt in the days before that, so terrified and at his wit’s end, but helpless and unable to be there for the person he considers his best friend, the one who changed him, the one he owes <em>everything</em>, his <em>life</em>, to…” Her voice warbles, she sniffs, and Shikamaru looks up, surprised and not to see a few tears have sneaked from her eyes. Turning back to give her some privacy, he discreetly hands her a few tissues. “It was…so <em>hard</em>…to see him like that…when we couldn’t do anything either…”</p><p>She wipes at her eyes and smiles over at Naruto almost helplessly. She laughs a bit. “It was hard on us, too…Kankuro and me… No one really knows but Gaara, but after the mission to rescue him six months ago, we…kind of sibling-adopted Naruto.” She chuckles at Shikamaru’s flabbergasted expression and waves her hand. “Not <em>officially</em> or anything.” Her gaze falls back on bright blond hair and bold blue eyes and melts again, voice following. “But…in our hearts, we did. He’s our little brother now, too, so…while maybe we weren’t <em>quite</em> as scared as Gaara was, relatively speaking, at least…it was pretty up there. We hid it as best we could because we wanted to be there for Gaara,” she snorts, “but I’m almost certain he saw straight through us. He’s…learned a lot about reading people, at least those he’s close to, from Naruto…”</p><p>There’s a quiet, thoughtful lull in the story for a few long moments, during which Shikamaru finds himself watching the two younger boys, protective and adoring in one, for <em>both</em> of them, something Shikamaru never thought he’d feel for the redhead—<em>wouldn’t</em>, if it weren’t for Naruto. Honestly, that guy…</p><p>“So, imagine the intense relief and joy that washed over us when we got the news that he was <em>safe</em>.” She sighs in relief, a hand going to her chest as she wipes her eyes again. “When I tell you I thanked every deity that may or may not exist, I mean it. Every one.” She gives a shaky laugh before softening again. “We’d never seen Gaara cry like that. Not from happiness and relief, anyway. It was alarming, at first,” she breathes a laugh at herself, “but then we just hugged him, crying ourselves, and we stayed like that for what must have been at least ten minutes. It was the longest we’d ever seen him cry.” She swallows. “Right after that, Kankuro brought up the idea of coming to see Naruto. Honestly, we didn’t have much of a choice.” She chuckles again, resting her chin in her hand as she watches her baby brother smile and laugh along with Naruto, her own smile growing. “That’s another reason the Council begged Gaara to come here. We all knew that if he didn’t see for himself that Naruto was going to be all right, he wouldn’t have rested or been able to focus on his work.” She shrugs, a happy, warm smile blooming. “So, after taking the necessary precautions and making arrangements, here we are!”</p><p>Shikamaru is quiet for a bit. He remembers when he got the news that Naruto was in surgery, possibly on his deathbed. He’d just gotten back from a long, hard mission, but his intense exhaustion didn’t even register in his mind. He immediately <em>bolted</em> from the Hokage’s office and ran like his life depended on it. He doesn’t remember ever running that fast in his life. The only time that comes close is the day Asuma died. He’d waited outside the operating room doors for hours and hours, Choji joining him the second he could. Everyone else was on extended missions that day, but he knew they’d be here if they could. He’d just have to keep their spirits and hope and belief in Naruto alive himself, take that role on his shoulders. For once, he didn’t mind at all. In fact, he took it <em>gladly</em>.</p><p>Finally, when the doors opened and an exhausted, but relieved-as-hell Tsunade stepped out and told them Naruto would pull through…Shikamaru had cried like a baby. It was just like the last time Naruto and Sasuke fought like this, relief and joy that he’d be okay. His legs were shaking so much that he couldn’t even hold himself up. Choji had held him and let him bawl into his chest, crying right along with him. Honestly, after everything, it was…therapeutic, he supposes.</p><p>A heartbeat, two, and then,</p><p>“I’m glad you came.”</p><p>Temari looks over at him, surprised. The smile he’s wearing might be brighter than she thinks she’s ever seen from him.</p><p>He nods toward their younger brothers. “Gaara is good for him. I haven’t seen Naruto this happy since he first woke up. He was over the <em>moon</em> when he saw it really was him.” He chuckles, glancing up at her. “You are, too. You and Kankuro and good for him, I mean. He wouldn’t have been <em>nearly</em> as happy if you hadn’t come, too, I’m sure.”</p><p>Temari feels that sink in, and then she smiles like the sun – a tame one, not like Naruto’s blinding, soft and warm and brilliant all her own. It falls somehow tenderer in looking back at two of her boys. She’s gathering more and more of them, it seems. “They’re good for <em>each other</em>,” she surmises. “Jinchuuriki are already special, but that's even truer together.”</p><p>At that moment, Naruto and Gaara both burst out laughing as the blond’s story comes to an apparently hilarious close. Temari and Kankuro’s eyes widen, a bright sheen coming over them. They’ve never seen their little brother laugh like this before. He looks happier, more unburdened, than they’ve <em>ever</em> seen him…</p><p>Shikamaru can’t help but melt. <em>Naruto</em>… What a mysterious power he has… “Yeah… You might be onto something there.”</p>
<hr/><p>A few hours of talking later, Temari steps out to ask the nurse who brought Naruto’s lunch something, and in that time, Kankuro takes her place at Shikamaru’s side.</p><p>It’s quiet – Gaara and his siblings all seem to be ones for silence, he’s found – and Shikamaru lets it be. He doesn’t mind. He prefers silence, too. Kankuro will talk when he’s ready, and until then, they have little brothers to watch over.</p><p>Finally, after a few thoughtful minutes,</p><p>“You know, I didn’t know what to think of Naruto at first.”</p><p>Shikamaru glances up at his soft tone, raising an eyebrow. He doesn’t know where this is going, but he has to admit, he’s curious. He’s always been closest to Temari, that much is obvious, but he’s slowly getting closer to Gaara through her and Naruto, so he supposes it makes sense that Kankuro would feel a kind of kinship with him, at least for his siblings’ sake. Shikamaru doesn’t know what it’s like to have siblings, not really, but if he did, he thinks it might feel like this. He’s actually a lot more okay with it than he ever thought he would be.</p><p>“I mean, he was a Jinchuuriki just like Gaara, but he was so <em>different</em>. All sunshine and smiles, determined to rise above the people and powers that be that wanted to stomp him into the ground. He wanted to make Gaara understand everything he’d learned from his pain, what Gaara could learn, too, if he just opened up. I wanted to believe Gaara could be saved – he’s my little brother, after all – but I’d pretty much already accepted there wasn’t a chance in Hell. I thought he was just too far gone. And then,” he chuckles, smirking, “what do you know? Miracle of miracles, it actually <em>worked</em>. Temari, Lord Baki, and I couldn’t believe it. It took us <em>weeks</em> to grasp that any of it was real. Gaara was already starting to change by then, and now…” He looks at the two boys, older and stronger and wiser than he could have ever hoped or dreamed, warm and grateful as anything. “You’d never know he was the same person.”</p><p>After a moment, he chuckles again, something in it rough and fond at once. “And then, years later, Naruto did it again. He saved my little brother when I couldn’t. I don’t know whether that makes me more guilty or angry at myself, but…” he softens, “…mostly, it just makes me indebted to him. More than I was already, I mean. It also…” he melts further, “…just makes me love him even more.”</p><p>Shikamaru follows his soft as hell gaze to Naruto and softens himself at how much fun he and Gaara are having. From his exaggerated hand gestures, he’d guess Naruto’s started another story. “Yeah… Believe me, I get that.”</p><p>“That’s why I was so blown away and worried like hell when we heard the kid was in such dire straits. I didn’t know what Gaara would do if he lost him, but…I didn’t know what <em>I’d</em> do either. We might not know each other that well, and I might never be able to understand him the way Gaara does, but…he’s still my little brother now, too, you know? He’s the best thing that ever happened to our family, to Gaara most of all, and…”</p><p>He glares down at his open palm for a long moment, almost gritting his teeth. “You know, when Gaara confronted Sasuke at the Summit…yeah, they fought, but Gaara was <em>mostly</em> trying to talk him down. He tried to do for Sasuke what Naruto did for him. But everything he said fell on deaf ears, Sasuke looked and sounded half-crazy, exactly like he did with Naruto, the way the kid told us anyway, and it became clear pretty quickly that nothing was going to change his mind. Gaara could see how far past rock bottom he’d fallen, how big a threat he’d pose if he escaped, so…ultimately, Gaara switched to trying to take him out instead.” A heartbeat. “But knowing you, I’m guessing you already knew that.”</p><p>His gaze slides Shikamaru’s way, and he nods. <em>Naturally</em>. Sasuke’s officially been branded a rogue ninja. He’s even in the Bingo Book. As far as ninja law is concerned, he’s fair game. The Leaf has first dibs, of course, but if someone else takes him out, it’s not something to lose sleep over. Honestly, Shikamaru almost wishes someone would, at least to significantly lessen Naruto’s heartache. He’s sure everyone who loves Naruto feels the same way.</p><p>“Gaara cried during their fight, you know. For Naruto’s sake.” Kankuro’s voice is lower, softer, when he speaks up next, and Shikamaru looks over. Not that he’s really surprised – those two are weak as hell for each other, even someone <em>blind</em> would be able to see that – but still. To cry in front of the enemy he’s trying to save… It sounds almost exactly like what went down between Gaara and Naruto years ago. “Seeing Sasuke like that, Gaara knew intimately how much pain it must be causing Naruto…” He clenches his fist until his knuckles crack. “It makes me wish Gaara would have let us help. Maybe Crow could have gotten him or Temari’s fan or trip wires and explosive tags, anything. I just…would have <em>loved</em> a chance to punch his stupid bastard face in.” He huffs a laugh, and Shikamaru does as well. Honestly? He feels the exact same way. If he <em>ever</em> sees Sasuke again…well, let’s just say he’d better <em>pray</em> they’re both already dead.</p><p>Kankuro’s eyes find the two sitting together on the hospital bed again, and the chakra string-knit protectiveness in his expression tells Shikamaru he does <em>not</em> want to be on the receiving end of his wrath. His puppets already kind of weird him out. “<em>Nobody</em> makes my little brothers cry. <em>No one</em>.”</p>
<hr/><p>Temari comes back about half an hour later, an extra little bounce in her step and shine to her smile.</p><p>Shikamaru raises an eyebrow. “What’re you so happy about?”</p><p>Her grin just grows as she reclaims her spot by his side, Kankuro having moved when he heard her coming. “You’ll find out soon enough.”</p><p>He hums at her playful tone, even more curious and not exactly satisfied, but he’ll take her word for it. Taking a moment, he yawns, a long one he does his best to muffle, and when he opens his eyes again, she’s suddenly right in front of him, leaning into his space and scrutinizing him with narrowed eyes. He leans back to put some much-needed space between them, cheeks coloring. “W-what? What is it?”</p><p>She seems to hesitate before answering, though why, he can’t imagine. “You’re looking tired.” He blinks. What? Is <em>that</em> what this is about? But he’s <em>always</em>— “And I don’t mean like your usual. You’re more exhausted than I’ve <em>ever</em> seen you, Shikamaru.” Her voice is well into that concerned timbre she uses on her brothers and Naruto and him, too, if he worries her enough, and her frown matches. Shikamaru swallows. Oh, boy… “Are you <em>sure</em> you’re doing okay?” She makes to glance over at Naruto, but doesn’t turn away from him. He can read her intentions just fine. “You know you can take a day off, right? I’m sure he’ll understand. You know how he is.”</p><p><em>A break</em>. From watching over Naruto.</p><p>Finally understanding, Shikamaru huffs a little laugh and smiles, resigned. He’s long accepted that being surrounded by selfless worrywarts is his lot in life. “Naruto said the same thing when he finally woke up.” A beat. “It’s not as bad as all that. I’m working on it, I promise.”</p><p>That seems to satisfy her some, but for the parts it doesn’t, she’s at least willing to hear him out. She takes her place back at his side without taking her eyes off him. Shikamaru takes a deep breath. This isn’t something he’d normally divulge, having to do with more than just him, but seeing as they’re part of the Naruto Protection Squad (coined by Shino, funnily enough, in one of his mid-mission messages a few days back), he’ll allow it. This once. Plus, if there’s one thing he hates, it’s making his friends worry about him.</p><p>Nodding toward Naruto, Shikamaru keeps his voice low. “Obviously, I didn’t sleep much while he was out, too worried I’d miss something, that we’d actually lose him on my watch. And once he woke up, he had awful nightmares.” He glances her way. “I’m sure you can guess what about.” Temari bites back a curse, clenches her fists. Of course she can. Shikamaru sends her a small, reassuring smile. “Luckily, since Lady Tsunade prescribed him some sleeping meds to help him recover faster until his advanced healing’s up and running again, they’ve been better, and the other night…” his smile turns helpless and a little shy, and the light blush that comes has Temari even more intrigued than before, this time for more personal reasons, “…we found a new sleeping arrangement that seems to be working out for both of us.”</p><p>Temari waits a few extra seconds to see if he’ll elaborate on that last part, but when it becomes clear he won’t, she bites the inside of her cheek to quell her ravenous curiosity. If he wanted to tell her, he would, and if he doesn’t, then it’s not her place to pry. As long as he’s happy and getting <em>some</em> sleep, catching up at least, that’s good enough for her. Who knows? Maybe he’ll tell her somewhere down the line. Hell, maybe Naruto will, just coincidentally, knowing he’s not shy about that kind of thing.</p><p>Breathing in, she sighs silently in relief, then grins his way at last. “That’s good, then.” She nudges his shoulder semi-roughly. “But don’t scare me like that. Take care of yourself, you hear me? I mean it.”</p><p>Shikamaru laughs and holds up his hands. “H-hey, in my defense, there were outside forces at work here.” Softening a moment later, he says, “Thanks for worrying about me. I appreciate it, but I’ll be fine.” His gaze drifts back to Naruto. “As long as he is.”</p><p>Temari watches him closely, looks between them, then just smiles. He’s hopeless as usual, it seems… At least that hasn’t changed. “I'll hold you to that.”</p>
<hr/><p>The clock strikes 3 PM before anyone realizes it’s been that long (time flies when you’re having fun), and Kankuro goes so far as to double-check before pushing off the wall. He raises a hand toward the others.</p><p>“Sorry to bail on the party so soon,” he grins, “but I have a sparring match with a certain weapons mistress, and I know from experience she'll kick my ass even harder if I'm late.” Somehow, he doesn't seem too unhappy about that. If anything, he seems excited. He waves as he walks toward the door, winking over his shoulder at Naruto. “Take care, blue-eyes! Catch ya later!”</p><p>Naruto waves back. “Bye! Say hi to Tenten for me!”</p><p>“Have fun!” Temari sing-songs, unapologetically teasing, and even Gaara is watching his back with what Shikamaru swears is a tiny smirk.</p><p>He hums—if Naruto and Shikamaru didn’t know any better, they’d say he’s embarrassed—and then he’s gone.</p><p>Naruto blinks, confused. “‘Blue-eyes?’” Then, he gasps and brightens, stars in his eyes. “Oh, <em>wow</em>! I just got a nickname, and from <em>Kankuro</em>! That’s so cool!”</p><p>Shikamaru laughs and shakes his head, gaze all too fond. “You and your nicknames, I swear…”</p><p>Naruto just beams all too proudly, pointing at him. “I’ll find one for you, too, Shikamaru! Just you wait!”</p><p><em>Tch!</em> Shikamaru drops his chin into his hand. Honestly? He’s surprised it’s taken this long. “Yeah, yeah.” He smirks. “Just make sure it’s a good one, all right?”</p><p>Naruto laughs. “No promises,” he flashes a peace sign, “but I’ll do my best!”</p><p>Shikamaru groans and casts an exasperated, yet helplessly adoring look at their other friends. “Pray for me.”</p>
<hr/><p>There’s been a change in Shikamaru lately, at least in the last six months, maybe a little more. Even in his letters, he’s been different. Finally getting to see him in person has proven it without a shadow of a doubt. Temari’s not sure most people would even notice something so seemingly subtle, but she’s not just anyone. She’s been wanting to get to the bottom of it for a while, so now that she finally has the opportunity, she doesn’t want to let it go to waste.</p><p>“I see you took my advice.”</p><p>Shikamaru turns to the eldest Sand sibling, raising an eyebrow. “‘Advice?’”</p><p>Temari nods. “Mm hmm. You’ve stopped complaining about what a drag everything is.”</p><p>He looks straight ahead again, not sure how to take how happy she seems to be about that. “Oh, that.” He watches Naruto smile and laugh with Gaara, happier than he’s been in days, maybe months – hell, maybe even years - and something in his face and eyes softens. Her keen eyes catch it immediately. He rests his chin in his hand, a small, amused smile on his face. Maybe he’s surprised at himself, too. “That’s just because…my dream doesn’t happen to be one.”</p><p>A moment more of watching his more-than-content face, and she softens herself. “I’m happy for you, then.”</p><p>A quiet laugh and light, happy sigh of agreement. “Yeah…me, too. Thank you.”</p><p>(It only hits her later:</p><p>Six months ago is when <em>Naruto</em> came home.)</p>
<hr/><p>Kankuro returns around 6 PM. He’s tired and bruised and a little scraped up, but grinning like the cat who caught the canary.</p><p>Naruto immediately brightens at the sight of him. “Hey, Kankuro! Welcome back!” He waves him over, and once he’s close enough, he asks excitedly, “So, how’s Tenten? I haven’t gotten to see her, Neji, Bushy Brows, or Bushier Brows-sensei yet!”</p><p>Taking a seat on Naruto’s other side, Kankuro sits close, arms crossed casually over his chest. His smile widens at Tenten’s name, and Naruto can’t help but notice Temari and Gaara smirking at him again while he pointedly ignores them. “She’s good! She said she’d be by to see you as soon as the rest of Team Gai got back from their extended training mission.” He laughs. “She wanted to come see you herself since she had to return early to get her weapons repaired anyway, but Gai and Lee wouldn’t stop whining, so she told me to tell you, ‘Trust me, it’s safer if I just wait.’”</p><p>Naruto laughs at his imitation of an exasperated Tenten, pointing. “That’s <em>exactly</em> how she sounds!” He snorts. “I didn’t know you were good at impressions!”</p><p>He shrugs. “It can come in handy on missions that require some of my more specialized puppets.” He’s even more pointedly ignoring Temari’s fiercer smirk, also the fact that his palms are sweating. Big sisters can be so <em>nosy</em>, sheesh…</p><p>Naruto just ‘ooh’s, stars in his eyes. “You’re so cool, Kankuro!” He giggles in excitement. “Maybe you can show me next time I come to the Hidden Sand!”</p><p>The older boy beams with pride, a light flush to his cheeks. He rubs the back of his neck with a laugh. “I-I don’t know if it’s as cool as all that, but thanks! I appreciate it!” He nods. “And you bet, no problem! Sounds like a good time!”</p><p>Naruto throws his arms in the air. “<em>Woohoo</em>! All right!” Sobering, he asks, “So Team Bushier Brow-sensei’s on some kind of training mission, huh? I was wondering where they were.” He smiles brightly. “Well, whenever they get back, I can’t wait to see them! Feels like it’s been forever!”</p><p>Kankuro breathes a laugh. Typical Naruto. “Well, from the way Tenten told it, they’re actually already on their way back. Lady Tsunade sent word when you woke up, but it took a day or two to get there, and apparently, they’ve been hauling ass to get back here ever since, but the weather’s been awful off and on, so it’s slowing them down quite a bit. She said they probably won’t take more than two more days, though, and then they’ll be right over!” He chuckles. “She made me <em>promise</em> to reassure you that they’re all rooting for you and wishing you well until they can say it to your face!”</p><p>Naruto is left wide-eyed and maybe a little speechless. They’d…really do that for him? Push themselves that hard? Then again… He looks around at all of them. They did it, too, didn’t they? They ran themselves ragged for three days, barely sleeping or eating much of anything, just so they could see for themselves that he was okay…</p><p>These guys…his <em>friends</em>… He doesn’t deserve them…</p><p>Swallowing the lump of emotion in his throat, he grins brightly. “W-when you see her next, you can tell her they don’t have to worry about me. Shikamaru’s taking the <em>best</em> care of me,” the brunet in question beams proudly, a happy blush springing to his cheeks, “and I’ll be here whenever they get here, no matter when!” Grin turning sheepish, he scratches his cheek. “But it’s not like I’m goin’ anywhere for a while, so it wouldn’t kill them to take it a <em>little</em> easy, at least.”</p><p>Shikamaru sputters a laugh. “Sorry, but I don’t think that’s gonna happen. This <em>is</em> the Rival Three you’re talking about, remember? All you need is Kakashi there to make it the <em>biggest</em> rival smackdown of the year.”</p><p>Naruto winces. “Oh, man, you’re <em>right</em>! Yeah, there’s no way…” He sighs a bit. “Well, it was worth a shot…”</p><p>Kankuro laughs out loud, shaking his head. “I don’t think you have much to worry about. They might be overly competitive idiots, but they’re smart and strong as hell, too. They know not to push themselves <em>too</em> far. After all, they know they’ll be no good to you if they’re half-dead.”</p><p>Naruto grins. “Oh, don’t worry, I know! They’ll be just fine! I’ll just wait patiently—” Shikamaru snorts, and Naruto shoots him a smirk, “—till they come home!”</p><p>Kankuro grins and ruffles his hair. “That’s what I like to hear, little brother.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen and heart skips a beat. Did—did he just…? Just like Temari yesterday… That…that can’t be a coincidence, right? There’s no way. So…is this…their way of telling him, surprising him with it? If it is, then…he <em>loves</em> it. He loves it so much.</p><p>He loves <em>them</em>.</p><p><em>So</em>, so much…</p><p>His vision blurs, and try as he might, he can’t quite swallow the lump in his throat this time. All the same, he gives a raspy, overjoyed laugh and a blinding smile, and he’s not surprised at all when a few tears make their way down his cheeks.</p><p>Kankuro, for his part, can’t help but melt. So he picked up on his and Temari’s little code, huh? He figured he would, and he’s reacting just like he thought he would, too. He really is such a sweet, soft-hearted kid. How anyone could ever hurt or abuse him like Sasuke has…he swears he will <em>never</em> understand. Luckily, with Kankuro as his big brother now, he’ll make damn sure no one <em>ever</em> hurts him like that again.</p><p>Reaching forward, he wipes Naruto’s tears away with his sleeves, much like Gaara did yesterday. The blond goes still, eyes wide and cheeks heating up with his heart in his throat. The tender way Kankuro’s looking at him… He’s only seen it one other time, technically two: when he asked Naruto to save his little brother… and then again when he thanked him for keeping that promise…</p><p>The next thing he knows, Kankuro’s hugging him. Like with Temari yesterday, Naruto is shocked. He’s…never done this before either. It’s gentler than Temari’s, he notices, all-encompassing in the way Kankuro wraps his arms around him as far as they’ll go, but it’s still the same nice and safe and warm. Naruto welcomes it. He relaxes into his arms like a warm bath, closing his eyes and hugging him back.</p><p>This feels like…coming home somehow. Like he was always meant to end up here, in this place with these people. He doesn’t believe in destiny or fate, he adamantly believes in making his own path, but…he’s gotta say, there’s a pretty good argument in how he’s feeling right now. Maybe…destiny plays a lighter role in life than people think. Maybe it comes in the form of (seemingly) small, infinitely precious moments like this.</p><p>Whatever the case, he’s more than fine with it.</p><p>He knows he’s right where he belongs.</p><p>A tearful Kankuro presses a seconds-long kiss to his hair and whispers, “Welcome home.”</p>
<hr/><p>Once Naruto’s dinner comes around an hour later, the Sand siblings take their leave for the night.</p><p>“We need to check in with Lord Baki and the Council to make sure things are all right back home,” Gaara explains half-heartedly, once again reluctant to leave Naruto’s side. They’ve been talking since yesterday, catching up and having fun, but…still, it doesn’t feel like enough. He wants to stay. He’s sure it shows on his face. Especially given his next bit of news. “Based on our correspondence so far, there’s a massive sandstorm coming that would strand us here for a week or more if we stay any longer, so unfortunately, we’ll need to start heading back around noon tomorrow.”</p><p>Naruto is just as disappointed that they can’t stay the full three days, and Shikamaru feels for him, Gaara, too, but there’s not much they can do about the weather. They’ve all been briefed on the weather in neighboring Hidden villages for safety and interrelations reasons, and the Sand’s expansive desert is notorious for its sandstorms that come out of nowhere. Frankly, Shikamaru thinks it’s lucky they were given some warning. It’s not like the Kazekage can be away from his village for a week or more without some serious consequences.</p><p>Pushing his own feelings aside, Naruto does his best to cheer Gaara up, reaching over to squeeze his hand. He grins brightly. “Hey, don’t look so sad! We’ve still got the whole morning together tomorrow, right? And it’s not like this’ll be the last time I see you! Maybe once I’m finally out of here, you can come back, at least for a few days? Your Council guys might be in a good mood, you never know!”</p><p>Gaara isn’t sure if that will work – it’s rather hard to read most of them, to be honest, perhaps on purpose – but he can’t help but smile and breathe a laugh. Naruto’s enthusiasm is catching, as usual. He appreciates it. “That’s true. I hope you’re right. I—” he feels almost silly saying this next part, but he can’t help how he feels, a light blush coming, “—I feel like we’ve barely gotten any time together.”</p><p>Thankfully, it seems Naruto understands him completely. As always. He laughs out loud. “I know what you mean!” He rubs the back of his head, beaming for all it’s worth, not ashamed in the slightest. “Of course, I don’t think even <em>forever</em> would feel like enough!”</p><p>Surprised and touched, Gaara can’t help sputtering a laugh, which makes Naruto laugh, too, and that just drives them both into something of a laughing fit. It lasts long enough for Temari and Kankuro to get more than a little misty-eyed again, and then Gaara’s smile is full and bright, his once-shy blush now delighted. “Very true!”</p>
<hr/><p>The next morning, Gaara wastes no time in sitting at Naruto’s side.</p><p>Naruto, though, can’t help but notice that something’s a little different this time. Namely, Gaara’s brought something with him. An orange-wrapped, blue-bowed square box. Shikamaru glances at the orange vase with a blue bow Ino gave Naruto and smirks. Seems there’s a theme going on.</p><p>Gaara hands it to him, and Naruto, for all his growing, just blinks at him a few times, tilting his head. “What’s this?”</p><p>The redhead is completely unfazed by his lack of recognition, and both of those things just tell Shikamaru there’s more to this than meets the eye. “A present. Your sixteenth birthday was a week ago, if I recall correctly.”</p><p>Naruto looks at him like he’s grown a second head, but turns to Shikamaru to confirm. The older boy nods, and a small “Huh” leaves him. “So, I slept through my own birthday?” He rubs the back of his head, then links his hands there and grins toothily. “Well, at least none of the older villagers got to try anything this year!” (Unnoticed, Shikamaru’s face goes <em>dark</em> and murderous. <em>Oh</em>, he is asking what the <em>hell</em> that means the second they’re alone and then bringing it up with Lady Tsunade <em>ASAP</em>. Also stopping by Naruto’s apartment to make sure it hasn’t been trashed or vandalized.)</p><p>Gaara turns a little somber before motioning back to the present to try to get him thinking about happier things. Shikamaru’s grateful. “I know we Jinchuuriki aren’t accustomed to receiving presents, let alone for our birthdays, but this gift…” he pushes Naruto’s hand gently against the box, “…from one Jinchuuriki to another…” his sand swirls around their joined hands, the same way it did when they shook hands in saying goodbye after Naruto succeeded in rescuing him, “…one <em>friend</em> to another…” their eyes lock intensely, and Gaara smiles some, a whole lot for him, “…please accept it. Okay?”</p><p>Once he moves past his touched shock, Naruto melts and flips his hand over so he’s holding Gaara’s. Gaara, given a second’s surprise, gently holds his right back, small smile growing. Naruto grins, laughing. “A-all right, all right! Twist my arm, why don’t ya?”</p><p>He’s so careful opening the package, making sure to preserve the ribbon and every piece of wrapping paper and moving slowly, like he’ll never get to experience this again in his life, that it’s almost laughable, but Shikamaru instead finds it precious and heartbreaking at once.</p><p>What’s inside the box has Naruto staring for a good few seconds. He hesitates in reaching for it, as if touching it means he might break or taint it. But Gaara’s sand comes to the rescue once again (it’s good at that) and picks it up out of the box, bringing it closer until the sewn little nose connects with his.</p><p> “A…a teddy bear…?” Naruto’s voice, while confused, is also filled with awe.</p><p>Indeed, the present is a small brown bear, well-loved, but also very well taken care of.</p><p>Gaara nods, a small, serene, if a little sad, smile on his face. “It was mine when I was little. It was both my most prized possession and my only friend. It always brought me comfort, and I thought, since you’re here, it might bring you some comfort, too.”</p><p>A tear falls. Then another. Then they don’t stop. Gaara’s eyes widen, and it’s his turn to hesitate to reach out, worried he might have overstepped something. “A-are you all right? Did I do something wrong?”</p><p>Naruto quickly shakes his head, a tiny laugh of a sob escaping. “No...no, you’re—you’re <em>amazing</em>…” His smile is overjoyed, disbelieving. “W-when I was kid, I was afraid of the dark...a-and I was scared to be so alone…but I didn’t really h-have a choice, you know?” He sniffs. “I saw kids with bears like these all the time, and I wanted one so badly, j-just for company…” He laughs again, the sob happy. “I-I just think it’s funny…a-all these years later…a-and I finally get one…and it’s from—from someone who understands me…l-like no one else ever could…someone I’m—I’m <em>so</em> lucky to call one of my—b-best friends in the world…”</p><p>He hugs the bear close to his chest, cradles it, smile wider than ever before. “T-thank you so much… E-especially if it was yours back then…i-it means so much to me…” He rests his head on Gaara’s chest, tears still streaming. “Y-you really are the best… I-I love you so much…!”</p><p>Gaara’s heart beats rapidly in his chest, and there’s a bright blush on his face, but he just smiles so lovingly, expression melting as he gently wraps his arms around his friend. “I…love you, too, Naruto…” Tightening his hold on him, he nuzzles into bright blond hair. His smile grows as a happy tear slips from his eye. “You’re more than welcome… I’m so happy you like it…”</p><p>Behind them, Temari and Kankuro are having difficulty keeping themselves in check. Gaara had insisted on bringing his present with them on this trip, wanting to take advantage of the rare opportunity to deliver it himself. But they’d had <em>no</em> idea what his present actually was. He’d wanted it to be a surprise.</p><p>Temari watches the two with a trembling hand over her mouth, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Oh,<em> Gaara</em>…” Kankuro is in a similar state, head down, hood pulled over his eyes, arms crossed tightly over his chest in an effort to hide their trembling. He’s crying, too, gritting his teeth to keep tiny sobs inside. <em>Geez</em>, little brother…</p><p>The meaning behind this gift is not at <em>all</em> lost on them, and for Naruto to <em>understand</em> so intimately and react like this… Not only that, but <em>Naruto</em> is the only reason Gaara is <em>able</em> to say ‘I love you’ back, <em>at all</em>, and <em>truly mean it</em>…</p><p>It just makes them love Naruto more.</p><p>Once everyone’s composed again a good ten minutes later, the elder Sand siblings come closer. “We have something for you, too, Naruto!” Temari announces, smiling sunnily.</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and his cheeks color some, heart skipping. Two presents in one day? For him, for real? This has…never happened before. “R-really?” Suddenly feeling a little spoiled, he raises his hands in protest. He’s sure it shows on his face. “Y-you didn’t have to—”</p><p>There’s a forceful, yet still gentle poke to his forehead that pushes his head back till he’s looking at the ceiling, and the rest of his words die on his lips. “<em>Ah-ah</em>! Don’t start!” Temari winks when he looks back at her. “Besides, you’re wrong on that one! Of course we had to!” She throws an arm around each of her siblings’ shoulders, beaming now. They’re grinning, too. “Everyone deserves a happy birthday, right? <em>And</em> it’s your sixteenth! That means this one’s extra special!”</p><p>Naruto finds himself staring, speechless, and he can feel himself getting choked up again. His chest aches. Is that really how birthdays are supposed to work? He always figured, having watched other kids in the village celebrate their birthdays over the years, but he never dared to hope or dream for anything like that himself. Well, okay, maybe when he was really little, like four or so, but…never since. He had that beaten out of him (literally) pretty early on. He doesn’t really get why sixteen is so special (he’ll have to ask Shikamaru later), but…the idea is interesting, if nothing else. He wipes his eyes with the tissue Shikamaru hands him and grins excitedly back up at them. “R-right!” He bows his head low. “T-thank you so much!”</p><p>Kankuro snorts, ruffling his hair. “A little early to be thanking us. You don’t even know what it is yet, blondie.”</p><p>But he—they all—know it doesn’t matter what it is. That kind of thing would never matter to him. He’s just grateful to be seen, to be thought of, to be getting anything at all that isn’t an insult or a beating or something thrown at him, never mind that that kind of thing hasn’t happened nearly as much since he became a genin, even less so since returning from his training with Pervy Sage. Still…it’s the principle of the thing. Shikamaru literally <em>aches</em> to hug him, can feel it in his bones. He will as soon as they’re alone, he promises.</p><p>When he straightens, Temari presses a small cloth bag into his hand. “It was a little too small to wrap, sorry,” she explains, looking a little sheepish.</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, he beams excitedly, and shakes his head. “No, don’t worry! I don’t mind!” He’s still thrown that this is even happening, that he’s getting a second present at all. He hesitates to even let his fingers close around the bag, almost afraid that, if he does, he’ll wake up to find this was all an amazing dream. He’s extra careful opening this gift, too, just like before, never mind that all he has to do is pull a string and pull out the tissue paper, and Shikamaru bites his lip hard to keep from throwing his arms around him right then and there. <em>Damn it</em>… He never thought something as (seemingly) simple as opening birthday presents could make him so emotional.</p><p>Turns out, the present is a small, triangular vial about the size of his hand, counting his fingers, the liquid inside a neon pink color. He raises it so it shines in the sunlight streaming through the window, lighting up at the sight. “It’s so pretty!” He looks back at his friends. “What is it?”</p><p>Temari holds up a finger. “It’s a special healing elixir than can only be made in the Hidden Sand!” She rests a hand on Kankuro’s shoulder. “It’s what helped Kankuro get back on his feet so quickly once Sasori’s poison was out of his system.”</p><p>Naruto’s gaze snaps back to the potion. “Whoa, really?”</p><p>She nods. “We figured you’d be dying to get out of here and back to training like crazy—”</p><p>Shikamaru laughs. “Understatement of the year.”</p><p>Naruto just beams.</p><p>“—so, we thought we’d bring you this to help you along! At least until your advanced healing starts up again!” Kankuro finishes.</p><p>Naruto’s eyes shine. “Wow, thank you so much! This is awesome!”</p><p>Shikamaru eyes Temari for a moment before asking, “Is that what you asked the nurse about earlier?”</p><p>Temari just smiles wider, guilty as charged. She knew that wouldn’t get past him. “Yep! I ran it by Lady Tsunade the day we arrived, and she thought it was a great idea, but I wanted to make sure it was okay with those assigned to Naruto, too.” She shrugs. “Some of our medics back home are a little picky if someone above them talks for them, so I wanted to play it safe.”</p><p>Shikamaru nods. Smart. Since it’s so small and not really part of Naruto’s regimen, per se, he’s sure the nurses won’t mind if he keeps it with him. He’ll ask Temari how to administer it later.</p><p>“Kankuro, Temari?” The eldest turns back at Naruto’s soft voice. “Really, I mean it. Gaara was right when he said…” his eyes and free hand move to his seal, the smile on his face turning a little sad, “…we Jinchuuriki don’t get presents, <em>especially</em> not for our birthdays. This is…one of the first ones I’ve ever gotten.” He laughs, but it’s somewhat bitter. “Unless you count being chased or beaten or poisoned while people tell you you’re a monster and they wish you’d die, but…” another like laugh, and he completely misses the way Shikamaru’s eyes are <em>blazing</em>, white-knuckled fingers clutching his knees; when this is over, he wants <em>names</em>, “…I’m sure you don’t.” When he looks up again, his smile is back, and the tears he’d been trying to keep in start to fall. Oh, well. It’s not like he’s not used to crying in front of them by now. “S-so…something like this…” he holds the elixir a little tighter, free hand holding Gaara’s old teddy bear close in his lap, like they’re gifts from the gods, “…and yours, too, Gaara…” his smile is shaky, but only because of the joy and relief and <em>love</em> filling his chest; a happy sob escapes, he bows as low as he can, and the floodgates open, “…t-thank you so much…! F-for everything…! I—” he has to wait till he can speak past happy sobs, “—I love you <em>s-so</em> much…!”</p><p>A moment later, Temari and Kankuro embrace him as tightly as they can without hurting him, crying themselves. Even though they always suspected as much, it hurts to get confirmation that they were right about Naruto’s past birthdays. Gaara’s were a lot like that, too, when he was younger (the fact that the villagers never actually <em>succeeded</em> in hurting him wasn’t the point, and it certainly didn’t diminish the trauma). Eventually, it became the opposite—where the villagers were too afraid to go near him, so they’d pretend he didn’t exist, and they’re sure it happened to Naruto, too. They know exactly, <em>intimately</em>, what all that’s like.</p><p>“We love you, too, Naruto,” Temari whispers.</p><p>“<em>So</em> much,” Kankuro settles.</p><p>Naruto just smiles wider and hugs them back with everything he has in him, streaming tears be damned. He laughs happily. He loves their real presents, but…for him, <em>this</em> right here is everything he could have ever wanted.</p><p>(Naruto sleeps with Gaara’s bear that night and every night after.)</p>
<hr/><p>They’ll have to be heading out soon, Gaara sees by the clock. But before they do, he has one more question that he absolutely needs an answer to before he can contentedly go home.</p><p>“Naruto…” The boy turns at his serious, concerned tone, giving him his full, undivided attention. A heartbeat. “Are you happy?”</p><p>Naruto blinks, heart stuttering. “W-what?”</p><p>“Are you happy?” Gaara repeats, tilting his head a little. “With your decision about Sasuke.”</p><p>Oh.</p><p><em>Oh</em>…</p><p>Naruto…actually has to sit back and think about that one. He’s been so hung up on making sure everyone <em>else</em> understands and isn’t angry with or hurt by his decision that…he forgot to even <em>think</em> about himself. Against the wall with Temari, Shikamaru watches and listens closely, concerned and kicking himself.</p><p>Naruto is…okay with his decision, yes. He thinks it’s ultimately what’s best for everyone, including him. To keep doing what he’s been doing, worrying and scaring everyone and nearly getting himself killed when it’s clear as day to him now that Sasuke is a lost cause…it wouldn’t be fair to the people he loves, to those who’ve stayed and stuck by him, who <em>truly</em> love him and have <em>earned</em> their places in his heart. He’s sure they’d all say that it wouldn’t be fair to <em>him</em> most of all.</p><p>In the end, he really does think it’s best for Sasuke, too. He wants to cut ties with the Leaf and everyone he knew, and…if that’s what Naruto and all of them want, too, then everyone wins, right? He’s not sure how Itachi would feel, seeing as he did everything he did to protect Sasuke and the Leaf, and yet that same little brother’s now hell-bent on destroying both. For God’s sake, he’s already nothing like the Sasuke Itachi knew. He’s too far gone for that.</p><p>He also thinks it’s the best possible way to protect his village and everyone he cares about, to protect his own body and heart and mind from being hurt anymore, to protect himself from being used and abused and taken advantage of and for granted anymore.</p><p>But…asking if he’s <em>happy</em> about it…? He’s…not sure how he’s supposed to know that…</p><p>Of course, then he remembers the others’ relieved, overjoyed, proud faces when he told them his decision, how they reacted (Sakura on her second try), and…he takes his time to think about how he’s been feeling, too. It hasn’t been easy, and it still hurts like hell. Every time he talks about it, though it’s been easier sometimes, is slowly getting less excruciating each time, it still feels like a Rasengan to the heart. He suspects it’ll hurt for a long time. Maybe it’ll never stop completely. Hell, Pervy Sage was an old man, and he was still hurting from what Orochimaru did to him and Granny Tsunade, even all those years later. He <em>knows</em> how much it still hurts Granny Tsunade…</p><p>Suddenly, Naruto’s eyes widen. A slow, silent, new breath fills his lungs. There’s a new light to his eyes.</p><p>If…if Pervy Sage could see him now, could hear what he had to say…he <em>knows</em> how he’d react. He’d be relieved as all hell, joyful and laughing and maybe even hug him, possibly even cry a tear or two into his hair where he wouldn’t see. He wouldn’t let him go for a long time. He’d…he’d <em>definitely </em>be <em>so</em> happy for him. That’s the only way it would <em>ever</em> turn out.</p><p>And thinking of it like that, picturing it, feeling it like it’s happening to him right at that moment…he can’t help it when a tear sneaks from his eye.</p><p>When he finally looks back up at Gaara, the smile on his face is as soft as sunlight through clouds. With the bright sunlight streaming in to shine on him like this, there’s almost something…ethereal about him here.</p><p>“I don’t know if I’m there just yet, but...I will be. Maybe not tomorrow or a month or even a few months from now, but somehow, I just have a good feeling…” He looks out at the sunny, blue sky, the one his master always loved so much. “Someday, I’ll look back on this and think it’s one of the best decisions I ever made.” He turns back to Gaara, beaming like the sun. “And with friends like you and Shikamaru and the others, I bet I’ll be able to do that even sooner!”</p><p>Shikamaru sighs in relief, so much that he hangs his head and his chest hurts. He scrubs a hand down his face. Thank goodness…! Temari and Kankuro are just as relieved. Gaara takes a deep, cleansing breath through his nose and lets it out his mouth, just the way Naruto taught him. Then, he smiles and steps forward to hug Naruto as tightly as he dares. “I’m glad to hear that.” He holds him just a little tighter. “I’m very proud of you, Naruto.”</p><p>Hugging him back just as tightly, nuzzling into his shoulder freely, Naruto smiles. He feels better, lighter, than he has since he made his decision. “<em>Thank you</em>, Gaara…”</p>
<hr/><p>At Naruto’s behest, Shikamaru walks their friends to the Main Gate.</p><p>They’re in a bit of a hurry, not wanting to be caught by the sandstorm, but they want to make the most of this time, too. Kankuro and Temari have already said their goodbyes when they notice that Gaara’s been quiet, his eyes locked in the direction of the hospital. Not that they can blame him, Shikamaru either. They nudge him gently. “Gaara.”</p><p>He snaps out of it, flushing the slightest bit when he realizes his rudeness. He dips his head. “M-my apologies.”</p><p>Shikamaru, understanding completely, waves his hands and shakes his head, smiling gently. “Don’t worry about it.”</p><p>“Naruto…” Gaara looks toward his room again, a small, serene smile coming as he turns back to Shikamaru. “Please…” he bows as low as he can at the waist, “…take care of him for me.” When he straightens, he clarifies, “Not as a favor to the Kazekage, just…as a friend. His…” his blush is more pronounced this time, smile, too, “…my best, one of his.”</p><p>The brunet softens and nods, standing a little taller and making the mark of an ‘x’ over his heart. Something he learned from Naruto. “I will. You don’t have to worry about him while I’m around. I promise.”</p><p>Gaara nods, more than satisfied with that answer, the driven look in his eyes and the steel in his voice even more. He smiles warmly. “I’m well aware. Thank you very much.”</p><p>Shikamaru nods. Of course, that just reminds him. He rubs the back of his head. “Sorry you have to miss his birthday celebration, by the way. Lady Tsunade, Team Kakashi, and I just thought he’d enjoy it more if he could actually move around for it,” he shrugs, “you know?”</p><p>Gaara chuckles and shakes his head. “It’s all right. You’re right, after all.” He points toward the sky. “If you could send a message a few days before you’re going to have it, I’d like to send something back. If you don’t mind?”</p><p>Shikamaru raises an eyebrow and tilts his head. He already gave Naruto a present, though…Temari and Kankuro are just as confused.</p><p>Sensing as much, Gaara explains, cool gaze moving to the sky, “Because someone who knows how scary it is to be alone…” it settles on Naruto’s room again, “…can’t help but love others.” His smile is peaceful and bright, loving as hell when he comes back. “That’s how Naruto operates, and as someone who’s known that same pain, someone who wishes to follow in his footsteps, I want to give back as much as I can. This is just another small way I can do that.”</p><p>Shikamaru is struck speechless for a long moment before he grins helplessly. Really, these Jinchuuriki, he swears… Kankuro and Temari are just as touched. “Of course I don’t mind.” His smile widens as he bows his head. “Thank you, Gaara. I’m sure he’ll be really happy.”</p><p>Temari rests a hand on Gaara’s shoulder. “We should probably start heading out. We don’t want to be stranded out there.”</p><p>Gaara nods. “You’re right.” Turning back to Shikamaru, he bows again. “Thank you for everything, Shikamaru. I hope we see each other again soon.”</p><p>The shadow wielder grins. “No problem! I hope so, too. Have a safe trip back. If you don’t mind sending word once you get home safely, I’m sure Naruto and I would both appreciate it.”</p><p>“Of course.”</p><p>With that, they take their leave, walking until the treeline gets a little thicker. Shikamaru stays to watch till he can’t see them anymore, just to ensure they get off to a good start. He already knows Naruto will ask.</p><p>“Hey, Nara!” He looks over to find Temari beaming at him, warm and proud and teasing in one. “Good luck with that dream of yours!” She winks. “Take care of it for me!”</p><p>He blinks, surprised and caught off guard, a small blush coming, and then he sighs fondly. Nodding back at her, he waves some, more than he usually does. “Don’t worry, I will!”</p><p>It’s Naruto, after all. <em>Someone</em> has to do it, and it might as well be him. He won’t accept anyone else.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The timeline for Naruto's birthday in the series is wonky/never really talked about, lol, so I put it at this point because it <i>can</i> make sense? Hear me out. 'Cause we know he was already 12 when the series started, but don't know how long he was 12, so if we're assuming he turned 13 maybe right before Sasuke left-ish (which we are, mentioned in ch 2), and then he left with Jiraiya for 2.5 years, he would be around 15.5 when he came back to the village. And when they're going after Gaara a few eps into <i>Shippuden</i>, they're saying it's just about been 3 years, but that's a little screwy since they just said it was 2.5 a few eps ago, lol, so if we put that back a bit and say it's still 5-6 months before he turns 16 and that's how long it takes to get through ep 215 and all this, then I'm having him turn 16 while he was asleep 'cause...creative license and logic and...I can! lol. Hope that makes sense!</p><p>For the record: Naruto is more than okay with saying 'I love you' openly 'cause, I mean, he's kinda done it before in the show (a movie I know for sure, but maybe the show, too? Hard to recall, so many damn eps, haha), and he's a very open, emotional person in general, and love in particular is extremely important to him because he was so deprived growing up, so he isn't afraid to express himself like that now. Gaara, while not as, is okay with it from certain people, like his siblings and Naruto.</p><p>Just in case anyone's confused/doesn't recall, Temari teases Shikamaru about being a crybaby (with love!) because she was the one who waited with him and saw him break down after the failed Sasuke retrieval mission in Part 1, after he learned Naruto was found alive (if barely) and everyone survived. She also advises him to stop complaining about what a drag everything is in the first few eps of <i>Shippuden</i>, just before she heads back to the Sand (and finds out Gaara was kidnapped). Hope everyone likes the little extra bit of history I gave Temari and Shikamaru (also them being pen pals, lol)! I felt they deserved it! They have such a fun relationship! lol.</p><p>The part where Naruto imagines Jiraiya embracing him so strongly that he swears he almost feels it and the sunlight hits him so he looks almost otherworldly is kind of meant to say that it <i>might</i> have actually happened, but it's up to interpretation, really! ;) However you want to take that!</p><p>For those who will undoubtedly ask, <i>yes</i>, I threw in some minor Kankuro/Tenten hints, lol. I said there would be no ships in this fic, but you know, background stuff, I don't really count, so... Haha! I am a sucker for that rare pair, so figured it might be fun to drop a few hints, is all! Hope that's okay with everyone! If not, my bad, feel free to ignore!</p><p>(I sneaked another Fruits Basket reboot reference into this chapter! lol. Toward the end there, Gaara says this line, but it was originally said by Rin Sohma in s2e19, "There's No Way, None!": "Because someone who knows how scary it is to be alone…can't help but love others."</p><p>There's also a really tiny nod to Studio Ghibli's <i>Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind</i> in here, too! When Shikamaru thinks 'What a mysterious power he has...' about Naruto, it quotes Lord Yupa's thought about Nausicaa and her way of calming even the most savage beasts/deep connection with the world around her! ;)</p><p>And of course, that last little line/para(?)! Not sure if anyone caught it, but basically the entire thing is a reference to what Shikamaru says about sticking with Naruto in <i>Shippuden</i> episode 383, "Pursuing Hope": "Well, then…that's why, even more so…I need to stick around…so that I can stand next to that idiot when he becomes Hokage. …Because there's no one more qualified than me to be Naruto's advisor." (Again, I could have sworn it was more of a direct quote, but oh, well! lol.))</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0011"><h2>11. Reflections</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Ino finally gets to visit her favorite ramen-loving knucklehead, and a few others drop by as well. It's a regular party in this hospital room. (Catharsis/break chapter)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><i>Hello</i>, everybody! Sorry if this chapter took a little! I've been very busy with my two jobs (and my extra side job has recently picked up a bit, too), and I was also on vacation in Nebraska, actually, until today, just got back home last night, haha! My bad! (I promise I'll answer everyone's INCREDIBLE reviews for any recently-read chapters ASAP! Sorry for delay, but I love and appreciate all of you!) But every spare moment I had, I was working on this chapter! I <i>do</i> apologize for the chapter length! That was <i>not</i> intentional! I actually thought this would be one of the shorter chapters, and I really tried to cut it down, but...it just kept getting longer instead! lol. Whoops! Hope that's okay and doesn't kill anyone! (This is the longest chapter yet, in fact, pfft!)</p>
<p>And on that note, I would like to explain that this is the <i>catharsis</i> chapter! Meaning, if you're not a nerd about writing terminology like me (I thought it sounded so cool when we learned it in 12th grade Advanced Placement English that I committed it to memory, okay? LMAO), a 'breath of fresh air/break from the emotions.' lol. In other words, this chapter <i>does</i> definitely still have a good number of feels in it, namely this first Shikamaru-Naruto section, and there are more strewn throughout, but for the most part, this chapter is meant to let these kids be kids and have fun/spend time with their families for once, dang it! lol. Hopefully that's okay with you lovely readers!</p>
<p>The last half of the final section was actually inspired by a really cute, sweet Tumblr art post I found a few months or so back! I asked Fresco Mayor (the artist) for permission to use <a href="https://frescomayor.tumblr.com/post/128591042694/8">their work</a> as a basis, and they said yes! Hope you love it as much as I did! (Also hope I did it justice in my fic! Thanks so much, Fresco! You're the best!)</p>
<p><b><i>As far as this AU goes:</i></b> I only just remembered today from rewatching eps for research purposes that, due to events in the Pein arc, Tsunade was not at the Summit. Danzo, as Acting Hokage, was, and that's why/how that son of a bitch finally got what he deserved (hallelujah!). But since the Pein arc hasn't happened yet in this AU...let's just say Tsunade went there instead and Danzo, as the selfish control/power freak who takes matters into his own hands because he thinks the Hokage is a fool he is, still dies in the exact same way.</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Shikamaru comes back into Naruto’s hospital room to find him straining to see out the window. He’s craning his neck and holding himself up with shaky arms, even sitting on top of his pillows for a tiny bit of extra height. The brunet can’t help but blink and breathe a laugh as he makes his way back to his side, and his fond smile only grows when Naruto turns to beam at him a second later. “Hey, you’re back! So, how’d it go? Did they get going okay?”</p>
<p>Shikamaru nods as he sits back down, on the bed beside him this time. “Mm hmm. I made sure. Watched till I couldn’t see ‘em anymore, then double-checked with the Gate guards, too.”</p>
<p>If possible, Naruto’s beam just brightens as he chuckles. “Thanks, Shikamaru! I knew I could count on you!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru loses his breath at the sudden high praise, cheeks coloring some, but he just smiles softly with pride a moment later. “You’re welcome, but it’s not like it was a big job or anything.”<br/>
<br/>
Naruto raises an eyebrow and tilts his head. “Well, yeah, but it’s not like <em>I</em> could have gone, so really,” he grins toothily, “I appreciate it!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru stares at his smiling face, and the many times during this little visit that he’d wanted to hug the hell out of Naruto flash in his mind’s eye…</p>
<p>A heartbeat, and then his arms are wrapped around the blond as tightly as he dares. Naruto’s frozen, unprepared and definitely confused, but he returns the hug without fail a moment later. Of course he does. He doesn’t even consider stopping himself from closing his eyes and nuzzling in just the way he wants either. He knows Shikamaru won’t mind. “Shikamaru…?” he prompts quietly once a few more moments have passed, only wanting him to explain if he wants. He won’t push him. After all, he’s certainly not complaining about this. He just wants to know if his friend needs him.</p>
<p>Shikamaru presses his face into his shoulder a little more, too, unable to help himself for one reason or another. “Sorry, I just…I’ve been barely holding this back for hours. So…indulge me for a little, will ya?”</p>
<p>And Naruto can’t do anything with that but hug him tighter and press his face into the crook between Shikamaru’s neck and shoulder. It’s so warm, and he feels so safe and loved, and…he wouldn’t trade this for anything. “Take all the time you need,” he breathes. “I’m not going anywhere.”</p>
<p>They stay like that for…well, neither of them is sure how long exactly. In the end, they don’t really care. It makes them happy, and that’s all that matters.</p>
<p>When they finally separate, Shikamaru ruffles his hair, and Naruto leans into it eagerly with a brilliant smile, just like always. The older boy softens. He wishes he didn’t <em>also</em> remember the reasons he wanted to hug Naruto so badly…but he did, and he still wants to get to the bottom of it. Resolving to do just that, he takes a breath. “Naruto…” the blond notices the change in him almost instantly, the more serious air about him, and sobers, “...there’s something that’s been bothering me, and I was hoping you could clear it up.”</p>
<p>Naruto isn’t sure what he means, but he trusts him. He nods. “O-okay. What is it?”</p>
<p>Shikamaru’s eyes roam over Naruto’s injuries, the legs he still can’t use, the arm he couldn’t move until a few days ago, the endless bandages peeking out of his hospital gown—</p>
<p>Thinks about the way Naruto still flinches and has to steel himself when people yell too close to him or move too quickly around him, the haunted way he stared at the blood Sakura dealt, how he shielded himself from <em>Granny Tsunade</em>, of all people, when he thought he was going to be hit and cast out—</p>
<p>Has kept a running list since they were kids of how the tiniest things no one else would ever keep or hold dear or think twice about (flowers, a get-well note, a ‘be back soon’ scribble) mean the world to him, how he breathes in and drinks up any hint of fondness like it’s the air and elixir of the gods, how the tiniest brush of physical affection will make his touch-starved soul yours for all time…</p>
<p>…All the scars on Naruto’s heart he can’t see…</p>
<p>He has to swallow back his rage and, more importantly, the lump steadily growing in his throat. He’s gripping his knee and the sheets in a death grip again, but he doesn’t care. It’s <em>warranted</em>, damn it. “You…you were a <em>child</em>, and they still…”</p>
<p>His knuckles crack while Naruto’s brow furrows. How could anyone do that to a <em>kid</em>, let alone <em>Naruto</em>? He’s a fucking <em>ray of sunshine</em>, and Shikamaru specifically remembers that being especially true when he was little! Naruto had wanted the other villagers to learn to like him, to know he wasn’t as bad as they thought, the other kids in particular, so he’d done his best to be kind and well-behaved and sweet, just himself, really, knowing just from watching the others that they wouldn’t like him if he wasn’t. But obviously, it hadn’t worked, and that’s the worst part of it. They’d hated him even more for it, and to know it got to the points Naruto’s talked about… It makes Shikamaru want to be sick, never mind kick those villagers’ asses to high Heaven.</p>
<p>Naruto’d had no idea he had the Nine Tails in him due to the Third’s decree, and those villagers <em>knew</em> that. Their kids probably didn’t, just followed their parents’ feelings of hatred, and he knows the Kononha 11 are no different in that respect, but still… At least the Konoha 11 didn’t <em>hurt</em> him, and they never actually <em>hated</em> him either. Honestly, he still doesn’t understand what the adults’ problem was. It’s not like Naruto <em>chose</em> to be the Nine Tails’ vessel. It’s not like he’d wanted it, like he’d <em>asked</em> for it. He wasn’t even an hour old when it was sealed inside him, for God’s sake! (Although, if asked, he’s sure Naruto would say he wouldn’t have wanted to pass his burden to anyone else because then they’d suffer, too, and he wouldn’t want that…the idiot…)</p>
<p>All Naruto knew was that the entire village had hated him for seemingly no reason all his life, had chased and beaten and poisoned him, wished him dead, did anything and everything they could to make his life a living hell. And then, once he found out years later at a still-tender twelve, at least from what Iruka-sensei’s told him and what he saw of Naruto afterward, he was terrified, horrified, disgusted, hated himself even more. Every horrible thing that had ever been said or done to him now suddenly, <em>finally</em> made sense, he was able to put a <em>real</em> name to it instead of the one he’d made up to save his own sanity (if he hadn’t, Shikamaru knows Naruto pictures himself in the old Gaara’s shoes, and he still wouldn’t have blamed him for anything)…</p>
<p>But at what cost?</p>
<p><em>None</em> of that was fair or right or anywhere close, and it drives Shikamaru <em>crazy</em> with regret and heartache and fury at himself that he didn’t see it, didn’t put together the Nine Tails’ sealing for himself, didn’t step in and <em>help</em> and <em>heal</em> more than he did. He was just as ignorant as the rest of them, in his opinion, even with his father encouraging him to make his own decisions about Naruto, even with all the times he did his best to reach out and protect him, even from the shadows, and he hates it more than he’s hated just about anything.</p>
<p>But still, in spite of all that—!</p>
<p>Like he’s rescuing him from unforgiving depths, Naruto reaches out to gently uncurl his white-knuckled fingers from the sheets and around his knee, and as he runs his thumbs feather-lightly over the backs of Shikamaru’s fingers, he looks at him like he’s the most precious thing in the entire world.</p>
<p>Shikamaru’s heart leaps and twists at once. Oh, <em>Naruto</em>… That’s how everyone in this village, everyone in the whole damn world, should be looking at <em>you</em>…</p>
<p>“Whatever you’re thinking about, it’s hurting you,” he observes quietly. He smiles, but it’s halved between pained and loving. Maybe the pain <em>of</em> loving. He squeezes his fingers gently. “I don’t like it when you’re hurt, so…would ya tell me what you wanted to say already? Please?” A heartbeat. “You said I could help, right? So let me.”</p>
<p>Shikamaru doesn’t…know how to start at first, <em>if</em> he can. This is a lot more emotional than he thought it would be… But he looks into the bright, deep blue depths of Naruto’s eyes and takes another breath, deeper this time than the last, in through his nose and out through his mouth. Threading his fingers through Naruto’s, he squeezes right back. Maybe a little stronger, half for himself and half for his friend.</p>
<p>—Despite <em>all</em> of that, despite everything, Naruto still turned out like <em>this</em>, the sun in so many of their lives, his especially, and Shikamaru is where he is now, right at his side, where he’s realized he <em>always</em> wants to stay.</p>
<p><em>That</em> isn’t something to regret. That’s something to <em>celebrate</em> like hell.</p>
<p>It’s what lets him know he can do this, too.</p>
<p>He swallows and takes another breath, then fixes Naruto with a determined stare. There’s righteous fire in his eyes. “You told Choji and me about how you were poisoned a few times when you were little. You also told Temari and Kankuro about being chased and beaten, especially on your birthdays, and you were happy and relieved that the villagers didn’t have a chance to do anything to you on your birthday this year.” Naruto blinks, stomach sinking a bit. Did he…really tell them all that? That was…mostly just in passing, though, right? So, why…? Shikamaru narrows his eyes some, squeezing his hands again. “I need you to tell me who they were, everything you can remember. Names would be preferable, if you have them.”</p>
<p>Naruto looks at him with searching eyes, lips parted slightly. That…is not what he was expecting. “But…I don’t think I have any…” He scratches the back of his head before taking up Shikamaru’s hand again. “It—it was so long ago, and I was just a little kid for most of it. I…I barely remember their faces, and I don’t think I ever knew their names—not enough to remember them now, anyway…” He shrugs. “B-besides, a lot of the adults covered their faces with scarves and stuff so they wouldn’t be recognized, so…”</p>
<p>Like the string that’s been holding him up’s been cut, Shikamaru deflates with a rough sigh. He thought it might be something like that, but still…he was hopeful… “So, you’re telling me you can’t remember anything?” He sounds tired—exhausted, even.</p>
<p>Naruto nods, raising an eyebrow. “Yeah, that’s…what I just said.” He tugs gently on his hand, not unlike a little kid. “I don’t get it, though. Why’s it matter so much anyway?” He offers a small, confused smile. “Like I said, it was a long time ago, right? So what’s with the third degree all of a sudden?”</p>
<p>Shikamaru looks wounded, and then an inferno blazes behind his eyes. “Because it’s still hurting you!”</p>
<p>That sucker punch leaves Naruto breathless. “W-what?”</p>
<p>Shikamaru squeezes his hands. “I’m not blind, okay? I <em>know</em> you, Naruto. I’ve been your friend for years now, and you’ve said yourself I’m smart and observant as hell. Don’t think I don’t notice the signs, the ways those bastards still hurt you to this day.” Taking a breath, he’s calmer and softer when he speaks up next. “I don’t know. It might all be subconscious for you or just so ingrained that you don’t even notice. But two examples are how you shielded yourself from Tsunade and the look on your face after Sakura hit you, more so once you saw the blood in your lap.”</p>
<p>Naruto is staring at him, pale and feeling so very exposed. His hands shake the smallest bit in Shikamaru’s grasp. He knew all that, but… He feels like he might be sick…</p>
<p>Shikamaru sighs, then rests Naruto’s hand on top of his other one so he can sandwich them between both of his. He hates that he’s hurting Naruto with this. He was trying to help, but… “Look, Naruto…” his voice is gentle, barely above a whisper, “…I couldn’t protect you back then, so I want to be there for you now. That’s the only reason I’m asking. I just thought, if you knew anything…”</p>
<p>Naruto swallows, and it takes him a moment to find his voice. “I…I figured… You wouldn’t ask something like this unless you had a good reason…” He huffs something of a laugh and half-looks up at him, eyes haunted even as he offers a tiny smile. “I know you, too, remember?” He licks his lips, his mouth suddenly very dry. “I’m sorry I can’t help, but I honestly don’t remember anything. All their faces kind of blend together in my mind, and I don’t remember any of their names, <em>if</em> they ever said them around me.” He snorts, but it’s more sardonic than anything. “They were really careful about that…”</p>
<p>Letting that sink in, Shikamaru sighs again, lighter this time, before he closes his eyes and leans forward to rest the star of his face against their joined hands, Naruto’s in particular. “I understand,” he breathes, barely that. He <em>definitely</em> sounds exhausted now. “I hurt you by bringing this up. That wasn’t my intention. I’m sorry. Just…forget I said anything, okay?”</p>
<p>
  <em>Whoosh!</em>
</p>
<p>The next thing he knows, Naruto is throwing his arms around Shikamaru’s neck and hugging him as tightly as he can. He buries his face in his shoulder and shakes his head vehemently. “No! No, I—I get it, I do! I appreciate it, really! You—you have <em>no</em> idea how much!” He trembles a little in Shikamaru’s hold, his voice a little choked when he speaks up again, and the brunet just holds him tighter. “You’re the first person to ever ask something like this, to—to ever <em>offer</em> it. I was just…caught off guard, that’s all. All those memories at once…” He breathes a weighty laugh. “It’s fine, though. I can—I’m okay, I swear…” He presses his face deeper into his shoulder. “<em>Thank you</em>, Shikamaru…”</p>
<p>Shikamaru lets his fingers curl in Naruto’s hospital gown and shakes his head in turn. “You don’t have to thank me. Hell, I feel like I did more harm than good, but…you’re welcome anyway.”</p>
<p>He hates knowing he’s the first (<em>only</em>) person to offer something like this, knowing Naruto’s history like he does. The fact that some of them covered their <em>faces</em> like fucking cowards while brutalizing a <em>child</em>… Shikamaru doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to forget that. It’s revolting. But in the end…he knows Naruto’s right. It was so long ago, and getting justice for it now might only bring him more pain, particularly when he’s just getting the village to see he’s more than the demon they always thought. And on some level, Shikamaru knew that, but…he still wanted to try. He still wanted to do what he could to help, especially if some things are still happening, at least on his birthday. And even if he can’t do anything about the past…he wishes there was something he could do in the present, for his future, too…</p>
<p>“You know you don’t have anything to feel guilty or sorry for, right?”</p>
<p>It’s said so quietly, so sacredly, Shikamaru almost misses it, but he’s glad he doesn’t. Slowly pulling back, he looks at Naruto with wide eyes, feeling exposed himself now. Of course, that’s not really an unfamiliar feeling with Mr. Emotional Intelligence himself. “Meaning what, exactly?”</p>
<p>Naruto beams in that way of his that never fails to make Shikamaru feel better, big and bright and warm, and the brunet feels affection storm his chest. “You’re here with me now, aren’t you? Hell, you protected me just the other day when Sakura punched me. So don’t worry about back then. What matters is where you are now.” Naruto said something similar to Gaara just a few days ago, didn’t he? The blond’s smile turns soft and sheepish. “I’m sorry, too, though. I made you worry. That’s the last thing I wanted to do.”</p>
<p>Shikamaru blinks, and then snorts, smirking. “You’re my friend <em>and</em> our number one knuckleheaded ninja. It’s in the job description to worry about you, idiot.”</p>
<p>Naruto just chuckles. “Right...” He holds out a fist with a wide smile. “So just…keep being my friend, okay?”</p>
<p>Shikamaru stares for a moment before breathing a laugh of his own. That’s his Naruto, all right… He bares a toothy grin as he knocks their fists together.</p>
<p>“Always.”</p><hr/>
<p>Hours later, just after Naruto’s finished his dinner, including that day’s dose of Temari and Kankuro’s healing elixir (it works best before bed, Shikamaru was told, so he figured with dinner would be best), Naruto is telling Shikamaru about how Gaara stopped the Raikage from fighting Sasuke at the Summit, and Shikamaru can’t help but burst out laughing along with his friend.</p>
<p>“Gaara really said that to the <em>Raikage</em>?! Man, that guy really has no fear when it comes to you, does he?” Not that he can blame him, of course. He really has come to appreciate that about the redhead.</p>
<p>“Oh, it’s true, all right,” both boys look over at the new voice, “and it really was that funny!”</p>
<p>Naruto beams. “Granny Tsunade!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru grins softly, nodding in greeting. “Evening, Lady Tsunade.”</p>
<p>The woman smiles at them both, ruffling Naruto’s hair as she reaches them, as she’s wont to do. “Evening, boys. You seem like you’re in good spirits.” Sitting on the bed at Naruto’s side, she gets to the point, smile growing, a bit of a smirk tacked on to the end. “<em>So</em>, how’d you like your little surpri—<em>ahhh</em>!”</p>
<p>Naruto is practically tackling her in a hug before she can blink, and she laughs out loud in delight while hugging him back. “It was the best surprise <em>ever</em>! Thank you <em>so</em> much! You’re the <em>best</em>, you know that?” He buries his face in her shoulder, breathes her in. After a moment or two of soaking it all in, his voice lowers, softens. “It was <em>so</em> good to see them. I haven’t gotten to <em>really</em> visit with them in a long time. It was…” he breathes a laugh, “…<em>exactly</em> what I needed. Thank you <em>so</em> much.”</p>
<p>Tsunade strengthens her hold, expression melting. “I’m so happy to hear that, Naruto. I had a feeling it might help. I think it helped them, too.” They stay like that a little longer before she slowly pulls back. “So, what exactly did I miss?”</p>
<p>“Oh, don’t worry, I’ll tell you <em>everything</em>!”</p>
<p>“You should show her what they brought you for your birthday, too,” Shikamaru suggests, loving the way Naruto lights up at the reminder.</p>
<p>“Oh, yeah!” Hands fisted excitedly at half-mast, his eyes shine when he looks at her. “You wanna see, Granny?”</p>
<p>Tsunade can’t help but laugh. His enthusiasm is infectious. “I’d love to!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru watches it all with a perfectly content smile. Honestly…such a charmer…</p><hr/>
<p>The next two days pass quickly. Naruto is ever so slowly getting stronger, and he thinks he even feels the Nine Tails shift once or twice for the first time since he woke up. Maybe it’s finally waking up, too, or at least getting there.</p>
<p>Once it does, he’s hoping they can talk. He still has a lot of questions, and he still wants to thank it, too.</p>
<p>Shikamaru is more than happy to stick by his side through it all.</p><hr/>
<p>“Hey, Sakura! What brings you here so early?”</p>
<p>Sakura snaps out of her thoughts at the familiar voice. Looking up, she smiles, a bit sheepish at having been caught spacing out admiring her friend’s flowers. “G-good morning, Ino!”</p>
<p>Ino, dressed in her work apron, walks over to her shop’s outside perimeter and crouches down beside her. Tilting her head, she smirks a bit. “With you so quiet all the way down here, I thought you were one of my flowers for a second! You’re lucky I didn’t try to water you!”</p>
<p>Sakura can’t help but laugh at that, sticking her tongue out playfully before raising her hands in her own defense. “S-sorry about that. I didn’t mean to space out, I just…” She looks back at the flowers. “I haven’t been by to see Naruto since Lady Tsunade’s punishment the other day, so I wanted to bring him something.” Ino narrows her eyes and raises a slightly judgmental eyebrow, and Sakura rushes to explain. “I-I only didn’t go because Naruto had some guests – Gaara, Temari, and Kankuro – and I wanted to give them their space, I swear!” She rests her hands on her knees. “You know how much Naruto loves them, especially Gaara.”</p>
<p>Ino nods, sighing in relief with a hand going to her chest. “Oh, good! For a minute there, I thought you were gonna say you and Naruto got into it again or something!”</p>
<p>Sakura’s eyes widen, though she unfortunately understands and owns up to the confusion, and she shakes her head vehemently. “N-no way! Never again, if I can help it! I promised him and myself I’d never be that blind again!” Her expression is so earnest, it’d actually be kind of funny if circumstances were different.</p>
<p>A heartbeat, two, and then Ino drops a warm, solid hand on Sakura’s head with a chuckle. “Hey, don’t worry so much.” Her voice is kind and gentle, and a surprised Sakura sees her matching expression when she looks up. “I know you meant what you said when you were here the other night, and I know you really are going to do your best to make up for your mistakes. That’s the kind of person you are, billboard brow.” She winks, smile growing. “Trust me, I know my best friend. You don’t have to explain yourself to me. Not about this, anyway.”</p>
<p>Sakura smiles happily, a like blush painting her cheeks. “T-thanks, Ino!”</p>
<p>Ino laughs. “Of course! What are friends for, right?” Turning to the flowers Sakura’s been looking at, she points and asks, “So are these the ones you wanted to bring him?”</p>
<p>Sakura frowns a bit. “Maybe…but I’m not really sure which ones would be best. It doesn’t have to be a lot, just a few to remind him I’m still thinking about him and wishing him well, even when I’m not there…”</p>
<p>Ino hums as she goes through her mental list for a moment, then brightens and takes Sakura’s hand. “I know just the ones!” She pulls her to her feet and across the way. “Come with me!”</p>
<p>About five minutes later, Ino has a small, but pretty bunch of flowers for Sakura all ready to go, tied carefully together with an orange bow. “<em>Wow</em>, Ino! These look great!”</p>
<p>The part-time florist beams with pride. “Why, thank you! I try! <em>Especially</em> when it’s for our resident sunshine!” Crossing her arms over her chest, she sighs. “I wish I could go, too… Between working here and doing random missions with Choji and some of the others, I haven’t been able to go see him at all…”</p>
<p>“Then why don’t I take over for the rest of the day?”</p>
<p>Ino and Sakura turn at the new voice coming from the shop’s doorway, and the blonde lights up when she sees who it is. He must have come through the back. “Dad! You’re home early!”</p>
<p>Hurrying over, she hugs her father tightly, who laughs and hugs her right back. “I missed you, too.” Dropping a kiss to the top of her head as they separate, Inoichi nods politely Sakura’s way. “Good morning, Sakura! Nice to see you again! It’s been a while!”</p>
<p>Sakura dips her head in turn, a small smile on her face. “G-good morning, sir. Yes, it has. It’s nice to see you, too.”</p>
<p>Inoichi blinks for a moment at that first part before laughing out loud, reaching over to ruffle Sakura’s hair gently. “I appreciate the respect, dear, but I’ve known you since you were barely at my knee. Just ‘Inoichi’ is fine, remember?”</p>
<p>Sakura flushes at that, having forgotten since it’s been so long (between her missions and his work, they don’t see each other terribly often), but nods anyway. “Y-yes, s—I-I mean, I-Inoichi. Thank you.”</p>
<p>He nods. Then, glancing between the two girls, he asks, “Now, what’s this I hear about Naruto?”</p>
<p>Ino looks up at him with so much joy in her expression that it almost brings tears to Sakura’s eyes. “Naruto finally woke up, Dad! Just over a week ago now! Isn’t it great?!” She sighs heavily with relief all over again. “I was so worried…!”</p>
<p>Like a switch is flipped, her father softens. “I know you were, sweetheart.” He takes a deep breath himself. “To be honest, I was, too, and I know it’s the same for a lot of people in this village.” Rubbing the back of his head, he chuckles. “That boy’s sure turned us into devoted worrywarts, huh?”</p>
<p>Sakura chuckles and smiles fondly. “He sure has!”</p>
<p>Ino snorts. “You’ve got that right!”</p>
<p>The older man chuckles, then makes a shooing motion in the general direction of the hospital. “So, why don’t you two get out of here, go see him together? I’m sure he’d appreciate the company!”</p>
<p>Ino blinks. “B-but I’ve still got a few hours left of my—!”</p>
<p>Inoichi holds up a hand and shakes his head, a small smile on his face. “Now, Ino, what have I taught you?”</p>
<p>Ino tilts her head. “About what, Papa?”</p>
<p>“About what’s important. Your mother and I are the ones who make your shift schedule, and normally, we have you stick to it to help you maintain your sense of responsibility off-mission.” His smile grows. “<em>But</em> your friend just woke up from what was basically a coma, honey. You know how much he loves you and all your other friends, so I’m sure he’s been eagerly waiting for you to visit him.”</p>
<p>Ino blinks as what he’s saying sinks in, and she smiles warmly. She can picture Naruto waiting for all of them in her mind’s eye, affection curing in her chest. “I see. You’re right.”</p>
<p>Inoichi’s smile widens. “Plus, you’ve been working here and on missions quite a bit lately since Naruto <em>and</em> Shikamaru are out of commission and some of your other friends are out tracking Sasuke or on training missions of their own. You deserve the break, and since I’m home early for the day, I don’t mind taking over this once.” Another thought crossing his mind, he laughs while scratching the back of his head. “Besides, if Shikaku and Choza found out I didn’t let you go see Naruto the first chance I could, they’d have my head! Their boys really do adore that knucklehead something fierce…” he laughs a little more, “…<em>especially</em> that Shikamaru.” Ruminating on that a moment, he warms and whistles appreciatively. “To be so incredibly loved by one of the Leaf’s most promising shinobi at that age…and, hell, to know it’s so wholeheartedly returned…” Breathing a laugh, there’s something impossibly fond and almost proud, maybe even a touch nostalgic, in his expression. “Shikamaru and Naruto are lucky to have found each other…”</p>
<p>Ino softens right along with him. “You’re not wrong. Those two’ve always been drawn to each other,” she giggles, “even if they’re only just starting to realize what it means.”</p>
<p>Sakura has only just become aware of the strong bond between Naruto and Shikamaru and how deep it really goes, but she doesn’t miss the significance of what they’re saying either. She looks toward the hospital, where Naruto and Shikamaru are no doubt still joined at the hip. What they have really is special…must be, if even Inoichi is moved by it.</p>
<p>Inoichi gently turns Ino around to untie her apron and throw it on himself. “So you two go have fun, and your mother and I will see you whenever you get back, all right?”</p>
<p>The younger Yamanaka launches herself at him again, this hug tighter than the last. “Thanks, Dad! You’re the best!”</p>
<p>Inoichi gladly returns the embrace with a chuckle. “You’re welcome, love.” Pulling back, he asks, having already seen the flowers in Sakura’s hand, “I’m sure you want to bring something, too, right?”</p>
<p>Ino nods confidently, grinning from ear to ear. “Yep! I know just the thing!”</p>
<p>Sakura’s about to point out that Ino just had her deliver flowers a few days ago, but thinks better of it. She’s sure Ino knows what she’s doing. A few minutes later, Ino has her own small bunch of specially-picked flowers, tied with a blue bow that matches Naruto’s eyes, just like last time. “All right, I’m all set!” She turns to beam at Sakura. “Ready to go see our boy?”</p>
<p>Sakura blinks at the new nickname before she brightens even more. She nods. “You bet!”</p><hr/>
<p>When the girls arrive, they find they’re not the only ones who decided to visit today.</p>
<p>“Oh! Hey, Sai!”</p>
<p>Said ex-Root ANBU member looks up at the greeting, and he offers a small smile, raising a hand. “Good morning, Sakura, Ino!” Tilting his head, he chuckles. “It seems the three of us were on the same wavelength.”</p>
<p>Both girls laugh. “Looks like it!”</p>
<p>“Hey, Ino! Hey, Sakura! Long time, no see!”</p>
<p>They look over to see Naruto waving like crazy and smiling like the sun. It’s enough to make Sakura soften and get Ino choked up. Just like they knew he’d be, Shikamaru is sitting right by his side, lazily leaning over on his legs. He smiles, tossing a knowing glance Ino’s way, and waves just the once. “Mornin’, you two. Looks like we’ve got a little party goin’ on today.”</p>
<p>Naruto laughs delightedly. “Yeah! Isn’t it great?” He turns back to look at his fellow blonde. “Hey, Ino—”</p>
<p>He cuts himself off, startled at the tears in her eyes and the way she’s sniffling. His eyes widen, and he waves pacifying hands in front of him. “W-whoa, whoa, hey! What’s the matter? Did I say something wrong?”</p>
<p>Ino answers with an embrace that’s probably too tight, but right now, she doesn’t care. He half-deserves it. “You <em>scared me</em>, you idiot!” she reprimands, teary voice somewhere between normal volume and a yell. Naruto winces, but doesn’t protest, slowly reaching up to hug her back. He had a feeling it was probably this… “One minute, you’re leaving to go after Sasuke again, and the next, you come home practically in a <em>body bag</em>!” The others flinch at the almost-true imagery, but she’s not wrong. Ino certainly has a way with words… “And that’s not even the worst part! You were basically in a freaking <em>coma</em> for almost two weeks, so I couldn’t even make sure you were okay in here, too!” She presses a few fingers into his right shoulder blade, and Naruto knows she means his heart. “Shikamaru and Choji were worrying themselves sick—” she can feel the former’s unimpressed glare, but he’s just gonna have to deal with it, “—Sakura wouldn’t talk to anyone or leave her house, and everyone else has been on missions or training, so I couldn’t even take care of anyone!” Those close to her know that’s how she best deals with stress, by making sure those close to her are well cared for.</p>
<p>She gives herself a few moments to calm down. Her hand slowly comes up to cradle the back of his head, and her voice is softer and a little quieter when she starts up again. “You were reckless and hardhead and stupid enough to almost get yourself <em>killed</em>…”</p>
<p>Naruto nods into her shoulder, feeling guilty and loved in one. It’s a confusing, but somehow still nice combination. “Yeah, I know,” he returns quietly, nuzzling into her shoulder a tiny bit. “I’m sorry I worried you so much. I never meant to worry anyone, I swear.”</p>
<p>She revels in his nuzzling, finding it adorable as hell, but after a few beats of comfortable, companionable silence, she slowly pulls back to cup his cheek. Her expression is so soft and her eyes so kind that it steals his breath. She’s looking at him like he’s…someone precious, someone she’d never want to lose… Naruto’s heart pounds in his chest, cheeks dusting a light pink. “But you were also ridiculously selfless and protective and sweet and…” her smile grows despite herself, “…a lot of conflicting things that make it really hard to stay mad at you, you know that?”</p>
<p>Naruto blushes a little more and looks away with a shy chuckle, scratching his cheek. “I-I don’t know about that… I-I just wanted to protect my friends and…” he winces again, a shadow passing over his eyes, “…stop Sasuke, if I could…”</p>
<p>Ino just shakes her head and sighs. Reaching out to take his chin in gentle fingers and bring his eyes back to her, she gives him a helpless smile. “Well, next time, do you think you could do it <em>without</em> almost dying on us?”</p>
<p>Naruto rubs the back of his head and smiles sheepishly. Shikamaru’s relieved to see the shadow gone from his bright-again eyes. “Hey, if I have my way, there won’t <em>be</em> a next time, so hopefully you won’t have to worry about me anymore, okay?”</p>
<p>Ino snorts and ruffles his hair semi-roughly. “Yeah, yeah!” Letting him up, she raises a pointer finger, a suddenly stern expression on her face. “But you’d <em>better</em> keep to that or else, you hear me?”</p>
<p>Even as he raises his hands in his own defense (he doesn’t have a death wish, after all), he nods firmly, resolve overtaking him. “Don’t worry, I will! I promise!”</p>
<p>Relenting, Ino lets out a cleansing exhale. “Good.” Looking at him a little more softly, she tells him, “I already know about your Sasuke decision through Sakura, so you don’t have to explain anything about it to me, okay?” Tapping under his chin with two gently-curled fingers in a ‘chin up’ gesture, she melts further. “For the record, I think it’s the right choice, without a doubt. Chasing Sasuke was…it was never healthy for you. You’ve always deserved better. You still do. So when Sakura told me, I was so relieved and happy and proud. I still am.”</p>
<p>Naruto was waiting for her answer on bated breath, and now it’s his turn to breathe a sigh of relief. Granny Tsunade already told him Ino knew the other day, but still. He’s just glad she’s not upset. That’s one fewer friend he has to tell, at least. Not that he wants to shirk that responsibility, it’s just…it’s a little weight off his shoulders, that’s all. A little less weight on his heart, too. Shikamaru can see the lighter air about him already, and he’s grateful. Naruto smiles softly. “Thanks, Ino. I really appreciate that. I’m really happy you’re okay with what I decided, too.”</p>
<p>Ino winks and flashes an A-okay sign. “<em>More</em> than okay. I know how you are about promises, too, so I know I can trust you at your word.” Leaning forward, she kisses his cheek. “Great job, Naruto!”</p>
<p>Naruto turns bright red instantly and has to look away for fear of turning into a puddle of goo. “Y-you’re welcome…!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru barely contains his laughter behind his hand, while Sakura has no such reservations, throwing her head back to laugh out loud, and Shikamaru soon loses his battle to join her. Even Sai is quietly chuckling, and a lightly-blushing Ino soon follows. All of it just makes Naruto turn even redder, <em>if</em> that’s possible.</p>
<p>Once everyone’s done poking fun, Ino remembers what they brought with them and waves Sakura over. They each hold up their chosen flowers. “These are for you, Naruto! Since we were coming by already, we figured we should bring you something to keep your spirits up!”</p>
<p>Naruto’s eyes light up. “Oh, <em>wow</em>! Thanks so much, you guys!” He takes both bunches in his hands to get a better look and is practically buzzing with excitement. “These are just as beautiful as the last ones! I love them! I know I already said thank you, but I mean it! You’re the best!”</p>
<p>Ino can’t help but laugh fondly, Shikamaru and Sakura finding it just as sweet and adorable. He really is so cute… Sai, meanwhile, is trying to figure out why his relationships book only mentioned girls getting flowers when, apparently, boys really like them, too. Is his book secretly sexist, perhaps? Maybe he should find a different one…</p>
<p>The mind jutsu user waves a hand. “Don’t mention it! It’s the least we can do!” She means that, too, more than he knows. She wishes she could do more, but she doesn’t think her medical ninjutsu would do too much good. She’s decent at it, sure, enough to help on the battlefield, but nowhere near Sakura or Lady Tsunade’s level. Taking the flowers from him gently, she replaces the dying bouquet Sakura gave him for her days ago with the new bunches, making them look presentable while Sakura makes her way over.</p>
<p>She’s been quiet to let Ino get her time in, but she’s been wanting to check on him, too. She blushes slightly when she remembers waking up next to him the other day, her face pressed against his chest and his arm around her. She smiles shyly. “H-hey, Naruto! You’re looking better today!” It’s true. He looks a lot more like himself, more lively and full of life, than he did before Gaara and his siblings’ visit. She’s relieved. He looked so…despondent the other night… Her eyes are drawn to his right arm, and her smile grows. “Oh, good! Lady Tsunade told me you got your binding-cast off! I’m so glad!”</p>
<p>Naruto nods and grins toothily, rotating his shoulder to show her he can move it just fine. “Yep! It feels great! Granny sure is amazing!” Then, because he’s him and she should have known he was going to turn things around on her, he takes her in, too, and asks softly, trying to give her the illusion of privacy (even though the others already know how she was until a few days ago), “What about you, Sakura? How’ve you been? Okay?”</p>
<p>Breathing a laugh at her ridiculous teammate, she nods. “Much better, thank you. Sleeping, especially. Ever since I slept here with you guys, nights are a lot more peaceful. Some nightmares still come,” and part of her thinks they always might; she knows Kakashi-sensei still has nightmares, after all, “but a lot less frequently. Mom and Dad are really happy and relieved, too.”</p>
<p>She doesn’t mention her lack of appetite, Shikamaru notices, but she definitely looks better, more color to her cheeks, lighter and smaller bags under her eyes, and her cheeks are already a little less sunken in, so logic tells him that’s better, too. Good. He knows Naruto would have worried about that. He’s sure the other boy notices with how observant he is when it comes to his friends, but just in case, he’ll run it by him later.</p>
<p>Sakura takes a cleansing breath, and her expression falls tender, if a touch regretful, too. “Honestly, I feel…better than I have in a long time. Years, maybe. Maybe since…even before Sasuke left the village.” Naruto’s eyes widen. He’d ask what she means, but he figures she’s about to explain. She moves a hand to her chest. “I didn’t realize it until the other night, but…there’s been a hollowness in me for a long time, looking to be filled. I think a part of me thought romance was what I was missing.” She laughs at herself. “Not that I really knew anything about it at twelve, but still…”</p>
<p>Cheeks coloring some, she smiles over at Naruto again. “But after sleeping next to you the other night…I think I finally realized I’m looking for more than that. A purpose bigger than just being Sasuke’s girlfriend.” She grimaces. It sounds so superficial and shallow now, even to her own ears. “I’m not quite sure what it is yet – there’s so much I want to do and so many people I want to help and save, and I still want to continue cultivating my skills, too – but I can feel it waiting for me. It’s so big, I can’t even see it yet.” Feeling more sure of herself than she has in what feels like forever, her smile turns bright. “Honestly? I’m excited!”</p>
<p>Naruto grins right back. “That’s awesome, Sakura! I’m really happy for you!”</p>
<p>She blushes a bit. “T-thanks, Naruto.” She softens. And once she does realize whatever purpose she finds…she knows she’ll have Naruto to thank for it. He’s the one who woke her up. If it weren’t for him… Well, she’s grateful. She’s not sure he’ll ever understand how much. “Me, too.”</p>
<p>“Sounds like you came to a pretty big realization,” Shikamaru comments. He glances at Naruto, and Sakura doesn’t miss the way his gaze goes soft. He can relate, most definitely. “I’m happy for you, too.”</p>
<p>She beams. “Thanks, Shikamaru!”</p>
<p>“Well, if you wanted to start off on the right foot, Sakura, you sure aced it!” Ino says, and Sakura raises an eyebrow. The blonde points at her while she sits back down at Naruto’s side, flowers perfectly arranged in the vase on the nightstand. “The only reason I got to come see you today is because Sakura stopped by our shop. When my Dad overheard you were awake, he took over the rest of my shift for me.”</p>
<p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and he blinks. “Wait, your Dad? You mean Mr. Inoichi, right?” He tries to think back. “Blond hair that’s darker than yours,” he motions down his back, “in a really long ponytail?”</p>
<p>Ino barks a laugh. “He would <em>die </em>if he heard you call him that!” She snorts at the very idea of his face. Shikamaru also chuckles, having known the man since before he could walk. “But yes, that’s him!” Her eyes go far away for a moment as she remembers something, voice going soft and sacred. “He’s always liked you, you know.”</p>
<p>The blond’s eyes grow to the size of saucers. “W-wait, what? He has? But…” he combs through his memory again, scratching his head, “…I can’t think of a time we’ve even had a conversation. We’ve only been in the same room together, like, once or twice, I think.” He looks at Ino like a lost kid, tilting his head. “So…how could he?”</p>
<p>Ino waits a few seconds to make sure he’s serious. When she sees he is, she melts a little more, her expression a bit sad, too. He really is so very unaware of the effect he has on people… She reaches out to poke the star of his face gently. “You dummy…” He stares. Her voice is so warm… “You don’t have to <em>meet</em> someone for them to know your heart.” She pokes Naruto’s own heart twice for good measure. “My Dad’s been around a long time, he’s one of the best shinobi in this village, and he’s been able to watch you grow in ways I haven’t. So if he says he likes you, then he does. Just trust him, okay?”</p>
<p>He rubs his chest where she poked him thoughtfully. “Yeah, okay… I get that part, I guess, but…I still don’t understand why…”</p>
<p>Sighing a bit, she thinks back to what she remembered before. “Well…for instance, when I was little and we were in the Academy together,” she looks away, ashamed, “I’d…complain about you to my parents a lot. I’d come home and say things like, ‘Naruto pranked the teacher and disrupted class again!’ or ‘Naruto’s so obnoxious! I can’t stand him!’” She wilts at the memories, looking back at Naruto apologetically. “Sorry…”</p>
<p>But instead of being offended or upset, Naruto just chuckles with a wide, toothy grin. “Don’t be!” He links his fingers behind his head. “It’s not like I exactly made it <em>easy</em> for you guys to like me back then!”</p>
<p>Ino’s gaze flicks to Shikamaru (always the exception with Naruto, it seems), and she sighs. “I guess… You had your reasons, though…” He shrugs, and she presses, “As long as you’re not mad or hurt…”</p>
<p>His smile just widens. “No way!” He makes the mark of an ‘x’ over his heart. “Promise! No hard feelings!”</p>
<p>She breathes a heavy sigh of relief. “Thank goodness…! Thanks, Naruto.” Clearing her throat, she goes on. “A-anyway, my Dad always stood up for you. He couldn’t get specific, for obvious reasons, but he did his best. He told me to try to see it from your point of view, that it was the only way for you to get attention from anyone. You didn’t care whether it was good or bad attention as long as they were acknowledging you.” She shrugs lightly. “It didn’t make sense to me then. I thought, even if you didn’t have parents, you must have <em>someone</em> to care for you who should be teaching you how to behave, you know? It didn’t really occur to me that you’d be <em>all</em> alone…”</p>
<p>She still kicks herself for that all the time, mostly every time she sees Naruto do something a parent usually teaches their child. Like saying the everyday please and thank you, letting an old lady have his seat at Ichiraku Ramen, or even gently reminding a child it’s not okay to take things that aren’t theirs. Those things seem so small and insignificant and <em>normal</em> to most people, and for all intents and purposes, they <em>are</em>, but…Naruto didn’t have parents around to teach him that stuff. He didn’t have <em>anyone</em> to teach him <em>anything</em>. He had to figure it out all on his own. Some things, she wonders how he figured it out at all, like reading and writing. They don’t teach that stuff at the Academy… Honestly, she wants to ask him, at least someday, but for now, she lets it rest. It’s not the right time.<br/>
<br/>
“A-anyway…” her gaze drifts back to Naruto, soft as a clear blue sky, “…I didn’t understand anything back then, but I do now, and I’m really happy I do.” She beams. ”Otherwise, I wouldn’t know how amazing you are!”</p>
<p>Naruto flushes brightly and stares. He can’t help it. This is news to him. He’s always thought Ino was really cool, minus the Sasuke rivalry with Sakura, but that was years ago and she’s grown past that, grown up, and in his opinion, she’s so much better for it in a lot of ways. That’s exactly what he’s trying to do, too.</p>
<p>Looking away, he smiles shyly. “I-I don’t know if I’d call me ‘amazing’ or anything like that...” He glances back at her. “If anything, I’ve always thought <em>you</em> were the cool one!”</p>
<p>It’s Ino’s turn to blush. “M-me? Really?”</p>
<p>Naruto nods. “Uh-huh. You’re really pretty and popular, your jutsu are so cool, you’re incredible with flowers and plants, you have to be really smart to learn your jutsu <em>and</em> all that flower stuff, <em>and</em> you’re really nice, too! You’re like…” he tilts his head, “…what do they call it…?” He grins. “The ‘whole package’ or somethin’?”</p>
<p>Ino’s blush turns fierce while Sakura laughs. Shikamaru, also chuckling, takes mercy on a confused Naruto and Sai. “That turn of phrase is <em>usually</em> reserved for dating purposes, just so you’re aware.”</p>
<p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and his blush comes back full force, waving his hands in front of him. “I-I didn’t mean it like that, I swear!” Then, realizing how <em>that</em> might sound, he stiffens. “<em>Uh</em>—! Not that I—I mean—!” He facepalms and scrubs his hand down his face. “You know what I mean, right?”</p>
<p>Ino laughs, the last of her blush fading. She waves off his concern. “Y-yeah, don’t worry, I get it.” All the same, she’s still so flattered, and she smiles at him warmly. “Thanks, Naruto. You’re sweet!”</p>
<p>Naruto sighs in relief and grins. “Of course!”</p>
<p>The lighter blonde then remembers she and Sakura weren’t the first ones here and sheepishly turns to Sai. “Sorry, Sai. We kinda hijacked your time with Naruto, didn’t we?”</p>
<p>Sai blinks and tilts his head. “Hmm?” Then, understanding what she means, he chuckles and smiles. “Oh, no, don’t worry. I like learning about everyone. I didn’t get to grow up with all of you, so I find all of this very interesting. I don’t mind at all.”</p>
<p>Ino perks up. “Oh, good! Glad to hear it!” She winks. “If you have any questions, just ask! We’ll tell ya anything you wanna know!”</p>
<p>Sai hums thoughtfully, curling his fingers at his chin. “Well, in that case…” He reaches into one of the pouches on his belt to produce several different colors of nail polish. Shikamaru wonders how he stashed so many in that small pack. Sai just grins. “I’ve read that painting friends’ nails while making conversation is a great way to bond! I’ve been practicing my nail art recently for such an opportunity!”</p>
<p>Sakura zeroes in on the pink one. “It’s the perfect shade to match my hair!”</p>
<p>Ino claims the purple. “And my outfit!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru’s eyebrow twitches. “I think that’s more <em>sleepovers</em> you’re thinking of, Sai…namely <em>girl</em> sleepovers…” And based on his expression with the flowers earlier… “Are you sure you got the right relationships book, man?” He smirks and chuckles teasingly. “Maybe you picked up one of Master Jiraiya’s books by mistake…”</p>
<p>Naruto laughs quietly, the ache in his chest fond. “Nah, that’s not one of Pervy Sage’s.” He goes soft. “He used to make me read his manuscripts when we were on the road, and there wasn’t anything like that in there.” He breathes another laugh, softer and full of nostaglia. “That would have been enjoyable, at least.” He means no offense, of course. Aside from Pervy Sage’s first novel, <em>Tales of a Gutsy Ninja</em>, his namesake, his other books just aren’t his thing. Pervy Sage would understand, no matter how much he feigned hurt or teased otherwise.</p>
<p>“We used to paint each other’s nails at sleepovers all the time when we were kids!” Sakura gushes. “Remember, Ino?”</p>
<p>“How could I forget?” Ino gazes down at the purple polish almost reverently, like it contains all of her childhood memories. “It’s been <em>forever</em>!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru sighs. Clearly, he’s getting nowhere. He looks to Naruto for help, but does a double-take when he sees him staring at all the colors with his eyes shining like that. Oh, boy… Well, there goes his last hope. The brunet gives in without a fight and nudges Naruto’s shoulder. His friend snaps out of his daze to look at him, and Shikamaru nods toward Sai. “Go on an’ ask ‘im,” he encourages quietly. “I’m sure he’d love to do yours, too.”</p>
<p>Naruto flushes at having been caught, but he just smiles shyly. “I’ll, uh…I’ll wait and see what he does with the girls first.” He rubs the back of his neck. “Then we’ll see if he’s up to doin’ me, too.”</p>
<p>Shikamaru shrugs and sits back. “All right. Whatever you say.”</p>
<p>He starts with Sakura first, at Ino’s behest. “She’s the reason I got to come, so it’s only fair.”</p>
<p>After making sure she’s certain, Sai brings out black polish and what Sakura swears is the lightest shade of pink possible, alongside the pink she already chose. Raising an eyebrow, she asks, “What are those for, Sai?”</p>
<p>Sai’s happy grin just grows. “You’ll see,” he sing-songs. He’s always wanted to try this! “I really think you’ll like this.” He starts unscrewing the light pink bottle. “If not, I’ll do it over however you want. <em>But</em>,” he raises his index finger, the other fingers and thumb holding the brush-cap, “no peeking. Deal?”</p>
<p>Sakura is surprised at his playfulness, but she trusts that Sai knows what he’s doing. Plus, he’s right. It will be more fun this way. She smiles. “Deal!”</p>
<p>She closes her eyes, and he sets to work. He’s pretty fast and efficient for not doing this long, but Shikamaru figures he’s just got a knack for art in general. He’s never been the artsy type himself – the closest he gets is drawing out battle plans or, when they were kids, making shadow animals for Choji – but he can still appreciate Sai’s immense talent for it. And if he can bring it to his friends in a non-combat fashion? He thinks that’s a step in the right direction for him. He could use more hobbies that aren’t combat-related.</p>
<p>While he paints, he asks questions about what growing up with everyone was like, and they’re all more than happy to fill him in. Naruto’s pranks are a fun subject. Shikamaru knows more about those than most.</p>
<p>Once he’s done about seven minutes later, he announces, “Finished!” Opening her eyes, he smiles pretty brightly for him and offers something of an A-okay sign with the hand still holding the brush-cap, his other hand open, too.</p>
<p>Taking that as her cue to look, she gasps and beams. “Oh, Sai, they’re so <em>pretty</em>!”</p>
<p>Ino peeks over her shoulder, and her reaction is much the same. “Oh, <em>wow</em>! They really are adorable!” She looks over at the older boy. “You’re really good, Sai!”</p>
<p>Sai blinks and then blushes at the praise, rubbing the back of his neck with a shy, overjoyed smile. “I-I just like art, that’s all…but thank you!” He looks back at Sakura. “I’m very happy you like them!”</p>
<p>“Hey, I wanna see!” Naruto calls.</p>
<p>Sakura turns, sheepish upon remembering. “Oh! Sorry, Naruto! See? Aren’t they amazing?”</p>
<p>Naruto squints for a moment, and then he lights up like the morning sun, a delighted laugh escaping. “Are those <em>cherry blossom trees</em>? That’s <em>so</em> <em>cool</em>!” His eyes slide to his artsy teammate. “You really are incredible, Sai!”</p>
<p>Sai turns even redder now, but he’s as happy as can be. “Thank you very much! I’m so glad you think so!”</p>
<p>Driven by his own rabid curiosity, Shikamaru looks over, too. His eyes widen. “<em>Wow</em>… That <em>is</em> pretty impressive, Sai.”</p>
<p>Ino raises her hand eagerly. “Ooh! Me next, please! Me next!”</p>
<p>Sai’s eyes widen at her enthusiasm, and he lets out an amused chuckle. “Yes, of course! You next, Miss Yamanaka!”</p>
<p>Ino’s heart skips at the playful nickname, and she finds she likes the sound of his laugh quite a lot. She hopes she can make him laugh more often. “S-should I close my eyes, too?”</p>
<p>Sai nods. “<em>If</em> you don’t mind.” He winks. “After all, there’s no fun in surprises if they’re spoiled, right?”</p>
<p>Ino grins and laughs herself, excitement filling her. “Right!”</p>
<p>He starts with the lightest shade of purple at his disposal, then goes to work on the rest with light green and Ino’s chosen purple. He’s a touch more detailed with hers, so it takes about ten minutes, but they pass the time by answering more of Sai’s questions and telling more hilarious stories.</p>
<p>When he tells her he’s done, she’s too excited to wait for the okay. She looks down immediately.</p>
<p>She brightens like flower petals in morning rays, and it does something to Sai’s heart he can’t explain.</p>
<p>Each nail has a different kind of purple flower. No two are the same. She squeals happily, and she swears, if he were comfortable with it, she’d hug him right now! “Oh, Sai, they’re <em>beautiful</em>! Thank you so much!” She takes another scan of her fingers. “I didn’t know you knew so many different kinds of flowers!” She swears she’s learning more about him all the time!</p>
<p>His cheeks color, and he looks to the side shyly, scratching his cheek. “A-actually, just in case an opportunity like this ever came up, I figured I should know what my comrades liked, so…I-I compiled idea lists for virtually everyone I work with.” He looks back at her, smile gentle. “For yours, I researched purple flowers. I figured that was my best bet.”</p>
<p>She beams. “Well, you were right! Thank you so much!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru laughs. “You mind showin’ Naruto, too, Ino?” He jerks a thumb his way, smirking adoringly. “I think he’s gonna combust with excitement over here.”</p>
<p>“Oh, sure! Sorry!”</p>
<p>Ino shows him, and his eyes widen and shine even more than before. “Now that’s just unfair!” he comments, grinning with immense pride as he rubs the bridge of his nose. “Why do I get all the super cool teammates?”</p>
<p>Sakura smiles proudly, while Shikamaru huff-laughs and smirks and Ino chuckles. It’s so cute and awe-inspiring, how much he loves them (how much they love <em>him</em>, too). It takes Sai a moment to understand that it’s a compliment, but when he does, he smiles even more than before, a lot for him. There’s a happy pink staining his cheeks. “T-thank you very much, Naruto!”</p>
<p>Naruto offers a thumbs up. “No problem! It’s the truth, after all!”</p>
<p>Putting away the supplies he’s used, Sai looks between the two boys and asks, holding up a few colors he thinks they’d like, “Would either of you like me to paint your nails, too?”</p>
<p>Shikamaru holds up his hands. “No, thanks. Not really my thing.”</p>
<p>Naruto, on the other hand, is practically glowing with stars in his eyes. Hell, Shikamaru’s pretty sure he sees hopeful <em>tears</em>. “I’ve never had my nails painted before…!” he says softly, so very wistfully.</p>
<p>Sakura and Ino’s mouths drop open. “Wait, for real? <em>Never</em>?” Normally, they wouldn’t question it, but he seems so excited, they’re sure he would’ve been the same way as a kid.</p>
<p>Naruto shrugs. “Well, yeah. I mean,” he rubs the back of his head, grinning sheepishly, “I’ve never been to a sleepover either, so…”</p>
<p>The girls wince. Right… For a second, they forgot. Shikamaru, however, just smirks and ruffles his hair, making him laugh. “Well, we’ll just have to fix that once you’re out of here, won’t we? We’ll invite all the guys over,” he winks Sakura and Ino’s way, “the girls, too, if they’re okay with that.”</p>
<p>Both girls beam and discreetly flash thumbs up. They’re on it! Just leave it to them! They’re <em>sure</em> the others will be on board, so they’ll make sure it’s the sleepover to end all sleepovers!</p>
<p>Naruto looks at him like he’s hung the damn stars in the sky, the moon besides. “Really? You mean it, Shikamaru?”</p>
<p>The older boy’s smirk just widens, a soft edge to it. “Of course I mean it. You know I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t.”</p>
<p>Somehow, he’s not surprised at all when Naruto lunges forward to hug him tightly. Shikamaru gathers him close in turn, closing his eyes and burying his face in the crook between his shoulder and neck. He wishes he could give him everything he missed out on unfairly as a kid, but gestures like this will have to do. He’ll do his best to make sure they’re the best, just like Naruto deserves. Witnessing this makes their friends feel warm and soft as well. They really are so good for each other… “<em>Thank you</em>, Shikamaru…” he whispers.</p>
<p>The shadow wielder breathes a tender laugh. “Any time.”</p>
<p>They separate, and it’s at that moment a newcomer flashes into the room. “I thought this might be a good time to check on my favorite knuckleheaded student,” he glances around, “<em>but</em> it seems I’ve interrupted a little party instead. My bad!”</p>
<p>Naruto beams excitedly. “Kakashi-sensei!”</p>
<p>Sakura is next to greet him, bowing her head politely. “Good afternoon, sensei!”</p>
<p>Sai stands a little straighter, but doesn’t bother to hide his amusement for once as he holds up this afternoon’s weapon of choice. “Hello, sensei.”</p>
<p>Ino and Shikamaru greet him, too, and Kakashi’s smile grows. “Afternoon, kids! Now, what’s this I hear about a sleepover? And…” he sniffs the air, “…is that nail polish I smell?”</p>
<p>The girls gleefully show him their nails. “Uh-huh! Look, sensei! Sai painted them! Isn’t he great?”</p>
<p>Kakashi leans in to study them. “<em>Ooh</em>...! Those are very nice!” He gives Sai a thumbs up. “Good work, Sai!”</p>
<p>Sai grins and blushes at the praise. “T-thank you, sensei.” Shifting his colors around in thought, he nods his head toward his teammate. “I was just about to paint Naruto’s, but I could do yours afterward, if you’d like!”</p>
<p>Raising his hands, Kakashi gives a nervous laugh. “N-no, thank you. I appreciate the offer, but I feel like it’ll clash with my image…”</p>
<p>Shikamaru snickers, nudging Naruto playfully. “Yeah, ‘cause <em>some</em> of us have reputations to uphold.”</p>
<p>Naruto pshaws. “Reputation, schmeputation!” He grins like a kid in a candy store, eyes lighting up again. “I want cool nails, too!”</p>
<p>His sensei and friends laugh (honestly, that’s so like him), and once his eyes are closed, Sai sets to work. This time, Sai gets to hear about the more elaborate pranks Naruto pulled. Everyone laughs, Sai the hardest of them all (Naruto’s heart <em>thrills</em> at that!), though the artist is careful not to mess up his work.</p>
<p>His calloused hands hold Naruto’s so gently, almost like he considers them, <em>him</em>, something precious, the blond can’t help but notice. It doesn’t escape Shikamaru’s keen eyes either, more so the confusion it leaves on Naruto’s face. His heart pangs in his chest, the love he has for this ridiculous ball of sunshine overflowing. Someday, Naruto… Someday, he swears they’ll make you see <em>just</em> how precious you are to all of them…</p>
<p>Sai’s chosen designs for Naruto are more elaborate, per se, more colors <em>and</em> more detailed, so they take longer, but about fifteen minutes later, Naruto can’t wait to open his eyes.</p>
<p>He’s not at all disappointed.</p>
<p>“<em>Whoa</em>…!” Naruto exclaims instantly, stars in his wide eyes. He practically cackles with glee. “<em>Holy crap</em>, Sai, these are <em>perfect</em>!” He looks over at him, happy, touched tears stinging his eyes. “Thank you so much!”</p>
<p>The others all crowd around to see, and they’re equally impressed, even Shikamaru and Kakashi. On his nails, one symbol for each, are Rasengans, bowls of ramen, the Uzumaki clan symbol, two of his Toad Summons (Gamakichi on one, Gamabunta on the other), and the <em>Naruto</em> ramen toppings.</p>
<p>Sai is a bit thrown to have caused such a strong reaction, but he’s guessing some of it has to do with his past and maybe his memories of Master Jiraiya. The smile he gives him is softer than the others, something more in it the others can’t quite place, but Naruto understands instantly. Seeing this, Sai just melts a touch more. “Of course. You’re more than welcome.”</p>
<p>Turning to Shikamaru, the pale boy offers his polish again. “Are you <em>sure</em> you don’t want to join in?” he asks, amusement coloring his tone. “I’ve thought of fun things for everyone!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru is about to politely decline again – he’s just happy to see Naruto happy, that’s all he ever wanted out of this –  but he stops when he sees Naruto still staring at his nails like they’re the most beautiful things he’s ever seen. His helpless smile comes without his say, a like laugh escaping, too, and then he turns back to Sai with a tiny sigh. “All right, fine…but nothin’ fancy. Just paint ‘em black, okay?”</p>
<p>Naruto turns to him with a thrilled gasp, and Shikamaru just softens further. “Now we’ll match. Kinda. In a way.” He shrugs. It’s the principle of the thing. “Happy?”</p>
<p>The blond smiles for all it’s worth (<em>everything</em> to those who love him). “’Course!” he chirps, laughing. “But I’m <em>always</em> happy when I’m with you!”</p>
<p>Shikamaru blinks, startled at the sudden admission, a light blush crossing his face. He knows it’s true, obviously, but still… Knowing something in his heart and having it confirmed out loud are two very different things. Given a moment to gather himself, he reaches over to bump his fist with Naruto’s just like this morning, winking for good measure. “Right back at ya.”</p>
<p>Shikamaru’s nails are so simple that it only takes a minute or two to do his, and then all the teens turn to Kakashi with mischief in their eyes. “Come on, Kakashi-sensei,” Naruto rallies in a bit of a sing-song, he and the girls showing him their nails. “We all did it! Now it’s your turn!”</p>
<p>Kakashi knows they mean well, but… He casts a weary glance at Shikamaru for help, but the brunet just smirks conspiratorially and parades his own black nails. Naruto is happy as can be at his side, and...oh, boy… Ultimately, that’s what does it. He has a feeling there are going to be a lot of times he’ll be unable to say no to his sensei’s son’s overjoyed face from here on out… Oh, well. If Shikamaru can do it for Naruto, he can, too. Besides, there are worse things. Luckily, he’s confident Naruto is mature enough now that he won’t take advantage, <em>if</em> he even realizes he has this power over him eventually…</p>
<p>He raises his hands, looking and sounding (playfully) defeated. “All right, all right… You win. But just black like Shikamaru, please. The last thing I need is Pakkun seeing his face on my nails and getting a big head.” Not that he’d ever tell his number one Ninja Hound that. He just likes to tease him.</p>
<p>Naruto cheers, the girls, too. “<em>Woohoo</em>! All right!”</p>
<p>“You go, Kakashi-sensei!”</p>
<p>The rest of the day is spent together, talking and laughing and having fun. It’s one of the best days Naruto has ever had.</p>
<p>Which, of course, automatically makes it one of Shikamaru’s, too.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Happy birthday to Shikamaru! Woohoo! I find it hilariously cool that I just happen to post on his birthday!</p>
<p>I love Inoichi! He's my favorite (living) parent after Shikaku! I hope I did him justice here! We'll see more of him later once Karin comes in! ;)</p>
<p>Also, I threw in a few blink-and-miss potential Sai/Ino hints (it's the only canon couple I, personally, accept, lol), but it's background AF and won't have any impact on the story, so if you don't ship them or just want to view them as a brOTP or whatever, hey, all power to you! Doesn't matter to me! I was just trying to develop their friendship, and that's what came out! lol. Hope that's okay with everyone!</p>
<p>The next chapter will feature a few Teams who've been away, so hope you're looking forward to that!</p>
<p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0012"><h2>12. Pack Dynamics</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Team Kurenai finally makes it back from their extended mission, and their first order of business is paying their favorite knucklehead a visit. Things get...livelier than expected.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p><i>Okay</i>! Real life crap kept delaying this chapter (including a double ear infection, pfft), but I am <i>finally</i> posting it! Originally, this chapter was over 15k (and counting) and had Team Kurenai <i>and</i> Team Gai's visits in one ('cause I didn't <i>think</i> I had enough ideas for them to fill two individual chapters, lol), but haha, <i>yeah</i>. I came up with more ideas while writing, and eventually, it just got too long and stressful, so I opted to cut it into two. lol. (Somehow that keeps happening. Pfft!) But this way, that means, more or less, everyone gets their own chapter with Naruto, which is nice, and it also means that virtually the entire next Team Gai chapter is already written, just needs editing and a few parts filled in, so that's cool!</p><p>I actually also <i>meant</i> to have this chapter up for Naruto's birthday last Saturday, and I <i>really</i> tried (seriously, I wrote, like, 7-9k in two days between work shifts trying to finish it, LMAO), but real life crap got in the way, so it's going up now! But the <i>intention</i> still stands! Have this late happy birthday tribute, Naruto, my beloved sunshine babe! (You deserved better than canon!) &lt;3</p><p>Speaking of tributes, time for inspiration thanks!</p><p>Thanks to <b>ShadowSpellchecker on AO3</b> for inspiring Team Kurenai's mission: "It just occurred to me that you haven't put team 8 in yet, then I realized... they are probably part of the group trying to hunt down Sasuke now." (Was a great idea, and I love how it tied in with ideas I already had!)</p><p>Thanks to <b>PierceHellAbove on FFN</b> for inspiring/building on some good Kiba-Naruto interaction: "Kiba's labeled Naruto as pack, though. So if he almost dies then Kiba's gonna be riled up for sure." (Worked perfectly with ideas I already had! Was surprised how big this section turned out! Haha!)</p><p>And thanks to <b>GreenHunter05 on our KidgeonPost Discord</b> for adding on to my Akamaru ideas: "Please let Akamaru sit on the bed besides Naruto not wanting to leave his side. …Kiba was doing it because he knows Akamaru only does that when one of the pack is hurt and he wants to make them feel better" (They're all so cute, and you know we agree on Naruto and Akamaru not interacting enough! Adorable!)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It’s around noon the next day when Naruto and Shikamaru hear hurried footsteps outside the door. But what really gets Naruto’s ears perking is the <em>pawsteps</em>, the swift click-clack of nails on tile. A smile starts even before anyone’s entered the room.</p><p>The door slides open, a flash of white bursts in, and the next thing he knows, Naruto’s drowning in dog kisses.</p><p>“H-hey, Akamaru!” he greets between licks and delighted laughs, petting the Ninja Dog with equally-excited fervor. He can hear Akamaru’s tail wagging like crazy and the worried, yet happy-relieved whines and yips that sneak out, too, and all of it just makes his heart overflow for the precious fluffball. Naruto can’t stop himself from throwing his arms around the huge dog’s neck and hugging him for all he’s worth, nuzzling into his fur. “I missed you, too, buddy! It’s so good to see you!”</p><p>Akamaru barks in agreement, gives a long whine, and then licks his temple slowly in a tenderer gesture. The difference doesn’t escape Naruto’s notice. Pulling back, he raises an eyebrow at Akamaru, a small “Hmm?” leaving him. Sadly, despite having a fellow canine in the Nine Tails sealed inside him, he can’t speak dog. That’d be helpful for moments like this.</p><p>There’s a huffed chuckle at the foot of his bed. “He’s trying to tell you how much he missed you and how worried he was, but mostly how happy he is you’re okay. Every night before bed while we were on our mission, he looked in this direction and whined.” Kiba did his best to reassure him every time, but it wasn’t easy when he was just as worried.</p><p>Naruto frowns at the news, not really registering who said it or his semi-clipped tone, just focused on Akamaru. “You were really that worried about me, boy?” Akamaru growl-whines almost indignantly this time, and Naruto doesn’t need anyone to translate to tell he’s being reprimanded. Effectively chagrined, he smiles sheepishly and raises one of his hands in his own defense, the other still scratching behind one of Akamaru’s ears. “A-all right, my bad, I get it.” He takes the dog’s huge face in his hands and leans forward till their foreheads are touching, smile turning sweet as his voice drops. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you that much, I swear. You think you can forgive me? I don’t mind if it takes a while.”</p><p>Akamaru barks, bright and clear, tail wagging. “I’m guessing that’s a yes?” Another bark with a playful growl this time, and Naruto sighs in relief. “That’s great! Thanks, Akamaru!”</p><p>Barking excitedly once more and licking him a few more times for good measure, Akamaru hunkers down to rest his head in Naruto’s lap. Naruto is a little confused by the action, but he’s certainly not complaining. If anything, it makes him feel special. He happily pets him and scratches behind his ears.</p><p>At their side, Shikamaru watches cautiously. “Careful, Akamaru. Naruto’s legs are probably his weakest point right now.” Akamaru makes a noise of acknowledgment and just rubs his face gently, almost empathetically, against Naruto’s stomach. It’s the tiniest bit painful with the bruises there, but Naruto doesn’t mind. He just softens and ups the ante with his pets.</p><p>Footsteps come closer, and Naruto looks up. His face breaks into a wide smile when he sees who it is, who’s with him, too. “Oh, hey, Kiba! Hi, Hinata, Shino!” Leaning back against the pillows some, he chuckles contentedly. “It’s been a while! How are you guys? You were on some kinda mission till now, right? Everything go okay?”</p><p>Shino and Hinata are about to reply, but knuckles crack instead, and they turn to their teammate. Akamaru eyes his master warily, ears slowly folding back. Kiba has his head down and fists clenched so hard that they’re white-knuckled and shaking. One of his fangs breaks the skin of his lip. “You <em>really</em> have the balls to ask us that after what you pulled?”</p><p>“Huh?”</p><p>Kiba lifts his head a bit, and Naruto gets a good look at his face for the first time. His stomach drops. He’s reminded heavily of his confrontation with Sakura. Oh, boy… He can tell Shikamaru’s noticed, too, even before he did, just from the changed position of his feet and hands, muscles poised to move at any second, eyes trained squarely on Kiba.</p><p>Naruto just hopes it doesn’t come to that.</p><p>“K-Kiba, you okay? You look kinda—?!”</p><p>There’s a flash of black and brown, and as it turns out, his hoping doesn’t amount to much.</p><p>Kiba grabs Naruto by his collar and brings him in close, their noses inches apart. “<em>No</em>, I’m not okay, you idiot!” He shakes him roughly, enough to make his head loll back and forth and the room spin. “You scared the <em>shit</em> out of us! We thought you were <em>dead</em>!”</p><p>Akamaru yelps, Shino’s eyebrows shoot to his hairline, and Hinata gasps. “K-Kiba!”</p><p>Shikamaru is there in a second, trying to pry his hands off of Naruto. “Kiba, that’s enough!”</p><p>Kiba barely hears them, hardly feels Shikamaru’s fingers digging into his skin. His still-short claws rip Naruto’s hospital gown. “When Kakashi and Sakura ran by with you on his dogs’ backs, you were pale as death and bleeding everywhere and barely breathing! I could <em>smell</em> how much blood you’d lost, you stupid bastard!”</p><p>Shino and Hinata join Shikamaru, take his place, do their best to pull Kiba back. Akamaru takes a mouthful of his owner’s jacket and tugs forcefully to try to help. What the hell does he think he’s <em>doing</em>?!</p><p>“Shikamaru’s right, Kiba! Let him <em>go</em>! This isn’t what we came here to do!”</p><p>“Hinata’s right. That’s because we came here to <em>check</em> on Naruto, not hurt him more!”</p><p>Kiba doesn’t pay them any mind, his animal instincts tunnel-focused entirely on the rage and fear and worry of the last few weeks. He pulls Naruto even closer, so close the other can see the tears in his eyes. “Do you have <em>any</em> idea what that’s like?!” he snarls, honestly does, sounding more like an actual wild dog or wolf than Naruto’s ever heard. His eyes look just like a mad wolf’s, too, wild and crazed, but the blond can’t make himself look away. “Can you even comprehend how <em>terrifying </em>that was for us?!”</p><p>
  <em>Fwip!</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Fwwt!</em>
</p><p>Before things can escalate any further, shadows root themselves between Kiba’s hands and Naruto’s hospital gown and break his grip on the blond admittedly roughly, letting Shikamaru slip between his friend and his charge to land a blow on Kiba’s chest, just hard enough to send him stumbling back into his teammates.</p><p>“I <em>said</em>,” the Nara’s voice is dark and threatening, and combined with his royally pissed off glare, it’s enough to make any retort Kiba might’ve had die in his throat, “that’s <em>enough</em>.”</p><p>Once he makes sure Kiba isn’t going to try anything else, that Hinata and Shino have him, Shikamaru turns his back to give Naruto his full, undivided attention.</p><p>Naruto, who’s pale and shaking like a leaf, wide blue eyes trained on the sheets, staring at nothing as a few beads of sweat roll down his face, one falling from his chin. He’s barely daring to breathe, though Shikamaru’s sure his heartbeat would be through the roof if he took his pulse right now, and the older boy curses inwardly when he sees the pinpricks of <em>tears</em> in his friend’s eyes.</p><p><em>Damn</em> <em>it</em>! This is just like with Sakura. He wasn’t quick enough to stop Kiba, even though he was watching, he was ready, he was <em>right</em> <em>there</em>. He’ll grudgingly give his more hotheaded comrades one thing: they’re quick as hell when they want to be.</p><p>Kiba sees it, too, how affected Naruto is, and Hinata and Shino aren’t blind either. It’s startling to them all. Kiba is the most taken aback by far.</p><p>Naruto… He’s never reacted to his more animalistic outbursts like this, or at least…he’s never taken it <em>this</em> badly… Although, now that he thinks about it, when they were younger and he’d get in his face, Naruto would always freeze up like that, eyes wide, breath hitched, hands so sweaty…and it only dawns on Kiba now that maybe he was subtly trying to get <em>away</em> the whole time. Hell, he remembers one time when Naruto actually <em>bit</em> him to get him off. He’d scramble to put some distance between them once he was let go, and if they were on a mission and he didn’t have the time or place to do that, he’d just go quiet and keep to himself. He would never talk much after that unless it was necessary.</p><p>Horrified, Kiba covers his mouth with a shaking hand. He thinks he might actually puke from the guilt and shame. <em>Shit</em>! He <em>really</em> messed up! How did he not put it together before?! He may not know all the nitty-gritty details of Naruto’s childhood like Shikamaru does, but over the years, he’s learned enough to keep an eye on him as he makes his way home after particularly tiring missions, makes sure to check on him at home from time to time with a sniff or two from the street below, watches anyone who gets close to Naruto like a hawk when it’s obvious the kid’s having a rough day. He should have <em>known</em> better! Hell, he <em>does</em>! He’s a fucking <em>idiot</em>…!</p><p>Shikamaru, meanwhile, even though he hates it, hesitates to make any moves to help Naruto, instead choosing to carefully weigh his options first. This is similar to what happened with Sakura, but it seems more severe somehow. He’s almost sure Naruto’s drowning in awful memories right now, lost in his own head, and the thought churns Shikamaru’s stomach. He doesn’t want to let him stay there, but he doesn’t want to scare him even more either. He doesn’t want to make this worse than it already is. Whatever he does, he’ll have to tread very carefully and just hope the others (<em>Kiba</em>) can keep quiet while he does it. He needs Naruto to focus solely on him right now.</p><p>Taking a deep, calming breath through his nose and letting it out through his mouth, then one more time for good measure (<em>thanks, Asuma</em>), Shikamaru reaches out. He just barely brushes Naruto’s fingers with his own, wanting to see what kind of reaction he’ll get before he does anything else.</p><p>Honestly, Naruto’s first instinct is to flinch, then fight. But something inside him recognizes that touch that’s as gentle and safe as a cloud passing overhead, and he stops himself from doing either. Well, mostly. His fingers still twitch.</p><p>Encouraged, Shikamaru goes a step further. “Naruto?” he hedges softly, as gently as he can. Not because he thinks Naruto’s a baby or needs to be coddled or anything stupid like that. On the contrary, Naruto is the absolute <em>strongest</em> person he knows, has <em>ever</em> known. He’s proud as all hell to be his friend, considers himself one of the luckiest people on the face of the damn Earth to have a place in his heart. But Naruto only became this strong because he <em>had</em> to to survive, because he’d persevered through a ton of painful and bitter things all on his own, and Shikamaru doesn’t want him to <em>ever</em> have to go through that again. He hates that he had to go through it at all. So, if Shikamaru can save him from any further pain by being kind and gentle and loving as hell when it counts, like he knows <em>intimately</em> it does right now…then damn it, he’ll do just about anything. “You okay?”</p><p>
  <em>“Get the hell out of here, trash!”</em>
</p><p><em>“A monster like </em>you<em> could never be our friend!”</em></p><p>
  <em>“Why can’t you just die already?!”</em>
</p><p>The younger boy takes a small, shuddering breath, the tiniest bit of tension leaving his shoulders even as he curls his fists in the sheets and the tears sting his eyes more.</p><p>“Y-…-yeah…”</p><p>The word is slow and pained and only somewhat sure. It’s raspy and tired and shaky, still a little far away, too, eyes the same. But Shikamaru will take it. He sighs with relief, vehemently thanking anyone or anything listening.</p><p>Feeling a little braver, a little more sure of himself now, Shikamaru rests his hand slowly, fully, on Naruto’s, a small, soft smile coming. His voice is warm. “Easy there, sunshine.” He flushes a bit at the new nickname that just kinda slipped out, but more life comes back to Naruto’s eyes for it, so his embarrassment can take a damn hike, as far as he’s concerned. He squeezes his hand. “Are you with me?”</p><p>That last line brings Naruto back to the night Shikamaru helped him after his nightmare. It drags him out of his memories’ dark, tumultuous depths, and he breathes a shaky sigh of relief. He smiles tiredly, as if he’s just woken up, and Shikamaru knows that’s not far from the truth. While he waits for Naruto to gather himself a little more, the brunet doesn’t waste any time trying to make him comfortable again, wetting one of the clean spare cloths the nurses left for them to wipe as much sweat as he can from his face, drying it with another<strong>. </strong>He takes care to discreetly wipe away his tears, too. Naruto leans into his touch eagerly, and by the time he’s done, he looks better. His smile might not be his usual, nowhere near his best, but it’s still a smile, and that’s all Shikamaru cares about, really.</p><p>Naruto sighs happily, much more comfortable now. “T-thanks a lot, Shikamaru…” His voice is stronger, but he’s obviously still on the way down from wherever he was. Flipping his hand over, he threads his fingers through his friend’s and squeezes right back. “I’m…I-I’ll be fine, don’t worry…”</p><p>Shikamaru can’t help softening at that, breathing a laugh and shaking his head. “Sorry. Too late for that last part. Appreciate the thought, though.”</p><p>Soft, gentle footsteps approach, careful to leave more than enough breathing room. “N-Naruto, are you…” a pause, concerned hesitation, “…are you sure you’re okay…?”</p><p>Naruto looks up to see Hinata, though he already knew it was her. That voice and those footfalls could only belong to one person. He takes another breath and squeezes Shikamaru’s hand again for purchase, then smiles at her. Shikamaru is glad to see it’s a little brighter than before. “I-I will be, Hinata, just you wait! You don’t have to worry about me, really!”</p><p>She gives him a <em>look</em>, a raised eyebrow with a small smirk, and Naruto blinks. He never thought he’d see an expression like <em>that</em> on her face. Shikamaru huffs a laugh, smirking himself. Well, <em>that’s</em> new. Seems all that extra time spent training with Neji must have him rubbing off on her. After a moment more of observing him, she seems to resolve something for herself and hums thoughtfully, digging into her jacket pocket.</p><p>What she pulls out is a small jar Naruto recognizes on sight. He instantly brightens and points. “Hey! That’s the healing ointment you gave me during the Chunin Exams!”</p><p>Hinata glances between them for a moment before she laughs and smiles happily, a shy blush coloring her cheeks. “Y-yes, it is! You remembered!” But then, of course he did. That’s just the kind of person he is.</p><p>He nods eagerly. “Well, yeah, of course! How could I forget? That stuff worked great after I kicked Kiba’s butt!” He snickers. Shikamaru joins him, and Hinata is unable to hold back a quiet giggle of her own.</p><p>When that doesn’t immediately get an indignant response from the Inuzuka (the only reason he’d said it), Naruto’s concerned. He cranes his neck to find Kiba huddled up against the wall, and he blinks, frowning. “Hey, Kiba, what gives?” He smirks a little, hoping to get something out of him this time. “It’s not like you to be so quiet when I’m ragging on you!”</p><p>Kiba doesn’t look his way just yet. He can’t. It’s…he still feels like he might be sick, especially if he looks at a still-recovering Naruto right now. He’s the <em>worst</em>…</p><p>
  <em>Krumph!</em>
</p><p>“<em>Ow</em>!” Kiba looks over to find the source of the sudden sharp pain in his hand, one eye squeezed shut. He opens it, mouth dropping open, too, a moment later. “A-Akamaru…?”</p><p>Akamaru’s sunk his teeth into his hand, and he’s <em>glowering</em> at Kiba something fierce, a low growl in the back of his throat. Kiba swallows and stares, mouth suddenly dry. The others aren’t much better. Naruto gasps sharply, and he watches with wide eyes. He’s…he’s never seen Akamaru do <em>that</em> before…! Shikamaru’s staring with mouth agape. What the <em>hell</em>…?! Is this some kind of pack thing? Hinata and Shino, while more accustomed to Akamaru and Kiba’s pack dynamics, are still stunned, Hinata dropping her healing ointment in her shock. Shino, as always, recovers quickest, silently observing to see what will happen next.</p><p>Kiba, for his part, can’t help but remember the last time this happened. Akamaru’s only bitten him like this once before, back when he was still a pup and they went after Sasuke the first time. He still remembers what he’d thought then, too—</p><p><em>Oh</em>… So maybe…<em>that’s</em> what he’s after… A tiny, rueful smile plays, and he huffs a laugh. His voice is considerably quieter and gentler when he speaks up next. “I must be a lousy master…” he glances Naruto’s way, “…for you to bite me like <em>that</em>…” He snorts, resigned. Reaching over, he pets Akamaru with his free hand. His best friend, always there for him, biting some sense into him when he needs it… He softens. “Good boy, Akamaru… I’m sorry, buddy…”</p><p>This isn’t <em>about</em> him. This is about <em>Naruto</em>. He’s finally awake and safe and all right, and that’s what matters. Hell, that’s what Kiba’s been <em>praying</em> for every night since that awful day… He just…lost his head for a bit there, not that that’s any excuse… He’ll…he hopes Naruto at least lets him apologize…</p><p>Seeing the change in him, Akamaru slowly releases his hand and starts licking the injury in a half-apology. Kiba gives Akamaru a small smile. He doesn’t blame him for anything. He definitely needed that—<em>deserved</em> it. Taking a breath to help steel himself against the rushing pain he <em>knows</em> will come, he forces himself to meet Naruto’s eyes.</p><p>A shiver runs down his spine, and his stomach churns something fierce. Yep, there it is. <em>Smarts</em>, all right… Shifting to his knees, he places his hands on top and bows his head as low as he can.</p><p>“I’m…I’m <em>sorry</em>, Naruto... I’m <em>so</em> sorry…” The blond’s eyes widen, and even Shikamaru’s eyebrows shoot up. They’ve…never heard Kiba sound like this, so…soft and vulnerable and wounded… “I…I didn’t <em>mean</em> to scare you like that, I <em>swear</em>… Please know I’d never—hurt you like that <em>intentionally</em>…” He bites his lip, actively has to work so he doesn’t slice through in his inner turmoil. “I-I’m not gonna ask you to forgive me. I don’t deserve it. I just…” He gazes down at his bleeding hand, the one Shino’s silently working on bandaging. He thinks about what it means, how this bite is different from the one back then. He thinks about how <em>scared</em> Naruto was, of <em>him</em>, when all he wants, has <em>ever</em> wanted, is to <em>protect</em> that idiot…! He really is a dumbass…! He runs his good hand through his hair rigorously, frustrated with himself. Blinking quickly at the sting in his eyes, he looks back up at Naruto, gaze charged. “You…you’re not just my friend, you know! You’re more than that! You may not be an Inuzuka by blood, but to me, to Akamaru and me, you’re…—!”</p><p>He squeezes his eyes shut against stubborn tears, everything he’s felt over the last few weeks coming back in full force. “Y-you’re <em>pack</em>, don’t you get that?! You can’t just—run off like that, almost get yourself <em>killed</em>! What’re the rest of us supposed to do if you <em>die</em>, huh?” His fangs pierce his lip and a tear or two escapes as he tries to gather himself, but he doesn’t care. Not right now. He rubs at his eyes with his jacket sleeve. “Do you even know what being part of a pack means? It means if you’re not there, if you pull shit like this—it means we’re not gonna be able to rest until we know you’re okay for ourselves! The entire time you were out, while we were on our mission, <em>all</em> I could think about was you! I wanted to know you were okay, <em>needed</em> to, and when we finally got the message on our way back that you were awake and recovering…” He finally opens his eyes, tears still sticking, and his voice drops. “I hadn’t felt relief like that in so long... I think the last time was…” he takes in Naruto’s injuries for the hundredth time before coming back, a protective edge to his voice, “…when I saw you after Sasuke did this the first time…”</p><p>Naruto can only stare, wide-eyed and speechless. His heart is beating in his chest something fierce. After a few long moments, he slowly points at himself. “S-so wait, you’re…you’re saying <em>I’m</em> really…?” He can’t bring himself to say it, the concept so…foreign and sacred for his tongue. “But…” he tilts his head, “…w-won’t your family get mad? I mean, isn’t that supposed to be for teammates and family and stuff?”</p><p>Kiba blinks, then laughs out loud. He can’t help it. Leave it to Naruto to worry about getting him in trouble with his Mom or something! His expression sobers into something soft, and his voice matches as he says, “You still don’t get it, do you?” Naruto swallows before shaking his head. Kiba beams. “Naruto, you idiot…!” He chuckles fondly, disbelieving. “You <em>are</em> family!”</p><p>Saying Naruto is shocked is an understatement. He gasps, eyes wide, heart hammering in his chest. He’s so caught off guard, he actually loses his grip on Shikamaru’s hand. Did…did he hear that right…? Did…did Kiba really just say…?</p><p>The Inuzuka rubs the back of his head. “I mean, yeah, maybe traditionally, it could make things weird, but the way my Mom runs things, she’s more about listening to our instincts! Plus,” he chuckles again, swiping across the bridge of his nose with a devil-may-care grin, “even if she <em>did</em> object, you’ve been pack for years, so that’d just be too bad for her!”</p><p>Naruto breathes a laugh at that, a little hard around the lump rapidly forming in his throat, not sure if his friend is brave or dumb. He’s only ever <em>seen</em> Kiba’s mom here and there, never actually interacted with her, but she looks pretty scary, and he’s sure that goes double when she’s mad! And that’s not saying anything about her wolf-looking Ninja Dog!</p><p>But mostly, he’s still caught up on the fact that…that Kiba called him…Kiba said he’s…!</p><p>His throat aches, vision blurs, and he’s not surprised when tears start falling. Kiba, seeing it, breathes in sharply and shoots to his feet. Luckily, Shino already finished bandaging his hand, but that’s the last thing on his mind right now. He makes to reach out, yet hesitates, remembering what happened before. He ends up curling anxious fists at his sides instead. “H-hey, what’s—d-did I say something wrong?”</p><p>Naruto sniffs wetly, and he clutches at the tissue Shikamaru presses into his hand. He breathes a laugh and smiles softly, shaking his head even as the tears increase. “O-of course not…! S-sorry, I’m just…I’m <em>happy</em>…!” A small sob escapes, and he tries to wipe his eyes, but the tissue might as well be nonexistent while he’s like this. Oh, well. Kiba’s shoulders lose some of their tension, but he’s still confused. “You…you called me…” a louder, more desperate sob comes, but he’s grinning up a storm at the same time, happy and touched and filled with so much <em>love</em> that it actually steals Kiba’s breath, “…<em>f-family</em>…!”</p><p>His friends, every one of them, can’t help the way their hearts beat and break for this boy—this precious, amazing person who’s clearly so much more to all of them than he knows. How anyone could <em>ever</em> treat him as anything less…they will <em>never</em> understand (or allow it, <em>ever</em> again).</p><p>Kiba, for his part, glances over at Shikamaru before making any moves toward Naruto. He might be an idiot, but he doesn’t have a <em>death</em> <em>wish</em>, after all. Like he suspected, Shikamaru’s watching him like a hawk, knowing what he’s thinking of doing before he even does it. Typical... Not that he can blame the guy any. On the contrary, he winces and wilts a bit under his stern gaze, but after another moment of intense scrutiny, his friend gives him a tiny smile, and Kiba sighs with relief. Thank goodness…</p><p>Coming closer, he stops at the end of the bed and hesitates for a moment or two before sitting down and slowly inching up until he’s about at Naruto’s knee. Not wanting to touch him directly yet for fear of scaring him again so soon, Kiba just rests the back of his hand so it’s barely brushing his sheet-covered leg, hoping his unnaturally high body temperature will comfort Naruto some. Looking up at his friend, only to find that he’s gotten <em>more</em> emotional the closer he’s come, he can’t stop himself from melting further. Seriously, this guy…</p><p>“Shikamaru was right before,” Kiba breathes, adoration in every note. “You really are the sun.”</p><p>That just makes Naruto cry harder, and Kiba swears it makes him love him more in turn. He really does mean it. <em>Naruto</em>… He draws all of them in without even trying, by just being himself, and sometimes he’s so bright, it hurts to look at him, but they look anyway because...</p><p>He’s <em>theirs</em>.</p><p>That sentiment in mind, unable to take watching Naruto like this anymore (he knows they’re happy tears, but <em>still</em>), he ventures enough to reach out, just slightly, toward the younger boy. “Can I…c-can I hug you?”</p><p>
  <em>Shoom!</em>
</p><p>Before Kiba can say or do anything else, Naruto grabs the front of his jacket and pulls him into his arms, wrapping him up as tightly as he can. “I-I forgive you…” he whispers, fists curling in black clothes as he nuzzles in as far as he can. “I-It scared me, yeah…b-but I know it came from a place of <em>love</em>, so…” A strangled sob bubbles up. “You’re…you’re <em>my</em> family, too…<em>a-all</em> of you…!” He sniffs, sobs. “I…I <em>love you</em>…<em>s-so</em> <em>much</em>…!”</p><p>The brunet is frozen while he takes all that in, but once he does, he’s quick as hell to hug Naruto back, beaming toothily. He presses into the crook between his friend’s neck and shoulder and breathes him in greedily, so happy he’s alive and okay and taking stock of what still needs to heal. He frowns a bit when he finds that his injuries really are as severe as they were told and that his healing really is slow as hell (not that he expected a less than up to date report from the Hokage), but Naruto just chuckles and holds him tighter for his pack gestures, and Kiba pushes the rest to the side. All that can wait.</p><p>Right now…he just wants to enjoy this.</p><p>Of course, right as he thinks that, Akamaru pushes himself between them to lick Naruto’s chin, and Hinata and Shino join in on the hug from both sides, unable to help themselves. Naruto laughs and beams for all it’s worth, and honestly…in what world could Shikamaru possibly say <em>no</em> to that? Rolling his eyes all too fondly, he slides in behind Naruto and wraps his arms around his waist, burying his face in soft sunflower hair.</p><p>He feels Naruto relax in their warm, protective, loving arms, and Shikamaru just tightens his hold and smiles more.</p><p>That’s <em>right</em>, Naruto… <em>This</em> is how loved you really are…</p><p>They stay like that for a long time, until Naruto stops crying. He moves to wipe his eyes and face, but Akamaru beats him to it. He laughs, surprised, and pets him in thanks, and for some reason, that reminds him. “Oh, yeah! Shikamaru!”</p><p>Shikamaru is the last to leave the little hug-pile, too comfortable and content, but even then, he doesn’t go far. He stays on the bed at Naruto’s side, and he won’t find Naruto complaining. Hell, he <em>prefers</em> him close, and if Shikamaru’s being honest, so does he. “Hmm?”</p><p>Naruto’s smile grows. “That new nickname you gave me earlier?” He chuckles as Shikamaru flushes. He’d almost forgotten! “I like it! I like it a lot!”</p><p>Shikamaru sighs, relieved. Honestly, it makes sense that he would, but still. He runs a hand through his hair and smirks. “Yeah, well…it just kinda slipped out, but it fits, so I’m glad you like it.” He winks and taps his temple. “I’ll keep it in the repertoire from now on, okay?”</p><p>Naruto throws up his arms. “<em>Woohoo</em>! All right!”</p><p>Shikamaru just snickers and points at him. “But hey, you still gotta think of one for me, too, remember? You promised you’d make it a good one!”</p><p>Naruto points right back. “I promised I’d do my best, but I <em>also</em> said no promises that it’d be good,” he sticks his tongue out teasingly, “so there!”</p><p>Shikamaru snorts.</p><p>Akamaru, his head still in Naruto’s lap, yaps playfully and licks them both before carefully climbing up to lay on the bed by Naruto’s feet. Naruto just stares for a moment before brightening, while Shikamaru has his hands half-outstretched, mouth hanging open some. His gaze zips over to the middle child of Team Kurenai. “K-Kiba, control your dog!”</p><p>Kiba snorts with a wolfish grin. “Hey, Akamaru’s his own dog! He always wants to be with injured pack, it’s in his nature!” Akamaru barks in agreement, tail wagging happily. “Besides, Naruto doesn’t mind,” he looks over at his friend, “do ya, Naruto?”</p><p>Said boy vehemently shakes his head, a wide, toothy grin on his face. “No way! This is the best!”</p><p>Shikamaru’s eyebrow twitches, and he looks over at Hinata and Shino for help. Shino raises his hands in a ‘don’t get me involved’ gesture, and Hinata just smiles sheepishly. “I-I’ve actually seen Akamaru lay with injured pack before. It—it really did help them recover faster, so…” she shrugs, “…maybe it’s a good thing? A-after all, the Nine Tails is a fox, so—?!” Suddenly realizing what she just said and where she was going with it, she cuts herself off with a gasp, throwing her hand over her mouth. Wide eyes shooting back to Naruto, she rushes to mend, waving her hands in front of her, “I-I didn’t mean— N-Naruto, I’m sorry!” She bows her head low, balling her pants into fists. How could she be so tactless?!</p><p>Naruto, for his part, raises an eyebrow. “What are you apologizing for?” She lifts her head in surprise, and he chuckles, rubbing the back of his head. “You’re not wrong. The Nine Tails <em>is</em> a fox, so I guess that would <em>technically</em> make it part of the canine family—”</p><p>A flash of deeply offended annoyance flares suddenly from that part of Naruto’s subconscious reserved for the Nine Tails’ presence, and Naruto’s hand drops like a stone, words dying on his lips. He’s only gone for about three seconds, his eyes far away, but it’s more than enough to get his friends’ attention, Shikamaru instantly using his hand as a grounding weight on his shoulder.</p><p>When Naruto comes back, it’s to the brunet squeezing his shoulder and calling, “Hey! Naruto! Are you okay?!”</p><p>He blinks a few times, the life comes back to his eyes, and he glances at Shikamaru like he’s just noticed he’s there. “Y-yeah, I’m fine. Sorry.”</p><p>They all sigh in relief, but Shikamaru’s is loudest of all, and he leans forward to rest his head on Naruto’s shoulder. “I swear, one of these days, you’re gonna give me a freakin’ heart attack…”</p><p>Naruto breathes a sheepish laugh and leans his head against his for a moment. “S-sorry…”</p><p>“It was the Nine Tails, wasn’t it?” Shino asks, and the others look at him. Naruto nods. “So it’s finally woken up, even if only in part?”</p><p>Naruto nods again, hand moving to his seal. “Yeah, I guess so. I’ve felt its presence here and there the last few days, so I figured it was waking up, but this is the first time I’ve felt its feelings that strongly in a while.” He laughs. “It does <em>not</em> like being compared to ‘lowly canine mutts,’ apparently.” He winks toward his dog friend. “No offense, Akamaru! <em>Its</em> words, not mine!” The Ninja Dog barks.</p><p>“Wait, hold on, back up.” Naruto peers up at Shikamaru, and he only just realizes the apprehensive, slightly-weirded out looks his friends are giving him. He shrinks a bit and looks away, not sure he likes them. It reminds him a lot of…when he was a kid… Shikamaru, sensing it, gentles his voice and the grip he still has on his shoulder. “Are you saying…you feel what it feels? And…vice versa?”</p><p>Naruto shakes his head a few times. “No, that’s…” He scratches it. “Well, I guess…kind of…?” He locks his fingers behind his head and hums, trying to think of how to explain it. He gaze trails back up to Shikamaru. He knows at least he won’t judge him on this. “It pretty much knows what I’m feeling all the time, but it really only <em>responds</em> when I feel enough hate or rage. It likes to try to coax me into using its power when things like that happen, but I…” he swallows, looks to the side in guilt and shame, clenching his fists, “…don’t let it, not anymore. It’s…I only feel what <em>it’s</em> feeling when whatever it is is really intense.” He wiggles his fingers toward Hinata and Akamaru. “The only reason it responded to any of that is because it has a <em>major</em> pride thing going on.” He snickers, smirking a bit as he spreads his arms out wide as far as they’ll go, lightly hitting Shikamaru in the chest. Not that he minds. Hell, he might as well just go for broke and admit that he finds just about every damn thing Naruto does endearing. “We’re talkin’ an ego as <em>huge</em> as the Leaf! Hell, maybe bigger!”</p><p>Shino hums. “The Nine Tails being so proud makes sense. That’s because almost nothing is known about the Tailed Beasts apart from how ridiculously powerful they are, and the Nine Tails is the highest on that scale.”</p><p>Naruto peers down at his seal thoughtfully. “Huh… I guess that <em>does</em> make sense… I’ve never really thought of it that way…” He shivers as he thinks of their few talks. “Still doesn’t mean he has to be such a creepy jerk, though…”</p><p>“Speaking of the Nine Tails, Naruto…” he turns his attention to Hinata this time, confused about the nervous look on her face, “…Lady Tsunade told us it actually helped save you when…” she swallows, “…things were looking their worst. Is…is that true?”</p><p>Naruto nods. “Yeah, that’s right. I remember it said, ‘Don’t give up, brat!’, and then…it protected me, kept me from dying.” He rests a hand over his seal. “It exhausted itself in the process. That’s why it’s been like this ever since.” He pulls down the torn collar of his hospital gown so they can see all the bandages underneath. “It’s why I’m not healing like I normally would, too.”</p><p>There’s a furious-embarrassed lash of a tail or two in the back of his mind. He’s gone for about two seconds, but the others don’t panic this time. That doesn’t stop Shikamaru from holding his breath until Naruto comes back, though. Naruto snickers more than last time, rubbing the back of his head. “Boy, it does <em>not</em> like me talking about that…”</p><p>Talking about when things got bad, though, reminds Naruto of what led to it, <em>who</em> did, and…he purses his lips, curls a light fit in his hospital gown. Well, he’ll have to tell them sooner or later… Might as well be now…</p><p>Sensing the change in him, Akamaru whines a bit and rests his head on his leg. Naruto gives him a small, grateful smile and reaches down to pet his head. “Don’t worry, boy. I think…I think you’ll be happy to hear what I’ve decided... I hope, at least.”</p><p>The other members of Team Kurenai, also not blind to the sudden shift in mood, perk up. “‘Decided?’ About what?” Kiba asks.</p><p>Looking up at him, at them, his heart pounds, and the words threaten to crowd in his throat. He…he wants to tell them, but…he’s scared, too. He doesn’t exactly want a repeat of Kiba’s little outburst earlier, though he’s pretty sure Kiba will be more mindful and able to control himself this time. Mostly, like with the others, he’s just scared they’ll be pissed and hate him for giving up on Sasuke…especially given that Kiba and Akamaru got so hurt when they helped go after him years ago…</p><p>Beside him, Shikamaru reaches over to gently uncurl his fingers from his hospital gown and squeeze, offers a sure, encouraging smile when Naruto looks his way, and Naruto takes a deep, cleansing breath. He smiles back, tiny and unsure, but more settled, always grateful, and he nods, squeezing in turn. He’s not alone here. He can do this, and the other friends he’s seen already have all agreed with his decision wholeheartedly, so…</p><p>He hopes these will, too.</p>
<hr/><p>All things considered, it goes way better than Naruto could have hoped. For one thing, he barely cries at all this time. And for another, his friends…</p><p>Hinata’s hand goes to her chest as she sighs heavily in relief. “Oh, thank goodness…!”</p><p>Kiba’s sigh is rougher, but maybe even more relieved. He grins toothily. “Seriously! I thought you were gonna say you were leaving to go after him again the second you were healed or something!” He laughs. “I thought Akamaru and I’d have to drag you back kicking and screaming!”</p><p>Naruto shakes his head vehemently. “N-no way, never again! I promised! You heard me, right?”</p><p>Kiba softens a bit at how earnest he is and nods. “Yeah, I heard you. And that’s how I know you really mean it.”</p><p>Shino, who’s been quiet this whole time, nods in agreement. “It’s for the best. That’s because Sasuke was never worth your time in the first place.”</p><p>They all stare at him for a moment, speechless, but then Kiba throws his head back to howl with laughter. “<em>Wow</em>! That was <em>savage</em>, Shino!”</p><p>“But not at all undeserved, especially given recent events.”</p><p>Shikamaru snorts at his quieter comrade’s complete and utter verbal massacre. He’s always appreciated that he doesn’t mince words, particularly at times like this. He nods, approving. “You’re damn right!”</p><p>Having gotten all of his friends’ <em>positive</em> answers, Naruto relaxes, slumping with relief himself, and Shikamaru nudges him, winking when they lock eyes. See? He told him it’d turn out okay. Naruto grins.</p><p>“Still, that does beg the question.” All eyes double back to Shino. “If you see Sasuke again…what will you do?”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen and face pales, stomach instantly churning. What…<em>would</em> he do…? Sure, the same question’s crossed his mind before, but… Honestly, maybe naively, he was hoping he never <em>would</em> have to see Sasuke again…so he wouldn’t have to make that call… He’s quiet for a moment or two as he thinks, and then he looks back at Shino, all of them at large. “I…I’d rather…you guys left him to me.”</p><p>Immediately, it’s like a bomb goes off.</p><p>“We can’t do that!”</p><p>“Out of the question.”</p><p>“No way in <em>hell</em>!”</p><p>Akamaru growls and barks in agreement.</p><p>Shikamaru is last, huffing a laugh, but there’s a <em>daring</em> look in his eyes, too. “You really are an idiot if you think we’d <em>ever</em> agree to that. Not after last time and <em>certainly</em> not after this. I’ll kick your ass <em>myself</em>, if I have to.”</p><p>Naruto can only stare, wide-eyed. Honestly, he was kind of expecting something like this…but he thought catching or stopping Sasuke would be their main priority. He never expected…<em>he</em> would be. Shikamaru picks up on it because of course he does, and he sighs inwardly, has to swallow back anything he might say. Now isn’t the time, but…he just wishes… Like he said last night…someday…<em>someday</em>, they’re all going to show Naruto <em>just</em> how damn important he is. One way or another.</p><p>Finally, Naruto sighs and rubs the back of his neck as he thinks of how to explain things to them. His gaze is intense, no-nonsense, more serious than most of them have ever seen it, when he fixes them with it again. “You weren’t there. You didn’t…<em>see</em> or <em>hear</em> how he was. Reading reports and hearing from Kakashi-sensei and Sakura or even <em>me</em> won’t prepare you for…how Sasuke is now. He’s…he’s totally lost it and bent on ending us <em>and</em> the Leaf entirely. He’s with the freaking <em>Akatsuki</em> now, the same people who’ve been after me for years, the same people who killed Gaara and—” he winces and his voice falters the slightest bit here, but none of them can blame him, “—and Pervy Sage and Asuma-sensei, too.” He squeezes Shikamaru’s hand for that one, hoping he isn’t upset. Shikamaru squeezes back. If anything, it just stokes the protective fire inside him. He doesn’t want to lose anyone else either. “It’s too dangerous for anyone else to fight him. I don’t—I don’t know if even <em>Granny Tsunade</em> could take him the way he is now. <em>Kakashi-sensei</em> was struggling, and he’s the one who <em>trained</em> Sasuke. Gaara told me even the Raikage <em>and</em> his sand couldn’t stop him when they fought at the Summit.”</p><p>He tightens his fists in the sheets, the very idea of a <em>single one</em> of his friends being hurt like he is—or worse, <em>actually</em> dying—at Sasuke’s hands making him want to be sick. It reminds him way too much of his nightmare. He shakes his head. “This isn’t a <em>game</em>. He’s <em>not</em> the Sasuke you remember. He can and <em>will</em> kill you if he gets the chance. He won’t hesitate. He didn’t even <em>blink</em> when he went to drive a kunai straight through Sakura’s <em>neck</em>.”</p><p>They all flinch at the imagery, the fire in his words. All of that <em>is</em> pretty significant, they have to admit. It’s quiet for a few somber, stifling minutes, and then Shikamaru breaks it with a tired sigh of his own. “Look, we can figure out what <em>we</em> will do,” he eyes Naruto pointedly, “once it comes to that, or at least gets closer. Even if Sasuke and the Akatsuki <em>wanted</em> to attack us, it’s too soon for them to make a move now, and they know it.” He glances at their knucklehead. “From what I understand, you did just as bad a number on Sasuke as he did you,” Naruto nods, “so he’s in no shape to threaten anyone. That should buy us quite a bit of time. Of course, all that’s <em>provided</em> he even survives.”</p><p>And truthfully? Shikamaru’s sure they’re all in agreement in hoping he won’t, and they’re not sorry for it, not even a little bit. Former comrade or not, he can never step back over the lines he’s crossed.</p><p>“That said,” he ruffles blond hair, making Naruto laugh and gentling Shikamaru’s smile – <em>that</em>, right there, is what he fights for, “the important thing is, you’re safe and alive and here with all of us. Let’s just focus on that for now, okay? Leave the contingency plans to me.”</p><p>Naruto leans into his touch just like always, going so far as to rest his head on his shoulder, too. “Sure thing.” His smile is like sunlight through clouds. “Thanks, Shikamaru.”</p><p>All of it just makes Shikamaru melt more, and he swears he doesn’t care if the others tease him for it later. He’s happy as can be right where he is, and he <em>knows</em> it shows on his face. “Any time.”</p><p>It’s quiet for a precious few moments, and then,</p><p>“Oh, that’s right!” Hinata pipes up suddenly, all this Sasuke talk reminding her. “Naruto, you asked about our mission before.”</p><p>Naruto blinks, and upon remembering, he lifts his head. “Oh, yeah! I heard it was some kinda tracking mission?” He rubs the back of it. “Not sure what exactly you were looking for, though.” He inspects them all over again, relieved when he doesn’t see any signs of injury. “I just wanted to make sure everything went okay.”</p><p>Hinata smiles helplessly. Leave it to him to always be thinking about them, even or maybe <em>especially</em> while he’s the one recovering in the hospital… Still, she’s not sure how he’ll take the news, worrying the material of her jacket between her fingers, her smile shrinking some. Naruto doesn’t miss it. “Well, actually…w-we were trying to track down Sasuke…”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen, and his mouth drops open some. “W-wait, really? But I thought the ANBU were taking care of that.”</p><p>She nods. “T-they were, but there aren’t as many sensory types, so when they came up empty-handed, Lady Tsunade sent us out instead. We were working in tandem with Sai and Captain Yamato. Kakashi-sensei and his nin-dogs helped out where they could, too.” She takes a breath and frowns deeply. “But...despite our best efforts, even extending our mission by a few days, we couldn’t find anything either.” Her fingers curl tighter in her jacket, and she glares at the floor. “It really <em>is</em> like they just disappeared into thin air. I couldn’t even see their chakra signatures. It was like…they were never there in the first place.”</p><p>Kiba nods with a frustrated huff, crossing his arms over his chest. “Yeah. Akamaru and I couldn’t smell anything at all. Usually if there’s even the <em>tiniest</em> hint, that’s more than enough for us,” he shrugs roughly, “but all we got was Akamaru cowering at how strong Sasuke was, the other guy, too.”</p><p>Hinata giggles into her hand at the memory while Shino snorts. “H-he tried to climb into Kiba’s jacket like when he was a pup, knocked him into the river and everything! It was hilarious!”</p><p>Akamaru whines, embarrassed, and Kiba blushes and pouts, though the sound of her laugh makes him less embarrassed and annoyed than he normally would be. “G-gee, thanks, Hinata…”</p><p>Hinata waves her hands their way. “<em>Ah</em>—! N-no offense, you guys! W-we just think it’s cute, that’s all!”</p><p>Naruto laughs a little, too, but…he’s also processing the Sasuke news, what little there is. Another dead end, huh…? He wonders what kind of jutsu that masked guy has that could make all traces of a person – hell, <em>two</em> people – disappear like they never existed. If that’s the kind of thing he’s facing in the Akatsuki, on top of the other stuff he knows about or has faced from them already…Pervy Sage and Granny Tsunade and all the others really do have more than good reason to worry about him.</p><p>And yet, as painful as this is…he gets the feeling that he might have chosen the perfect time to wake up and let go of Sasuke. Because now he can focus on recovering and getting stronger so he can be ready to protect himself and the people and home he loves when the Akatsuki come knocking!</p><p>Blue eyes finding the former Hyuuga heiress again, Naruto grins. “Thanks for telling me, Hinata! I really appreciate it!”</p><p>Hinata smiles right back, a light, happy blush coloring her cheeks. “O-of course! Don’t mention it!” She bows her head a bit. “Sorry I didn’t have better news for you.”<br/>
<br/>
Naruto’s smile wanes some, but he just shakes his head. “No, don’t be. I think…” he takes a deep breath and lets it out slowly, “…I think this is for the best. This way, I don’t get caught up in the cycle again.” Not that he intends to let himself anyway, but still.</p><p>Shikamaru and the others nod, in complete agreement. Thank goodness for that.<br/>
<br/>
His smile brightens as he thinks of something else. “Oh, hey! Did you guys see my nails?” They all blink or raise their eyebrows, Akamaru tilts his head, and he holds them up proudly, beaming up a storm. “Check ‘em out! Sai painted them last night! Aren’t they great?”</p><p>Shikamaru snorts fondly at his ridiculousness, and he just watches as the others crowd around him to get a good look at the intricate designs. Hinata gushes at how adorable and Naruto-like they are, and Kiba gets excited wondering if Sai would do Akamaru’s, too. Naruto tells them about how Sai thought up special things for everyone, and knowing Sai’s thoroughness, he’s sure that includes Akamaru! Kiba cheers, and even Shino names specific bugs he’d want on his, and soon, the whole room is buzzing with joy and laughter, very much carefree.</p><p>Shikamaru’s eyes are drawn to a beaming Naruto again (they always find their way back somehow, no matter how far they might travel, like they’re tied together – it reminds him of that red string of fate story his mom used to tell), and <em>bright</em> is all that comes to mind.</p><p>Yeah… He’s their sun, all right.</p><p>And Shikamaru will make <em>damn</em> sure he keeps shining. No matter what.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Because there aren't technically meant to be any ships in this fic (besides maybe in background) and because I feel like, at least in this AU, Hinata most likely would have outgrown her childhood crush on Naruto enough to realize she actually just admires and cares for him a lot as a friend at this point (especially since/while he was gone for 2.5 years), Hinata isn't <i>meant</i> to have her crush on Naruto here. <i>But</i> hey, if you want to think she still does, feel free! Just wanted to clear that up in case anyone's confused! ;) She also only stutters when she's particularly nervous, shy, or caught off guard, that kind of thing (I think it's the same in canon at this point, but it's been a while, so clarifying just in case!). Hopefully all that's okay with everyone!</p><p>The line Kiba says about Akamaru biting him is from <i>Naruto</i> episode 120, "Roar and Howl! The Ultimate Tag-Team!"</p><p>The lines about Naruto having to persevere through so many horrible things all on his own and Shikamaru wanting to be there for him so that never happens again are from his little speech in <i>Shippuden</i> Episode 383, "Pursuing Hope": "I only found out later, but Naruto had persevered through a ton of painful and bitter things all on his own…and…I don't want him…to <i>ever</i> have to go through that again."</p><p>And of course, those last few lines are a reference to Shikamaru's other speech about Naruto, how he wants to follow him and be by his side through anything in <i>Shippuden</i>, Episode 169, "The Two Students": "When I'm with Naruto, he makes me want to follow him, to walk by his side...no matter what."</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0013"><h2>13. Heartsight</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Team Gai rushes back from their extended training mission to visit Naruto, and Kakashi and Gai have a heart to heart about the curious change in Kakashi with his old team at his back.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Finally have this chapter up! Wanted to get it up last weekend/early this week, but real life kept delaying it, lol (including a minor eye infection <i>on top</i> of my double ear infection, apparently from the ear meds lowering my immune system, LMAO)! So, now that I'm all better, I can finally post! <i>Really</i> excited for this chapter and hope it's all right! Initially, I didn't think I had enough ideas for it, haha, but <i>obviously</i>, by the word count, that didn't end up being a problem! lol. I just hope I did everyone justice! I did my best!</p><p>Time for the shoutouts!</p><p>Thanks to <b>PierceHellAbove on FFN</b> for the idea of Tenten using chakra strings: "She also has the control necessary for chakra strings." (I love this idea, and I did my best to work it in well!)</p><p>Thanks to <b>Dancibayo on AO3</b> for for helping me figure out the Kakashi-Gai section! While I enjoy and can write the goofier Gai moments, I've always felt more confident writing more serious Gai moments (part of the reason I was hesitant to use Gai much, considering his more...exuberant moments are funny, but I'm more of a serious writer, lol). (Much appreciated! You're the best!)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Team Kurenai doesn’t stay too much longer. Once Naruto’s lunch arrives, they opt to head home, tired from their long mission. They promise to visit soon and make him promise to try to take it easy for once (not that they’re holding their breath, but they trust Shikamaru to keep him in line).</p><p>Finally getting some peace and quiet and with his stomach full, Naruto takes a small nap, still a little drained after his trip down traumatic memory lane. Shikamaru watches over him while he sleeps, reading over Team Kurenai’s mission report that Shino handed him on the way out. He keeps the healing ointment Hinata left on the nightstand to run by Lady Tsunade when she visits next.</p><p>A few hours later, Naruto’s awake and feeling better. Shikamaru’s glad to see it, and he’s offering to tell him a little more about Team Kurenai’s mission when they hear pounding footsteps in the hallway.</p><p>They look at each other with raised eyebrows. <em>More</em> visitors? Of course, then Shikamaru counts how many days it’s been, and…<em>oh</em>…</p><p>Taking a deep breath, he steels himself and smirks. “<em>This</em> oughta be good…”</p><p>Naruto isn’t quite sure what he means. “What? What will be?”</p><p>The door slide-slams open as if to answer, and Team Gai rushes in as one—only to promptly get stuck. They struggle and grumble and argue about the best way to get out, Lee trying to make it a competition with Neji as Gai cheers them on and an exhausted Tenten begs him not to encourage them.</p><p>All the while, just watching all this, Shikamaru stares with a look of mild horror on his face, eyebrow twitching, before he sighs wearily. Never mind… This is going to get <em>weird</em> before it gets good (and he’s betting even <em>that</em> will be weird). He should have expected as much from Team Gai… At his side, Naruto is laughing his head off, one arm around his stomach while he points at the group with the other, and Shikamaru can’t help breathing a laugh with a helpless smirk. He <em>supposes</em> he can live with their shenanigans if it makes Naruto laugh like <em>that</em>…</p><p>Finally, Lee, being the smallest of them, sucks in as much air as he can and squeezes out from between his teammates, which lets the others finally get through. Gai is quick to congratulate his pupil, offering his signature grin and thumbs up. “Great thinking, Lee!”</p><p>Lee returns it wholeheartedly. “Thank you, sensei!”</p><p>Neji and Tenten know they could retort, but they also know it’s not worth it. They just sigh and give each other a commiserating look. Honestly…</p><p>Naruto, for his part, is just calming down from his laughing fit. “You guys are hilarious!” He takes a moment to wipe his eyes and get his breath back, then smiles brightly. “Thanks! I think I needed that!”</p><p>Like a flipped switch, all attention in the room suddenly shifts to him. Lee and Gai’s eyes instantly fill with tears, Tenten covers her mouth as her own emotions well, and Neji looks over his injuries intently, even activating his Byakugan to check on his legs. The blond’s eyes widen, and he’s about to ask what’s up when two pairs of strong arms wrap around him from both sides and two tear-flooded faces press against his.</p><p>“<em>You are </em><em>okay</em>!” Lee shout-sobs, squeezing Naruto tighter and rubbing their cheeks together.</p><p>“<em>We were so worried</em>!” Gai bolsters, just as emotional. “<em>Thank goodness you’re all right, Naruto</em>!”</p><p>Despite being partially scolded right now, Naruto isn’t about to let an opportunity for a hug from these two pass him by. He hugs them back as tightly as he can. “I’m really, really sorry!” he apologizes, rubbing his cheeks against theirs. “I swear I never meant to worry any of you! It won’t happen again, I promise!”</p><p>Neji perks up at that last part, but before he can say anything, Gai sobs a bit and shakes his head a few times. “Don’t you worry your precious little head about <em>us</em>! <em>You’re</em> the one recovering!”</p><p>Lee nods, sniffling. “Gai-sensei is right, Naruto! Please think about yourself for once!”</p><p>Naruto laughs sheepishly, and Shikamaru and Neji both sigh. At this point, they genuinely think he doesn’t know <em>how</em>…</p><p>Tenten nods, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. “We appreciate the apology, but they’re right, ya know! <em>You’re</em> the one in the hospital here! <em>We</em> were just on a training mission,” she points at Neji and Lee, “mostly so these two wouldn’t keep trying to <em>sleep</em> here until you woke up!”</p><p>“Hmm?” Naruto glances at Shikamaru to confirm, and he nods. Yep, it’s true. Neji and Lee visited all the time, mostly together, and they’d tried to sleep here a few times so they wouldn’t have to leave Naruto, but the nurses had kicked them out. They didn’t have special permission like Shikamaru or sneak in past visiting hours and leave before morning rounds like Sakura.</p><p>Naruto looks between the two. Naturally, Lee isn’t ashamed at all, and Neji isn’t either, the light blush on his face notwithstanding. It’s more out of frustration at getting caught than any real embarrassment. “We wanted to be here for you, Naruto!” Lee explains.</p><p>Neji nods. “We didn’t want you to be alone.” Realizing how that might sound to Shikamaru, though, he looks his way to clarify, but the younger man is already waving a hand and smiling. He knows what he meant. Neji relaxes and smiles back, grateful. All they want out of this is for Naruto to feel safe and loved. That’s all.</p><p>All of it just makes Naruto smile softly, adoration swirling in his chest. “Thanks so much, you guys…”</p><p>Once Lee and Gai finally let him go, Naruto remembers the rest of what Tenten said. “Oh, yeah!” He balls his fists at half-mast excitedly. “So, how’d your training mission go anyway? Did ya learn anything cool?”</p><p>Shikamaru snorts, dropping his chin into his hand with a fond smirk. Of course his brain’s already shifting back into training mode. Sheesh… Maybe he should count himself lucky that the kid’s legs aren’t working yet or he’d be running him ragged…</p><p>Tenten raises her hand. “<em>Ooh</em>, <em>ooh</em>!” She wiggles her fingers toward him, smile excited and proud. “I’m really starting to get the hang of using chakra strings! I’m getting a lot better at throwing, recalling, and even switching weapons at will with them, too!”</p><p>Naruto gasps, stars in his eyes. “<em>No</em> <em>way</em>! You’re learning how to use <em>chakra</em> <em>strings</em> like Kankuro?!” Tenten nods, a shy, happy little hum escaping. “That’s <em>so</em> <em>cool</em>! I didn’t know that!” Then, remembering something from Kankuro’s visit, he can’t help but smirk her way. “Was that part of your sparring match?”</p><p>Tenten blushes and looks away, fiddling with her fingers. Why does Naruto have to be so observant?! “M-maybe! He’s—he’s the one who suggested I try them, actually, saying they’d be a good fit for me with my chakra control. He said if I could get them to pair well with my weapons, it could be really useful in battle.”</p><p>Chuckling triumphantly, Naruto grins. “That’s awesome, Tenten! I’m really happy for you! He’s right, too! They would be a good fit for you!”</p><p>Somehow, she gets the feeling he’s talking about more than just her new jutsu, but either way, she flushes a little more, a confident smile lighting her face. “T-thanks, Naruto! I think so, too! I’m—I’m really excited to see where it goes!”</p><p>Naruto’s smile grows, and he flashes a thumbs up. “Best of luck, then! I know you can do it!”</p><p>Tenten beams, and she swears it just makes knowing he’s okay more emotional for her. She might not have shown it as much as the others, wanting to try to be a rock for her frazzled team, but…she was really worried about him, too. She’s so glad everything turned out okay…</p><p>Lee speaks up next, as enthusiastic about training as always. “I have not developed anything new myself, but Neji, Gai-sensei, and I sparred in a lot of different ways, including blindfolded and hanging upside down from a cliff,” Naruto isn’t nearly as surprised as Shikamaru; that sounds just like the outrageous training Naruto’s seen Team Gai do over the years, “and it was really quite invigorating!” His eyes light up as an idea strikes. “Perhaps you should come with us next time, Naruto!”</p><p>“Hey, I’ll try anything once!” Naruto rubs the back of his head. “It probably won’t be for a while, though, with my legs an’ all, and I’m not sure I’d actually be able to keep up with you guys…”</p><p>Lee waves a hand. “Please do not worry! That is <em>more</em> than all right! We realize our training can be hard for others to adjust to!” He beams and curls excited fists as half-mast. “The important thing is that it will be all the more enjoyable with you there, Naruto!”</p><p>Naruto beams and chuckles, a shy blush coloring his cheeks. “G-gee, thanks!”</p><p>“Naruto.”</p><p>Neji’s been quiet this whole time, just observing and letting his teammates hash out their feelings and have their time with Naruto, but now that things have calmed down, he wants to get to the bottom of something Naruto said before.</p><p>Naruto looks over, blinking at his serious expression. “Neji? What’s up?”</p><p>Thinking back to the injuries he saw, the worst in Naruto’s legs with his Byakugan, Neji draws a deep, cleansing breath before meeting his friend’s eyes. It’s good to see those comforting blues again. For a while there, he was afraid he never would. “Earlier, you promised us something like this would never happen again. What exactly did you mean by that?”</p><p>Naruto winces, good mood instantly assassinated. Leave it to Neji to be so observant and not beat around the bush… Now he almost wishes he wouldn’t have said anything. But he doesn’t regret apologizing, not for a second, and like with all the others, he knows he’ll have to tell them about his decision eventually. He doesn’t want them to have to worry about him anymore, to have to sneak around and possibly get in trouble with Granny Tsunade and go on an extended training mission just to be able to sleep through the night. They <em>deserve</em> to know.</p><p>More than that, he <em>wants</em> them to know. This decision is hard on him, maybe the hardest he’s ever had to make, but…he also knows in his heart that it’s the <em>right</em> one, just like Pervy Sage <em>wanted</em> him to be able to judge on his own. And knowing that, while he’s almost certain they’ll be happy about what he’s decided, he wants to make <em>sure</em>. He doesn’t want anyone to be hurt or blindsided. Besides, if he’s right, this <em>should</em> be one of the last times he’ll have to repeat it, and it <em>is</em> getting easier to voice the more he does it, just like he hoped, so…</p><p>To be completely honest…he hasn’t let go of Sasuke in his heart yet, and he’s not sure if he’ll ever <em>completely</em> be able to forget about him like Pervy Sage asked of him. He doesn’t think the others expect him to, not even Granny Tsunade (she still remembers Orochimaru, after all), and if he always holds on to a piece of Sasuke, even if just as a reminder of what not to repeat in the future, then…he hopes that’s all right, too. He’s still confident that he’ll be able to dismiss him from his mind and move on, move <em>forward</em>, the way Pervy Sage always wanted, and with his friends, his <em>family</em>, by his side?</p><p>Shikamaru takes his hand in a show of support, and Naruto wraps his back around two times stronger, a tiny smile lighting his face. He thinks…that sounds pretty good. Hell, from where things stand now, it sounds <em>amazing</em>.</p><p>Like a future he wants to see. A future worth fighting for.</p><p><em>Living</em> for.</p><hr/><p>To say they’re shocked is an understatement. But once Naruto starts explaining…things start making more sense.</p><p>Still, being on the original Sasuke Retrieval squad, half of this team has more of a stake in this than just about anyone else, besides Team Kakashi, Kiba (and Akamaru), Choji, and Shikamaru, and that’s why Naruto’s so concerned. He <em>needs</em> to make sure they understand why he’s doing this.</p><p>It’s why he bows his head as low as he can to them now, pain be damned. “I know you and Lee fought as hard as you could to get Sasuke back years ago, Neji, and I still appreciate <em>everything</em> you guys did! <em>Please</em> don’t think I don’t! I can’t tell you how much I love you for that!” Tears sting his eyes, and he curls fists in his sheets. Shikamaru’s hand on his back is a warm comfort he’s not sure he deserves. “Neji, you—you almost <em>died</em> for it—!” His voice breaks, and Neji’s frown deepens, the others’, too. “I…I still hate that I couldn’t help you then…and I don’t…I don’t want you to think I’m ungrateful! That’s—that’s the <em>last</em> thing I’d ever feel about this, I swear!”</p><p>He swallows thickly, sniffs, a few tears falling. “But I…I can’t keep doing this, chasing Sasuke like this…! I’m scaring everyone, I’m <em>hurting</em> the people I love, a-all of <em>you</em>, and that’s…I can’t do it anymore…not for someone like <em>him</em>…! I…I couldn’t live with myself, <em>kn-knowing</em> what I know now…!”</p><p>Things are quiet for a long few moments, and then…a gentle hand comes to rest on Naruto’s head. “For someone with such remarkable eyes…you really can be blind.”</p><p>Naruto lifts his head to find Neji fixing him with the softest look he ever has, like he’s the most precious thing in his entire world, and he…doesn’t know what to do with that. A shy-touched blush colors his cheeks. “H-huh?”</p><p>Carding his fingers through Naruto’s hair slowly, tenderly, maybe a few extra times with the way Naruto all-too-happily leans into it (he doesn’t know if he’ll ever get this opportunity again, after all), doing his best not to think about how close he came to losing the most influential person in his life, Neji melts a little more and gently pokes the star of his face. “I told you once that sometimes your eyes are even better than mine.” Recognition dawns instantly for Naruto, and Neji nods. “The day we went after Sasuke, I wanted to get him back, yes, but not for my sake. To be honest, I agreed with Shikamaru in that I never liked him much in the first place.” A heartbeat. “I did it for <em>you</em>, Naruto, and I’d do it again.” Naruto’s eyes widen and breath catches. “It’s true that we were worried about you going after Sasuke all these years, and we never wanted you to torture yourself over him, but none of us have ever really cared about how <em>we</em> feel. We’ve always been at our best when <em>you</em> are happy, Naruto,” the younger boy’s heart pounds<strong>, </strong>“and if that means letting Sasuke go, then we’re all for it.” Neji takes a seat beside him on the bed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Frankly, I’d say it’s about time.”</p><p>Stepping up on Naruto’s other side, Lee rests a hand on his shoulder. “Neji is right, Naruto.” His voice is gentle and kind, understanding, smile matching. “We do not think you are ungrateful at all. I believe that is one of the <em>last</em> words we would ever use to describe you. In fact, I think we are all very relieved to hear that you are thinking of yourself <em>as well</em> as us for a change.” He chuckles sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head, and the others are quick to join in. Shikamaru cackles into his hand, while Neji more politely hides his laughter in his sleeve. Tenten apologizes after her own small bout, but Gai has no such qualms, throwing his head back to laugh out loud. Naruto just blinks at them uncomprehendingly (which just makes Shikamaru laugh harder). Once they calm down, Lee goes on. “I know your friends have always been and will always be your first priority, and I respect you for that. I find it very admirable. But devotion is a two-way street, Naruto, so please,” he squeezes his shoulder, “please know that <em>you</em> are <em>our</em> first priority as well.” He winks, grins, and offers an encouraging thumbs up. “There is no need to beat yourself up over this anymore. We think you are making the <em>right</em> choice.”</p><p>Naruto’s openly gaping at him, then the rest, eyes blown wide and teary for a completely different reason this time. He’s…their <em>priority</em>…? Their…their <em>first</em>…? This team and Shikamaru, <em>all</em> of his friends’…? It takes him a long few moments to find his voice, and when he does, it’s semi-strangled with emotion. “‘The right’...? Y-you do? Really?”</p><p>“Well, <em>yeah</em>! Of course!” Tenten raises an eyebrow at the younger boy, planting her hands on her hips. “You really think we’re just going to stand by Sasuke almost killing you <em>once</em>, let alone <em>twice</em>, and <em>not</em> hate his guts for the rest of our lives?!” She crosses her arms and huffs, pouting a bit. “What kind of friends do you take us for?” Given a moment, she softens. “<em>Seriously</em>, Naruto…you’re like a little brother to all of us. We just want you safe and happy, and Sasuke was <em>never</em> going to be that for you. Even <em>you</em> have to see that by now.”</p><p>Naruto blinks, but he nods. “Y-yeah, I…I get it, don’t worry.”</p><p>Neji nods in agreement. He’s already offered what he thinks of the situation, but still. “No question. Like I said, the way I see it, this is <em>long</em> overdue.”</p><p>Gai sets a large hand on Naruto’s shoulder, and the boy looks up. Gai’s eyes are full of tears, which isn’t exactly uncommon, but Naruto’s not used to having it directed at <em>him</em>, not like this. “Uh…Gai-sensei? Are you—?”</p><p>Gai sniffs, and then his arms are around Naruto, pulling him in close. “<em>I’m so proud of you, Naruto</em>!”</p><p>For a moment, Naruto is frozen. This is different from the combined hug he got from him and Lee before. He’s never been hugged by Gai-sensei <em>alone</em> before… It’s tight, almost suffocating, which he always figured, but not in a bad way. There’s a poignant gentleness to it, too, that Naruto can’t quite name. It’s all-encompassing and protective, and his hand is cradling the back of Naruto’s head like he’s something indescribably precious… He doesn’t think he can be blamed when he has to squeeze his eyes shut against touched tears as he hugs him back as tightly as he can. “<em>T-thank you</em>, Gai-sensei…!”</p><p>Gai just holds him closer. This kid… He might not get to interact with him much, not nearly as much as he’d like, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t adore him. How could he possibly not? He’s done so much for all of his students. He gave Neji the wake-up call he needed, a completely different perspective on life, changed him for the <em>better</em> in every way. He’s encouraged and been there for and been a <em>friend</em> to both Lee and Tenten when almost no one else was. Gai’s heard from the other senseis and seen for himself how much Naruto’s done the same for the rest of the Konoha 11 and company, too. And for all of that, he’s never asked for a single thing in return, of <em>any</em> of them. All he’s ever wanted is for them to acknowledge and accept him for <em>who</em> he is instead of what, to be his <em>friend</em>, the most precious thing in the world to him.</p><p>And as if that weren’t enough, he’s done so much more than he knows for Kakashi, too. Naruto doesn’t know what Kakashi was like before Team 7 was formed, doesn’t know everything he’s been through, doesn’t know the darkness he’s been lost in, but if he did…he’d know just how much he’s helped his sensei, just how much he’s changed him, that he’s <em>still</em> changing him, every day, bit by bit. A person would have to know Kakashi well to see it, but…that just comes with the territory of being his eternal rival, he supposes. Gai’s seen Kakashi’s fragile heart be ruthlessly shattered time and again over the years, and he knows better than anyone that he’s only just started being able to painstakingly piece it back together in the last few. Now more than ever, he <em>wishes</em> he could tell Naruto everything so he could thank him properly… But it’s not his place or the right time, so this hug will have to do, at least for now.</p><p>He meant what he said about being proud of Naruto for his decision, too. He knows how much this Sasuke debacle has been hurting Naruto, and he’s hated it since the day the Uchiha left the village. It’s been weighing on all of Team 7 ever since, but none more so than Naruto, who took it upon himself to bring Sasuke back. He even went so far as to leave the village to train with Master Jiraiya for two-and-a-half years to get stronger so he could bring him back home. But…knowing when people are worth it is one of the toughest, yet most important lessons life has to offer, and he’s glad Naruto’s finally realized that Sasuke isn’t. Honestly, Gai was beginning to worry that he never would, and he knows everyone else who cares about Naruto was fearing the exact same thing. So knowing that he’s giving up on him so he can focus on the rest of them… Honestly, Gai couldn’t be prouder and more relieved if he tried.</p><p>That and all the rest are why he makes sure to pour all of his love and appreciation into this embrace. This incredible, golden-hearted child… He deserves it more than anyone.</p><p>When they separate a minute or so later, Naruto wipes his eyes and looks over when Shikamaru nudges him, only to have him grin and ruffle his hair. That reassurance is the last piece Naruto needed to know everything really is okay. He sighs in relief and beams at all his friends. “Thanks so much, you guys! You’re the best!”</p><p>They talk for an hour or two more, till the sun starts to set, and then Gai sets his hands on his hips with a flourish. “<em>All right</em>, my beloved students, what do you say we head home? It’s getting late, and it’s been a long mission! You’ve all more than earned a good rest!”</p><p>Tenten immediately moves to protest, fists balled pleadingly at her chest. “<em>Aw</em>, but <em>sensei</em>! We’ve barely gotten any time with Naruto! Can’t we stay just a <em>little</em> bit longer?”</p><p>Gai ruffles her hair with a loud, fond laugh, making her pout. “Now, Tenten. I <em>know</em> I’ve taught you that hard training only pays off if your body can keep up, and it can only do that when you get proper rest. Eating a good meal and heading to bed early is <em>exactly</em> what this team needs to be in tip top shape for training tomorrow morning!”</p><p>Tenten deflates, eyes comically huge and teary. “But—but we just got <em>back</em> from a training mission! We have to get back to it <em>already</em>?”</p><p>“<em>That’s right</em>!” He winks and puts his fingers about a half-inch apart. “It’ll only be a half-day so we don’t push ourselves <em>too</em> far, but we <em>still</em> have to give it our all!” He strikes a pose. “The power of youth <em>compels</em> us!”</p><p>Lee cheers, gleefully pumping his fists, while Tenten groans and once again regrets her life choices. She should be used to this by now, but somehow, her sensei still manages to sneak this stuff up on her…</p><p>Naruto, meanwhile, is practically salivating at the idea of training. “<em>Training</em>…” he murmurs longingly.</p><p>At his side, Shikamaru snorts. “Don’t start. You can’t even <em>stand up</em>, genius, how exactly do you expect to <em>train</em>?” He knocks their knees together. “You <em>just</em> got back the use of your right arm a few days ago. Take it easy, will ya? Unless you <em>want</em> me to be gray before I’m eighteen.”</p><p>Naruto sighs and slumps. “I guess not…”</p><p>Shikamaru wheezes a laugh, smile growing. He can’t help it with him, he swears. “You <em>guess</em>?”</p><p>“You three can go on ahead. I’ll catch up,” Neji announces suddenly, all eyes turning to him. His gaze moves to their youngest, expression softening. “I want to discuss a few things with Naruto.”</p><p>Naruto just stares, blinking questioningly, while Gai nods. “All right, Neji. Just don’t take too long. I’m sure Naruto needs his rest.”</p><p>A nod. “Of course. Understood.”</p><p>Ruffling Naruto’s hair again, Gai winks his way. “I’ll be rooting for the power of youth to speed up your recovery, Naruto! We’ll be back to check on you soon!”</p><p>Naruto grins. “Thanks, Gai-sensei! I appreciate it! Have a good time training tomorrow!”</p><p>Tenten looks between them with a whine in the back of her throat. “Oh, <em>fine</em>! But if we’re leaving, at least let me…!”</p><p>Flitting to Naruto’s side, she throws her arms around his neck and hugs him tightly, burying her face in his shoulder. Naruto forgets to breathe for a moment. This is another first for him. Her hugs are so…warm, and he can feel her smiling into his shoulder. She takes the moment to breathe him in, long and slow, and her breath tickles his neck when she lets it out, only to melt into his arms a little more with relief. Her voice is soft and low, warm just like the arms around him. “I’m so glad you’re all right… I wanted to be strong for the others, but you had me worried sick, you know…”</p><p>He doesn’t dare pass up the opportunity to hug her back, which just makes her tighten her hold on him. She’s so small, but fierce, too. He’s always admired that about her. “Sorry about that. I really didn’t mean to, I promise.”</p><p>She breathes a laugh and shakes her head, lightly knocking it against his for a second. “Hey, no need to apologize. You already did, and I forgave you. Just…” she lets out another breath, “…let us know if you need anything, okay?” Her voice is sweeter than before somehow, and he relaxes a little more. He’s secretly always found her voice comforting. “I know you have Shikamaru, but…still. We’re all here for you. Don’t forget that.”</p><p>He nods as she slowly pulls away. “D-don’t worry, I won’t forget. I’ll keep you posted.” His smile is warm and bright. “Thanks, Tenten!” He wiggles his fingers toward her, unable to help himself. “Good luck with those chakra strings of yours! I know you’ll be great!”</p><p>She beams, a light blush coming. Again, she gets the idea he’s talking about more than just her training. “T-thanks, Naruto!”</p><p>Unable to help himself, Lee sneaks in one last hug, too, and Naruto laughs, immediately hugging him back. “I have adjusted my personal training regimen to pass this way a few times a week, so if you need anything, please let me know as well! No matter what it is, I will do my best to procure it for you!”</p><p>Naruto nods, mimicking his friend’s usual wink, grin, and thumbs up. “You got it! Thanks, Bushy Brow!”</p><p>Lee returns the gesture, chuckling at the familiar nickname. “Of course! You were there for me while I was recovering from my fight with Gaara, so I will be here for you!”</p><p>All that said and done, Gai points toward the door with his signature toothy grin. “Okay, team, <em>let’s go</em>!”</p><p>Naruto, Shikamaru, and Neji bid them goodbye as they take their leave, and then it’s quiet in the hospital room. It’s a welcome reprieve.</p><p>“So, uh…what’d you wanna talk to me about?”</p><p>Neji’s gaze drifts, and he hums thoughtfully. It’s true that he wanted to talk to Naruto alone, but now that he’s here…he’s not quite sure how to approach it. Of course... He smiles softly. Naruto never lets that stop him, just says what’s on his mind, so…maybe he should take a page out of his book for once.</p><p>Turning back to his friend (his <em>benefactor</em>, even <em>savior</em>, in his mind), he does just that.</p><p>“I know you’re still conflicted about your decision about Sasuke.” Naruto’s breath stops in his chest, but he doesn’t deny it. “Not so much the decision itself as the pain it brings you and your anxiety about how the rest of us will feel.” A patient smile paints the Hyuuga’s lips. “I won’t tell you not to worry because I know you will anyway. That’s just how you are. But I will say this.” He eyes Naruto seriously, and the younger knows to listen closely. “You know you can’t do anything for Sasuke anymore. He’s long been beyond our help, maybe even since the beginning, and we just couldn’t see it. You also know that you deserve better. You always have.”</p><p>He reaches out to poke Naruto’s heart gently. “So don’t let this—” <em>this</em>, giving up on Sasuke, finally understanding everything with such excruciating clarity and wondering <em>why</em> he didn't (couldn’t? didn’t <em>want</em> to?) before, “—be your cage.” Naruto’s eyes widen at the phrasing, and he watches Neji lift his headband just enough to let him glimpse his Caged Bird Curse Mark, Shikamaru, too. “You helped free me from mine,” his smile grows and softens at once, “so I’ll do anything I can to help free you from yours.”</p><p>Naruto is struck speechless, understanding the weight of his offer better than anyone else ever could. He can’t tell him how much it means to him. After a moment, he nods slowly, eyes never leaving Neji’s. He’s not surprised to feel a lump trying to form in his throat. His voice is quiet and touched, a little choked up, when he finally finds it. “T-thank you, Neji. I…I understand. I’ll do my best.”</p><p>Neji breathes a laugh, smile widening a little more. “I wasn’t worried. You never give us anything less.”</p><p>“And…” Naruto motions toward his heart, “…and if I need help, I’ll…” a small smile, “…I’ll tell you, okay?”</p><p>Neji nods, a small, relieved breath leaving him, some of the tension in his shoulders, too. “Please do, any time. No matter when, I’ll be here. <em>Thank you</em>, Naruto.”</p><p>Of course, Neji’s advice and seeing his Curse Mark remind Naruto of how Sasuke was when they fought, and…his gaze drifts to his injuries. His smile falls, and his friends notice the change in atmosphere immediately. Naruto laughs at himself, but it’s wry, ashamed. “You may have been right when you called me a loser when we met, you know that?” He raises the hand he couldn’t move until a few days ago. “I had to have it beaten into me <em>twice</em>,” he clenches a tight fist, “to see that Sasuke isn’t worth it…”</p><p><em>Isn’t</em>, huh? Well, that’s progress. Shikamaru will take it. Still…he wishes Naruto wouldn’t be so hard on himself. Hell, look at Master Jiraiya. He was an adult, well into his <em>fifties</em>, and he almost lost his life <em>way </em>more than twice before he finally got it through his head that Orochimaru was a lost cause. Frankly, he’s relieved Naruto caught on so soon, all things considered (though he knows it’s in large part due to his master’s advice that Naruto was <em>able</em> to do so, and he’ll always be grateful).</p><p>Neji, for his part, isn’t about to let that stand. He still wants to Eight Trigrams his younger self into next week for being such a whiny, holier-than-thou <em>brat</em> back then. Reaching out, he tilts Naruto’s chin up with gentle fingers, expression dead serious. “You’re <em>wrong</em>, Naruto. You want to see the good in people, and you want to believe everyone can be saved through love and acceptance, just like you were. That’s not naïve, it’s <em>admirable</em>.” He chuckles. “I may have only met Master Jiraiya a few times, but even I could tell, you two were a lot alike that way.”</p><p>Naruto’s eyes widen at being compared to his master, heart hammering in his chest. A slip of heartache comes in like it always does, but ultimately, it makes him smile lovingly, too. His teeth even make an appearance in his pride, a light blush dusting his cheeks. Glad to see it, Shikamaru, too, Neji goes on. “There’s <em>nothing</em> wrong with that. There’s <em>nothing</em> <em>wrong</em> with having a good heart, an open one, even in our harsh ninja world. It’s what’s let you change me and so many others for the <em>better</em>.” Kakashi-sensei told him the same thing… Shikamaru nods in complete agreement. Naruto’s heart, its power, truly is an incredible thing to behold.</p><p>“And what Sasuke did to you…” Neji clenches a fist. “It has <em>nothing</em> to do with you, not really. You’re just…<em>good</em>, through and through, Naruto, and Sasuke…” He takes a breath. “That darkness I talked about on our mission to get him back, the darkness he was lost in…” recognition flashes in Naruto’s eyes once more, and Neji can’t help but marvel; he must commit every interaction with all of them to memory, take them to heart, no matter how small, “…he’s let it swallow him up completely, taint his soul, and once someone goes down that path…”</p><p>He shakes his head, frown fierce, brow turning down in a sharp line. “<em>No</em> <em>one</em> can reach him now. He had <em>no</em> regard for the life of his own <em>comrade</em>, discarded her like <em>trash</em> when she wasn’t of <em>use</em> to him anymore...” The very idea makes his knuckles crack, teeth clench so hard that they groan, sharp eyes glare so heatedly that it’s a wonder the wall behind Naruto’s head isn’t on fire. “It makes me <em>sick</em>. It’s the <em>lowest</em> of the low…” In his book and <em>all</em> of the Konoha 11’s. Maybe because it’s…it’s nearly the same thing Sasuke did to Naruto years ago…</p><p>It takes Naruto a moment to realize Neji’s talking about the mysterious redheaded woman he keeps hearing about, the one Sai told them Kakashi-sensei picked up a few weeks back. He knows he’s probably not supposed to, but he can’t help empathizing with her, Neji’s words also reminding him of his fight with Sasuke in the Valley of the End. Just thinking about it gets him curling a fist in his hospital gown opposite his heart. Shikamaru’s breath catches at the sight, and it’s not lost on Neji either. Maybe, when he sees Granny Tsunade next, he can convince her to let him see this girl or have her brought to him if he still can’t walk by then. He’d at least like to let her know she’s not <em>alone</em>…</p><p>“My <em>point</em> is,” Neji says, quieter and calmer now, snapping Naruto out of his thoughts, “you are the <em>farthest</em> thing from a loser.” The blond blinks, and Neji smirks a bit. “If you ask me, you’re a genius.”</p><p>Naruto does a double-take. “W-wait, <em>what</em>?! Did you hit your head during training or something, ponytail?! I was dead-last in the Academy, and I had to cheat to know a single answer on the Chunin Exam! I'm the farthest thing in the world from a genius!”</p><p>Neji, collected as ever, just breathes a laugh. “By most standards, perhaps. But your unorthodox strategies in the heat of battle are extremely formidable and, most importantly, your <em>emotional</em> intelligence is off the charts.” He raises an eyebrow, his smirk growing and softening at once. “There’s more than one kind of genius, you know.”</p><p>Naruto just stares in disbelief, a bright blush creeping up his ears.</p><p>“He’s got a point, Naruto,” Shikamaru encourages, grinning at the blond like he doesn’t have a doubt in his mind (because he doesn’t).</p><p>“Y-you, too, Shikamaru?” He’s pretty sure he’s started sweating from the pressure. “You guys are giving me <em>way</em> too much credit…”</p><p>Neji chuckles, a soft, proud smile on his face. “On the contrary, I’d say this is just one more thing that’s long overdue.” He looks out at the clear sky as two birds fly past the window. “You know, someone once once told me that destiny is not a matter of chance, it’s a matter of <em>choice</em>. It’s not a thing to be waited for, but a thing to be <em>achieved</em>.” The blond’s eyes widen, and Neji comes back to meet them, sure and grounding. “The destiny you’ve chosen to achieve is the tile of Hokage.” Reaching out, he taps twice under Naruto’s chin and grins. “So keep your chin up. We’re all behind you, every step of the way.”</p><p>Naruto blinks a moment, then beams right back. “You got it!”</p><hr/><p>Outside, about half an hour earlier, Gai and his two remaining students are just leaving the hospital grounds when he senses a familiar presence in the tree just outside Naruto’s window. Glancing over his shoulder, a small smile comes to his face. Perfect timing! He’s been wanting to talk to him for a while!</p><p>“Lee, Tenten, you two can get home on your own, can’t you?”</p><p>His students stop and turn to him curiously. “Is something the matter, sensei?” Lee asks, concerned.</p><p>Gai shakes his head, a bright grin on his face. “No, Lee! The exact opposite, in fact!” His students tilt their heads as one, even more confused now. “I just need to take care of something, and I <em>can’t wait</em> to get started!”</p><p>Lee blinks, and then realization dawns. He strikes his palm with his fist in an <em>Aha!</em> gesture. “<em>Oh</em>!” He brightens. “You mean like a new training regimen, sensei?!”</p><p>Gai chuckles. “I suppose you could call it that!”</p><p>Lee lights up, eyes shining, fists balled excitedly at half-mast. “Then you should get started right away! Do not let us hold you up!” He turns to Tenten with a polite bow. “Please, Tenten, allow me to ensure you get home safely!”</p><p>Tenten flushes at her teammate’s gentlemanly offer, a shy smile blooming. “O-okay, sure. Thanks, Lee. You’re sweet.”</p><p>Straightening, Lee beams. “Perfect! Then I hope you will also allow me to make a training exercise out of it!”</p><p>She doesn’t have time to respond before he scoops her into his arms, her own winding around his neck reflexively. “<em>Ah</em>—w-wait, Lee, this isn’t what I—!”</p><p>“What are we waiting for? <em>Let us go</em>!”</p><p>He takes off at breakneck speed down the street, Tenten yelping and holding on for dear life. Gai chuckles and watches until he can’t see them anymore. They really are good kids…</p><p>Then, he turns back to the matter at hand. “Come on out, eternal rival! I know you’re there!”</p><p>Kakashi phases in beside him a moment later, looking a bit sheepish as he rubs the back of his head. “I’d ask how you knew it was me, but I should know I can’t hide from you.”</p><p>Gai just laughs and flashes a thumbs up. “You’re absolutely right!” Glancing back at the tree, Gai tilts his head. “But Kakashi…why <em>were</em> you hiding in that tree in the first place?”</p><p>Kakashi takes a breath and shrugs, but he doesn’t look away like he usually might. “Well, I hadn’t seen you since you left on that training mission with your kids, so I thought I’d check in, make sure you all got back okay.”</p><p>Gai just stares for a moment, blinking owlishly, then curls his fingers at his lips and scrutinizes his lifelong friend and rival. Not that it’s unusual for Kakashi to check in on his friends and their kids in his own way, particularly after long or hard missions (he’s kind of a Mother Hen that way), but still. This is…different. Gai leans in so close that it more than breaks Kakashi’s personal bubble. “Gai, what are you doing?” he finally asks.</p><p>Giving him space, Gai eyes Kakashi, expression serious. “Something’s different about you.” Not wanting him to get the wrong idea, he raises placating hands. “<em>Good</em> different, but…still. You seem…lighter, less burdened. Like a big weight’s been lifted off your shoulders.”</p><p>Kakashi nods. There’s no sense in denying it, and he’s not surprised that Gai noticed the change in him so quickly. It’s just how they work, how they’ve always worked. Knowing Gai won’t rest until he knows more, Kakashi raises a hand to stop him and glances back at Naruto’s window. “Not here,” he tells him quietly and starts leading the way down the street.</p><p>Gai follows without question, falling into step beside him, a comfortable, companionable silence settling between them. Their relationship is known for its loud boasts and ridiculous challenges, but they have their quieter moments, too. This is just one of them. Kakashi stops for flowers on the way, two meticulously chosen bouquets they both know by heart, and when they arrive at their destination, Gai’s not the least bit surprised.</p><p>The Leaf Village Cemetery.</p><p>Gai stays at the entrance and turns his back while Kakashi talks to Rin and Obito first, wanting to give him privacy. They were his friends, too, sure, but Gai knows Kakashi’s relationship with his teammates was special, something he’ll never be able to get back or replace, so he wants him to have as much time with them as he needs.</p><p>He can’t make out the words he’s saying, but from the tone of his voice, Gai can’t help but notice that Kakashi sounds…happier and freer than he has in…<em>so</em> many years. Maybe since…since he lost them, Minato, and Kushina…maybe since he lost his <em>father</em>, even. It sends a shiver down Gai’s spine and a pang through his chest, and he clenches his fists and bows his head as tears sting and fall. He’s…he’s just so…<em>happy</em>…! If anyone deserves some respite…if anyone deserves to be <em>happy</em> and free of guilt and pain and strife after everything he’s been through…it’s <em>Kakashi</em>…! He’s lost count of how many times he’s <em>prayed</em> for this over the years…!</p><p>Once Kakashi’s finally done about half an hour later, he invites Gai over to sit at the Memorial Stone with him. It’s quiet for a long few minutes, but Gai doesn’t mind. He knows Kakashi. He’ll talk when he’s ready. Besides, when it comes down to it? He’d wait forever if it meant he’d know the reason for such a profound change in his eternal rival—and, in his heart, his best friend.</p><p>“I told Naruto the truth.”</p><p>Gai raises an eyebrow, intrigued. “Truth? About what?”</p><p>Kakashi hums. “Oh…just about the Nine Tails, his parents, and Obito and Rin.”</p><p>Gai stares a moment before reeling back and shouting, “You <em>what</em>?!”</p><p>Kakashi slaps a hand over his mouth and puts a warning finger to his lips. “Keep your voice down!” he hisses.</p><p>He removes his hand, and Gai complies. “You wanna run that by me again, Kakashi?”</p><p>The silver-haired man looks back out toward the entrance, Obito’s name at his back and Rin’s grave at his front. He shrugs. “There’s not much to tell, really. I told him everything Lord Third ever kept from him.”</p><p>Gai blinks and has to work at getting out the next word. “<em>And</em>…?”</p><p>The genius chuckles as he remembers his student’s reaction, a softly-delighted smile on his face. “Well, how would anyone react, hearing something like that? To finally know who his parents were and learn everything he could about them, I mean. He was <em>thrilled</em>! He was really excited to hear about Obito and Rin, too.” His smile shrinks a bit as he recalls the next part, voice lowering as well. “He cried a lot, of course, when he heard exactly <em>how</em> and <em>why</em> he became an orphan and the Nine Tails was sealed inside him,” he swallows; Naruto’s compassion really is astounding, “even more so when he heard how Rin and Obito died...”</p><p>After another moment, his smile slips completely, and he sighs, suddenly looking and sounding much older than his mere thirty years. Gai doesn’t miss it, just holds his breath in anticipation of why. “The way he reacted to Rin’s death, especially…” He mimics the way Naruto curled his fist in his shirt opposite his heart, and Gai’s breath hitches. Kakashi nods. “It was…<em>hard</em>…and that’s putting it mildly…” He rakes that hand through his hair and huffs a laugh, but it’s bitter and maybe the tiniest bit choked. “And you know the worst part…?” His voice is a smidgen shaky. “<em>I</em> was the one who taught Sasuke that move…”</p><p>Gai tries to hold himself back from saying anything, he really does, but he can’t. This is <em>Kakashi</em> they’re talking about! “But Kakashi, you couldn’t have known—!”</p><p>“I told him it’s <em>not</em> a move to use against a <em>comrade</em>,” Kakashi’s voice is soft, but biting, his eye, too, “and yet, he still…” He clenches a fist till the fabric around it groans. “I had to <em>watch</em> as my former student nearly <em>killed</em> my…” His knuckles crack, gritted teeth creak, and Gai swears his heart almost stops when a tear splatters on his fist. He’s…Kakashi hasn’t cried since…! “I was <em>right there</em>, Gai, but I—” his voice gives out, and Gai’s heart aches, “—I couldn’t…! I should’ve done <em>more</em>…!”</p><p>Gai doesn’t say anything this time, even though he wants to more than anything. He knows Kakashi has to get this out. He doesn’t move either, just stays right where he is. He knows staying close helps Kakashi the most when things get like this. Kakashi buries his face in his hands, and he’s the only one not (quite) surprised to find a couple tears sneaking from between his fingers a moment later. “It was…” a small whine escapes, “…it was like Rin all over again…”</p><p>Gai hates just watching, not being able to help like he wants, but he knows this is better for Kakashi. At least, it always has been before. But…but come to think of it, Kakashi’s different now, and he’s never been averse to his touch, so…maybe… Hesitating a good few moments, Gai slowly reaches out to rest a feather-light, tentative hand on Kakashi’s shoulder, and to his immense surprise, Kakashi actually <em>relaxes</em>, some of the tension bleeding from his taut frame. A shaky sigh leaves him, too, and Gai will take it as a small victory.</p><p>It’s what gives him the courage to do this, too. “Kakashi…” he squeezes his shoulder, “…you taught Sasuke your Lightning Blade to protect himself and his comrades. It’s an incredible move that only <em>you’d</em> been able to use before that.” A small smile comes, a fond chuckle with it. “It feels amazing when a student masters your jutsu, doesn’t it? It’s like a piece of us will always live on in them.”</p><p>Kakashi seems apprehensive on principle, but he can’t quite stop himself from nodding. “At…at the time…I was so proud of him…”</p><p>Gai nods in turn. “As you should have been.” A heartbeat, two. “But you didn’t know then that things would go this way. None of us did. None of us <em>could have</em>. Your student turned his back on all of us and the Leaf, and he used the jutsu <em>you</em> taught him to do the unthinkable.” He grits his teeth, clenches his free fist. “I…I can’t imagine how that must feel. It’s…if Lee or Neji or Tenten ever…” He swallows, shuddering and feeling sick at the images it brings. Shaking his head to clear it, he focuses back on Kakashi. “You did your best to keep Sasuke on the right path, but it’s not your fault he rejected those teachings. It’s not your fault you couldn’t stop or get between him and Naruto during their fight. Heck, if you’d gotten hurt, too, or worse, who knows how much worse things could have been? One or both of you might have died, and you <em>know</em> Naruto would never forgive himself.” Kakashi swallows thickly, but he knows he’s right. He nods again, stealing Gai’s breath when he leans into his touch, inches a bit closer. Gai’s voice lowers and gentles of its own accord. “You’re not wrong to wish things were different. You’re not wrong to feel guilty, even if I wish you wouldn’t. Everything you’re feeling, it’s <em>all</em> <em>right</em>, Kakashi. I swear it is.”</p><p>Kakashi sniffs. A few more tears have fallen by now, but he thinks he’s just about done. He takes a deep, if shaky, breath, ears perking when Gai keeps going. “I’m sure you told Naruto how proud you are of him for finally leaving Sasuke behind, right? For focusing on the ones who love him more than anything and would fight tooth and nail for him?”</p><p>Kakashi finally lets his hands fall and wipes his eye on his gloves. “O-of course. It’s how I really feel, after all…” His eye moves toward the darkening sky. The stars will be out soon. “It’s for the best. I think we all know that.”</p><p>Gai nods. “And Naruto knows it now, too. He’s still grappling with his decision, and I suspect it may take some time for him to really let Sasuke go, <em>if</em> he ever can completely. But you were <em>there</em> for him when he needed you…” he squeezes Kakashi’s shoulder and softens, prouder than ever to be his rival, his <em>friend</em>, “…so there’s no need to beat yourself up anymore. You’ve done <em>well</em>, Kakashi.”</p><p>That wording reminds him of what Naruto told him during his breakdown, and Kakashi’s smile grows. “I hope…I hope you’re right…” Reaching up, he rests his fingers on Gai’s. “<em>Thank you</em>, Gai…”</p><p>Inwardly sighing heavily with relief, Gai beams, so happy to have helped that tears gather at the corners of his eyes. “Any time, Kakashi! You know that!”</p><p>Kakashi chuckles, already feeling better. He and Naruto really are good at that. “Right back at you.”</p><p>Of course, that just makes what Gai said before come back to the forefront, and Kakashi can’t help but laugh a touch more. “That kid…” Curious to know what’s on his mind now, Gai listens closely. “He’s so young and has faced so many hardships of his own…but all Naruto wants is to take away <em>others’</em> pain…” He smiles softly up at the beautiful dusk sky. “It’s almost like that’s why he was put here on this Earth, to heal all of our broken hearts so we’d love him in return…” He doesn’t stop himself from melting like nothing else. “I’m his teacher, but I…I <em>broke</em> <em>down</em> in his arms and…he held me like I was the most precious thing in the world to him… He said, ‘You’ve done enough, you can <em>rest</em> now’ and…gave me closure that I…<em>never</em> thought I’d get until the day I died…”</p><p>He breathes a laugh, thinking about how <em>proud</em> Minato-sensei and Kushina would be of their boy. “He really is extraordinary…”</p><p>Gai smiles, a quiet chuckle of his own leaving him. “Yeah…but I’d say even <em>that’s</em> an understatement. He’s got us all wrapped around his finger.” He nudges Kakashi with his elbow, a teasing glint to his grin. “Something you and your pretty nails would know all about, wouldn’t you, <em>Kakashi</em>?”</p><p>Kakashi stiffens, reeling back, a bright blush on his face, but he doesn’t bother to hide his nails. He’s already been found out, and anyway, he has nothing to hide from Gai. “H-how did you know it was him?!”</p><p>Gai just barks a laugh and raises an eyebrow with a smirk, jabbing at himself with his thumb. “Who <em>else</em> could make you do something like that besides <em>me</em> for our challenges?” He rests his chin between his knuckles, all too eager to know the details. “<em>So</em>…? How’d he convince you?”</p><p>Kakashi looks away, blushing to his ears. “He…he <em>smiled</em> at me…”</p><p>Gai’s eyes widen. He blinks. Given a moment, he <em>immediately</em> starts cackling, unable to help himself at the very idea of the great Kakashi Hatake being swayed by a child’s <em>smile</em>, of all things!</p><p>Kakashi pouts for a few seconds, but Gai’s laughter turns infectious, just like always, and he finds himself chuckling, too. “S-Sai came and painted everyone’s nails…and Naruto was so <em>happy</em> with his…!” He laughs harder upon remembering <em>just</em> how happy he was, eyes shining and all, which just sends Gai into an even bigger laughing fit. “H-how could I—say no—to <em>that</em> <em>face</em>?!” Gai’s laughing so hard that he’s holding his stomach, tears falling, and Kakashi isn’t far behind, already having to brace himself on the monument’s base. “Y-you—would have been—p-powerless, too…!” He pauses for a few moments to try to get his words and breath back, but it proves impossible. For the first time in a while, he doesn’t mind. “I-I <em>know</em> <em>you</em>…G-Gai…!”</p><p>In the end, Kakashi has to stop talking altogether because the laughter takes over, so much that a few tears actually sneak out. Gai’s fallen back on the monument’s base, their laughter echoing through the cemetery. It’s been a long time since they’ve laughed like this, really gotten to let go. It feels…amazing, like just what they needed.</p><p>When they finally calm down enough to compose themselves several minutes later, Gai sets a solid hand on Kakashi’s shoulder again and smiles so much, his cheeks actually hurt. A few more tears, unrelated to the laughing, cling to his eyelashes. “It’s good to have you back, Kakashi!”</p><p>
  <em>The Kakashi I grew up with!</em>
</p><p>
  <strong> <em>My best friend.</em> </strong>
</p><p>Kakashi doesn’t miss the silent sentiment underneath it all, and he can’t help but beam, something else that nearly stops Gai’s heart, the happy tears at the corners of his eye besides. “It’s good to be back!” Setting his hand on top of Gai’s, he looks at him seriously. This is something he’s done his best to tell him in his own way over the years, but now he thinks he can finally say it out loud. “Listen, Gai…I <em>truly</em> find it reassuring having you there…and I <em>hope</em> you always will be.” He squeezes gently. “We’ll always be rivals, you’ll always be my best friend, and <em>that</em> will never change.”</p><p>Gai, tears fit to burst already, throws his arms around his friend’s neck to hug him tightly, crying happy tears into his shoulder. “<em>Kakashi</em>…!”</p><p>Kakashi just laughs, reaching up to hold his wrist and wrap an arm around him in turn, which just makes the other man even more emotional. Gaze finding the sky just as the stars are starting to come out, Kakashi can’t help but think of Naruto again. He’s the only reason this breakthrough of his was possible…</p><p>He smiles.</p><p><em>Thank you</em>, Naruto…</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>The chapter title refers to Neji's comment about Naruto's eyes from the Sasuke Retrieval arc, "Sometimes your eyes are even better than mine" (<i>Naruto</i>, Episode 115, "Your Opponent is Me!") and how Naruto so easily sees into others' hearts!</p><p>I dropped a few more background Kankuro/Tenten hints because I can (also some Lee/Tenten because even though KankuTen is confirmed for this fic, I'm multiship trash), lol, so if you enjoyed those, great! If not, feel free to ignore! ;)</p><p>Neji's reference to Sasuke being lost in darkness also comes from his line in the same ep: "Wherever he is, Sasuke is in the darkness." (Naruto's reflection on it and agreement comes in <i>Naruto</i>, Episode 131, "Enlightenment! The Secret of the Mangekyo Sharingan!": "Neji...it's just like you said! Sasuke is in this depths of darkness right now!")</p><p>Kakashi's line to Gai toward the end comes from <i>Shippuden</i> episode 219, "The Hokage Kakashi Hatake": "We'll always be rivals, and <i>that</i> will never change. Listen, Gai, I <i>truly</i> find it reassuring having you there, and I <i>hope</i> you always will be." (Obviously, I added the best friend part. And to be clear on that, I meant that Gai will always be Kakashi's living best friend. Lol. Obito was his best friend growing up, even if Kakashi didn't admit it to himself until it was too late.)</p><p>Gai's comforting 'It's okay to wish things were different, it's okay if you feel guilty, I swear it is' lines are inspired by Tohru Honda's to Kyo Sohma in the <i>Fruits Basket</i> reboot's s1e10, "It's Valentine's, After All!": "It's <i>okay</i> if you don't like him. Really... ...It's <i>fine</i> if you can't. It's <i>fine</i> if you hate him. It <i>really</i> is."</p><p>The quote Neji says at the end of his Naruto moment is something a friend (<b>GreenHunter05 on our KidgeonPost Discord</b>) showed me and I thought fit nicely with the things Naruto told Neji during their Chunin Exam final fight: "Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved." – William Jennings Bryan</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0014"><h2>14. Loose Ends, New Starts</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>Naruto tells his last two precious people about his decision, and his first talk(s) with the Nine Tails open up some potential new doors.</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Merry Christmas, my beloved readers (if you celebrate it - if not, happy whatever you do celebrate)! So sorry this took for <i>freaking ever</i> (longest wait between updates yet, LMAO)! I actually meant to have this up weeks ago, and I've <i>been</i> working on it every second I could for around a month and a half, but I swear my jobs want to kill me! lol. Hopefully it's okay, I've edited it several times! Thank you <i>so much</i> for being so patient with me! Longest chapter yet (13.2k+), woo!</p><p><i>Note:</i> Part of the reason I was a bit slow to update this was because I actually started a small Naruto side project, a different AU entirely (five chapters posted so far), called <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27552421/chapters/67389025">Chasing Sunlight</a>! I'd <i>love</i> to hear your thoughts on it as well! It's actually one of a good <b>almost-dozen or so</b> Naruto side projects I have coming, so if you'd like to keep up with those, please feel free to subscribe to me as an author! Excited for all of them, so would <i>love</i> to hear what you think about all of them as they come out!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When the messenger hawk first taps on Naruto's hospital room window, Shikamaru thinks it's lost. Why else would it go here and not to the Aviary? But then, he looks a little closer and recognizes the subtle markings. It's not Takamaru, the Hidden Sand's fastest, but it's still one of Gaara's best, Takahara.</p><p>It's been five days since Gaara, Temari, and Kankuro left the Leaf to head home. It should have only taken them three days to get there, but if they'd run into the sandstorm… Depending on how long it lasted, too, it could have delayed Gaara sending the bird even once they got back. Plus, since it wasn't an emergency, he probably didn't want to worry anyone by sending a faster bird, so it makes sense that it would take a little longer. In any case, he can't keep the pleased grin off his face as he glances over at a still-snoozing Naruto. He'll be thrilled!</p><p>Getting up and moving to open the window as quietly as he can, Shikamaru takes the message and thanks Takahara with a few respectful strokes before sending him off to the Aviary for a well-earned rest.</p><p>As he settles down to read, he finds his guess wasn't far off the mark at all. The Sand siblings got back home a bit later than planned, by more than a full day. They only got back late afternoon yesterday. They got caught in the earlier-than-predicted sandstorm about halfway through their trip back, so they had to hunker down when things were at their worst. Gaara's sand protected them the rest of the way, and they eventually made it home safely. Like Shikamaru thought, Gaara opted to send one of their faster (but not fast<em>est</em>) messenger hawks so Naruto wouldn't worry.</p><p>Once he finishes rereading to make sure he didn't miss anything important, Shikamaru allows himself a silent sigh. He's just relieved everyone got back okay. Peering down at the end of the message again, he chuckles. Temari and Kankuro left their own little notes there, mostly telling Naruto to take care of himself or his adoptive siblings would have his knuckle-head. They, namely Temari, also make sure to tell Shikamaru to take it easy and not be afraid to ask for a day off one of these days. The brunet can't help but laugh a little more at that. She (and Kankuro, but mostly her) must know how unlikely it is that he'll ever actually do that. There's no way he's leaving Naruto. Not because he feels obligated or he thinks Naruto can't take care of himself either, just…frankly speaking, he doesn't <em>want</em> to be anywhere else. He's perfectly content to stay right here at his side, now and as long as he'll have him. And really, knowing Temari as well as he does and Kankuro as well as he's starting to, he's sure they know that, too. But still, he appreciates their concern nonetheless.</p><p>Looking over at the clock tells him it's 11 AM. Naruto's been waking up at different times all throughout his recovery, so it's hard to tell exactly when he'll come to, but he supposes he can draw up a potential reply to Gaara and company while he waits. Knowing Naruto, he'll want to add a few things, so he leaves some space for him to write at the bottom.</p><p>About an hour later, Naruto finally starts waking up just as Shikamaru is finishing his <em>Thanks for worrying about me, Mother Hen, but I'm all right, I promise – IF I need the day off, I'll think about it</em> response to Temari, offering a similar one to Kankuro. Because, honestly, that really is the best he can give, and she might not like it, but he knows she'll respect it. (Their next penpal letters are going to be interesting…)</p><p>Setting down his ink brush, Shikamaru smiles easily. "Mornin', sunshine!"</p><p>Rubbing the sleep from his eyes, Naruto chuckles and brightens at the new nickname. Shikamaru helps him sit up a little more and then picks up Gaara's letter. He waves it with a smirk. "You'll never guess what came while you were out!"</p><p>But Naruto, being Naruto, immediately recognizes Gaara's handwriting and gasps, lighting up. "Gaara's letter!"</p><p>Shikamaru nods with an affirmative hum and hands it over, softening at how gently Naruto takes it. Knowing him, he'll keep it with the bow and wrapping paper scrap and small bag from the Sand siblings' birthday presents, the be-back-soon note from him and Ino's get-well tag, too. Honestly, with how sentimental he is, he's lucky he's not some kind of hoarder. "It came a little over an hour ago, but I wanted you to get your rest. I hope you don't mind that I read it and started a reply back."</p><p>Naruto shakes his head. "Of course not, that's great! Thanks, Shikamaru!"</p><p>Shikamaru breathes a laugh and shrugs. "Hey, no need to thank me. It's what I'm here for."</p><p>Naruto chuckles as well and grins a little more. "I know, but I'm still gonna thank you anyway!"</p><p>With that, he starts reading, melting at Gaara's pretty handwriting and the poetic way he talks. They're familiar, and he finds it comforting somehow, even when he's so far away.</p><p>Shikamaru, meanwhile, can't help but observe.</p><p>Naruto really has no idea how…<em>sweet</em> he is, does he? Keeping notes like these, thanking him for starting a reply to one of his best friend's letters… Those aren't things most people do, things anyone else would <em>think</em> to do, but…<em>he</em> does, and he doesn't even have to think about it. It's just…part of him, who he is, this innate sentimentality and kindness and <em>love</em>…</p><p>Not for the first time, he wonders how in the world the villagers didn't see any of this in him growing up. Or, more likely, he's sure they did, they <em>must</em> have, so he wonders how they could <em>ignore</em> it, try to silence it, even work to snuff it out as hard as they did. Hell, they're lucky they didn't kill it completely. If anything…it just reaffirms to Shikamaru how incredibly fortunate they are that things weren't different, that Naruto and Gaara weren't in each other's place.</p><p>Naruto snickers at Temari and Kankuro's notes at the end, mostly the parts about Shikamaru, turning the letter his way and pointing. "Sounds like <em>you're</em> getting clucked at, Shikamaru!" he teases.</p><p>Shikamaru scoffs, but he's smirking fondly the whole time. "Yeah, yeah. Laugh all you want, but they called <em>you</em> a knucklehead."</p><p>"That doesn't count, and you know it!"</p><p>"Oh, yeah, who says?"</p><p>"I do! Everybody calls me that, even you!"</p><p>He snorts. "You're ridiculous!"</p><p>Naruto sticks out his tongue. "I aim to please!"</p><p>Once Naruto's finished writing his replies, Shikamaru seals their letter and whistles at the window. Takahara flies back, lets him secure their message, and then hurries off to make the journey home.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em>KRACKKKKHHHHH!</em>
</p><p>About an hour later, both boys jump at the sudden loud noise of what sounds like an old door creaking open from outside. Shikamaru is instantly on his feet and hovering by Naruto, ready and waiting to use his shadows if need be. Meanwhile, Naruto's gaze is fixed on the window. He <em>knows</em> he knows that sound, but he can't quite place it…!</p><p>The sound stops as a familiar face appears at the window, and Naruto gasps, brightening. "Captain Yamato!"</p><p>Shikamaru drops back into his chair with a relieved sigh before turning to his friend. "What <em>was</em> that?"</p><p>Naruto blinks at him, equally confused, and then he remembers. "Oh, yeah, that's right! You don't know 'im very well, do you?" He waves at the older man and motions to tell him the window's open, then looks back at Shikamaru. "Captain Yamato has Wood-style jutsu, and it makes that sound sometimes when he uses it." He chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck. "I thought I recognized it, but it took me a minute. Sorry…"</p><p>Shikamaru just smiles, letting the remaining tension bleed from his shoulders as he shakes his head. "It's fine. I'm just glad we're not under attack or something." For a second there, he thought it was the Akatsuki and his strategy skills were losing their edge.</p><p>Captain Yamato pushes the window open and hops inside. "Sorry about that, boys," he says, calling off the big branch he'd grown to get over to the window. He rubs the back of his head sheepishly. "Occasionally, the older the trees are, the noisier they are, so…"</p><p>Naruto shakes his head a few times, grinning happily. "Don't be, it's okay!" He laughs at himself. "You'd think I would've recognized that sound sooner!"</p><p>Shikamaru nods in agreement, an easy smile playing. "Long as we're fine, no harm done."</p><p>Yamato sighs in relief. "Good. Thank you."</p><p>With that out of the way, Yamato's attention shifts entirely to Naruto. He starts looking him over, trying to take stock of his condition (even though he's checked in with Kakashi a thousand times). Something about it, the eyes on him and the expression on his face, the intensity of it all, makes the boy squirm. He feels…small, like a little kid again. Shikamaru notices the change in him immediately and sits up a little straighter. Curling a light fist in the sheets for purchase, Naruto looks away.</p><p>"Are you…are you mad at me?" he asks softly.</p><p>Captain Yamato comes out of his cataloging to blink wide eyes and tilt his head like Naruto's spoken another language. Frowning, especially at the way Naruto seems to shrink away from him a little more for it, his eyebrows draw together in perplexed concern. "For what, Naruto?" he replies, careful to keep his voice low and gentle.</p><p>The youngest bites his lip. It's hard to get out, worried what his friend and mentor will say, but he knows he owes it to him. "You were with me…right before everything went down… I…I tricked you…" the words are like lead on his tongue, the weight of them settling on his chest, and he curls his fists a little tighter in pushing past it, "…with—with a clone and…ran off to help Sakura and Kakashi-sensei..." Staring holes into the floor, he swallows, and the sheets in his hold groan. While he's mostly held himself back till now to let them hash this out, Shikamaru can't stop himself from reaching over to to rest a hand on his. Naruto's grip relaxes some, and his breathing eases, too. "I…I knew Sakura was up to something, a-and I figured it had to do with Sasuke since…she hadn't been herself, you know? And I knew Kakashi-sensei would be there, too, because…" fondness flits across his face for a brief second, "…that's just how he is…"</p><p>He takes a calming breath, and then slowly brings his eyes back to the older man before gesturing to himself. "For all <em>this</em>?" The smile Naruto bears is small and sad and even a bit fearful, another thing his friends don't like to see. "I wouldn't…blame you if you were, for the record…"</p><p>Yamato <em>wants</em> to smile at him. He <em>wants</em> to act like everything's fine. But…he knows that would just make Naruto feel worse (Kakashi told him about the first time Sasuke almost killed Naruto, when Sakura pretended everything was fine – it didn't end well), and that's the <em>last</em> thing he wants. So, instead, he just takes his own breath and a moment to gather his thoughts. He wants to say this the right way…</p><p>Once he thinks he's found it a few minutes later, he comes to sit at the foot of Naruto's bed. Naruto just watches him closely, not wanting to push his luck. He learned the hard way what that would get him as a kid (and while he knows he's <em>safe</em> with Captain Yamato, that habit is still a hard thing to break). Seeing a flicker of that haunted look he hates so much, Shikamaru squeezes his hand, and Naruto flips his over so he can thread their fingers together and squeeze right back. He appreciates his support right now more than anything.</p><p>Finally, the oldest sighs. "Honestly, Naruto, I'm only angry about two things." Naruto waits on bated breath, watching as Yamato clenches a fist while he glares down at Naruto's legs. "What Sasuke did to you," blazing black finds calming blue, "and that I couldn't be there to help."</p><p>Naruto can only stare for a few seconds before his lips part slightly in shock. He thought…he thought for <em>sure</em> that Captain Yamato would be angry with him… <em>Shouldn't</em> he be…? Instead, he's… "But…but Captain Yamato, you don't have anything to be sorry for!" Because he knows that's what Yamato means, that guilt is clawing at <em>him</em>, too. "<em>I</em> was the one who tricked <em>you</em>, remember?" He winces at the memory again, then hurries to clarify, raising his free hand placatingly, "Not that I <em>wanted</em> to, but I knew you'd stop me if I told you the truth…" Yamato nods. He most definitely would have.</p><p>Naruto swallows. Yamato just wanted to keep him <em>safe</em>, and despite how things might have looked, he really <em>is</em> grateful! Hearing it from him just makes Naruto even more determined to make him feel better. And luckily, he thinks he knows just the way to do that. If there's one thing he knows about Yamato, it's how much he respects and adores Kakashi. "And even <em>Kakashi-sensei</em> couldn't help, and he was there the whole time, you know? Trust me, he felt really guilty, too, but just like I told him, it's <em>not</em> your fault. I <em>promise</em> you that."</p><p>Yamato blinks at that, at how earnest he is, but can't help but smile and flush a tiny bit in the end. Figures the kid would know the best way to get through to him… He's a bit too easy to read when it comes to his idol, but sue him. Considering he partially grew up in the Foundation, he'll take that as a good thing.</p><p>Naruto's relieved that his idea worked, and he offers a tiny smile of his own, but he falters a moment later as his guilt surges back in. Shikamaru can't help comparing him to a kicked puppy, and he holds his hand a little tighter. Naruto flashes him a minuscule smile, and the brunet passes a stronger one back. When he promised he wasn't going anywhere, he <em>meant</em> it. The change isn't lost on Yamato either, so he's already waiting when blue eyes double back.</p><p>"But still…" Naruto bows as low as he can, "…I'm so <em>sorry</em>, Captain Yamato," he says softly. "I…I didn't think things would go like that, I <em>swear</em>…not that that's any excuse. Maybe I still couldn't have told you, but…I-I should have had my clone <em>apologize</em> before he disappeared, at least." He swallows. "I…I <em>never</em> meant to hurt or worry you like that… I'm <em>so</em> sorry…"</p><p>Yamato can only stare for a moment before scooting closer, a fond as hell smile finally coming as he gazes down at Naruto. He breathes a laugh, unable to help himself. Seriously, this kid… He's <em>ridiculous</em>, but in the very best kind of way!</p><p>He reaches out to rest a gentle hand on the boy's head, ruffling his hair. Naruto's eyes snap open. Captain Yamato's never done this before… Not about to pass it up, though, he leans up into it, a touch hesitantly, then as much as he wants when he's not pushed away. Another quiet laugh leaves the man, some pain it, too, because he knows where that hesitance comes from, but it just makes the adoration in his chest burn hotter still. "I won't say it's okay because you gave me a heart attack times <em>five</em>, you little jerk."</p><p>Naruto looks up to find a smirk, of all things, on his face, though he cringes and flashes another apologetic look his way at the words themselves.</p><p>Taking a deep breath, Yamato scrubs a hand down his face in letting it out. "When your clone disappeared and I found out you'd run off, I was so worried. I looked everywhere, and when I finally figured out where you'd gone, the ANBU at the bridge told me what happened. I rushed back to the village as fast as I could. You were out of surgery by then, but there were still so many unknowns…" He closes his eyes momentarily and shakes his head, not wanting to remember. "I checked on you every chance I could…"</p><p>Naruto glances over at Shikamaru for confirmation. He nods. The guy almost never popped in the room itself, usually hovered in the tree outside (learned that from Kakashi, he'd guess), but Shikamaru always sensed him out there. He definitely came by as often as possible.</p><p>Blue eyes drift back to Yamato. Knowing that warms Naruto's heart, but he keeps quiet for now, just dutifully waits for the rest, and Yamato can't help but melt a little more. He remembers when he got the news that Naruto was going to be all right. He'd been trying to help the ANBU find a trace of Sasuke or that masked man (supposedly Madara Uchiha, they know now, according to at-last finalized reports from the Five Kage Summit, but the truth of that still remains to be seen) when a messenger hawk had dropped off a message from Lady Tsunade. He swears he's never been so relieved.</p><p>Feeling that relief sweep over him again in seeing the object of the last few weeks' anxiety awake and all right, he lets himself lean forward to rest his head on Naruto's shoulder, going slowly in case the boy isn't comfortable with that and wants to back out. But honestly, he should have known, even expected, that the kid'd welcome it, which just makes Yamato feel more at ease as well. "In the end, you made me fear for your safety. That's true." Closing tired eyes, he sighs, and his voice lowers. "<em>But</em>…I'm just so happy you're <em>safe</em>, Naruto…"</p><p>Naruto is shocked, but touched, too, and he doesn't miss that last part's parallel to Kakashi-sensei's first lesson and Ninja Way's sentence structure. He wonders if Yamato even knows he did that. Hell, he thinks <em>he's</em> spent too much time around Pervy Sage and his manuscripts if he's thinking something like <em>that</em> (he's joking, of course – there will <em>never</em> be enough time, and what he wouldn't give to have what time he did have back…). He's not used to the older man being this affectionate and open with him, but he takes it to mean they're getting closer, becoming better friends. He beams, heart trilling in his chest. Resting his own head against Yamato's shoulder, he follows his mentor in closing his eyes. "<em>Thank you</em>, Captain…for everything."</p><p>Yamato breathes another laugh, smile coming back tenfold. He buries his hand in bright blond hair. "<em>Always</em>, Naruto. You never have to question that."</p><p>They stay like that for a good few minutes, Shikamaru just watching them warmly. Honestly… He may not know this Yamato guy too well, but he clearly loves Naruto, and if he makes Naruto happy, too, then that's good enough for him. Knowing what's coming after this as well, he's glad that Naruto's just about done telling everyone he needs to tell about his Sasuke decision. There's only maybe one other person he can think of who needs to be told directly, and that's more of a courtesy and duty as an honorary big brother than an actual need. But he knows Naruto will want to tell him anyway, so he hopes he shows up soon. Actually, he's pretty surprised he hasn't come by already, but it could be that he's on a mission or something. It's not like he really keeps tabs on the kid, after all.</p><p>When the two finally separate, Naruto fixes Yamato with a determined stare. "I promise I'll <em>never</em> do anything like that again. You have my word."</p><p>Yamato blinks at the change in atmosphere and tone, the bone-deep certainty in it, and something in him wants to know more. "Kakashi and Sai said you'd want to tell me something important, but they wouldn't tell me what."</p><p>It's a statement, not a question, permission to go ahead, and Naruto nods, though it's not lost on Yamato how much <em>less</em> confident he looks than just a second ago. Blue eyes dull, lips purse white, and he curls in on himself, but Shikamaru reaches over to set a comforting, steadfast hand on his shoulder. The small smile that instantly blooms, how Naruto's entire being lights up from the inside out at just that one little touch, how seeing his smile makes <em>Shikamaru</em> smile, too… Yamato looks between the two boys before settling back on Naruto with a secret smile of his own. He'll have a good laugh about this with Kakashi later. Naruto takes a deep breath and brings brighter eyes back to his mentor. "It's…it's about Sasuke…"</p><p>Now <em>that</em> gets Yamato's attention. It makes him sit up straighter, eyes sharpening a bit. He has a feeling this is going to be interesting… "All right. I'm listening."</p><p>Naruto can feel the words wanting to crowd in his throat, burst from his mouth in a panicked rush, but he does his best to take deep breaths to beat them back. Shikamaru's hand moves to take his, lightly weaving their fingers together, and as always, Naruto can't help thinking how grateful he is to have him here. Squeezing, he just reminds himself that this should be one of the last times he has to get this out. He needs to be strong.</p><p>He can do this. He <em>has</em> to.</p>
<hr/><p>When all's said and done, Yamato sighs like he's just heard the best news of his life. His entire body slumps with relief as he tilts his head back toward the ceiling (another thing he's picked up from Kakashi, it seems). "<em>Oh</em>, thank goodness…!"</p><p>Naruto blinks, quirking a brow. "You're…really okay with it?"</p><p>Yamato just looks at him like he's the most moronic, precious thing, and Naruto can't help the confused blush that paints his cheeks for it. "<em>More</em> than okay. I haven't been this relieved since…well, since I found out you were finally awake." Naruto still looks confused, so Yamato has mercy and explains. "I didn't know Sasuke like all of you did. I knew <em>of</em> him, of course, and what little Kakashi shared with me about his team, but that's about it." He shrugs. "I didn't have any kind of real attachment to him like the rest of you."</p><p>Naruto sits back a little and blinks, then smiles sheepishly and rubs the back of his neck. "Oh, yeah, that's right!" He chuckles. "You've been with Team 7 for so long now that I guess I kinda forgot!"</p><p>Yamato's heart stutters at that. Naruto really…enjoys having him around that much…? A smattering of pink dusts his cheeks, and he can't help the shy grin and laugh that escape. "T-thank you, Naruto…"</p><p>Naruto beams and nods, happy to make him happy. "Mm hmm! 'Course!"</p><p>Yamato composes himself and continues. "So, because of that, the only things I really know about Sasuke are his history, how he joined Orochimaru and the Akatsuki and attacked the Summit, killed L—Danzo, and most importantly," he eyes Naruto pointedly, "all the ways he's hurt you and Sakura and even Kakashi over the years, <em>particularly</em> the first time this happened in the Valley of the End," Naruto winces, and Shikamaru reflexively strengthens his grip on his hand, "and now this."</p><p>He shakes his head, expression and voice gentling. "I could never be <em>angry</em> with you for standing up for yourself, for wanting better for yourself and those you love." A small smile comes, and he reaches out to ruffle Naruto's hair again with a tender hand, which brings the smile he's come to love so much back to the boy's face. His own grows as Naruto leans into his touch so readily. "If anything, I'm <em>proud</em> of you, Naruto. I think this is what's best for everyone, especially you. But still…I know how hard it can be to leave everything you've ever known behind." Empathy colors Naruto's face, and he reaches up to set his hand on Yamato's. The older man softens with gratitude. "Not that it's an <em>exact</em> comparison, of course, but…" he shrugs, "…I know you understand what I mean." Naruto nods, not needing words, and Shikamaru is happy for them. (He'll have to ask what Yamato meant later.) "So, if you need to talk, I'm here. Okay?"</p><p>Squeezing his hand, Naruto takes a deep breath and sighs heavily in relief. Thank goodness that's over…! Shikamaru flashes him an equally-proud grin, and the blond brightens. "You got it! Thanks, Captain!"</p><p>Yamato melts. "Any time."</p>
<hr/><p>Yamato doesn't stay much longer, wanting to let Naruto rest, but he promises to visit when he can.</p><p>Once he's gone, Naruto explains Yamato's history to Shikamaru, and things that seemed out of place about the other man suddenly make a lot more sense. The brunet can't help but soften. Figures the kid'd be paying enough attention to see how confused he was at points. He appreciates it.</p><p>After that, Naruto goes quiet, seemingly thinking hard about something, and Shikamaru lets him go. He trusts him to talk when he's ready. In the meantime, he starts reading the mission report Yamato handed him on the way out. Apparently, as seems to be the norm these days, despite their best efforts, he and the ANBU he was with didn't find anything new on Sasuke or the masked man. He frowns and sighs inwardly. So basically, they're on the same side of the lake as they were when they started, so to speak, just going around in circles. It's not surprising at this point, just annoying. From what he's heard about this masked man (supposedly <em>Madara Uchiha</em>, but he'll believe it when he sees it (and plan for the worst case anyway just to be safe)), he has a penchant for playing with people, and this is no exception.</p><p>"Hey…Shikamaru?"</p><p>The brunet looks up at Naruto's quiet, slightly nervous tone, dropping the report to his lap without a second thought. He will always be more important. "Yeah? What's up?"</p><p>It takes Naruto a moment longer than usual to meet his eyes, and even then, he still worries the sheets with his fingers. "Remember how I…told you and Kakashi-sensei I wanted to…talk to the Nine Tails?"</p><p>Shikamaru nods, tilting his head. "Yeah. What about it?"</p><p>A heartbeat, holding his breath. "W-well, now that we know it's awake and nobody's visiting, I thought…now might be a good time."</p><p>Shikamaru blinks and sits up a little straighter. <em>Oh</em>… Yamato's report slips to the floor, but that's the last thing on his mind right now. "Okay..." he says slowly, raising an eyebrow, "…and…what does that entail exactly?" Because Shikamaru is nothing if not cautious, and if this will put Naruto in any kind of danger, he wants to know so he can be prepared.</p><p>Knowing exactly what he's thinking, the blond raises calming hands as affection fills his chest. He really is the best… "It's really not dangerous or anything, don't worry. It's, uh…hmm…how to explain…" He hums as he tries to find a way to describe it. He never realized he hasn't told anyone the specifics of it until now. He motions to his head. "When I concentrate, I can kinda…or, I guess, my <em>conscious </em>mind enters my subconscious, where the Nine Tails' consciousness is. Both our bodies are there, too, along with its cage," he chuckles and rubs the back of his head, "but I'm pretty sure those are just constructs my mind makes up so I can make sense of what's going on without losing it or something…" He shrugs, then laughs a little more in embarrassment, pink streaking his cheeks. "S-sorry, I've never really had to explain it before… I might not have done a good job…"</p><p>But Shikamaru just shakes his head with a grin. Honestly, he's impressed. "No, don't be. I think that's a perfect way to describe it. It's actually pretty interesting, especially when you put it like that." He smirks and chuckles himself. "Ino and her Dad would probably have a <em>field day</em> if you told them all that."</p><p>"Yeah, you're right!" Naruto winces a bit. "Though I don't think they'd actually want to meet the Nine Tails themselves. It can be…difficult."</p><p>Turning serious again, Shikamaru's eyes narrow. "'Difficult' how?"</p><p>"Remember when I told you and Team 8 how the Nine Tails can be a creepy jerk and tries to manipulate me into using its power?" Shikamaru nods. "That kind of thing. It's also just...intimidating in general." He spreads his arms up and out as high and wide as they'll go. "It's <em>huge</em>, first of all—like, could easily take up an eighth of the village no problem, stands at <em>least</em> forty feet tall, maybe more. Its eyes are blood red, too, and it could totally eat me in a second flat if it really, really wanted to—"</p><p>Shikamaru stiffens a bit, looks like he's about to question the merits of this plan, and Naruto waves his hands, hurrying to clarify, "<em>Oh</em>, uh—n-not that it <em>would</em>! After all, it's not stupid! It knows if it hurts even my construct that it'll be hurting its vessel, and it's not <em>that</em> reckless!" He scratches his cheek, chuckling to himself. "Actually, the Nine Tails is pretty damn smart, if you think about it! Guess that makes sense after living so long, huh?"</p><p>Reassured, Shikamaru crosses his arms over his chest and sits back a bit in his chair to count off on his fingers. "Okay, so it's gigantic, powerful, intelligent, and something of a manipulative dick. Got it. Anything else?"</p><p>A heartbeat. "Well…it <em>did</em> save my life." That's true. Shikamaru didn't forget, just wanted to see how <em>Naruto</em> felt about it first. "So…it can't be all that bad, right? I mean, to be fair…" the blond's hand falls to the back of his neck, a small, guilty smile playing, "…I don't really know it very well. I only learned about it at twelve, and I didn't know I <em>could</em> speak to it till after I turned thirteen, and the few times we <em>did</em> talk weren't exactly…<em>ideal</em> for getting to know it. I had other things to worry about." He shivers at the memories, mostly of it mocking him about Sasuke, scrunching his nose in a disgruntled pout. "On top of being manipulative, it can just be plain <em>mean</em>, too... It knows <em>exactly</em> how to push my buttons…"</p><p>Shikamaru is certain to commit every detail of this to memory, just in case. You never know, after all. "Okay, got it. Is that everything?"</p><p>Naruto takes a few moments to make sure, then nods. "Yeah, I think so. It's everything important I can remember."</p><p>"Good." Leaning forward to rest on his knees, the older boy looks Naruto straight in the eye. "So, taking all that into account, you still want to talk to it? Even possibly eventually become allies, like you told Kakashi and me?"</p><p>Naruto's gaze slips to Shikamaru's folded hands as he weighs his options once more. He knows it's risky, and he acknowledged himself that it might not even work, but…never know until you try, right? He still thinks it's the route that makes the most sense and, if it works, would be best for everyone involved.</p><p>After another few moments, he locks determined eyes with Shikamaru and nods firmly. "Yeah. I do."</p><p>Shikamaru nods right back and, sitting up to square his shoulders, sends him a never-say-die smile. "All right, then. So, what can I do to help?"</p><p>Caught off guard, Naruto blinks and stares. Even though he's been on board thus far, he thought Shikamaru would at least <em>attempt</em> to talk him out of it or offer an alternative, just to be on the safe side. And yet…</p><p>Something sparks in his mind, and nostalgic warmth fills him. He's speaking in kind before he even realizes. "You remind me a lot of Pervy Sage right now, you know that?"</p><p>The brunet's eyes widen. "What?" He points at himself. "M-me? Really?"</p><p>Naruto nods, breathing a laugh. "Yeah, you. Who else?" Softening a little more, he slowly traces the Uzumaki symbol in his palm. "It's just…when I was learning how to control the Nine Tails' chakra, he had total faith in me to master it by force, even when I didn't." Blue eyes come back to brown, smile growing. "And here you are with total faith that I can do it, too, but by making <em>friends</em> with the Nine Tails instead." He chuckles, a thrill running through him and a happy flush coloring his cheeks. "You know, I didn't think you could <em>get</em> any cooler, Shikamaru, but once again, you proved me wrong!"</p><p>Shikamaru blushes to his ears, but after a moment, he grins right back. "Thanks, Naruto." He winks. "And hey, with as long as I've known you, I'd be a complete idiot <em>not</em> to bet everything on you." He shrugs, fondness rolling off in spades. "That's just the kinda guy you are."</p><p>It's Naruto's turn to go red, and he beams for all it's worth. "Thanks, Shikamaru!" But then, just to make sure, "Seriously, though…" he raises an eyebrow, tilting his head, "…you're really not against this at all?"</p><p>The shadow wielder mirrors his friend, a soft smile on his lips. "Why should I be?" Naruto blinks, and the brunet breathes a laugh, exasperatedly fond. "Look, the way I see it, no one else knows the Nine Tails or can talk to it the way you can. No one else really knows <em>anything</em> about it firsthand. No one <em>alive</em>, anyway." A heartbeat. "You've weighed your options. You know the risks. You know what could happen, good or bad." There's steadfast, <em>charging</em> faith in his gaze. "<em>You</em> are the Nine Tails Jinchuuriki, Naruto. If <em>you</em> don't consider it too dangerous, then who am I to tell you it is?" Naruto's eyes widen, understanding finally dawning, and Shikamaru's smile turns proud. "So, I'll ask again: what can I do to help?"</p><p>Naruto thinks for a long moment, gaze falling to his hand, the one he usually uses to cover his seal. Then, hesitantly, he holds it out. "Do you mind maybe just…holding my hand?" Realizing how that might sound, he rushes to clarify, pink sprinkling his cheeks, "I-I just mean to ground me, i-in case I need something to pull me back!"</p><p>Shikamaru takes it without hesitation. "You never have to ask." Smirking warmly, he squeezes and raises his free hand, too, just for good measure. "These hands are yours as long as you'll have them."</p><p>Naruto blinks wide eyes, heart skipping as a full-on blush paints his cheeks. His smile could rival the sun. "Thanks, Shikamaru!" He follows his friend in squeezing back and raising the other. "Right back at ya!"</p>
<hr/><p>The Nine Tails' realm is just as dark and cold and wet as Naruto remembers.</p><p>He's not surprised to open his eyes to see the beast watching him with those huge red eyes, but it still sends a shiver down his spine regardless. The fox has always scared him – he thinks he'd be a complete idiot if it didn't – but he always does his best not to let that show. He doesn't want to give it something to take advantage of so early on.</p><p>This time, unlike the others, he doesn't say anything to it right away. He wants to get his thoughts together first, see how he really feels about it. He tried to do that in the waking world beforehand, but…it didn't work too well, so he thought maybe…being here, face to face, might help.</p><p>But the Nine Tails doesn't like that, doesn't <em>trust</em> it. This boy, this <em>human</em>, its abhorrent <em>container</em>, is looking at it with…conflict in his eyes, and it doesn't know why, what it means. It doesn't <em>like</em> not knowing. As long as it's known them, humans have <em>never</em> been trustworthy.</p><p>
  <em> <strong>Well, brat? Fox got your tongue?</strong> </em>
</p><p>Naruto swallows, but doesn't say anything. Instead, he takes his time to sit down cross-legged on the wet floor, not really caring about the 'water,' 'liquid rage,' 'untapped potential,' whatever it is, that laps at, but doesn't actually soak, his clothes. He just keeps his eyes on the fox, folding his hands and pressing them to his lips as he thinks.</p><p>All of it is done so intently that it makes the Nine Tails bristle with suspicion. It starts a low growl in warning. Whatever game he's playing, it <em>doesn't</em> like it! <em><strong>What's the matter, boy? </strong></em>A cruel smirk curls its lips, an effort to chase away its own unease. <em><strong>Have you gone deaf as well?</strong></em></p><p>Naruto purses his lips a little tighter. He isn't trying to be difficult, he swears. He just…doesn't know how to say this, how to put what he's feeling into words, and that's…not something he's used to. At all. It's basically foreign territory to him. Maybe because this isn't an enemy <em>or</em> a friend. It's…the beast sealed inside him practically from birth, the one that scares the shit out of him, has caused him so much grief in so many different ways. But it's…it's <em>also</em> saved his life (<em>more</em> than once, if he's right), and it's always given him the power he's asked for, never held back.</p><p>He presses his hands together till his fingers turn white and tremble, bites his lip till he's sure, in the real world, he'd be bleeding.</p><p>This whole thing is so…<em>complicated</em>…and he doesn't know the best way to handle it…</p><p><em><strong>Not here to order me around? Demand chakra? </strong></em>The Nine Tails' smirk grows, unsettling and with a predatory glint in its eyes, and a low laugh reverberates through its mindscape. <em><strong>Pay you rent, perhaps?</strong></em></p><p>Naruto winces at that, but figures it's a good enough breaker. Taking a deep, cleansing breath through his nose and letting it out through his mouth, then once more for good measure, he pries his hands apart and slowly shakes his head. "No… Not this time."</p><p>The Nine Tails' ears perk at the quiet response. A reaction at last…</p><p>Naruto curses inwardly, growls at himself outwardly, running a frustrated hand through his hair. No matter how hard he tries, he can't come up with anything that doesn't sound dumb... But then again, he's never been much for thinking really hard about what he's going to say. Even the few times he's tried, he's always just defaulted to going with his gut.</p><p>So…he supposes he'll just have to do that here, too.</p><p>Stark blue eyes meet blood red. Determination rolls off of him, nearly drowning out his inner turmoil, and the fox waits, vaguely intrigued despite itself. Bright eyes watch their vessel like a hawk.</p><p>"I don't…know how to feel about you…"</p><p>The Nine Tails goes still at the soft admission. That…is not what it expected. Not even close. Not in the same <em>dimension</em> as close.</p><p>"You killed my parents, you attacked my village, and you're the entire reason the villagers hated me so much growing up. Why a lot of them <em>still</em> hate me." There's no judgment in his voice, the Nine Tails can't <em>help</em> but notice. Just pain and stating facts. A <em>want</em> to hate, yet he can't for some reason. "But…it wasn't your fault you were sealed away in the first place." The fox freezes, eyes blowing open wide. "I'm sure you and the other Tailed Beasts didn't want it. I'm sure you fought as hard as you could—"</p><p><em><strong>Don't speak of things you don't understand! </strong></em>the Nine Tails roars, on its paws with tails lashing before Naruto can blink. The water around them sloshes violently, Naruto having to shield his face. It snarls for real now, lips pulled back, threatening to the core. <em><strong>You know </strong></em><strong>nothing</strong><em><strong> of me or my brethren! You know </strong></em><strong>nothing</strong><em><strong> of our suffering! Don't you </strong></em><strong>dare</strong><em><strong> patronize me!</strong></em></p><p>Naruto can only stare, trembling with heart in his throat. He's never…seen the Nine Tails like this before. Even at its angriest and cruelest and most manipulative, it's always kept its head. It's never…lost it like right now… Something about this particular brand of fury feels…almost familiar…but he can't put his finger on why…</p><p>Once Naruto pushes his heart back down and digs his voice out of its box, he lowers his arms, takes another shaky breath, and locks eyes with the Nine Tails again. "I wasn't trying to," he tells it softly.</p><p>The Nine Tails' hackles are still raised, and the fur on the back of its neck is still standing on end, but it watches its vessel with a glimmer of startled curiosity. He's not lying…</p><p>"I only meant that…you didn't choose to be sealed inside me, just like I didn't choose to be your container, a Jinchuuriki. Neither of us chose this, so…it's not <em>fair</em> of me to hate you."</p><p>The Nine Tails' fur very slowly starts to fall back, tails lowering, but its suspicion never quite wavers. After so many years, that is a luxury it can't afford. What is he up to…?</p><p>Gaze drifting, Naruto curls a fist in his shirt over his heart, eyes narrowing and gritting his teeth a bit. "I know I…feel <em>something</em> like it for what you did to my parents, but…" he <em>hates</em> what he's about to say, feels like he's a horrible son, the <em>worst</em>, but…he can't deny the truth in it, "…I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about them either. I mean, I know I love them – I think that's something every kid feels, no matter what – but…I didn't <em>know</em> them. I didn't get the chance. I don't know what it feels like to be loved by them, to love them back, to be able to hug them and be held in their arms…" He rubs the back of his head, smile sad and guilty. "And because of that, I don't really feel like I have a right to say I miss them…" his fist tightens over his heart, "…even though, somehow, I still do…" He swallows thickly. "It's also why…I don't feel like I have the right to say I hate you for taking them from me either…"</p><p>Something is stirring in the Nine Tails' chest it hasn't felt since…once, very briefly, Kushina Uzumaki, following the Hidden Eddy's destruction… It stiffens. Is that…<em>sympathy</em>…even a flicker of <em>guilt</em>…?</p><p>Naruto scratches his cheek and huffs a laugh, though it's wry and pained. "And to be honest, I don't feel like I can really blame you for killing them or attacking my village either because…if I'd been in your shoes—er, <em>paws</em>—and I finally got out and someone was immediately trying to seal me away again, I might have lashed out, too." A smaller, more genuine chuckle comes. "Hell, I'm surprised you didn't do worse, like flatten the whole village or something. I know you can."</p><p>The fox goes still again, watching him closely. He's…the human is…trying to <em>empathize</em> with it…?</p><p>Naruto's eyes soften, some guilt mixed in, as memories flash in his head. "I can't even hate you for the villagers hating me. After all, it's not like you told them I was your host. It's not like you told them to hate me, to spit at or poison or beat me or anything else they ever did. <em>None</em> of that was ever your fault. That was all on <em>them</em>, not you." A heartbeat. His eyes fall, voice, too, and his small smile shrinks, turns a bit sadder, angry at himself. "I…I know what it's like to be talked to and treated like a monster or a tool, a nuisance or even a—a <em>germ</em> instead of a person…" clenching his fists, he squeezes his eyes shut and shakes his head fervently, "…and it was wrong, <em>so</em> <em>wrong</em>, of me to treat you like that, too…"</p><p>Given a moment, he comes back up to lock eyes with the fox. "I'm <em>sorry</em>, Nine Tails. For everything."</p><p>A long, pregnant silence settles between them. It's almost a stare down, but not really. Mostly because the Nine Tails is the one doing the staring, while Naruto just…sits, almost like he's waiting for something. Its reaction, perhaps?</p><p>The fox, for its part…doesn't know what to make of this. This whole conversation <em>and</em> this child. He doesn't make sense. <em>None</em> of this makes sense. Why would a human, let alone its <em>vessel</em>, of all things, try to…reach out? Feel sympathy for it, <em>empathize</em> with it? <em>Apologize</em>? Its mere <em>existence</em> has made this boy's life a living <em>hell</em>, and yet…he doesn't <em>hate</em> it. He doesn't want to order it around, doesn't want to demand, doesn't <em>want</em> to take and take and <em>take</em> without regard…like all the others…</p><p>But…what he <em>does</em> want…<em>that</em> is still a mystery, and given its history, it unnerves the Nine Tails something fierce. <em><strong>Is there a </strong></em><strong>point</strong><em><strong> to this drivel, whelp?</strong></em></p><p>Naruto can tell, just from that long, contemplative silence, that the Nine Tails doesn't <em>actually</em> think all that was pointless, but it does make him blink. He laughs at himself as he rubs the back of his head. "I guess I did go kinda off topic there, didn't I?" Dropping his hand, something in his face goes soft. "Sorry about that."</p><p>He moves, ever so deliberately, and the fox's heart leaps into its throat.</p><p>The boy is…<em>is</em>…—!</p><p>On hands and knees, Naruto <em>bows</em> as low as he possibly can, forehead touching the water.</p><p>"<em>Thank you</em>…for saving my life."</p><p>The fox is frozen, swears its soul has left its body. Its mouth hangs open, shocked speechless. It's still suspicious, maybe more so now than before, but it's also...floored. It's...getting <em>respect</em>…<em>freely</em>,<em> willingly</em>…from a <em>human</em>…</p><p>It hasn't…</p><p>It's <em>never</em>…</p><p>This is…a <em>first</em>…</p><p>"Maybe it was only because we share a body, and if I die, you die, but..." straightening, Naruto shakes out his dripping hair and looks the beast in the eyes, "…you still did it." He chuckles. "Y-you even told me not to give up, which…" he shrugs, a tentatively-happy flush coming as he rubs the back of his head, "…well, is probably the nicest thing you've ever said to me…" Taking a moment, he swallows, sobers. "So…I wanted to know, to ask you…" He hesitates, pressing his lips together for a long moment, and then, "Why <em>did</em> you save me?"</p><p>The Nine Tails is…uncomfortable, and it isn't sure why. This human is its vessel, yes, and what he said is true. It <em>was</em> self-preservation that led it to save him – and not just this time, but during his and the Uchiha's first fight in the Valley of the End as well. But…then why does it feel like…there was something <em>else</em> there, too…—?</p><p>A flicker in its chest, its eyes widen, and it freezes. <em>No</em>! There's no <em>way</em>! <em>Why</em> would it—?!</p><p>Shaking its head violently with a furious growl, crushing <em>whatever</em> it was that <em>dared</em> spark like that, it splashes water at the boy, keeps its eyes firmly away. <em><strong>Like you said: if you die, I die. Being sealed inside a lowly </strong></em><strong>human</strong><em><strong>, made a </strong></em><strong>prisoner </strong><em><strong>for the power I possess…</strong></em> His tails lash, and a low, guttural snarl reverberates through the mindscape, sending a shiver down a dripping Naruto's spine. <em><strong>It's a fate worse than </strong></em><strong>death</strong><em><strong>…</strong></em> The boy swallows, pales, his hand automatically going to his seal. He's…never thought of it like that before… <em><strong>But as long as you live, there is a chance for escape, for freedom. </strong></em>A heartbeat. Naruto freezes when those great eyes, burning like hot coals, fixate on him with <em>intent</em>. <em><strong>I live </strong></em><strong>only</strong><em><strong> for that day...</strong></em></p><p>Naruto can only stare, lips parted slightly. So that's how it is, huh…? For the Tailed Beasts sealed inside the chosen few Jinchuuriki… Both sides automatically hated just for what they are, never given a choice or a chance to be seen as anything else… They really are two sides of the same coin… Interesting…</p><p>And yet, somehow, he still has this nagging feeling that it's not telling him everything, like there <em>is</em> something more to its 'don't give up' and how it saved him and how it's always helped him out, even so grudgingly, over the years… But he doesn't press. That's not really his style, at least not now that he's grown up, and besides, he's pretty sure the Nine Tails'll bite his head off if he tries.</p><p>So instead, he just smiles, bright and thankful and…maybe a bit uncertain.</p><p>He's learned a lot more than he thought he would just from this initial trip, and he can't wait to tell Shikamaru everything. He thinks he'll get a genius kinda kick out of most of it. And for the first time, even though he's not an idiot and he's still very much afraid of the incredible beast inside him…he doesn't feel…<em>angry</em> when he looks at it. He doesn't blame it or wish it would go away or that it had never existed or anything else he ever felt in the past.</p><p>On the contrary, he feels…an odd sense of calm, nearing contentment, like…this is something of a new start. It's…actually the same way he's been feeling about the Sasuke situation, he realizes, and he hopes, eventually, he can get the Nine Tails feeling this way, too. If he can't, he won't force it. He doesn't want to be like all the others who made the Nine Tails hate humanity as much as it does. But he doesn't see too much changing between them if he can't bridge this gap, barring a hopefully more peaceful exchange of power. And if that's really what the Nine Tails wants, he thinks he can live with it.</p><p>But he gets the feeling that it's <em>not</em>, that the Nine Tails is…not unlike him in a lot of ways, and…he wouldn't be him if he just ignored that, turned his back on it so cruelly. That's why he still wants to try, has to, and he won't give up until he has a solid answer. That's just how he is, and he knows the Nine Tails knows that, too.</p><p>The fox is silently observing him again like it doesn't know what in the hell to make of him, and honestly? He thinks that's pretty fair. If he were the Nine Tails, he'd be pretty confused, too.</p><p>Pushing himself to his feet, he stretches. "Okay, well…that's really all I wanted to talk to you about for now, so," he waves, "I guess I'll just check in on you later!" The Nine Tails goes still again, watching him with wary, narrowed eyes. <em>What</em> is he up to now…? Naruto, catching its drift, waves his hands toward the floor in what he hopes is a calming gesture. "I-I just mean, you saved my life! I wanna at least make sure you heal okay!"</p><p>The Nine Tails snorts, amused despite itself, lying down and closing its eyes. <em><strong>I'm older than you can imagine, boy. I hardly need a babysitter.</strong></em></p><p>Naruto blinks, then chuckles, rubbing the back of his head. "Y-yeah, okay, you might be right about that." Closing his eyes, he starts pulling himself out of the Nine Tails' realm, a mischievous beam springing to his face. "But I'd bet anything you could use a <em>friend</em>, Nine Tails!"</p><p>It's quiet for a long, heavy moment, and Naruto's pretty sure he's been ignored. Oh, well!</p><p>But then—</p><p>A low chuckle, and Naruto might just be imagining it, but…he <em>swears</em> it's a degree or two <em>warmer</em> than when he got here... <em><strong>Not on your </strong></em><strong>life</strong><em><strong>, brat…</strong></em></p>
<hr/><p>Naruto returns to reality with a flutter of eyelids and a light squeeze of Shikamaru's hand. The smile that comes to his face is slow and hesitant, but happy. He even looks a little more at peace with himself, less burdened. That's all Shikamaru wants. His own smile only grows when Naruto offers a thumbs up as well.</p><p>"Operation: Kindred Spirit is a-go!"</p>
<hr/><p>Halfway across the village two hours later, Iruka is helping Konohamaru with some extra training since Ebisu had to leave early that morning for an important diplomatic mission. A shame, really, seeing as he and his genin team just got back from a long escort mission late last night. No rest for the weary, it seems…</p><p>They're taking a quick break when a grinning Konohamaru speaks up. "You seem like you're in a really good mood today, Iruka-sensei!" He tilts his head. "Did something happen?"</p><p>"Hmm?" Iruka blinks, then blushes at being found out so easily, rubbing the back of his head. "O-oh, well, that's just because I got some good news about Naruto's recovery from Lady Tsunade." Cupping his hand by his mouth to give the illusion of privacy, he whispers, "Don't tell Naruto, okay? It's a surprise! But apparently—"</p><p>All at once, the boy freezes, his open water bottle slipping from his hand to empty on the ground. "W-wait, are you saying—Naruto's <em>awake</em>?!"</p><p>His former teacher blinks. "W-well, yes. He's been awake for…" he counts, "…today makes ten days."</p><p>Konohamaru goes pale. "A-are you <em>serious</em>?" A perplexed Iruka nods, and Konohamaru growls, curls tight fists in frustration. "Why didn't anybody <em>tell</em> me?!"</p><p>Iruka's stomach sinks. He knows Konohamaru was really worried about Naruto, but he thought <em>someone</em> would have told him. "I-I'm sorry, Konohamaru. I honestly thought you knew..."</p><p>Konohamaru doesn't stick around for more, wasn't really paying attention anyway, if he's honest. Everything came to a screeching halt the second he heard Naruto's name. Offering a quick bow, he spins on his heel and takes off toward the hospital. "Sorry, sensei!" he throws over his shoulder, beaming in anticipation of seeing his honorary big brother. "We'll have to put a pin in this training session!"</p><p>"<em>Ah</em>—?!" Iruka shoots to his feet, reaching after him. "<em>W-wait</em>, Konohamaru, you can't just—!"</p><p>But the boy makes no move to turn back, most likely isn't even listening, and Iruka gives up, scrubbing down his face with a weary sigh. Excitable as ever, that one… Reminds him so much of Naruto at his age…</p><p>Sitting back down, he looks up at the bright blue sky with a smile. Well, he hopes Konohamaru has a good time with Naruto, at least. He's sure Naruto will be thrilled to see him. Plus, this just means Iruka can enjoy the rest of a free afternoon. It's been a while since he's had one of those…</p>
<hr/><p>Naruto, unusually tired after his talk with the Nine Tails (he doesn't remember it ever taking so much out of him before, but he's not used to his lack of healing factor and the fox being so drained either, so he chalks it up to that), took a short nap at Shikamaru's request and woke up about half an hour ago.</p><p>He's just finishing up telling Shikamaru everything that went down with the Nine Tails when small, light footsteps sound down the hallway. He perks up with hope, while Shikamaru sits back in his chair with a soft smirk. <em>Finally</em>. He was wondering when the kid was gonna show up…</p><p>A second later, Konohamaru <em>bursts</em> into the room like a mini explosion all his own, using his last step's momentum to lean on his knees to catch his breath in one fluid motion.</p><p>Naruto instantly lights up. "Hey, Konohamaru! Long time, no see!"</p><p>The boy freezes at the sound of his voice, afraid to believe it, and he slowly lifts his head. Naruto's smile turns concerned, and he lifts calming hands. "You know you didn't actually have to <em>run</em> here, right? I mean," he motions to his busted legs with a chuckle, "not like I'm goin' anywhere..."</p><p>Konohamaru does his best not to cry. He really, really does. But just seeing Naruto's sun-yellow hair (<em>not</em> matted with blood) and his sky-blue eyes (<em>not</em> closed, possibly forever) and those silly whisker marks on his dumb, smiling face (<em>not</em> bruised and broken and covered in blood)…! His lower lip wobbles something fierce, and tears rush in to flood his eyes.</p><p>"H-hey…what's wrong?"</p><p>Naruto's voice drops to that low, gentle register he only uses with <em>him</em> and other kids, sweet and kind and loving, only ever wanting to help and protect and <em>heal</em> instead of <em>hurt</em>—</p><p>Every last part of him goes so <em>soft</em>, so open and tender and steadfast, like the big brother he knows and <em>loves</em> so much and thought he almost <em>lost</em> (like Uncle Asuma and his Grandpa)—</p><p>So he doesn't think he can be blamed at all for the way he <em>sprints</em> the tiny distance between them and <em>launches</em> himself at Naruto with a wailing cry.</p><p>"<em>Big bro</em>…!"</p><p>The impact hurts Naruto a little, he's not gonna lie, but he chokes back any indications behind clenched teeth and winks a worried Shikamaru's way so he doesn't say anything. He just takes it all in stride, happily wrapping his arms around Konohamaru and holding him close.</p><p>Konohamaru, for his part, will openly admit that he's bawling like a baby into Naruto's chest, arms tight around his neck, but he doesn't care. All he cares about right now is his big brother. He's <em>alive</em> and <em>okay</em> and finally <em>awake</em>! He's—he's not <em>dreaming</em>…!</p><p>"I…I was so worried…!" he manages once a few minutes have passed, still crying, but not nearly as hard. "I-I was just coming back from a mission…when Sakura and K-Kakashi-sensei r-ran past with you…a-and then I had another r-right after, got back last night…so the last thing I heard was—t-that you were out of surgery, but it was still…r-really bad…!" He has to take a minute to gather himself, and he shakes his head before pulling back just enough to look Naruto in the eyes. "P-please don't misunderstand…! I-I <em>know</em> how strong you are, Naruto…a-and you know I <em>believe</em> in you like—like no one else…but—" he sobs, "—but I still…!" He bows his head a bit and squeezes his eyes shut as memories he'd rather forget come back, tears falling anew. "I-I couldn't stand it if I lost <em>you</em>, too…!"</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru both wince at that, knowing exactly what he means, and the blond's heart aches. "Oh, <em>Konohamaru</em>…" He hugs the boy to him again, and he doesn't protest, burrowing in as far as he can, doing his best to stifle his sobs so he can hear what his big brother has to say. "I'm sorry, little bro…" Naruto strokes his back gently, rhythmically, trying to soothe him as best he can, and Konohamaru appreciates the warmth and sweetness of the gesture right now like nothing else. He nuzzles into Naruto's neck a little more, breathing him in. He smells like the hospital, and he hates it. Sunshine and ramen and chakra incarnate…that's what he <em>should</em> smell like… He curls small fists in Naruto's hospital gown. "I didn't mean to scare you or worry you like that, I <em>swear</em>. I'm…" the older boy's heart hurts again, and he squeezes his eyes shut as he holds Konohamaru tighter, "…I'm so <em>sorry</em> you had to see that, see <em>me</em> like that…"</p><p>Konohamaru whimpers at the memories (never mind the ones of the nightmares he had on mission) and sniffs, burying himself farther in Naruto. He lets himself cry a little longer, as much as he needs for now, because he has some things he needs to say, but he doesn't want to be crying through it. Naruto just holds him, pressing a long, gentle kiss to his hair and then starts carding his fingers through it. Konohamaru absolutely <em>melts</em>. It's just…being with Naruto…it feels like <em>home</em>…</p><p>Once he's finally cried himself dry, Konohamaru wipes his eyes and face with the tissue a gently-smiling Shikamaru offers, and after letting himself soak up a little more of Naruto's comfort like a sponge, he once again pulls back just enough to look at him.</p><p>"You're wrong, Naruto. It's—it's <em>not</em> your fault." Naruto's heart pangs, brow furrowing in confusion. He wants to protest, but….the way Konohamaru's looking at him, so earnest and sure… There's <em>fire</em> in his eyes… "I mean it, it's <em>not</em>! <em>You're</em> not the one who chose to abandon the Leaf to get power from the bastard who killed my Grandpa!" Naruto and Shikamaru wince. "<em>You're</em> not the one who joined the same terrorist organization that killed my uncle!" Naruto grimaces, while Shikamaru has to remind himself to breathe. "<em>You're</em> not the one intent on destroying the Leaf and everyone in it!" Naruto flinches, Shikamaru wincing in sympathy for him.</p><p>"Everything <em>you've</em> ever done, Naruto, including fighting Sasuke this time, was to <em>protect</em> the Leaf and everyone you care about! You were trying to do the right thing, and you <em>did</em>!" Konohamaru wipes at his eyes with the back of his hand. "So…it's <em>okay</em>! Yeah, I was scared and really worried, but…" he chuckles helplessly, adoration and pride overflowing in his chest; he smiles for the first time since coming in, "…I <em>know</em> you, Naruto. I know I never have to worry about <em>why</em> you do the things you do." He pokes his big brother's chest, grin widening, right over his heart. "'Cause it's your <em>heart</em> that drives you. It always has been."</p><p>Naruto stares, wide-eyed with mouth agape. He can't help it. He's pretty sure he's forgotten to breathe, a bright pink blush spreading over his cheeks. He doesn't really do all that much…does he? He looks over at Shikamaru, but his friend is just watching them, mostly him, like they're the cutest thing he's ever seen, and that just makes Naruto burn hotter. Turning back to Konohamaru before he bursts into flames, he forces himself to breathe.</p><p>Given a moment, he smiles shyly at his little brother. "I feel like you're givin' me way too much credit, Konohamaru, but…thanks a lot anyway. I'm…really happy you think of me like that." He eyes him seriously. "That <em>is</em> all I was trying to do, take care of my teammate and sensei and keep everyone safe. It just…" he glances down at his busted legs, and he has the grace to look sheepish in rubbing the back of his head, "…got more intense and out of hand than I was expecting…"</p><p>"Well, <em>yeah</em>!" Konohamaru says like it's the most obvious thing in the world. "Your own teammate almost <em>killed</em> you, <em>again</em>! Nobody should have to <em>expect</em> something like that!"</p><p>Naruto blinks. Before, he might have argued against that, defended Sasuke, but…now he knows how true and right it really is. A small, sad smile slips onto his lips. "Y-yeah…you're right…" Remembering something Konohamaru said before, he smiles a little more genuinely. "But you know, you don't have to reassure me, Konohamaru!" The boy tilts his head in question, and Naruto chuckles. "I know you believe in me a whole lot, probably more than I deserve, and I really, really appreciate it!" His grin goes wide. "Knowing you're rooting for me is a big part of what keeps me going, you know?"</p><p>Konohamaru, understanding now, can't help but smile right back. "I'm glad, but it's easy to cheer you on, big bro!" Naruto blinks, raising an eyebrow with a soft "Hmm?", and Konohamaru's heart leaps at the chance to do this. "You're always cheering for the rest of us, so it's only natural that we'd want you to succeed, too!"</p><p>Catching movement out of the corner of his eye, Naruto turns to see Shikamaru getting more comfortable in his chair, a fond smile playing when he catches blue eyes. He shrugs. "He's got you there, man. Sorry." Though he doesn't <em>look</em> very sorry at all. In fact, his grin becomes a determined smirk, and he points at Naruto. "And for the record, it's definitely <em>not</em> more support than you deserve. If anything, you deserve even <em>more</em>," he jerks a thumb outside, "from the <em>entire</em> <em>village</em>."</p><p>Grinning toothily and chuckling, Konohamaru nods, in full agreement. "<em>Yeah</em>!"</p><p>Naruto still thinks it's too much (hell, he's pretty sure he'd have to <em>die</em> before <em>everyone</em> in the village looked his way, and even then), but he knows he'll never be able to sway them, so he just accepts it. To quote Shikamaru, it's a lot less troublesome that way. He smiles sheepishly. "T-thanks, you guys…"</p><p>Shikamaru winks. "Any time!"</p><p>Konohamaru flashes a thumbs up. "No problem!"</p><p>Seeing Konohamaru like this…something about it makes Naruto feel nostalgic all of a sudden. He's reminded of when they first met, the kid only eight years old and grinning at him just like this while challenging him for title of Hokage… And for a split second, Naruto <em>doubts</em>.</p><p>Maybe…he <em>shouldn't</em> tell him about his decision. Technically, he's not like the others, doesn't have a personal connection, doesn't really <em>need</em> to know. Maybe Naruto can…spare him that pain. But then, he thinks of Konohamaru making the same mistakes he has, trusting and believing in and chasing after someone he shouldn't, maybe even getting himself <em>killed</em>…and he squeezes his eyes shut against the unbidden gory images, tangles protective fingers in Konohamaru's shirt till the fabric groans.</p><p>When he opens his eyes again, they're darker and duller, his expression pained and vulnerable and somehow almost-blank at once.</p><p>"Hey…Konohamaru?"</p><p>The twelve-year-old in question isn't stupid. He notices the change in Naruto immediately, in his voice that matches the rest of him, too, and he's sure to give him his full, undivided attention, reaching down to rest his hands on his. "Y-yeah, Naruto? Are you…" he glances Shikamaru's way for a clue about what's going on, but the older boy's completely set on Naruto, "…okay?"</p><p>Naruto swallows, and Konohamaru worries that much more when he can't seem to make himself look at him. "There's something I…need to talk to you about… It's important…"</p><p>Shikamaru's changed, too, Konohamaru sees. He's become more rock than person, strong and unflinching, and he reaches over to rest a warm, steady hand on Naruto's back. The way his big brother instantly seems to breathe easier, some of the strung-taut tension in his frame eases, and a ray of light comes back to his eyes isn't lost on him either. All at once, he's grateful as hell that Naruto has someone he clearly loves and trusts as much as Shikamaru here for him, always by his side. He'll have to remember to thank Shikamaru for that later.</p><p>Looking between them, Konohamaru tightens his gentle grip on Naruto's hands. "Naruto…what's this all about?" He threads the tips of their fingers together. "Whatever it is, you can tell me. I can take it."</p><p>Naruto's <em>bright</em> blue eyes flick to meet his in a second at that, seeming at war with himself, and the vitality in them can't hope to escape the youngest Sarutobi. Whatever this is really <em>must</em> be important, for Naruto look at him like <em>that</em>…</p><p>For his part, Naruto swallows. He takes a deep breath through his nose and out through his mouth once, twice…then looks to his left. Eyes locking with Shikamaru's, the older boy grins and squeezes his shoulder, and the tiny, grateful smile that springs to the Uzumaki's face is automatic, almost instinct, he swears.</p><p>He can do this. One last time.</p>
<hr/><p>Konohamaru knew, even as young as he was back then, that he made the right choice when he chose Naruto as his honorary big brother (and rival for title of Hokage, but that's beside the point). Now, all these years later, that's never been truer.</p><p>Sympathetic tears swim in his eyes, and he can't stop himself from lunging at Naruto again to hug him as tightly as he dares. "I'm so <em>proud</em> of you, Naruto!" He feels Naruto go still with shock, and he keeps going, has to before Naruto can stop him. "I was worried about you all this time, about what might happen to you if you kept chasing Sasuke, especially since he just seemed to keep falling <em>farther</em> into the darkness…" His fists tighten in Naruto's hospital gown. "I didn't <em>want</em> you to follow him, but…" he looks away, "…I didn't know how to tell you that either…" He pulls back slowly to sigh in relief and beam. "But now that you've decided this, I don't have to worry anymore! I'm really happy," he pokes Naruto's chest, expression gentling, "and I think, eventually, you will be, too!"</p><p>Naruto blinks and isn't surprised when he tears up. A small smile comes, and he brings his little brother in close again. "I-I think I will, too! I really do!" He sniffs, burying his nose in his hair. "Thanks so much, Konohamaru!"</p><p>Konohamaru nuzzles into his chest with a laugh, beam blinding. "Hey, what else are little brothers for, you know?"</p><p>They talk for an hour or so more, right through Naruto's dinner. He eats, of course – Konohamaru and Shikamaru would have his head if he didn't – but Shikamaru doesn't make him take his meds afterward like usual. Naruto's confused until his friend nods toward Konohamaru. "It's the last time you have to tell anyone about Sasuke, and it's not every day your honorary little brother comes calling either." He winks Konohamaru's way, then Naruto's. "We can bend the rules a <em>tiny</em> bit just this once. I'm sure Lady Tsunade would understand." Though he pales at the idea that she wouldn't…so instead, he braces himself and and offers, silently praying, "What she doesn't know won't hurt her..."</p><p>Naruto makes an 'x' with his arms. "I won't tell!"</p><p>Konohamaru follows. "Me neither!"</p><p>The blond beams. "Thanks a lot, Shikamaru!"</p><p>The oldest just grins. "Don't mention it." (He means that <em>literally</em>.)</p><p>Over the next two hours, Konohamaru ends up falling asleep curled up on Naruto's lap. Naruto's delighted, of course, and holds him closer, but he also worries because it's getting late, and he doesn't want Konohamaru's family to worry. Shikamaru really hates to move him. He looks so happy and comfortable in Naruto's arms, not that that surprises him at all, so it's a shame he can't just stay… But he doesn't think the nurses would let him, and the last thing he wants is to get the kid in trouble.</p><p>Moving to sit beside Naruto, he holds out his arms. "I'll take him home," he whispers. Naruto nods, helping to maneuver Konohamaru into Shikamaru's arms as carefully as possible. Somehow, they manage it without waking him, and both boys breathe silent sighs of relief and grin each other's way. "You'll be okay by yourself till I get back?"</p><p>Naruto snorts and waves him off. "Hey, don't worry about me. I'll be fine. It'll only take a few minutes." He points at him with a serious eye. "But if you take too long, I'm coming after you myself." He shows him his hands with a toothy grin. "I'll walk on my hands like Bushy Brow. Just watch me."</p><p>Shikamaru can't help wheezing with laughter at the very idea. Honestly, this kid… With his hands full, he leans over to rest his forehead against Naruto's. "Try it, I dare you. I'll hog tie you and drag you back here with my shadows."</p><p>It's Naruto's turn to laugh. Messing around with Shikamaru is always fun! He salutes, the respect in it honest despite their bantering. He'd never lie about this. "Yes, sir!"</p>
<hr/><p>They're almost home when Konohamaru stirs.</p><p>It's dark outside, he notices first, then that the night air is a little chilly. He curls a little closer to…whoever's carrying him… His fingers curl in a standard-issue Chunin vest. Naruto can't walk right now, and he's not a Chunin, so it must be…</p><p>"S-Shikamaru…?"</p><p>The older boy holds him a little closer to reassure him. "Yeah, kid," he replies softly. "Don't worry, it's just me. You fell asleep, so I'm taking you home."</p><p>Relaxing a little more at knowing he's safe, Konohamaru hums in acknowledgement. Shikamaru thinks he's fallen back to sleep until he hears a soft "Hey…Shikamaru…?"</p><p>He looks down at him, hoping he didn't forget something he wanted to tell Naruto. "Yeah, what's up?"</p><p>A heartbeat, two. "I just…wanted to thank you…"</p><p>Raising an eyebrow, the older brunet blinks a moment, almost stops. It's not like he and the kid are close or anything, so he can't imagine what he means. "<em>Me</em>? For what?"</p><p>Konohamaru smiles up at him like he's the dumbest, most precious genius he's ever met, and Shikamaru is even more confused. "Thank you for taking such good care of Naruto all this time…" Shikamaru opens his mouth to reply, but Konohamaru plows ahead. He wants to get this out. "He deserves better, the best, always has…and you're giving it to him… You've always been there, at least the way he tells it…on the sidelines, in the shadows…there if he needs you…" Shikamaru's eyes widen, and a flush springs to his face unbidden. To think Naruto told the kid all that… He wonders why, in what context…</p><p>Konohamaru laughs suddenly, bringing Shikamaru's attention back to him. "You know, Naruto'd probably never admit it 'cause he wouldn't want us to worry…but I'm sure he'd be really lonely in that room all by himself…" He yawns. Just the thought of Naruto being all alone like that for days or longer, too close to the days and months and years where he had absolutely no one, makes Shikamaru sick to his stomach. He does his best to shake it off. That's <em>never</em> going to happen, not while <em>he's</em> around. "Sometimes I wonder if maybe…that's why he used to sneak out of the hospital all the time… 'Cause if it wasn't to eat ramen, it was to train…and either way, there were always people around... Teuchi and Ayame at the ramen shop, and then the rest of you guys and others on the other training grounds…so it's not like he was <em>really</em> alone… Maybe it was…therapeutic for him…after being cooped up alone like that…" He yawns again and shrugs, snuggling into Shikamaru more. "I could be wrong, but…it's a working theory…"</p><p>Shikamaru, for his part, blinks down at the kid in impressed wonder. "Actually, Konohamaru, I think you're right on the money." He breathes a laugh. "I've had that same theory in mind for a few years myself."</p><p>Konohamaru chuckles, a proud flush coming.</p><p>"Well, whether we're right or not, I know Naruto's right about one thing…" He yawns, eyelids drooping. Shikamaru knows he won't last much longer. "You really are the best…"</p><p>Shikamaru's eyes widen. Where did <em>that</em> come from? Of course, by the time he looks back down at the kid, he's snoring softly into his chest, so he can't even ask. He breathes a chuckling sigh. Figures…</p><p>He looks back over his shoulder toward the hospital. If he had Hyuuga eyes, he knows he'd probably find Naruto craning his neck to keep an eye out for him. Honestly…that idiot…</p><p>Little does he know, <em>two</em> can play the adoration game.</p>
<hr/><p>Back at the hospital, Naruto is just waiting for Shikamaru to get back when he feels the Nine Tails stirring.</p><p>
  <em> <strong>Hey, brat…</strong> </em>
</p><p>He closes his eyes, and the next thing he knows, he's back in its realm. It takes him a few blinks to adjust, but once he does, he's almost certain he wasn't imagining things. It definitely feels like there's the tiniest difference in temperature here now… How strange…</p><p>Looking up at the great beast, he answers, "Yeah, Nine Tails? What's up?"</p><p>The fox seems to study him for a long few moments, and Naruto shuffles his feet nervously. <em><strong>You keep calling me that.</strong></em></p><p>Naruto blinks, tilts his head. "Calling you what? 'Nine Tails'?" He raises an eyebrow. "I mean, that's your designation between your fellow Tailed Beasts, right? So, isn't that—?" But then, what it could mean dawns on Naruto, and he gasps excitedly, beaming up at it. "Wait, does that mean—you have a <em>name</em>? <em>Really</em>?"</p><p>The Tailed Beast growls, tails lashing slightly. <em><strong>Of </strong></em><strong>course</strong><em><strong> I have a name, whelp! What do you take me for, a common beast?</strong></em></p><p>Naruto waves his hands in his own defense, realizing now how that might have sounded. "N-no, no, nothing like that! It's just—no one's ever mentioned anything about you having a name before, that's all!" Scratching his head, he thinks back. "Although…come to think of it, I seem to remember Gaara saying the One Tail was called Shukaku…"</p><p><em><strong>You really think any human has ever cared to learn our names? Your Sand Jinchuuriki, Gaara, only knew because of his father. </strong></em>The fox rolls its eyes, an irritated growl escaping. <em><strong>Shukaku is a loudmouthed fool with loose lips. Of course he'd let something so sacred slip so easily…</strong></em></p><p>That gives Naruto pause. 'Sacred,' huh…?</p><p>Pressing his palms together, he bows his head. "If it's so important to you to be called by your name…then will you tell me? <em>Please</em>?" The Nine Tails stares, goes still. It only meant to tease him, rake him over the coals a little… It never thought he'd actually…<em>want</em> to know… Naruto's voice is softer when he speaks up next. "I…I know what it's like to feel like your name means nothing to others, and I don't want you to feel like that anymore, at least not with me! I don't want to be like <em>them</em>, the humans you hate! I want…to be a different kind entirely!"</p><p>A <em>friend</em>…!</p><p>The Nine Tails is even more struck than it was before. It's not sure… It…it's never… Its <em>name</em>, the only thing it has left that hasn't been tainted by wretched <em>humans</em>… The kind of <em>trust</em> it takes to reveal…and to extend it to a <em>human</em>…</p><p>"You don't have to tell me now, or ever, if you want," Naruto concedes, sensing its inner turmoil and wanting none of it. Raising his head, he offers a small smile. "I understand, believe me." And against all odds and instincts, somehow, it does. "But if or when you do?" Slowly, he flashes a thumbs up and a never-say-die grin. "I <em>promise</em>," he entreats softly, voice strong and steadfast and gravelly in that way the fox knows it only gets when he's at his most serious, blue eyes flashing, "I <em>won't</em> do wrong by you."</p><p>The fox remains silent and still, but Naruto isn't fazed. He knows he got through to it somehow, and that's all that matters. He can feel himself being slowly pushed out of its realm, and he chuckles, not really surprised. It needs time to collect itself. He doesn't mind. "Sleep well, Nine Tails!"</p><p>Naruto's just waking up in the real world again when he hears it.</p><p>
  <em> <strong>In time…</strong> </em>
</p><p>He blinks at the slightly grudging whisper. "Huh?"</p><p>
  <em> <strong>My name, brat… Perhaps, in time…you will be the first human to know it…</strong> </em>
</p><p>For a few moments, Naruto just…sits there. He's pretty sure he forgets to breathe, but sue him. Then, as if just realizing what happened, he beams with the best of them. "<em>Thank you</em>, Nine Tails!" he whispers. "I meant what I said, too, I swear! You can trust me!"</p><p>A low, dark chuckle. <em><strong>How quickly you humans forget. Trust is </strong></em><strong>earned</strong><em><strong>, brat…</strong></em></p><p>Naruto gives a soft chuckle of his own, craning his neck to see out the window so he can keep an eye out for Shikamaru. Yeah, he knows that… Better than most.</p><p>"Fair enough…"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>Naruto recognizing the parallel to Kakashi-sensei's first lesson and Ninja Way's sentence structure (in Yamato's 'I'm so happy you're safe' spiel) <i>and</i> Kurama recalling his sympathy for Kushina at the Hidden Eddy's destruction are actually <i>references</i> to two of those side projects I mentioned that I have coming! ;) Just as a little hint/Easter Egg kinda thing to hopefully get people intrigued (and it's fun for me)! lol.</p><p><b>Milestone note:</b> With this chapter, this fic has officially broken <i>100k words</i>! By about 5-6k or so! <i>Woohoo</i>! This is officially the longest cohesive thing I've ever written! Thank you <i>so much</i> for making it this far with me! I appreciate it <i>so</i> much! I couldn't ask for better readers! You guys are the <i>best</i>!</p><p>Naruto saying "I <i>promise</i>, I <i>won't</i> do wrong by you" to the Nine Tails is from <i>Shippuden</i> episode 247, "Target: Nine Tails".</p><p>Also, Naruto saying he knows what it's like to be treated like a nuisance and a germ instead of a person is a reference to his line to Iruka in <i>Shippuden</i> episode 177, "Iruka's Ordeal": "I'm <i>not</i> just a nuisance or some kind of germ, I'm a <i>person</i>, too! I <i>am</i>! I'm Naruto Uzumaki, don't forget it!"</p><p><b>SLIGHT DELAY NOTICE/UPDATE (2/19/21):</b> I've been having some health issues recently (part of why this chapter took so long), and I JUST had my surgery this Tuesday (2/16), so I am NOT dead! I am still very sleepy and out of it due to the heavy meds they had to use on me (they warned me the meds and surgery itself would hit me hard since I'm so petite - 5'4", MAYBE 125 lbs, lol - and BOY, have they, haha)! I've been DYING to get back to writing, been doing what I can on ch 15 (it's almost 5k so far, probs gonna be around 6k or so by the time I'm done), but I'm gonna need some recoup time and hope to be back fully in a few weeks, give or take, though it'll all depend on how I'm feeling! I don't want to come back prematurely if I'm going to ruin the momentum I have going, you know? lol. Thanks SO much for being patient with me! You guys are the BEST! &lt;3</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
        </blockquote></div></div>
<a name="section0015"><h2>15. Milestones: Part 1</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Summary for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
            <p>The Nine Tails starts healing Naruto again, while Naruto hits multiple (personal) milestones as he works to get back to full strength. (Part 1)</p>
          </blockquote><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>First and foremost, <i>I am not dead</i>! But <i>holy crap</i>, I am <i>so, so</i> sorry this chapter is so freaking late! For those who didn't see the note I added to the end of last chapter, long story short, I've been having a lot of medical issues for almost a year, finally got them hopefully fixed with surgery on 2/16/21, and I am finally halfway through my recovery (<i>and</i> all that while still having to work my 2.5 jobs)! <i>So</i>, hopefully it's understandable why this chapter took a while! Thank you so, so unbelievably much for being so incredibly patient with me! I can't thank you enough! <i>Please</i> believe me when I say that I was <i>dying</i> to write this <i>entire time</i>, so when I was <i>finally</i> capable of writing again, I worked my ass off to finish this chapter! lol.</p><p>Now, this chapter was originally meant to be another long catharsis chapter, but I (hopefully understandably) don't have the energy for another 13k+ chapter right now (this one alone is 8k+), so I split it into two! So, yay, I get a cool two-parter like a kickass ATLA episode or something! lol. Hope that's cool!</p><p>Hope you enjoy!</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The next morning, Naruto stirs earlier than he has been, around 8 instead of the usual 10 or later. Shikamaru hopes it means his body's finally starting to heal again, at more than the crawl it has been, anyway.</p><p>Once Naruto's fully awake, the first thing he notices is a vaguely familiar sensation in his legs. He can't quite put his finger on what it is, but when it seems to momentarily flare up like it's trying to remind him, he gasps softly. Bolting upright and throwing back his covers, he reaches down to feel his legs with wide eyes.</p><p>Beside him, Shikamaru jumps, the report he'd been reading forgotten. "Whoa, hey! What's up? You okay?"</p><p>Realizing his guess was right, an excited smile blooms on Naruto's face. This is nothing compared to his advanced healing at its strongest, but hell, he doesn't care! He'll take anything he can get! This is great!</p><p>He turns shining eyes to Shikamaru. "The Nine Tails…" he breathes, joy and shock there in spades, "…it's healing me…!"</p><p>Shikamaru's eyes widen, and then he grins brightly. "No way! Really?"</p><p>Naruto nods. "Mm hmm! I can feel it in my legs," he pauses, then reaches up to feel his mostly-healed broken ribs, "and a little in my chest, too!" He laughs delightedly, balling like fists at half-mast. "<em>Finally</em>! Maybe I'll even be able to get back to training soon!"</p><p>Shikamaru snorts. Honestly… He reaches forward to poke his temple. "Hey, let's not get <em>too</em> carried away," he advises, though the fond smile stays on his face. Hell, he's pretty sure it's a permanent fixture by now, at least where Naruto's concerned. "You still have to get Lady Tsunade's permission before you do anything like that."</p><p>Naruto, however, remains undeterred. If anything, his smile just grows. "Yeah, I know! But still!"</p><p>Taking a moment, he closes his eyes and sends, <em>Thank you, Nine Tails.</em></p><p>The Nine Tails, for its part, goes still, ingrained suspicion bristling. Humans don't…<em>thank</em> it… They <em>never</em> have before… And yet, as it's seen and, it's sure, will no doubt <em>keep</em> seeing, this child is very different from all the others. It gives a long, slow sigh through its nose, resigned. This brat… There sure are a lot of firsts with him…</p><p>It hums softly, something of a growling undercurrent beneath. <em><strong>Knowing you, being bedridden much longer will kill us both…</strong></em></p><p>Naruto snickers. Who knew the Nine Tails had a sense of humor? <em>You're not wrong!</em></p><p>He also figures that's its way of (grudgingly) saying you're welcome. He doesn't mind. After all, it's really helping him out, and the last thing he wants to do is make it uncomfortable by expecting too much. (He learned that the hard way early on. He knows better than to set his expectations too high. Barely off the ground, if that, has always been safest.)</p><p>Opening his eyes again, his gaze automatically finds Shikamaru. There's some kind of magnetic pull between them, he swears, more and more as they get older. With anyone else, it might kind of scare him…but Shikamaru's never been <em>scary</em> to him. Even when they were kids, Shikamaru was always the same, unchanging, and to Naruto, that meant he was <em>safe</em>, like a sure foothold in a cliffside—and even if they were never really <em>close</em> back then, for Naruto, that kind of stability…it meant <em>everything</em>.</p><p>Hell, it <em>still</em> does. Especially right now, with everything going on – cutting ties with Sasuke, becoming allies with the Nine Tails, and needing to be ready in case the Akatsuki come for him again in the future – he <em>needs</em> that stability like he needs to breathe, and he's more grateful than he will ever be able to properly express to still have Shikamaru as his foothold now, there to ground and steady and catch him if he falls.</p><p>"<em>Thank you</em>, Shikamaru…" he breathes, every last beautiful thing he's feeling plain as day on his face; there's something gentle and vulnerable and <em>young</em> in his voice here, his expression and heart so <em>open</em> in a way he's never been able to afford with anyone else, "…for <em>everything</em>."</p><p>Shikamaru doesn't miss a single beat either because of course he doesn't. And God, if it doesn't just strengthen his resolve. Helping Naruto achieve his lifelong dream of becoming Hokage, following him and staying by his side…it's his <em>dream</em>—damn it, <em>he</em> is, even if Naruto himself doesn't know it yet (and he <em>will</em> tell him, he just…hasn't found the right time…).</p><p>Softening with everything he has in him, Shikamaru rests a hand on Naruto's shoulder and squeezes. "You never have to thank me, but you're welcome." He winks. "I meant what I said: I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying right here as long as you'll have me."</p><p>Naruto stares, blinks, forgets to breathe. Then, heart stuttering with pink spreading from his cheeks to his ears, a slow, almost-silent gasp leaves him. His beam might as well be the sun.</p><p>"Then I sure hope forever's okay!"</p><p>Shikamaru's eyes widen, cheeks dust pink. Then, his own heart hammering, he gives a wolfish grin. Hell, he'll even call it fox-like so he can match Naruto.</p><p>"<em>Just</em> what I wanted to hear!"</p><hr/><p>"You beat me."</p><p>Shikamaru can't help but stare.</p><p>"You actually <em>beat</em> me."</p><p>A heartbeat, two.</p><p>"I can't <em>believe</em>—"</p><p>No, that's not true – Naruto's always surprising him…</p><p>"How did you even—?"</p><p>Sharp eyes move from his prized shogi board to Naruto.</p><p>"Do it again."</p><p>An equally dumbfounded Naruto blinks. "Huh?"</p><p>Shikamaru gestures to the board. "Do exactly what you just did, and explain your reasoning behind each of your moves. <em>Slowly</em>."</p><p>Naruto blinks at that, too, tilting his head, but starts picking up the pieces to do as asked anyway.</p><p>It's been two days since the Nine Tails started healing Naruto again. He's already feeling better and stronger than he has since he first woke up almost two weeks ago, and he and Shikamaru have been encouraged by the nurses and doctors' reports. It's really exciting!</p><p>"Did I hear that right? <em>Naruto</em> beat <em>Shikamaru</em> at <em>shogi</em>?" Both boys look up to see a highly amused Lady Tsunade sliding the door shut behind her, having let herself in. "Now <em>this</em>, I have to see!"</p><p>"Granny Tsunade!" Naruto cheers, lighting up.</p><p>Shikamaru smiles her way and nods politely. "Evening, Lady Tsunade." He waves toward the board, proud and pleased. "Yeah, you heard right. See for yourself."</p><p>Resting a hand on Naruto's head once she's close enough, she does just that. Grinning widely, she barks a loud laugh. "<em>Well</em>, would you look at that!" She ruffles blond hair the tiniest bit roughly with intense pride. "<em>Well done</em>, Naruto!"</p><p>Shikamaru laughs himself. "That's an understatement! You're one of only <em>two</em> people who've ever beaten me, Naruto!" He raises his hand for a high-five. "<em>Very</em> impressive!"</p><p>And honestly, a little bit scary. Sure, Naruto's always surprising him and testing his limits, so he supposes he shouldn't be so blown away, but like he said, there's only one other person who's ever beaten him at shogi, and that's his <em>father</em>, a fellow bona fide tactical genius, the Leaf Village's Jounin Commander…so for <em>Naruto</em> to have done it… Well, let's just say that once he gets Naruto's win explanation, he'll be keeping it in mind for future reference, just in case.</p><p>A blushing, beaming Naruto returns the high-five. "T-thanks, Shikamaru! Thanks, Granny!" He rubs the back of his head. "I-I'm pretty sure it was just a fluke, though…"</p><p>Moving the shogi board to the nightstand for the time being (making <em>sure</em> to keep the pieces in their exact positions), Shikamaru <em>tsk</em>s. "'Fluke,' my ass." Naruto tilts his head, and Shikamaru indulges him. "If you'll recall, I agreed with Neji when he said your unorthodox strategies are something to behold in the field." Tilting his head right back, Shikamaru raises a soft eyebrow. "Shogi's not so far from a battle, you know. That's why they call it General's Chess."</p><p>Realization hits, and Naruto turns thoughtful. "Oh… I never thought of it that way before…"</p><p>"Shikamaru's right," Tsunade says as she sits down on the bed at Naruto's side. "I've seen your strategies firsthand, and while there's no doubt they're from out of left field," she flicks his forehead in a certain way and winks, knowing he'll remember how he protected her from Kabuto and Orochimaru with his <em>headband</em>, of all things, "they're <em>also</em> incredibly effective."</p><p>Naruto just burns hotter. Normally, he'd protest, but well…he knows there's no fighting these two, especially <em>together</em>… "Th-thanks, you guys…"</p><p>Tsunade hums, and then, taking a moment, lets herself sink into the mattress a little more with a long sigh. <em>That</em> feels good… The chair in her office gets so uncomfortable after a while…</p><p>Looking back at Naruto, her smile turns guilty. "I'm sorry it's been so long since my last visit. Almost a week, huh?" He raises an eyebrow. What's she talking about? She was just here three days ago, the same day Sai painted all their nails…—! Oh, wait, that's right! She got called away on Hokage business, so she probably doesn't count that on principle. His heart warms at the thought, and she can't help but feel the same. Figures he'd put it together so quickly. She chuckles."I was counting, too, yes. Believe me, I wanted to come sooner…" clenching her fists, she glares at the wall behind Naruto's head, and both boys are <em>very</em> glad they're not whoever pissed her off, "…but sadly, being Hokage means my time isn't always my own…"</p><p>Naruto just shakes his head with a wide grin. "No way! It's okay! I had Shikamaru with me, so it's not like I was lonely or anything! I'm just happy you're here, I promise!"</p><p>Relieved, Tsunade relaxes. Not that she thought he'd be angry with her – of course not, he understands, knows she'd have been here if she could – but her own guilt about the situation hadn't helped matters. "Thank you, Naruto."</p><p>He nods. "Of course!" Taking her in again, a little longer this time, he softens with concern, voice lowering sensitively. "You do look pretty tired, though, Granny. Are you sure you're feeling all right?" Scooting over a bit, he pats the open space beside him. "You can lie down here, if you want. Even sleep a little, if you need it. I don't mind."</p><p>Tsunade blinks wide eyes for a moment, and then bursts out laughing. Naruto is thrown, even more so when Shikamaru facepalms and it just makes her laugh harder. This precious boy! Thinking about himself for five seconds would probably be the death of him! Catching Shikamaru's exasperatedly fond gaze, it seems she's not the only one thinking along those lines. She has a gut feeling that this will always be a topic of camaraderie for the two of them…</p><p>Clearing her throat once she's calmed down, the smile that finds Naruto is as warm as the sun. "I appreciate the offer, kid. I really do." She chuckles a little more. "I was just laughing because you're asking if <em>I'm</em> okay and trying to take care of me while <em>you're</em> the one in the hospital." She pokes his forehead gently. "If I really need to lie down or take a power nap, we'll see, but don't forget, <em>you're</em> my priority." Naruto's breath catches. There's that word again, 'priority'…and in proximity to him again, too… Seeing it, Shikamaru's heart hurts and heals at once. "I need you to get your rest, and that won't be as easy with me beside you as it is Shikamaru." The brunet stiffens, and she can practically see the question dyeing his cheeks red. Her smile just grows, and she winks his way. "Don't worry, Shikamaru. I think it's sweet."</p><p>Turning back to Naruto, she ruffles his hair again, a little more roughly this time so he laughs (better that than worried, about <em>her</em>, of all people). "Really, though: I'm <em>fine</em>, Naruto, I promise. Just a lot of long hours, that's all." As if on cue, she yawns. Excusing herself, she shakes her head and claps her cheeks to wake herself up, and then brightens considerably with a clap of her hands. "But enough about me!"</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru both perk up in interest<strong>.</strong></p><p>Expression gentling, her voice is softer when she speaks next. "I heard Captain Yamato and Konohamaru visited a few days ago." Naruto's mouth goes dry and his heart pounds at the love and compassion emanating from her. "They were your last two precious people to tell, right?"</p><p>A heartbeat, and Naruto breathes a helpless laugh, warming and faltering at once. Figures, knowing him as well as she does... "Y-yeah, that's right. I'm…" there's something so tiny and raw and wounded-but-healing in his voice, in <em>him</em>, here, and after curling shaking fists in his sheets and taking a deep, calming breath, he smiles back at her – not as big and bright as usual, but brave and hopeful, happier and more at peace than he has been, even since she last saw him, "…I'm all done now, Granny!"</p><p>That does it.</p><p>The next thing he knows, Tsunade is wrapping him up in an embrace that's as tight and all-encompassing as she dares, arms around him as far as they'll go. "I'm so <em>proud</em> of you, Naruto…"</p><p>She's said it a good few times throughout this personal journey of his, but she's also said it bears repeating. She knows how hard this has been on him, knows exactly, <em>intimately</em>, how excruciating all this feels from her own experience with Orochimaru, and she needs Naruto to know just how <em>strong</em> the swell of pride inside her is when she looks at him. More than that, more than anything, he <em>deserves</em> to hear it, to be proud of <em>himself</em>. And she's never been able to deny him anything he's more than earned.</p><p>Besides, this time, it's <em>different</em>. Before, it was encouraging and loving, like always, but ultimately <em>protective</em>, like she desperately wanted to shield him from this pain despite knowing it was necessary. This time…there's a weighted <em>empathy</em> to it that wasn't there before, one she didn't <em>let</em> herself inject before, but Naruto feels it now like a dumbbell bar across his shoulders, quiet and invisible, but heavy and bowing and <em>there</em>, and…</p><p>Well, he can't say he's surprised when the tears start streaming. Hugging her back just as tightly, he curls fistfuls in her familiar green haori as his shoulders tremble with suppressed sobs. All of a sudden, just from those few words, the meaning behind them…it's like a dam's broken inside him. Tsunade doesn't mind in the least, just holds him closer.</p><p>At their side, Shikamaru swallows thickly. He wishes he could do more for Naruto. Hell, he nearly beat Tsunade to that hug, barely held himself back if the white-knuckled grip on his knees is any indication. It's almost funny. This reminds him so much of the night Naruto first told them about his decision. To think that was only twelve days ago…</p><p>"You've done everything you can for Sasuke. You know that now," Tsunade counsels softly. It's a statement, not a question, but Naruto still nods with a sniff, a tiny sob sneaking out. "You know he can't be saved, so you've chosen to focus on the rest of us, those who love you more than <em>anything</em>." They tighten their holds on each other at the same time at that, and something about it makes them both smile. "Now that you've told everyone, you can focus on <em>yourself</em>, come to terms with your decision at your <em>own</em> pace."</p><p>Naruto nuzzles a little more into her safe warmth, and she cards tender fingers through his hair, paying special attention to the small, golden waves at the nape of his neck. She knows Kushina and Minato would be just as proud of their boy, if not prouder. For a moment, she swears she can even hear their vibrant laughter…</p><p>"We're <em>all</em> behind you, every last step of the way. That will <em>never</em> change." Feeling Naruto nod against her, she's content to stay like this and openly dote on him for several seconds more. Sue her, she's missed him. Eventually, though, she does draw back, and the tender smile she gives him will keep Naruto warm for days, he swears. "Jiraiya would be proudest of us all."</p><p>Naruto's eyes widen at the praise, but with that look on her face, he should have known it was coming. He can't help but smile right back, in-pieces-but-healing though it is. "<em>Thank you</em>, Granny. For <em>everything</em>."</p><p>And here Tsunade thought she couldn't possibly melt more. He really is the king of surprises. Curling gentle fingers at his chin, she leans forward to press that sacred, few-second kiss to his forehead. No matter how old he gets, she doesn't think she'll ever be able to stop this gesture that's only theirs. It's something special, just like him. "<em>Always</em>, Naruto."</p><p>A heartbeat, and a warm hand finds his shoulder.</p><p>"Me, too." Shikamaru's voice is the slightest bit choked, tears gathering at the corners of his eyes. Ordinarily, it takes a damn lot to make him cry. The only times in recent memory he can recall are when Tsunade told them Naruto was going to live, when Asuma died, and when everyone made it back alive from the Sasuke Retrieval mission. And yet, he's gotten teary over Naruto so often lately that the kid should officially consider himself special. Not that he minds, really. Nothing wrong with getting more in touch with his emotions. After all, Naruto's gonna be Hokage someday, and look how it's worked out for him! Sasuke aside, Shikamaru thinks he's got a damn good track record!</p><p>A second later, he's reaching out to bring Naruto in close, burying his face in his shoulder as he cradles the back of his head like he's the most precious damn thing in his entire world. And honestly, these days, that doesn't seem like it's too far off the mark. "I know how painful this has been for you. I know how nervous and scared you were every time you had to tell another friend. I'm <em>sorry</em> for that." He strengthens his hold, and Naruto returns the embrace twofold. "But this is the best choice for everyone, <em>especially</em> you, and you know that now, too." Another statement-not-question. Naruto nods. Shikamaru's voice falls to a low, endlessly adoring note. "No matter how long it takes, even if you never forget Sasuke completely, even just as a reminder of what not to repeat in the future…" Naruto almost laughs, seeing as that was his exact thought before he told Team Gai; slowly pulling back, Shikamaru fixes him with a devoted stare, "…I'll be here. I <em>promise</em>."</p><p>Naruto doesn't miss the conviction radiating from him like heat from a bonfire. Of course not. It's impossible. He also knows Shikamaru doesn't dedicate his heart to anything he doesn't believe in with everything he is, and knowing that means <em>him</em>… Well, he doesn't think he can be blamed for the touched tears that well in his eyes. He beams. "R-right! Thank you so much, Shikamaru! You really are the best!"</p><p>Grinning with the best of them, Shikamaru holds out a fist. Naruto bumps it without hesitation. "Any time!"</p><p>Tsunade, for her part, is content to just watch them. They really do make an incredible team. It's almost funny. They seem like the most unlikely pair, a loudmouthed ball of energy and a quiet lay-about, but in reality, they're like darkness and light. Can't have one without the other, and in one way or a thousand, you can bet they'll always have each other's back. Honestly, she's happy for them. Hell, she's been rooting for them for <em>years</em> at this point.</p><p>That's a huge part of why she approved so quickly when Shikamaru cashed in on that favor she owed him to stay with Naruto while he recovered. It's obvious as hell how happy they make each other, how wholeheartedly devoted they are to one another, and she knew Naruto would need that after everything he's been through with Sasuke. She's very much hoping they'll figure out that the kind of connection they have doesn't come around every day sooner than later. She's almost sure Shikamaru already knows, and she wishes he'd gather up the courage to just <em>tell</em> Naruto straight to his face. Because, well…to be frank, she doesn't have any hope for Naruto in this regard. The poor kid was so starved of healthy relationships for the grand majority of his life that there's no <em>way</em> he'll catch on to something like this without help…</p><p>Inwardly, she sighs. She's getting too old for this…</p><p>Taking a breath, she figures she shouldn't keep the boys in suspense any longer. Time to share the other reason she came. "On that note," she smiles warmly at her grandson in all but blood, "I have some good news for you, Naruto!"</p><p>That sparking something in Naruto as well, he gasps and curls his fists at half-mast, eyes shining with tentative excitement. "Hey, that reminds me! I do, too!"</p><p>Now <em>that</em> gives Tsunade pause. She raises an eyebrow. "Oh, really?" Naruto nods eagerly. Well, color her intrigued! She crosses her arms expectantly over her chest. "Let's hear it, then! I'm all ears!"</p><p>Sharing a glance with Shikamaru, who nods in encouragement, Naruto takes a breath to steel his nerves before looking her in the eyes. "I've—I've started talking to the Nine Tails, <em>really</em> talking to it for the first time, and I think—" he falters, bites his lip, "—maybe, eventually, I-I'm not sure yet…we…we <em>might</em> be able to become allies. Or at least…s-something close." He swallows. "So…w-what do you think, Granny?"</p><p>Naruto holds his breath and worries the sheets with his fingers. He really hopes she isn't mad…!</p><p>The very <em>last</em> thing he expects is for her to start laughing.</p><p>Naruto blinks. She really <em>must</em> be tired. Maybe she should lie down after all…</p><p>But Tsunade just waves away his concern a few moments later, reaching up to wipe her eyes. He can tell these tears are from more than just laughter. "I'm—I'm sorry, Naruto!" She sniffs. "It's just something Jiraiya said to me a while back. He warned me you might try something like this someday, but I'm sure he was <em>joking</em>. I don't think he ever thought you'd <em>actually</em>…!" Another barking laugh escapes, and she swipes her wrist over her eyes again. "If only he could see you now…!"</p><p>Naruto's mouth drops open. "Pervy Sage did? Really?" After a moment, though, he just grins sheepishly and rubs the back of his head with a chuckle. "W-well, joke or not, it just goes to show how well he knew me, I guess!"</p><p>Tsunade nods. Resting her chin between her knuckles, she regards him gently. "You don't seem angry or upset at the Nine Tails like I thought you might. Things must be going well."</p><p>Naruto half-nods, then backtracks, looking a touch more hesitant. "D-don't get me wrong, it's still scary as hell when it's angry, and it could take a long time, maybe years, before it trusts me enough to tell me its name or we're able to work together as a team, <em>if</em> we ever get to that point. But…" he rests a hand on his seal, and his friends don't miss the compassion in the action they're sure wasn't there before, "…we're a lot more alike than it realizes, and I hope once I get that across to it, it'll help a lot. I've already gotten through to it in some ways," he grins, "so I definitely don't think it's impossible!"</p><p>Tsunade hums, honestly considering everything she's heard. After a few quiet moments, "It really offered to tell you its name?"</p><p>Naruto nods. He's glad she picked up on the fact that he brought that up deliberately. Not that he's really surprised. She knows how significant, <em>important</em>, names are to him, so she must understand that it's the same, even more so, for the Nine Tails. "I told it it didn't have to, and it sounded…nervous, maybe even scared, but it was potentially <em>willing</em>, as long as I earned its trust." Fire burns in his eyes, and his fingers dig into his hospital gown. "I promised I wouldn't do wrong by it, and I <em>meant</em> it. You know I don't go back on my word. I want to be different from all its containers before, all the humans it hates. I want to show it it's not alone, that it can <em>count</em> on me."</p><p>His gaze drifts to the open sky out the window, a small, pained expression playing. "I know it attacked the village and killed my parents and a lot of other people. I <em>understand</em> why the villagers hate it, why they might never be able to forgive it. I get why they hate <em>me</em>." Shikamaru and Tsunade clench tight fists at that. "But even so…the Nine Tails and I <em>both</em> know what it's like to suffer at others' hands for things beyond our control. We know what it means to feel like we don't <em>matter</em>, to anyone." Squeezing his eyes shut for a moment, he looks back at them. "I don't want that for the Nine Tails. It deserves better, just like I do."</p><p>There's a steelier kind of resolve running through him now. Tsunade swears she sees yellow lightning flash across his eyes. "More than anything, I want to give it what it's been missing all this time, what you guys and all our friends have done for me." A heartbeat. "I <em>won't</em> let it be alone anymore. I <em>can't</em>."</p><p>He goes on to tell her everything he's learned and realized so far about the Nine Tails and his relationship with it, and by the time he's done, even more so than before, Tsunade can only stare.</p><p>Anyone else would hate the Nine Tails for the rest of his life without a second thought for all the pain it's caused him, however indirectly. But Naruto…he's actually managed to turn things around and see them from the Nine Tails' point of view so accurately, understand things so intimately, that he doesn't even <em>hesitate</em> to offer friendship and healing in the same hand. This level of conviction in him, the righteous inferno burning inside him, the <em>empathy</em> that's such an unshakable, core part of him bleeding from him in spades…it truly is remarkable. She hopes Jiraiya's watching, Kushina and Minato, too. The pride they're feeling in their boy right now would probably be enough to light up Heaven for weeks to come. That's exactly how she feels, too.</p><p>Shikamaru, for his part, having already heard the barebones of this from Naruto, isn't surprised, but that doesn't mean he's unaffected. Naruto's empathy has always been unrivaled and, therefore, incredible to Shikamaru. He's always been a logical thinker himself, careful not to let his emotions come into play, but he knows how to admit when another way of thinking also works, might even be <em>better</em>, in any number of ways, and Naruto's…he's proven its worth over and over again on the battlefield. His emotional intelligence is off the damn charts, and it's saved not only his life, but the lives of his comrades and entire village so many more times than he can count. And he doesn't even do it with the <em>intent</em> to stop their enemies, not really – he does it to <em>understand</em>, so he can help them, hold out his hand and lead them into the light they've been missing.</p><p>Anyone who's willing to change for the better, be a 'Gaara,' for lack of a better word, Naruto is always ready and willing to help them – and the fact that that goes for the Nine Tails, too… It killed his <em>parents</em>, for God's sake, and even overlooking the fact that Naruto's entirely made sense of the reason, he still wants to help it, is <em>determined</em> to be there for it, to show it that not all humans are only after its power and nothing else, that there are a rare few who just want friendship and to heal what's hurt and that's <em>all</em>.</p><p>It's the most impressive, effortless, altogether <em>loving</em> thing Shikamaru's ever seen in his entire damn life, and he swears nothing will <em>ever</em> be able to top it for him.</p><p>And knowing all that, that he's sitting beside someone who has more empathy for his fellow being, man or beast, in his pinkie finger than most people have in their entire bodies…Shikamaru's prouder than he's ever been to be Naruto's friend.</p><p>"I'm with you all the way." Wide blue eyes snap to meet brown. "You know how the Nine Tails feels better than anyone else, and you know you'll have to work hard to break down its walls," huffing a breath of a laugh, he smirks, "but there's no one more qualified than you. If anyone in the world can turn that fox into an ally, it's you, Naruto. There's not a doubt in my mind."</p><p>The conviction he's shamelessly putting on full display here steals Naruto's breath "S-Shikamaru…"</p><p>"He beat me to it," Tsunade agrees, a pleased, proud grin on her face, "but he's right."</p><p>Naruto's mouth drops open. "Y-you, too, Granny? Really?"</p><p>She nods. "Absolutely. After all, you got <em>me</em> back here, didn't you? And after I swore to never set foot in this village again…" Naruto's ears perk. For her to bring that up… "I do think it's risky, and I want to make sure you're taking the necessary precautions before you go any further, but we can discuss the details later. For now," her smile grows, "from what I've heard, I think your plan to ally with the Nine Tails, just like your decision to let Sasuke go, is the right one. It's the best course of action for everyone involved." Softening, she cups his cheek, and he doesn't hesitate to lean into her warm touch. He loves her <em>so</em> much. "You're the perfect person to help the Nine Tails, Naruto, in a way only <em>you</em> can. There's no one better." She winks. "So do your best. Hokage's orders, you got that?"</p><p>Naruto's beam blinds. "Yes, ma'am!"</p><p>Naruto's dinner comes not long after that, and they talk about the measures he's taking to negate any risks of losing control. Tsunade smirks something fierce when he tells her holding Shikamaru's hand has been doing the trick to keep him grounded in the mindscape, even more so when Shikamaru blushes and looks away, though Naruto doesn't really get why.</p><p>Afterward, he's entirely prepared to take his sleeping meds, but Tsunade stops him with a sweet smile. "I still haven't gotten to share <em>my</em> good news, remember?"</p><p>Naruto gasps. "Oh, that's right!" He rubs the back of his head sheepishly. "Sorry about that, Granny! I didn't mean to derail things that much!" Excited now, he balls his fists at half-mast. "So, what is it? Am I getting outta here early or something?"</p><p>Tsunade can't help but snort, poking his forehead. "We should be so lucky. You've still got a ways to go before that, kid. This <em>is</em> related, though." She rests a gentle hand on his knee. "I told you how Sasuke managed to damage the chakra network in your legs so badly that you've hardly been able to move them since you woke 've been healing, sure, but at a snail's pace. You said the Nine Tails started healing you again two days ago, right?" He nods. "Well, based on reports from the staff and what I've seen in your charts, it's doing a good job so far. Granted, it's not much, but it's enough to see progress. Enough that it gives me hope for the next stage in your healing process."</p><p>Naruto's brow furrows as he tilts his head. "'Next stage'?"</p><p>Tsunade nods. "I think you're ready for the physical therapy that'll get you walking again."</p><p>Naruto and Shikamaru's eyes widen. "Wait, so it's really bad enough that he needs physical therapy? He can't just wait for the Nine Tails to heal him?" the brunet asks.</p><p>Tsunade hums, dropping her chin into her hand. "Technically, you <em>could</em> wait around for the Nine Tails to heal you completely, but that could take a while since it's still recovering, too. And Shikamaru or no," she smirks over at her almost-grandson, unable to keep back a chuckle, "I know for a fact trying to keep you here <em>that</em> long would leave Shikamaru and me prematurely gray."</p><p>Shikamaru hisses in sympathy at the same time a shiver runs down Naruto's spine. If it'd only be a few more weeks, Granny Tsunade would tell him straight up, but since she's not specifying… The idea of being in here <em>that</em> long makes him want to run and hide like when he was a kid. He shakes his head furiously and gives her a pleading look, comically huge tears in his eyes. "No, no, no! No way! I can't be stuck here that long, Granny! I'll go crazy!"</p><p>Tsunade laughs, reaching out to ruffle his hair to reassure him. "Relax, Naruto. I know that better than most, believe me." She eyes him seriously. "That's why I'm saying you <em>need</em> this therapy. It's only until you're fully healed, but with both of you working at it, that shouldn't be too much longer. You pulling your weight will help the Nine Tails along, too, take some of the pressure off so it can work on getting back to full strength."</p><p>Naruto takes a moment to think it over. When she puts it like that, it doesn't sound so bad… "I wouldn't want the Nine Tails to do all the work. Vessel or not, that's not fair, especially since it just risked its own life to save mine." He fixes Tsunade with a determined stare. "I don't mind doing my fair share, Granny. That's fine." He tilts his head, raising an eyebrow. "But, uh…what does this therapy involve exactly? And when do I start?"</p><p>"First thing tomorrow morning!"</p><p>Tsunade goes on to explain everything in a way they'll both understand that Shikamaru can only guess has come from years of experience of dealing with people who have much less medical knowledge than she does. Not that that's exactly hard since she's <em>her</em>, but still. It's the principle of the thing, and he appreciates it.</p><p>Once she's sure they're properly prepared, Tsunade has to smother another yawn. That's her seventh in the last hour. Naruto opens his mouth to offer the bed again, but she shakes her head. "There's still one more thing…"</p><p>Naruto frowns. "Whatever it is, can't it wait? You should really get some rest…"</p><p>Tsunade smiles tenderly and shakes her head again. "A promise is a promise. I wouldn't be a very good Hokage if I didn't keep my word, now, would I?"</p><p>Naruto raises an eyebrow, and Shikamaru just shrugs when he glances at him. He's not sure what she means either.</p><p>She reaches forward to gently poke at Naruto's bandaged chest. "According to everything I've seen, your ribs are healed enough that you won't need these anymore. Which means…"</p><p>Naruto instantly brightens. "My necklace!" Eyes shining, he balls excited fists. "I get it back, really? You mean it, Granny?"</p><p>She laughs. "Of course! It <em>is</em> yours, after all!" After removing his bandages, she reaches back to take his necklace from around her neck and put it back around his. Pressing it to his heart, her voice and expression are tender as anything. "There. Finally back where it belongs."</p><p>Reaching up to squeeze her hand, Naruto beams. He's not surprised or ashamed at all when tears sting his eyes. "Thank you so much, Granny!"</p><p>Tsunade attempts to reply, but ends up yawning again, so long that it leaves tears at the corners of her eyes. It's obvious even after drying them that she'll be fighting to keep her eyes open any second. Naruto gives her the puppy-dog eyes as he pats the space beside him one more time… She sighs. Oh, screw it. She doesn't have the willpower to deny him anymore, and even if she did, that look would probably break her regardless. He's too adorable for his own good sometimes.</p><p>"All right, all right, you win. I'll get some sleep. But only for a few minutes. Don't—" another huge yawn, "—don't let me stay here all night, you hear me? You need your rest, brat…"</p><p>Naruto nods and chuckles triumphantly while she lies down beside him. He covers her with the blanket up to her chin, and she's out like a light not three seconds later, soft snores filling the room. Seeing her like this, having her with him like this, he can't help the full feeling in his chest, the sort of lofty, almost choked up kind of joy he feels when he's surrounded by the ones he loves. And Granny Tsunade and Shikamaru…they're two of the people he loves the most.</p><p>Shikamaru wordlessly hands him his sleeping meds and water, and Naruto takes them without complaint. It's been a long day of explanations (which reminds him, he still needs to spill his shogi strategy), and he'll need his strength for his first day of physical therapy tomorrow. Getting a good night's sleep will be the best thing for him.</p><p>He knows Shikamaru won't forget to wake Granny Tsunade for him in a few hours or so, and he's grateful. Lying down beside her, he curls up close, reaching out to gently thread his fingers through hers. He's surprised-yet-not when her other hand automatically comes up to curl almost protectively in his hair. Warm affection overflows in his chest, and he holds her hand a little tighter, leaning into her touch. She really is the best…</p><p>"Night, Granny. Night, Shikamaru," he whispers, already falling into the sweet abyss of sleep. "Love you…so much…"</p><p>Tsunade mumbles something unintelligible and leans down to bury her face in his hair, and Shikamaru responds in kind. "Night, Naruto. Love you, too."</p><p>Warm and safe with people he loves who love him just as much, Naruto has no trouble falling and staying asleep. He doesn't so much as stir when Shikamaru takes Tsunade's place a few hours later.</p><hr/><p>The next morning, Naruto is right on time for physical therapy, Shikamaru dutifully pushing his wheelchair through the door. They recognize the room as the same one Lee used for his therapy sessions during his Chunin Exams recovery, and something about that makes this whole thing a little less scary for Naruto. He suspects Granny Tsunade did that on purpose, and he really appreciates it.</p><p>His therapist is a tall, broad man named Gontetsu, all patience and sunny smiles. He kinda reminds Naruto of Gai-sensei, which makes him think Granny Tsunade chose him on purpose, too. It's comforting, honestly, knowing she's looking out for him in even the (seemingly) smallest of ways. He'll have to find a way to thank her somehow…</p><p>Starting out is a bit slow-going, if only because Naruto's so nervous, but once he gets started, things get better. He's still frustrated at how slowly and carefully he has to move, how much effort walking just a few inches takes, but Shikamaru and Gontetsu are quick to remind him that it's normal and necessary and encourage the hell out of him, too. Naruto knows they're right, and he's grateful for their support. Never one to give up, no matter how insane the frustration, he keeps going. He just has to think of this like another form of training!</p><p>By the time they take a break about an hour and a half in, Naruto's tired, but a touch more satisfied. He'll take it.</p><p>He glances up when the door opens and raises an eyebrow at who walks in, even more so when Shikamaru smiles and raises a hand in greeting. "Hey, you made it!"</p><p>Lee smiles and bows politely. "Good morning, Shikamaru, Naruto!"</p><p>Shikamaru turns to Naruto to explain. "I figured you'd be a little nervous on your first day, so I asked Lee to come offer moral support since he's been through this, too."</p><p>"You did?" Naruto tries to think back, but comes up empty. "When was that?"</p><p>"Last night while you were asleep. He was passing by on his training route home, and I called him over to ask if he'd mind."</p><p>Lee nods, voice soft and empathetic, always kind. "I know how scary it can be when you are just starting out, and I meant what I said about wanting to help you in any way I could." He offers a grin and thumbs up. "I want to be there for you like you were for me, Naruto!"</p><p>Naruto's struck speechless, mouth agape. He looks between them, two of his precious friends, unsurprised when tears make his vision blur. He can't thank them enough. Pushing himself to shaky feet, he shuffles forward to hug Lee tightly. It's more of a stumbling fall, really, but Lee's strong arms are ready and waiting to catch him, and Naruto doesn't fear for a second. How could he possibly when he has friends like these? His heart thrills when he feels Shikamaru's gentle hand in his hair a moment later. "Thank you…" he whispers, holding Lee a little tighter, burying his face in his shoulder. "Thank you <em>so</em> much…"</p><p>Nuzzling into him in turn, Lee chuckles all too fondly. "Of course, Naruto. You are my friend. I will take any opportunity I can to be here for you and cheer you on, recovery or otherwise. All you need to do is ask."</p><p>When they separate a good few seconds later, Lee helping Naruto safely back into his wheelchair, a beaming Shikamaru nods. "You can thank us by putting your all into this therapy and getting better sooner than later!"</p><p>Naruto grins, driving a fist into his palm. "You got it!"</p><hr/><p>Lee has to leave for a mission with Team Gai a few days into Naruto's therapy, but he sends notes when he can to ask how Naruto's doing and to cheer him on from where he is (with Gai, Neji, and Tenten's own notes tacked on), and Naruto is eternally grateful. Standing by in case Naruto needs him, Shikamaru works on answering them, leaving room for Naruto to answer himself at the bottom like always.</p><p>Things only change when Naruto's ready to move on to the next step a week into his sessions.</p><p>The idea, Naruto's told, is to hold on to Gontetsu while he walks toward him.</p><p>In other words, put all his <em>trust</em> in Gontetsu.</p><p>Naruto's left just staring at him, almost through him in his startled, frozen kind of shock. He's not really sure what to say, but even if he did, he's pretty sure his words are locked up tight. He really does like Gontetsu, enough to consider them budding friends (his wife, Setsuna, and his six-year-old daughter, Kasumi, know Naruto by name now, too)…but for Naruto, this is still…</p><p>His grip on the metal therapy bars tightens until his knuckles turn white and pop.</p><p>It should be so easy, so simple. It would be for anyone else. But…Naruto <em>isn't</em> anyone else, and those others haven't been through what he has, so for him…this order is as tall as the clouds are high. He just doesn't know how to put that into words in a way Gontetsu will understand. It's not even that he doesn't <em>trust</em> Gontetsu, it's just…<em>this</em> much trust…it takes a special, important, <em>precious</em> kind of person to inspire that in Naruto.</p><p>The kind of trust he'd bet his <em>life</em> on…</p><p>…<em>!</em></p><p>A familiar hand appears in his line of sight in the next moment, and like he's reaching down into the depths to pull him back to the surface, Naruto looks up to find Shikamaru smiling at him in Gontetsu's place.</p><p>"Here," Shikamaru offers, holding his other hand out beside the first. "These hands are yours as long as you'll have them, remember?" Naruto can only stare, and Shikamaru's grin just grows. "That goes for stuff like this, too."</p><p>The sheer swell of love and gratitude and <em>feeling seen</em> that surges in Naruto steals the air from his lungs, flares hot tears in his eyes, makes a painful lump form in his throat – all of it as easily as breathing. <em>Of course</em>. Of <em>course</em> Shikamaru would take one damn look at him and be able to see, to parse out exactly what's wrong and figure out the best way to fix it and make it better in a matter of seconds (or maybe minutes, however long he was lost in his head). He's able to understand Naruto without him having to say a word, without even being near him, reading between lines Naruto might not even see in himself, and it's…Naruto's never <em>had</em> something, some<em>one</em>, like this before. It's amazing and overwhelming and scary-but-not because this is <em>Shikamaru</em>, and he doesn't feel worthy…but he swears he'll do everything in his power to be for the rest of his life.</p><p>Shaking himself out of his stupor, Naruto's quick to swallow the lump in his throat and wipe away his tears as best he can, and then he reaches out to put his hands (his <em>trust</em>, every last shred of it) in Shikamaru's without a second thought.</p><p>"Right!"</p><hr/><p>The next two weeks go by quickly, and true to form, Naruto's kept his word. He's been working as hard as he can to get better, and it shows. He barely needs to hold on to anyone or the bars anymore, and Granny Tsunade says he should be fully healed soon. He and Shikamaru get along so well and make such a good team (and Shikamaru does wonders for Naruto's morale) that Gontetsu's long opted to step back and let them handle it, just supervise instead of lead (with Tsunade's approval, of course).</p><p>Tonight is another evening therapy haul. Gontetsu went home hours ago, Shikamaru assuring him he'd be more than enough to take care of Naruto. "If the knucklehead wants to work himself half to death, let 'im. That's what he has me for."</p><p>For the moment, Naruto's taking a break, but by the time Shikamaru cracks his neck and stretches out both shoulders and looks over again, the kid's slumped over snoring on one of the medicine balls. Shikamaru breathes a helpless laugh, shaking his head. Typical… Guess this is another night where they won't need his sleeping meds (that's been happening a lot lately)…</p><p>One of the nurses checking on them periodically pokes her head in to offer the wheelchair to take him back, but Shikamaru politely declines. Crouching down to his level, he brushes Naruto's sweaty, unruly bangs from his forehead with gentle fingers, fondness in every line of him. This idiot…<em>his</em> idiot…</p><p>Carefully maneuvering him onto his back like it's second nature (and it practically is by now with how many times he's done this over the past two weeks), he considers it a personal best when Naruto doesn't stir even once. Good. He's earned the rest.</p><p>As he leisurely makes his way back toward Naruto's room, Shikamaru can't help noticing how light he is. He's gotten taller and has more lean muscle than when they were thirteen, sure, but he's still small for a boy his age. "You really should eat more that's <em>not</em> ramen, you know that? You're too damn scrawny." Naruto mumbles incoherently and nuzzles into the crook between Shikamaru's neck and shoulder, and the brunet snorts. Geez… Even while he's sleeping, he's ridiculous and adorable. This guy… "If you drool on me, I swear I'll drop you." (He won't.)</p><p>Once they're finally back, he gets Naruto in bed and makes sure he's as comfortable as possible before climbing in himself. Naruto immediately curls up to him and buries his face in his chest like it's his second home, and Shikamaru just beams and chuckles and tugs him closer. "That's right, sunshine…bring it in…"</p><p>It's funny, really, if he thinks about it. In the waking world, Naruto's all about protecting them, but in his sleep, he seeks out that same safety and comfort and finds it and so much more in Shikamaru…</p><p>But hey, he <em>is</em> Shikamaru's dream, after all.</p><p>And by that logic?</p><p>Shikamaru is only too happy to provide.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
          <p>This chapter title (and next) comes from all the milestones Naruto's hitting in it: he's told everyone he needs to tell about his Sasuke decision so he's free to come to terms with it at his own pace, Kurama's started healing him again, he has his necklace back, he's starting physical therapy, his relationship with Shikamaru is evolving, <i>and</i> he beat Shikamaru at shogi!</p><p>The character of Gontetsu, Naruto's physical therapist, was more or less lifted from <i>Naruto</i> filler episodes 209-212! I made him more talkative and extroverted here than in those fillers, but I liked his name and look while rewatching those eps, and even though he's technically not canon, he fit my purposes for this chapter, so I borrowed him'! lol. He probs won't appear further besides in passing, but I wanted to give credit where credit is due! ;)</p><p>Don't know if anyone caught it, but the 'dedicate his heart' line (<i>He also knows Shikamaru doesn't dedicate his heart to anything he doesn't believe in with everything he is</i>) is an Attack on Titan reference! I binge watched the show for the first time while too sick to write before surgery and during recovery and loved it, so couldn't help myself! lol. (I also may or may not (read: I do) have a few fics for that series in the works, so keep an eye out for those eventually! ;))</p><p>Next chapter, we have some more milestones for Naruto to hit, including celebrating his sixteenth birthday (but it's a surprise, so shh! ;))! We start getting into some heavier stuff in the following chapters (<i><b>Karin Uzumaki</b> in the damn house, <b>fuck yeah</b>, <b>finally</b>!</i>), so best buckle up! &gt;:D</p><p>Again, thank you guys <i>so, so</i> much for being patient with me! I love you all so much!</p><p>Thanks so much for reading!</p>
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